Not in my Job Description - A...

By AmberLynn00

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Revised versions of the Avery Clavens Books are available for free on Smashwords. Avery Clavens is an average... More

Author's Note - The voices in my head told me to write this
Chapter 1 - What are friends for? Really please tell me because I have no clue
Chapter 2 - Nothing like a little blood on the ice
Chapter 3 - Welcome to the Twilight Zone admission is a buck fifty
Chapter 4 - The shirt says it all, Bite me
Chapter 5 - Welcome to Satan's bedroom
Chapter 6 - What a coinkydink
Chapter 7 - Shirt says Dear math should be Dear anybody solve your own problems
Chapter 8 - What kind of spy doesn't know spy talk?
Chapter 9 - Wow a real life crime scene. Can I bring popcorn?
Chapter 10 - Putting around
Chapter 11 - Some days it is better to stay in bed
Chapter 12 - Okay really, why did I get out of bed?
Chapter 13 - Push me, shove you, Oh yeah? Says who?
Chapter 14 - Meet me in the freezer section
Chapter 15 - Someone's in the kitchen with Dinah
Chapter 16 - Everything is better with donuts
Chapter 17 - Eel the white meat that should stay in the ocean
Chapter 18 - When pigs fly
Chapter 19 - Just a little black dress
Chapter 20 - Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Chapter 21 - Water, water, everywhere, but not a drop to drink
Chapter 22 - The human lie detector, that's me...Yeah right
Chapter 24 - When nothing goes right, go left
Chapter 25 - Smile...it confuses people
Chapter 26 - Motherly instincts for sale, only fifty cents. Act now!
Chapter 27 - On a NY subway you get fined for spitting but it's free to throw up
Chapter 28 - Only the good die young
Chapter 29 - If I wanted to hear your opinion, I would remove the duct tape
Afterword - The place I try to make sense of all my ramblings

Chapter 23 - Showing up with a knife to a gun fight is a bad idea

298 10 0
By AmberLynn00

The way my life had been going, I should’ve expected the situation standing in front of me. I didn’t have time to be scared, or really gather any thoughts together at all. I took a deep breath and studied my opponent. Finding any weaknesses quickly was a better use of my time than throwing a fit.

With bronze colored skin, Olaf Schwartz towered over the frightened woman in his clutches. If someone was to ask me, I wouldn’t peg Julie as a high schooler; she looked closer to my age. Olaf was dressed impeccably in a shiny gray suit. He had beady black eyes and hair that was probably black, but it was hard to tell in the limited lighting.

To me he looked like the epitome of a bad guy. I could see him tying damsels in distress on train tracks and laughing sinisterly as he waited for a train to arrive on the scene.

“Mr. Schwartz, I’ve heard so much about you in recent days,” I said, still trying to decide what options we had. I assumed Jimmy and his sister weren’t packing any weapons, so we had my three knives against his at least one gun. Odds weren’t in our favor.

That didn’t take into account whether he had backup on the way. With presumably all the law enforcement in the general vicinity gathered in one location, I didn’t think we’d see any backup for our side. The pressure of it being up to me to solve the situation weighed heavily on my shoulders.

“I see you know who I am. That can only mean you’re with some government organization, Avery. I’ve been listening to some interesting conversations tonight while we’ve been driving around. I’m sad I didn’t take over the driving duties until after you arrived at the ball.

“If I’d have thought of the idea sooner, I might have been able to warn my friends at the docks. Sadly, I’m afraid they’re going to be captured and my shipment taken away from me. I, on the other hand, refuse to be caught, so I’m going to take you three as an insurance policy,” he replied, sounding a lot surer of his plan than anything I could come up with.

“Mr. Schwartz, please just let them go. I know that isn’t something in your code, but you don’t need them. I’ll go with you as a hostage if you release the others,” I said.

I’d be going with him if he didn’t release the others, but I could at least try to take them out of the picture. Without them, Olaf couldn’t use us against each other. Plus, I’d feel a lot better in a one-on-one fight.

“Have you forgotten so soon that I’ve been listening while we’ve been driving around? Now, no one mentioned any specific skills you have, but you and that other agent talked about killing, so I figure you have some kind of experience. I think I’ll keep you all together for now. When we get to the airport, there’s a chance I’ll let you all go, but not until I’m safely on my plane out of here. Now get in the car.”

He tilted his head in the direction of the car, but didn’t make any other moves. My bull detector was pegging, so I knew he had no intention of letting us go alive. After ruining all his big plans for his guns, I expected he wanted some kind of retribution and we were more than likely going to be the first casualties.

He had the upper hand, at that moment, and even though I knew you weren’t supposed to get in the car with psychopathic killers, I didn’t see a lot of choices. I was grateful there were no other sightseers out wandering, giving him more sheep to slaughter. Moving would hopefully ensure things stayed that way.

“Okay, we’ll go with you.”

The entire time Olaf and I conversed, Jimmy hadn’t stopped staring at his sister and I wasn’t sure he’d been aware of the conversation going on around him. Much like me making it clear I was a horrible spy, it was evident he wasn’t more than a bystander roped into doing business with the Schwarz’s. I highly doubted Olaf would be rendered speechless if his sister was in the clutches of a homicidal maniac.

“Can the siblings at least sit in the back together? Jimmy has been very worried about her and I’m afraid he might try something stupid if he’s separated from her again. I’m well aware stupid moves can get people killed, and I’m trying to prevent that.”

“I can live with that. Leave your little purse behind, though, because you’re sitting up front with me. The dress doesn’t leave much to the imagination, so I don’t think you have any weapons on your person, but I don’t know what you have in your bag.”

He led Jimmy’s sister to the back of the car and opened the door to push her in. I was just happy Olaf underestimated my ability to hide weapons under a see-through dress. Being allowed to keep my weapons, gave me a tiny morsel of hope.

Once we were all situated in the limo, we headed down the road. Olaf had his gun in his lap, pointed at me with a finger on the trigger. Anything I planned to do would have to be quick and catch him by surprise.

With the dress, only one of my knives was easily accessible. Cutting access slots in the dress hadn’t seemed like a priority, but at least I’d thought ahead and worn one sheath in an alternative location.

The question was when to use it. It was only a two-inch blade that I’d taped to the one-inch thick piece of fabric like material that ran from my ankle to my heel on the back of my right shoe. With the blade that small, I’d really have to make it count.

If I could distract him enough with the baby knife, making a move for one of my bigger blades would be easier. Getting him decommissioned with just the small blade would be even better, but I’d never been a huge optimist.

I moved myself a little, so my right foot was up on the door frame, closer to my hand. I kept my movements small, and watched Olaf to make sure he didn’t notice. Wanting to buy some more time, to put finishing touches on my brilliant ideas, I decided to try to get Olaf talking.

“So Olaf, what exactly were you planning to do with all those weapons?” I asked.

“Sorry, Avery, but I don’t think I know you well enough to go into my master plan. You may have your two fellas wrapped around your finger, but you’ll find I’m not as taken by the fairer sex as they are. To get where I am, I’ve had to be ruthless and no little girl is going to stop me from getting what I want.”

All right, being friendly didn’t work and he needed to be knocked down a peg or two, so I switched to taunting. Probably not the brightest move in the situation, but chances were good I’d be dead within the hour. Living like I had nothing to lose had to come with some perks.

“Too quickly you forget, Olaf. I believe I’ve kept you from picking up a very large load of weapons this very evening. That really has to sting. A little girl like me was able to find out the plans and tell the authorities.”

“I really don’t think you had anything to do with that. Some people just have big mouths and you happened to be there to listen. It could’ve been anyone, you aren’t all that special. I’m sorry if someone told you that you were, but you’re just another pretty face in the crowd.”

I was happy we were pulling into the airport, because much longer with the guy and I would’ve figured out a way to kill myself, just to get away from his pompous personality. He drove us to an empty runway, where I imagined he had a private jet or something nearby.

“Okay,” he started, and I prepared myself for more of his obnoxious words, “I’ll be getting out and walking across the front of the car over to your side. You’re not going try anything funny, do you understand? I’ll open your door and I don’t want you charging me. That will just get you killed faster.”

“I understand perfectly and will eagerly await your next order, Olaf.” He seemed to like women who know their place, so I went along with the role, even though I was likely to break out in hives from the act.

He opened the door and exited, pointing the gun at me the entire time. I would’ve loved it if he’d forgotten to load it or someone loaded it with blanks. I didn’t think either of those options were a possibility, but I could dream.

Once he was in front of the car, I shifted my hand to my ankle, while giving no movement away with my upper body. I quickly retrieved the knife and readied for my attack.

If Olaf had been kind enough to roll down the windows, I would’ve felt better. It wasn’t like I would’ve yelled out the window with a gun pointed at me. I did have a little common sense. With the windows down, I could’ve just thrown the little blade at him while he was away from the vehicle, giving me time to get its bigger brothers out.

Olaf arrived at my door and opened it, staying far enough away to prevent me from rushing him. I got out and he had me lead him to the back. I carefully held my hand in a way so he wouldn’t notice the knife between my pointer and middle fingers. Thankfully the blade was black and not shiny. I was instructed to open the door when we made it to the rear of the car.

“Okay, you two come out of there nice and slow,” he instructed.

I should’ve tried to attack before Jimmy and Julie were back in the picture, but the time hadn’t seemed right. With a gun to the back of my head, timing was everything.

Jimmy slowly edged his way out and his sister followed. “Now, you three move away from the car and face me.”

As good little robots, we did as we were instructed. Behind Olaf I saw a person walking towards us. Since the location was his choosing, I expected it was one of his goons, so my time was running out.  

I repositioned the knife to hold it by the tip of the blade with my fingertips. I, then as quickly as possible, raised my arm up and threw the knife, aiming for his neck. At the same time, I dived to my left, shoving Jimmy and his sister to the ground to get them out of the way in case Olaf started shooting before the knife could do any damage. Jimmy curled on top of his sister to protect her.

I heard two gunshots as I worked to get my knives out from under my dress. The next time I came to a gun fight, I was going to have to remember to dress appropriately. I finally worked the knives out and stood to engage in battle with Olaf, only to see him down on the ground bleeding from a chest wound.

I looked up to the person standing above him and saw Nate looking over at me. His eyes roamed to look for any wounds, while my eyes just stared at him in confusion.

“Are you okay?” he asked, still pointing his gun at either a dead or fast on his way to dead Olaf.

“How did you get here?” I asked not bothering to answer his question.

“I drove,” he replied, stating the obvious.

“You know what I mean. How did you know where to find us?”

“You’re still wearing the broach. I never closed the channel. I wasn’t that far away when I heard what was happening. I called ahead and told them I was going after Schwartz. You were already in the limo on the way to the airport before I could get back to you, so I followed behind at a distance that wouldn’t be dangerous for you guys and worked my way over to you to rush in and save the day.”

“You know I had a perfectly good plan all mapped out and was just starting to activate ninja Avery mode.”

“I saw, and I’m very impressed with your knife throwing skills. It embedded deep into his throat, but with him firing the gun I didn’t want to take any chances he could get off more shots,” he said, moving away from the body to stand by me.

“So, is he dead?” I asked as I listened to sirens coming closer.

“Most certainly. I have to ask again, are you okay? My visual observation isn’t enough to satisfy my need for an answer to that question.”

“Of course,” I turned to Jimmy and his sister, “You guys are okay, right?”

Jimmy let his sister up and looked her over quickly. “Yes, I think we’re both in one piece. Avery, I’d like to introduce you to my sister Julie. Julie, this is Avery.”

I reached my hand out to shake hers. “It’s nice to meet you, Julie. I’ve heard a lot about you from your brother.

“Is it really over?” she asked cautiously.

I looked over at Nate and said, “I think it is. We can all get back to our lives.”

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