Chapter XXIII
I heard the army returning before I saw any of them; the low marching in the streets, slowly quieting as they made their way higher up the city, the cheers and shouts of victory and relief from loved ones' reunions, and the few mournful cries of those who had lost them.
Eventually, they began to get close enough that Eowyn and Faramir were also looking around, and then as we heard them come up the stairs we all stood simultaneously and rushed towards the door.
Faramir reached the handle first and pushed it open just as our company returned.
There was a great deal of shouting and embracing, there were no words, just exclamations of joy and relief, that we were all alright, that the Ring was destroyed, and that Sauron was gone at last, his few traces of evil left in the world now a minority.
Eventually, when I became aware of actual words again, Mireclya reached me first and slapped me - not hard, but right across the face.
"Mira!" I yelped.
"Do not do that kind of thing ever again!" She scolded firmly. "That magic, that was an absolute ridiculous thing to do, and in your condition, honestly - "
"It's good to see you, too," I responded with a smile, and she stopped talking and just sighed in relief.
"I'm glad you're okay, at any rate," she said.
And then Aragorn was there, limping slightly but with a big grin on his face. "Thank you," he said quietly in my ear as he hugged me.
"Returning the favor, for wrapping my arm, and taking the Palantír from me," I suggested lightly, returning the embrace with my left arm.
He smiled back and walked off with Mireclya, and then Merry and Pippin replaced them, leaping at me and shouting. "Elena!"
I laughed at the sight of them. "You two must've fought well," I said with a smile.
"We did!" Pippin exclaimed. "And Merry fought two at once and won!" After a pause, he then added, "I helped."
I chuckled, but Merry nodded very seriously and said, "He did."
I put my hands on their heads. "Alright, you two, go get cleaned up. I expect you're exhausted." They both grinned and shook their heads, but walked off anyways, talking excitedly.
Gimli took their place and chuckled. "Quite a gamble you took there, lass."
I smiled. "I'm alright, Gimli."
"Your bloody arm is broken!" He protested.
"That's irrelevant," I laughed. "I'm fine."
He harrumphed. "Good." He patted my left arm, unable to reach my shoulder, and walked down the hall towards the same room the rest of the Fellowship had gone into.
Eomer smiled as he passed me, and clapped my shoulder. "You and your magic."
"You're welcome," I teased, following him with my eyes. He waved a careless hand behind him as he walked to show he'd heard and that he understood that I was teasing.
I turned back around; Eowyn and Faramir appeared to have gone back into the room, and there was only one other in the hall.
"Legolas," I breathed.
He walked towards me with a smile until we were face to face. "You look worried."
"I didn't see you for a while... not since that night... and then the Palantír... and you were already gone."
His eyes twinkled. "I sat with you," he admitted, "for as long as I could. But you didn't wake. We had to leave."
I felt my face flush, and I looked down. "We never really..."
"No," Legolas agreed. "We'll talk tonight?"
"In the garden," I replied, glancing back up at him.
He looked up around the hall, his eyes darting around furtively, before he kissed me swiftly. His arms around me sent the same shivers down my spine and warm swoop in my stomach as they had last night, but it ended too soon; we were both afraid of someone finding us.
I stepped back slightly, and then frowned. "Legolas... where is Frodo, and Sam? Where is Gandalf?"
He smiled slightly. "Your shield gave him time to take the eagles up to Mount Doom. He brought the Hobbits directly to the Houses of Healing - they're in the room everyone entered."
"Are they...?" I cut myself off, not wanting to finish my sentence for fear of what the answer might be.
Legolas tilted his head. "They're unconscious... but, alive."
"There is hope, then," I murmured, dropping my head.
Legolas kissed my forehead. "Sav'estel," he said quietly. "There is always hope."
I almost laughed, immediately reminiscent of Moria, the first time I'd heard that from him, before I knew I loved him - before, I think, I even did. I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder, and appreciated that, though I was tall, he was still half a head taller than me. His solid figure was comforting.
"Come," he said quietly. I sighed, and stood up straight.
"I'm glad the war is over at last," I said, as he led me towards the room.
He nodded his agreement and replied softly, "It has been a long time since the east has been clear and calm. The absense of its darkness is refreshing and strange."
I pushed the door open softly, unsure of what I would find.
The six stood around two beds, not speaking, and Gandalf sat in front of them in an old wooden chair, his head bowed solemnly. "It will be a while yet til they wake," he said once Legolas and I had joined the group. Aragorn flickered his eyes towards me suspiciously, and I knew he saw that something was up, so I just shook my head and mouthed, Later.
"But they will wake," Eomer said hesitantly.
Gandalf chuckled. "Yes, I have no doubt that in due time, they will wake."
-
As we all left the room quietly, I gently touched Eomer's arm. "My lord... where is Theoden?"
His expression darkened and he led me just past the door so that we weren't in the way. He looked up sharply, and I stepped back hesitantly. "Theoden was killed in the battle," Eomer said quietly, his soft voice not matching his fierce expression. "Rohan is to be passed to my sister. The people will follow her eagerly." His eyes lightened slightly, but his face still held grief.
"I'm sorry, Eomer," I replied quietly. He was exactly my height, and his intense stare unnerved me. "But Eowyn will be a responsible leader, do you agree?"
Eomer nodded once, firmly, and then said hesitantly, "I do not worry about Eowyn's ability to rule over Rohan - it is her right - but I am concerned with her newfound affection with Faramir. I was actually wondering - do you know anything about that?"
I smiled humorlessly. "Eomer, would a responsible brother ask his sister's friends about her romantic interests?"
He looked down sheepishly. "Elenathrian."
I sighed, resigned. "She likes him, Eomer, she really does. And - I haven't asked, and he hasn't said anything - but I think he does as well." I paused, and added reluctantly, "They spend lots of time together."
"She is happy?" His face lit up at the thought.
"Much more than before, that is certain," I responded honestly.
Eomer smiled. "I'm glad." He clapped my shoulder lightly and made to walk off, but I called after him, "Will you not visit her?"
He shook his head wistfully. "We are not like that, I'm afraid. When we are together, we can't help but fight, but apart, we care deeply."
"You are lucky to have each other," I responded with a kind smile, and turned to walk down the hall, wanting to not be in my room.
"Thank you, Elenathrian," Eomer said from down the hall. I held a hand up to show I'd heard him.
"Any time, my lord." I walked all the way down the hall towards a corner that had a balcony overlooking as many directions as possible. I inhaled deeply, resting my arms on the railing, and looked seaward. I could only wait, perhaps, for the rest of the year, before I had to go - my arm was beginning to hurt less, but the broken bones would probably never heal exactly right, and the scar would continue to sap my energy and cause temporary blackouts as they had in the past week or so.
I had no intense magic left, no more strenght for it - I could already tell - but perhaps I could still read the stars by night, or create small tricks with minimal power. I smiled sitfully, and sighed, and as I did, I heard someone approaching behind me - footsteps I would recognize anywhere.
Still, I did not turn, instead waiting for him to address me as I was sure he would.
Aragorn, however, said nothing, and the tense air was bothering me, so I turned around, a gentle breeze ruffling my loose hair that I hadn't bothered to rebraid. "Something is on my mind, Aragorn," I admitted.
The Palantír's vision had been plaguing me ever since I'd woken up, and Faramir's words about me had gotten me thinking. If there is one thing I have learned about you, it is that you are headstrong, yet steadfast. You never fear for yourself, always doing things impulsively for those you love. The Palantír had shown me exactly that : me being the cause of destruction to everything I held dear.
"I am the one you turn to with such things," he said simply, and joined me at the railing.
"In the Palantír," I began hesitantly, and I felt him tense beside me, "what I saw was the thing I fear most. Sauron had discovered this easily."
"He was the Dark Lord," Aragorn said tersely. "His Eye saw all."
I turned my head and gently touched his arm with my broken one, and he relaxed. "Do not blame yourself," I said firmly, and Aragorn nodded slowly. I withdrew my hand. "That's not all. Faramir said something that really unsettled me. He told me that he'd learned things about me in the week we'd known each other, and his findings were alarmingly accurate."
"He guessed your fear," Aragorn guessed without question, and I nodded reluctantly.
"'If there is one thing I have learned about you, it is that you are headstrong, yet steadfast. You never fear for yourself, always doing things impulsively for those you love.' He said that, with certainty, after a week of knowing me." I turned to him, and then said what I'd been worrying about : "Am I really that simple to read, Aragorn? Could anyone look at me and immediately be able to tell that about me?" I inhaled sharply. "Is that why Sauron was able to hurt me so easily? Why, on the very first day before this whole adventure began, he'd been able to get into my head and try to kill me by showing me visions of my deepest fears?" I looked at him anxiously, not bothering to try and hide the anticipation on my face because I knew he would pick up on it anyways.
Aragorn left a long pause, however, before finally saying cautiously, "War puts everyone on their toes, Elenathrian, especially when Sauron and the One Ring were involved. I don't believe that one particularly observant man and one all-seeing dark lord during a great time of war necessarily means that you are easily readable or shallow. The Palantír just unnerved you, Elenathrian. Uuma dela. (Don't worry.) I, for one, only know you so well because I've known you my whole life. The rest of the company cannot say the same; I believe they've had trouble with you because they did not know how to approach you."
I looked at him, relieved, but he wore a very throughtful expression. "What?" I asked.
"You still look like you're hiding something from me," he answered calmly, and narrowed his eyes at me studiously.
I looked away and we stood in a comfortable silence for a while, but I could still feel his eyes on me. I felt a kind of guilt suddenly burn through me that I was hiding this from him, and felt unsettled by it. My fingers twitched involuntarily, and then I burst out, "Aragorn, I have to say something or I might explode."
My old friend raised his eyebrows and smiled a little, satisfied. "Well, we wouldn't want that."
"I - " I stopped, and glanced at him. Aragorn looked genuinely curious and slightly worried, though he wore a small smile that showed he knew what I might say. "Nányë melinyes... Legolas." I knew he had told me not say anything, but as the words left my lips, I felt an immense weight just lift from my shoulders, and I was glad I'd said something; I trusted Aragorn with my life and more. I'm in love with Legolas.
And saying out loud made it absolutely certain, and easier to tell Legolas tonight when he was sure to come and meet me in the garden like we'd said. We could sort ourselves out, finally, and determine what we would do when I eventually sailed into the west... I hid the sudden frown from my face.
I refocused my eyes and glanced at Aragorn, who was smiling softly, his eyes bright. "Tier karis, Elenathrian. You are in luck." (So does he.)
I laughed. "You knew, I know you knew since Helm's Deep." I felt suddenly giddy, like I had to go and find Legolas, but I resisted. "All the same - hannon lle, Aragorn."
Aragorn smiled. "I'm glad you can turn to me with such things," he said quietly.
"Only in return for the same friendship I give you," I responded in the same tone. I then added hesitantly, but no less honestly, "Aragorn, I am blessed to have had the opportunity to have taught you, and then even more to have become your friend long after that." I smiled. "I could not be more grateful."
His expression darkened suddenly, and he said, "This had better not be your goodbye to me."
I laughed, and pushed away the thought of having to say goodbye to Aragorn. "I will not be leaving until at least after the coronation, and that's in a few months still."
"You'd be better off staying until after the summer, as well," Aragorn said, a mischievous smile lighting up his face.
I narrowed my eyes. "Why is that?" I asked, trying to read his face. He was excited about something, that was certain.
"Tonight," he said quietly, "in front of the White Tree on the topmost level of the city - I'm going to ask Mira to marry me."
I almost cried out in excitement, and instead settled for a huge hug. I probably nearly squeezed Aragorn to death, but I didn't care. "Aragorn, I'm so glad, you're both going to be so - "
He cut me off with a grin. "I know."
I wanted to ask him so many more things - was he nervous, excited? Both, certainly. Was there a ring? What else had he planned? - but exactly what happened between the two of them wasn't really my business, and I was just grateful he'd told me before he actually asked. And I knew one thing, just from looking at his beaming smile : he was certain.
-
Upon returning to my room, feeling much less pressured and more relaxed, I found Eowyn resting and Faramir at the balcony.
He turned as I approached him quietly, not wanting to disturb Eowyn. "You look refreshed," he noted once I got close enough.
"As observant as always," I said with a slight smile.
Faramir inclined his head slightly. "A trait I learned from Boromir, in fact."
Somehow, knowing this made me feel better about what I'd told Aragorn. "I wish I remembered my sister," I admitted.
He responded with a quizzical look, and then I realized that Faramir didn't know about the years I'd spent as Oreldes. I explained briefly, giving him the short version, and his questioning look was replaced with a confused one, though he understood, now, what I meant. "My sister was Celebrían - "
Faramir laughed.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing, it's just - queen of silver, queen of stars."
I inclined my head with a small smile, impressed. "She had married Elrond, but passed into the Valinor from an injury. I never knew her as a sister, only a friend - if that."
Faramir smiled humorlessly. "It is both wonderful and aggravating," he admitted.
"I should think so," I answered. "It is with anyone you love."
We stood in silence for a while, the early spring wind taking us both by pleasant surprise. I breathed in deeply as it blew by playfully, and I caught the smell of fresh bread and pipe smoke from the levels below. It was charming - very Minas Tirith. The restoration was going well; the new stones were just as white and strong as the old ones, but with new carvings depicting the Battle of the Pelennor Fields. Faramir seemed to see me looking at the carvings, and pointed over the way to a tall building on the level right below us. "There's one there of you," he said softly.
Surprised, I followed his arm towards the building, and, sure enough, there was one : it was me from the back, riding Guldurelon in the field, my sword held up high with the two beams of light emerging from the tips of the blades. Beyond, the Witch-King on his fell-beast, hovering in the air, and in the far back, the White City was visible. The carving was traditional and beautiful, depth and texture evident. Suddenly flustered and pleased, I turned back towards Faramir, unable to hide the soft smile from my face. "How did they know that's how it happened?" I asked.
"I don't believe you knew how much power your stars held, Elenathrian," Faramir laughed. "They lit up the horizon like nothing else. Almost everyone turned to watch." He paused, and then added more seriously, "It's how I awoke : a beautiful silver light stretched into my dreams until I opened my eyes and found that it was real. The stars had fallen, and you had captured them in the most magical way." I smiled, flushed, and looked back out at the stone.
"I am honored to be a part of the history of this city," I said finally.
Faramir smiled kindly. "I am lucky to have met you, Elenathrian," he said finally.
I laughed drily. "I suppose being trapped together because of injuries does have its benefits." Faramir laughed. I continued more seriously, "Besides, you wouldn't have met Eowyn if I hadn't gotten injured - which is beautiful in its own way, I suppose."
His smile softened at the mention of Eowyn, who didn't stir at all at the sound of her name. He glanced back towards her, a protective and passionate expression on his face, and I bit back a laugh. He looked caught in a daydream for a moment.
"Faramir," I said quietly.
He turned back to me, embarrassed, but I smiled reassuringly. "Try something," I suggested. "I don't think it would go badly."
His face lightened. "You think?"
I laughed then. "Go for it." I turned around to walk off, and when I reached the door, Faramir was facing the balcony once more, deep in thought.
-
Night began to fall while I walked around the city, watching the reconstruction and studying the engraved stones : there was one of Aragorn leading the army of the dead through the gates, one of Eowyn and Merry slaying the Witch-King, one of Legolas killing a Mumakil, one of Eomer with a spear, a very detailed one of the fight at the entrance to Mordor depicting individual soldiers, where I thought I recognized Mireclya and Gimli not far from Merry and Pippin, one of the Eagles arriving at the Black Gate, one of Gandalf flying towards Minas Tirith with Frodo and Sam - and many more.
I returned to the sixth floor reluctantly, as I wasn't allowed to be far from the House of Healing long after dark, but instead of going to my room, I went to the garden, where I found Legolas waiting for me. The sun had set, but it left red and orange on the horizon as the deep blue of the night began to creep in from high in the sky. The colors contrasted against his figure, making his silhouette glow strangely.
"Quel undome, Legolas," I said quietly once I was beside him at the railing, unsurprised to see him. (Good evening.)
"A formal greeting for such a conversation," he noted, and I couldn't help but laugh.
"Sorry, I had to say something," I said. "Against the sunset, you looked like a statue." He smiled down at me.
"You seemed to be expecting me?"
"This was the decision we made earlier," I said, unable to prevent the corners of my mouth from twitching into a smile.
His expression changed to a more serious one, and I looked away. "We came here to talk," he said quietly.
"For real, this time," I agreed, in the same quiet tone.
The conversation, however, stopped abruptly at that moment. We both stood there, willing time to freeze so we could just stand in the sunset forever, but we knew - as peace had passed into war, and the war was leaving scars for everyone - time had to pass.
"You are going to leave, soon," Legolas said, tense, his voice unquestioning and sad. I knew immediately he referred to my passing into the west, and not merely leaving the garden for the night.
"I must," I answered simply. I glanced up at him, and he turned his head towards me, his expression soft. I continued gently, "But this is not the end of all good things, Legolas. Though my time approaches to leave you and you must remain here, you must not dwell on our parting. You will be left with lifetimes of adventure that you shouldn't avoid because you are feeling alone." I grasped his wrist. "You will not be alone."
"Lady Galadriel - she spoke to me," he murmured after a pause. "'Legolas Greenleaf, long under tree, in joy thou hast lived. Beware of the Sea! If thou hearest the cry of the gull on the shore, thy heart shall then rest in the forest no more.'" His expression hardened, his face determined as he met my eyes. "I could choose to come with you, Elenathrian," he stated.
"You should not deprive yourself of the life you could have," I said, shaking my head. "I cannot ask you to come with me, Legolas."
"You do not have to, melenin."
I squeezed his wrist a little too hard, and quickly withdrew my hand when I realized. "Think about the big picture, Legolas. I will be gone, yes, but you have those who love you here still." I looked out over the city, picturing Legolas enjoying the rest of his lifetime through the years. I smiled. "You could visit the Hobbits in the Shire, stay with Aragorn and Mireclya in Gondor, visit Rohan, adventure with Gimli. You should not bind yourself to me because you love me differently than you love them." I looked back at him; his gaze was thoughtful and distant. "You should not forget about the friendships you have cherished."
"But you will not be there to do all those things with me."
"Legolas." I was beginning to grow frustrated, but did my best to hide it. "Please think."
He frowned. "I understand what you mean, Elenathrian, but it is different for me." I left a pause to allow him to gather his words, sensing that he wasn't finished. "I loved one other, only once." He smiled wryly. "It did not go well for me. She loved a dwarf that passed through my city as a prisoner, and later found him dead." His expression softened slightly when he looked back down at me. "I cannot let go of the one that did so easily."
"Just because I will not be present does not mean that we will forget."
"No, I suppose not," he sighed. "But it is not the same."
We both looked out at the horizon, both thinking of the future.
"Then that makes the reunion sweeter, does it not?" I said quietly.
Legolas put an arm around my waist and I leaned into his side. "This conversation gets harder each time," he said softly.
I couldn't help but smile. "I suppose it can wait a while. Appreciate what we have, at least until the coronation, right?"
"Na'han man hartha'im ten'an," he responded peacefully, tightening his comforting grasp around me. That's what I wanted to hear.
We stood in silence as the orange slowly fizzled to red on the horizon, and then as the deep blue of the night settled around the rising moon and the first stars came out. The temperature dropped steadily, but we remained outside, standing together in comfortable silence.
"Why are moments like these so much easier than those conversations?" I mumbled, half asleep.
"These moments are peaceful and enjoyable," Legolas said softly. "We dread that talk because how much it has to do with our namárië." He gently kissed the top of my head and slowly pulled his arm out from around me. "Go rest, Elenathrian."
I sighed, and stood up straight. "Good night, melethnin," I murmured as I walked off.
I could feel Legolas watching me, and I knew he had a small smile on his face that he always got when he was reassured.
I somehow found my way through the dark hallway to my room and slid into bed, unaware of whether Faramir and Eowyn were in or not, only wanting sleep.
-
The months that followed, Legolas and I avoided the conversation altogether, not wanting to even have to talk about goodbyes until they were necesary.
Blessed with immortality, the idea of a final goodbye both confused and scared us, and we skirted the topic carefully as time passed. We both knew we were avoiding it, but as we didn't speak about it at all, the pressure began to build as we slowly ran out of things to talk about; we knew the time was approaching to address what we would do after the coronation, when our time of peace would end and we'd be roped into wedding plans and then I'd have to start thinking about leaving Middle Earth for good
After I was released from the Houses of Healing, we still stayed up there a lot, as Frodo and Sam were still being kept even after they'd awoken, and the rest of our rooms were up there anyways. Inevitably, each week, we would always meet in their room and just talk.
Faramir and Eowyn had been released before me, but we still talked and usually went out for lunch together. I even grew closer with Eomer as he rode back and forth between Minas Tirith and Edoras every week or so.
The weather became more predictable as the smoke of Mount Doom cleared and Minas Tirith was revealed once again to natural climate. Late spring was in full bloom as May began, and coronation preparations had blocked off the entire seventh level around the citadel.
Legolas and I enjoyed our last few days of ignorance before the coronation in peace, however strained and tense the silences started becoming.