When I first got to this place I thought nobody would welcome me, and that I'd never have somebody that would care for me, thought I'd never have a real that place I belonged.
Boy was I wrong, Stoic Falls became my home. It's the first place that I've ever felt welcome. As a 22 year old woman, my life shouldn't be something that interests many people.
I've failed in life, I'm a college drop out, who ran away from an arranged marriage, with the richest man in the states.
Coltyn Maveryk the man I was supposed to marry,
And the sad part is that for the longest time, I actually loved him. Who am I kidding there's a huge difference between love, and infatuation.
I was just a child then, I didn't know anything.
I thought that because he looked at me genuinely, and kindly. Instead of what I was used to from my father; Cold stare, full of nothing but either disappointment or hope, and I was so stupid... I thought that Coltyn actually had some sort of feelings for me, outside of what was forced on him.
But.. in the end I let my father down, I let the little bit of my family I had left down... I missed the old days when he treated me like his daughter and not his slave made of clay, that he'd turn into his money making rag doll.
I despise my father. I mean of course I still love him... at least the idea of him. The memory of him.. of who he was. But who he was doesn't matter, it's because of who he is now that I ran away.
I can't believe he thought he could force me into a marriage, a fricking marriage. Most people would worry about your kid getting a good education, going to college, meeting the love of his\her life, getting married, having kids, growing old together.
The perfect love story.
But no, my prayers were never answered. My dad was instead, obsessed with me meeting important people, with... well.. important sons.
After Mom left he changed, he was a different person. And I know change is good. If I didn't think that, than that would make me a hypocrite. I changed all of our lives on mere impulse.
I couldn't marry him. Not after the things he had said to me...
But that's a story for another time, I don't have time to relive the past. I'm no longer that helpless girl, in that cold, and lonely world. I left. I'm free to be who I want to be, who I was supposed to be.
So now I need to get to my job, the current most important thing in my life. I take care of kids. No not like a babysitter, also no, I don't work at an orphanage or anything like that. - It's a place for the depressed, weak, abused, and socially awkward kids, who just can't seem to fit in.
It's a free place (with the exception of paying for food, and games. But nothing's too expensive.) for kids to hang out with each other, it's a place for them to be real, for them to be themselves and to embrace what that means, to embrace who they are.
There's counselors there at all times to help the kids, and to be that person that they're supposed to have. That person that they're supposed to be able to talk to, the best friend they never had. The best friend I never had, the best friend I SHOULD have had... I'm not gonna bring that up right now though.
Every once in awhile I'll get calls from this kid I work with Alec at 4:00 in the morning and I'll stay up till 8:00 just listening to everything he's going through, giving him the space he needs so he doesn't clam up and not tell me anything, but also being close enough to him so that he knows I care, and that I'm listening,
He's an amazing kid, and will be 18 soon. The Club is not limited to kids only, you'll occasionally see 40+ year old people in there just talking to some of the other counselors there.
Why limit The Club to only kids? Do you seriously, honestly believe that a kid going through depression is just going to be over it once he's 18? He's just gonna suddenly fit into the college life? The college life that was probably forced on him... with everything going on in the world these days we need a place like The Club.
It's so many people's escape, and everybody needs a place that they can escape to. A safe haven.
I brush my long brown hair all the way through down my back and past my belly button. I apply some dark lipstick to my plump lips. And I add one last coat of mascara to my eyelashes, examining my dark, sea blue eyes, and blinking once or twice to help them dry quicker.
I sit back in my chair and look at my face in the mirror, I take in my supposedly 'innocent' eyes, possibly the only 'pretty' part about me.. it's not that I'm ugly, its that I'm plain.
'There you go again Rowenna always beating yourself up." My mind whispered to myself.
My full name is Rowenna Quentyn Litchfield but my nickname is Rowen. Yes I know my name is weird, I have a weird family. They thought it was interesting, and thoughtful to name me after my mothers, grandmothers, grandmother. So that's what they did, they named me Rowenna Quentyn. The Quentyn part comes from my dads side.
I slip my flats on, grab my keys, and my purse and run out the door, pressing the unlock button on my key so I can get into my car.
I get in the car and put the key in the ignition, and turn it to the right, feeling the car rev up as the engine starts. I wait a couple seconds for the heat to start working, as it's the middle of January here in Stoic Falls, it's freezing.
Once it warms up I turn on the radio, and a song comes on. A Justin Bieber song. It's not that I have anything against the song, or the person really.. it's just not the kind of music I'm into.
I change the station and a song by 'Royal Blood' comes on, finally my kind of music..
"I ONLY LIE WHEN I LOVE YAAAAA!!" I practically screamed the lyrics.. I love that song.. maybe (Definitely.) too much.
When the song finally ends I listen to some commercials,
"Pizza Hut has the best pizza for you, order now 1-800-blah blah blah blah blah..."
I tune it out until finally, I get to The Club...
I get out of the car, grab my purse stuffing my keys into it and run in, I looked down to my wrist and saw my watch...
I was late.
And I had to babysit the younger kids, the kids ages here range anywhere here from, 5th grade to 12th.. and they stay as adults too, with the exception of maybe helping out at events.. which normally from my experience was just helping clean up after events, depending on the person supplying food, so yeah. Nothing here was really that bad.
It's also gamer Heaven. We have different consoles from everywhere, and a separate room with an arcade in it.. it's ¢25 for like every game anyway, there's no such thing as something unaffordable because even if you didn't have money, most of the kids who did would offer to share already.
This was the kind environment that we're trying to create, a place for kids to be at peace with the world, there's no bullies here, and if there is they'll be kindly escorted off of the premises.
And no I don't mean like, "Oh that kid looked at me."
I'm sorry but even if that kids motives did involve bullying, we can't ban them from The Club for something like that.
We remove bullies, not 'pickers', and anyone who gets picked on knows what a picker is.
Anyway I should probably stop talking, and start working.