Present: Goddess POV
I would say that I was going about my evening as normal but I would be lying if I said I wasn't checking my phone every 10mins. Anticipation, it really is a pain in the ass. I told myself to get over it. Getting all hype over a guy was so like me and I hated it. I guess that's why I never saw how everything could go to hell in an instant. Leaving me stumped on why I have such hideous results when it come to guys.
Forcing myself to forget about Tray, I went about my normal depressing routine. I showered, ate, and started writing while listening to some music.
Torture is what I call you.
You give me hope.
Just so you can take it away.
Then I won't be able to cope
Coping with the pain in my chest.
Why do you interfere?
Why mess that up for me?
Why give me even more fears.
Fearing that I will want you
Wanting becoming needing
Needing becoming loving
Loving becoming bleeding.
I almost bled out but
Will you be the death of me
Will you en.....
I feel my phone vibrate. I look at it annoyed. Why does my heart want it to be Tray so bad. So reluctantly I check it only to feel excitement blossom in my chest cutting off my air supply. Death caused by excitement will be such a drag.
"Tray, you are loaded gun waiting to be fired upon my heart." I said to myself. Sitting up, we began to text.
Tray: Hey
Me: Hey
Tray: So, wyd mini g
Me: Nun hbu
Tray: Bored
Tray: So....... you wannna get otp
Me: U must want to talk about school work
Tray: Not at the moment.
Me: Oh
Tray: So is that a yes, mini g.
Me: If you really want too
Tray: You must don't want to talk
Me: no
Tray: oh well
Next thing I know, he is calling. I can't breathe God I'm going to die where I lay. He really just called me. Even after I said no but I can't lie and say that happiness wasn't just born inside of me. I guess it's unavoidable. So I pick up with a swollen throat and a wounded pride. I said hey feeling so ashamed of the sound of my squeaky voice.
"It's nice to hear your voice again." He said smoothly.
"I bet" I said dryly.
"Hmm, you don't have to be like that. It's been a year now. I'm just waiting for you to get use to this mini g." I think being honest with him is best.
" I'm just wondering what you want from me." I said trying to get a firm hold on my voice. " Why do you even want to be on the phone with me. "
"Why wouldn't I want to be?"
"Honestly I hate when someone answer a question with a question. " He laughs and I crack a small smile. "I guess I will let you slide tonight. " He laughs again and I realize I like the sound of that little joy that's flowing through my phone.
"Well I can say one of the reasons is because you make me laugh. Will that satisfy you? " And before I could filter my thoughts into something dry, I said.
" Not really. You know that hanging up would be a good start." This is what I call sarcasm.
" No I think me staying on will be better." His nonchalant attitude towards my sarcasm pisses me off.
"Okayyyyyyy. " Feeling as though my negativity won't be able to run him off. He started laughing again. So we started to talk. He's been real reluctant about getting to know me. I just wanted my heart back. So I could lock it up where it would be safe.
I don't know when but we both fell asleep on the phone together. Knowing that I sleep talk or snore at times scared me. He insisted we stay on the phone all night since I never let us. I said hell no. But, he refused to let me get off, threatening to come over to my house since he is my neighbor. Its sucks that he moved right beside my house this summer. And I needed my sleep. So I chose to endure the embarrassment of letting him experience that sort of torture.