A/N: So Mad!!!! I finished this chapter like a day ago and I guess it didn't save so I lost more than half of it and I was almost done!!!!!! Ugh! Sorry for the late update! --- Also the adrenaline that Mira gets takes away her pain so she ends up acting normal in a way until it wears off. Still mad that the original chapter didn't save though.... I also keep forgetting that Mira is the height of a Dwarf... Oh well
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I hold back a whimper and place a paw over my snout, trying to calm down. The chains tighten around my limbs as I try to move but being near Thorin, is too much. He's out of my line of sight but we're still stuck in the cell and me being in my wolf form, it's pretty cramped. I wonder what he's thinking about. He hasn't spoken since... My heart tightens at the thought and I let my exhausted body go limp. What am I supposed to do now?
Soft footsteps near our cell and sets of keys jingle as they walk. The bars creak upon being open and the new presence clears their throat. I slowly turn my head and stare at one of the guards, glaring at Thorin and turning to me nervously. Tauriel comes up behind him, to my surprise and eyes us suspiciously before quickly nodding. Thorin steps closer but she immediately draws her weapon, pointing it at his throat. There is no protective pull this time but I silently whimper, still trying to make him back off. He glances at me for a second then finally retreats back to the wall, arms crossed. Tauriel approaches cautiously, keys in hand and kneels while taking hold of my large paws. I grunt at the contact but the shackles are soon removed, allowing me to get up slowly. I shake my body in satisfaction to rid the layer of dirt coating me and stare at her in question.
"I will lead you to your chambers." Hearing the Elvish tongue makes me flinch slightly but I nod, doing my best to ignore Thorin's stare and follow them out of the cell. The bars close once I exit and the sound bounces off the walls, taunting me.
A few hushed whispers catch my attention as I trail behind and I lower my head in shame. They're all judging me again aren't they? Just like the beginning. They definitely heard our leaders recent outburst, he was practically roaring with hatred. I bet they're not too happy about my parentage either. But do they know the truth about my mom? No. They would be having a different reaction if that were the case. We walk down a long stairway, getting farther away from the Dwarves but each step, proceeds to increase the ache in my body. There isn't really a way to describe it. The only thing I can say, is that those long years of torture from Azog, could never compare to this.
"I will take it from here." Tauriel turns toward the guard, giving him a stern yet threatening gaze. He nods and swiftly moves to the opposite direction, going down a set of stairs. I keep my head down, not wanting to see the emotion in her stare and wait for us to continue. "Come. We must clean you up." Her voice is gentle, just like I remember but I can't help but feel she pities me.
Something dark stirs in my stomach, making me want to hurl it out due to the anguish. It eats at my stomach and leads up to the rest of my body, sending painful sensations. Not again. Things become blurry for a moment and my body stumbles to the side, leaning against the wall. I let out a shaky breath, close to losing myself completely.
"What has happened to you?" Tauriel gasps and kneels down to my level, searching my eyes for an answer. I whimper and pull out of her grasp roughly, almost falling again, "should I go get your brother?"
I shake my head with a huff, shutting my eyes and trying to recover. If he sees me like this then he'll go straight for Thorin. True, this is his fault but he didn't know this would happen. Although... Some of the Dwarves do know what I'm currently going through. That's if they were actually paying attention during that discussion in Rivendell. Another hand touches my side and I freeze, staring at Tauriel who is a few feet away from me. She does not react and simply stands, straightening out her clothing and proceeding down the corridor. The touch is soft and familiar but my senses are too dulled to catch a scent. My head gazes to the side towards the stranger but I find nothing there, a simple wall. Is this just me hallucinating? I shiver when their contact rushes up to my ears and they scratch it softly. A calm, determined voice comes from the shadows and I wish I could feel something upon knowing he's alright.
"I'll get them out of here." Bilbo whispers and his hand is suddenly gone, along with his presence. He's getting them out? But how? Tauriel clears her throat from down the hall and gestures to a large door. I make my way over to her location and enter the room quickly. What kind of magic is he using to perform such trickery?
--
If I thought the affects in my wolf form were bad, then this is ten times worse. That was nothing, a simple pinch, I realize that now. When I shifted back to normal, I felt everything all at once. The nausea, anger, sadness, betrayal, fear and other things mixed in. Then all the voices started to roar in my head, screaming constantly. I had fallen to the floor immediately in shock and when I tried crying for help, I started shaking. It wasn't too much but enough for me to wish for death. My body was trembling and I was completely powerless. If Tauriel didn't enter when she did, I probably would still be living in that hell. But it's not like it all went away... She was just able to 'bring me back to reality' I suppose. I was lucky enough to dodge all her questions but I no longer have an excuse to stay quiet.
We weren't able to talk alone for long, since Legolas barged in to see how I was doing. I expected him to hold some type of grudge for me leaving but I saw none of that. Father must've told him what had happened and probably blames him for it. They never did have a close relationship. Honestly, before I got banished, Thranduil was always close to me. Although, Legolas can be a total ass sometimes but he's caring when it comes to Tauriel and I. We may be half siblings but he's still family none the less. If only things were like how they used to be. I'm having to fake these emotions, just so that they won't worry or possibly harm anyone. It only makes the guilt even worse. But I can't let them know that I'm literally dying inside. It's not like anyone here is an expert on Skin-Changers. If I were to share my problems, then I might just become under the influence of many types of herbs. Definitely don't want that.
They shared many stories of the years I missed out on and asked a lot of questions. I wasn't really paying attention but had to play along and force a smile, which hurt greatly. Tauriel must've noticed my act since she kept frowning a lot and constantly asking about my health. Legolas is however, dull when it came to certain emotions. If only his heart was as big as his pride. Moments later, one of the guards came in, saying that Thranduil wished to speak with me. I was somewhat relieved since I finally had time to be alone, even if it's for a short while. Tauriel requested to be my escort but I politely shot down her request. She already saw too much of what's happening to me.
I sigh and lean against the wall, clutching my side in pain while panting. Why did his throne have to be so far? I stumble at the growing sickness and cover my mouth. Just as I'm about to give up, yells from guards echo throughout the halls. Dozens of them rush by, each armed with different weapons and shouting phrases I'm unable to focus on. My eyes naturally follow them until they turn a corner, heading straight to one of the river entrances. What's going on? I push off the stone as adrenaline pumps through my veins, causing the ache to become more bearable. Interesting.
"Mira!" Legolas sprints to my side, out of breath with his bow in hand, "you should not be here." He glances over my shoulder nervously, not bothering to act like things are ok.
I arch a brow at his odd behavior, "What's going on?" More guards pass by, carrying even more weapons this time. Curiosity causes my body to move on its own but I'm pulled back harshly by the arm, "Hey!"
"You are in no condition to fight!" Legolas groans, clearly becoming more impatient and tightens his hold when I begin to struggle. "I don't have time for this!"
I scoff at his statement and send him a glare, "Then give me a weapon or else I'll go out there and shift!" I yank my arm away from his grip, beginning to feel anger build up. "Choose. Times wasting." He peers down at his feet for a moment, then reaches behind his back, shoving a sword into my hands.
"Try to keep up." With that said he pushes past, bumping into my shoulder. I chuckle at his actions and chase after him, coming close to his side.
We take a sharp turn toward one of the smaller balconies, that's basically a shortcut to the rivers gate. Soon enough, the light of day comes into view and I smile, missing the suns warmth and the fresh scent of grass. Horrid creatures reveal themselves as we get closer, ruining my peaceful memory and I growl lowly. Orcs. Two of them take notice of our form and Legolas quickly fires his bow, shooting them both in the head. They tumble down the small hill and I'm quite impressed with his development in archery.
"What are they doing here?!"
Legolas ignores my question and we jump off the ledge in sync. I grunt as my feet land hard on the ground but I shake it off and focus on the Orcs surrounding us. Arrows fly all around, hitting their targets and I smirk, now he's just showing off. A sword comes to my left and I immediately step back to dodge it. The Orc snarls and swings again, aiming lower this time. I block his hit with my weapon and kick him in the stomach, sending him into the water. Yells of distress come from further down the path and I dart towards it, jumping through the bushes. Legolas shouts my name and joins my side, taking out the creatures before I can even react.
"I could've handled it." I frown once he chuckles and continue onward along the large rocks. The path is clear thanks to Legolas killing every Orc that comes close. But something still doesn't feel right. I stop and breathe in deeply, observing the area when a shout catches my attention. My eyes widen as I see members from the Company float by in barrels, gasping for air. They're like sitting ducks! I growl when Orcs come from the opposite side, closer to the Dwarves and reaching out to them.
How did they even get here? Without much thought, I charge forward, leaping over the rocks while trying to find a way across. Their close to approaching the main gate but when they give the signal- a horn sounds in the distance and the steel bars begin to close. How great. An Orc suddenly lands in front of me and I barely miss the blade of his axe. I take a few steps back from the larger foe and grip the handle oh my sword with both hands. Something past him catches my attention and I lose focus for a moment, shocked to see all the Dwarves stuck with Orcs. The one in front of me shrieks and I leap back, feeling the blade graze my torso due to my carelessness. Damn.
I glance up for a split second, seeing a low branch above me just enough for my reach. The Orc stomps forward while I move back, trying to plan my next approach. As soon as he breaks into a charge, I jump up, dropping my blade and use the branch to kick the Orc back. The force takes him off guard and he stumbles, losing his only weapon and landing on his back. I drop back down to the ground and sprint, kneeling to grab my sword and plunge it into his head. However, I do not stop to retrieve it and continue running, eyes on the Dwarves and the enemies surrounding them. A large arrow zooms past my face and I fall back onto my rear, startled and panting. It's planted deep into the tree, exactly where my head would've been. I sharply turn to my right, searching for the archer and freeze once I meet his cold stare. Bolg gives me a smirk and puts another arrow in his Morgul bow, aiming it elsewhere. Why isn't he trying to kill me?
"Kili!"
I freeze and peer back at the Dwarves in shock. Kili falls to the ground before he's able to reach the lever, with the arrow deep in his leg and he clutches it tightly. I let out a shaky breath, remembering how much agony I've seen it inflict on those around me. An Orc suddenly appears over the gate, setting his sights on the fallen archer. The Dwarf tries to scoot back but it only causes more blood to escape his wound.
The Orc shrieks as an arrow pierces its head, causing him to land on the small herd of Dwarves below. I sigh in relief at the sight of Tauriel, handling things exceptionally. Her movements are more focused on protecting the young archer, giving him time to open the small gate.
"Are you just going to sit there all day?" Legolas jumps down from the tree next to me, landing and killing an Orc in the process. "Times wasting." He smirks and holds his hand out.
I grasp it firmly, getting up from the ground with a nod and eye the Dwarves. They all fall down the small waterfall while shouting wildly, going further down the river. I sigh, Bilbo is smart but I never thought he would be this crazy. Tauriel darts past us, maneuvering over all the bodies and over the stone wall. She's really motivated about something and I doubt it's killing Orcs. I push the thoughts away and follow her lead, grabbing one of the discarded axes as I run by.
I do my best to focus on the Company as well as the current path I'm taking. Almost all the Orcs are chasing them from the other side, getting awfully close to the ledge. Bilbo's soaking form emerges from behind one of the barrels and we lock eyes for a moment. At this rate he'll end up drowning.
"Mira!" He shouts, waving frantically while trying to hold onto the side of the barrel, "behind you!"
At his warning I pounce onto one of the higher boulders, grip the axe firmly and spin around. The Orcs flies in that direction with my weapon stick in its torso, almost slicing him completely. With a huff I turn back on course, barely noticing that Legolas somehow made it to the other side.
"Mira!" Hearing Dwalin's war cry nearly breaks my concentration and I avert my gaze to him. The water causes his barrel to thrash around violently but somehow, he's able to throw a sword my way.
I catch it swiftly, thankful for his aid and continue sprinting through all the obstacles. A large shadow suddenly looms over me but then passes over some debris. There's a large crack and Orcs squeal frantically ahead. I climb the stones easily but yelp and duck when an axe comes close to my face. Bombur, who is partially stuck in his barrel, fights off the creatures coming from all directions. It's an amusing sight to see but one to be laughed about later on. He spins in circles, knocking some away and in my direction. I grunt as some pushes back into me but slice their necks quickly.
Dark blood splatters all over my face with every decapitation as I help defend the larger Dwarf. The Orcs are no longer surrounding him and the rest of the Company rush by. Bombur shouts my name and tosses the axe over to me while landing back into his barrel. I hold both weapons tightly and pounce along the rocks, Tauriel and Legolas now close behind. They all fall down the small waterfall, going under the water and rising back up soon after. I scan them all quickly to make sure they're ok and hop onto the thick branches one by one. Legolas flies past, landing on Dwalin and Dori's head for balance while shooting down the Orcs. They're definitely going to remember that.
I take one final leap and land back onto the ground, sprinting shortly after. Tauriel comes next to me and searches around for any danger. A sudden urge of pain hits my stomach and I let out a startled cry, stopping to clutch it tightly. Why must this happen now?! I wave Tauriel off when she begins to come back toward me and force myself to move forward. She leaps over a few branches and makes her way to the other side, helping Legolas. My pace has slowed greatly and cold sweat forms on my brow. The powerful burn in my lungs feels as though they're so close to collapsing.
Things go blurry for a second and when I regain vision, I realize that the trail has come to an end. I dig my feet into the dirt to stop myself and slice down an Orc, glancing back at the river. A few of them pass by, away from our borders so I'm unable to follow.
"Mira!" A familiar voice with an accent shouts, "jump!" Bofur extends his arms out, signaling for me to join him.
I take a step forward, ready to leap but then a voice in my head stops my movement. Thorin doesn't want you. He rejected you. I take in a deep breath at those words and remember the truth. I'm not welcome in his company. I shake my head slowly, tears threatening to spill and step away. Bofur frowns and shouts my name again, trying to convince me to go. His voice soon grows distant as the water takes him away but the sorrow in his tone, can still be heard. I sigh, about to take my leave when blue eyes meet mine. The air within me vanishes and everything becomes so cold. No matter how much I want to look away, my body refuses to listen. Thorin stares at me with an emotionless face as he drifts off and my heart tightens. This is our goodbye.
"You didn't go with them?" Legolas stands next to me, staring at them with some uncertainty in his voice. Thorin leaves my vision and a tear rolls down my cheek.
I turn around, wiping my eyes while trying to come up with an answer. How am I supposed to tell him? I suppose it doesn't matter now. Thorin's gone. He's gone forever. Tauriel approaches us slowly and gives me a saddened look one in which I ignore. With a sigh I trudge back the way we came, passing all the bodies of both Elves and Orcs. I bite my lip and stare at each one of our fallen, feeling regret pull at my heart strings. I wish Bolg didn't miss his shot.