The pair had ended their dance and were walking out of the venue back to Julian's car. Julian had grabbed her hand once the song ended and hadn't let go since.
Trinity peeked up at him. "You kissed me."
He snorted and kept his eyes pointed ahead. "Why yes, I do remember doing that."
Trinity couldn't think of much to say at the moment. She was lightheaded and her thoughts were cloudy. She wasn't sure if it was from the kiss or her condition. It was probably due to the confusion that her lips whispered, "Why?"
Julian looked at her then. He saw a glassy look take over her face and worry gnawed on his heart. "Because I like you Trinity."
She shook her head. "No."
His eyebrows furrowed intensely. "Yes," he drew out slowly, "I do. You're snarky and you like to argue with me and everything's always a question. You love music as much as I do, maybe even more. You dance like your body is going up in flames and moving to the sound of the notes around you or in your head is the only way to put out the fire."
Trinity had her head bowed and water was leaking from the corners of her eyes in fat drops. Julian put a strong, rough hand up under her chin and brought her face up until it was looking at his.
A thumb pressed intimately on her bottom lip as he continued, "And you're strong. You're so strong. You've had this big secret wrapped up inside of you this whole time, but you have never let it break you. You put on a thick facade so I won't ask questions. You smile and you laugh despite the fact that there's obviously something going on. You've got heart and soul and strength and I fucking like you, darling. A lot."
His thumb traced her quivering mouth as he spoke and dropped when she began to talk. "You wouldn't like me if you knew."
"Try me."
She glanced away from his knowing eyes and thought about the routes she could take. She didn't want to do this to him, to tell. It was her problem and hers alone. She had already burdened too many people with it. She had already brought aboard too many victims to her crashing plane.
But, she wasn't going to let him go. Trinity knew that if her brain wasn't a ticking bomb, if she didn't have only a little bit of time left, Julian would be it. She didn't want him to walk away. Would he stay if she told him? Would he stay even if she didn't?
She didn't know.
Julian could sense the turmoil taking over the pretty girls body. So he did the only thing he could think of. He kissed her again.
It was small and soft, but it got his feelings across. "I'm here, Trinity. I am here."
She nodded against him, wiping frantically at her eyes. She made her decision. "Okay. Okay, but I can't tell you here. Can you come over again?"
Julian thought about it. "My mom and her husband aren't here for the weekend. Come over to my house? You still have clothes in your bag, right?"
She agreed. On the drive over she texted her mom to say she was staying an extra night at Sky's and texted Sky asking to cover for her. Her parents were lenient, but staying at a boys house with no supervision was a line even they wouldn't cross.
They pulled up to Julian's house and it was a comfortable looking two story. She could see that him mom had obviously been apart of doing up the outside, seeing as there was a rosy trim around the windows and flowers littering the lawn.
Trinity was too consumed with looking at the house that she didn't notice Julian was already halfway out the car, looking back at her. "Come on."
They made it inside, but instead of going upstairs like she thought they would, he lead her towards the kitchen. He opened a door off to the side of the pantry to show a flight of stairs leading to the basement.
"Please don't be an axe murderer."
"Shut up."
He flicked on a light to show a massive room equipped with a bed, two couches, a tv and way too many guitars. He continued down the stairs and spoke as Trinity followed him. "Apparently "daddy" thought I made too much noise and moved my room down here. Dumb on his part since its basically like my own apartment. I like it better than my old room upstairs."
"Awesome."
Nerves were taking over Trinity's body. She maneuvered the rest of the way down the stairs and moved over to one of the couches. Julian fell next to her and grabbed her hands tightly in his.
This fingers ran gently over the pulse jumping in her wrists. She tried to calm her breathing to no avail. There wasn't going to be any chilling out right now, she just had to come out and say it. "I'm dying."
His fingers stopped.
"What?"
"I've got a brain tumor," she began shakily, watching her lap intensely. "I've forgotten all the technical details at this point, but the main thing is that it's rare, there's no treatment and it's inoperable. About a month and a half ago, the doctor said I've got until graduation. Maybe."
Nobody spoke and it sounded like nobody was breathing. Trinity couldn't take it and moved her head up to see a sight that tore her hearts to bits.
Julian's eyes were screwed shut, but it wasn't doing much to stop the steady flow of sadness pouring form his eyes. His throat was moving up in down from the swallows he was making to keep the noises of despair from erupting out of his mouth.
He cracked his mouth open to say, "You're wrong."
Trinity was confused. "I wish, but the doctors made sure of the diagnosis."
He was already shaking his head. " Not about that. You're wrong. I still like you."
For the first time, instead of Julian making the first move, it was Trinity. She reached out to yank his lips closer.
And she kissed him.
She kissed him through the tears, through the obvious pain they were feeling. She kissed him through all the words she wanted to say and feelings she wanted to get out.
She just kissed him because, "I like you too, baby boy."
Once their faces were dry and emotions were settled, the two teenagers cuddled up on Julian's bed with one of his acoustics. He was trying to teach her a few basic chords.
"Put your pinkie there - no, not there. There. Good. Strum. W-wait! Too hard, do it softly."
She was starting to get the hang of it, but she wasn't so into playing music. She's much rather it be Julian with the guitar.
She glanced up at him with big eyes, "Sing for me?
He sighed, removing the guitar strap from around her body and moving the instrument into his lap. "Any requests?"
"Surprise me."
He gazed at nothing for a second, contemplating. Light flooded his eyes and he started to move his fingers.
I can hear her heart beat for a thousand miles
And the heavens open every time she smiles
And when I come to her that's where I belong
Yet I'm running to her like a river's song
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
Trinity smiled in recognition at the old song.
She's got a fine sense of humor when I'm feeling low down
And when I come to her when the sun goes down
Take away my trouble, take away my grief
Take away my heartache, in the night like a thief
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
Julian was focused on playing the song and singing it well, so he didn't see the look crossing Trinity's face. Realization was dawning on her.
Yes I need her in the daytime
Yes I need her in the night
Yes I want to throw my arms around her
Kiss her hug her kiss her hug her tight
And when I'm returning from so far away
She gives me some sweet lovin' brighten up my day
Yes it makes me righteous, yes it makes me feel whole
Yes it makes me mellow down in to my soul
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
The song came to an end and Trinity wasn't the only one beginning to understand the feelings running through her veins. Julian hadn't ever felt so right around somebody before. He lifted his eyes to meet hers.
The love they were only beginning to discover for each other was prominent in both of their gazes.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Two chapters in two days, woohoo!
That usually means it will be a little while until the next one. Schools over in a month, and I've got exams up the ass to study for so be patient with me please.
Song:
-Crazy Love//Van Morrison
Enjoy!
-Alyssa xx