Jade and I don't speak much in the car. Both of us are looking at the new sales figures she received from her secretary when we landed. The numbers look promising and show a shift in the market. I look through a few more emails on my phone, not really paying much attention to where we're going. I shoot a quick text to Leigh-Anne, letting her know we've landed safely. About fifteen minutes later, we pull up to a large office building that's all windows.
I look over at the Thirlwall Security Forces sign and I'm suddenly confused. Clearly, this isn't the production facility. I glance at Jade. She's still engrossed in the figures, so she hasn't noticed we've stopped.
I clear my throat. "Jade, where are we?"
She looks at the building and back at me. "This is my other company. I run a security force that has contracts all over the world. I need to run in and show face for about ten minutes. Would you like to come in?" Her eyes shift back and forth and she sounds genuinely nervous.
Well there's a surprise. The woman owns a cosmetics company and a security company—talk about polar opposites. My eyes widen at her admission and then I recover, smiling softly. "If you'd like me to, sure."
We both exit the car and head over to the entrance. Jade places her hand on my shoulder as she opens the door. Just the small touch sends me into overdrive. I tilt my head and give her a small grin as I enter the office.
It's nothing like Raven Cosmetics. Where that office is almost feminine, this one is modern and masculine with clean lines and distinctive colors. The floors are gray concrete and the walls are cream and royal blue, which makes sense based on the décor from the plane. In the center of the room, there are two big cubicle sections that each seats five people. The left wall is taken up by four large offices with huge mahogany doors.
Jade clears her throat as we make our way into the space. Two guys and a woman stand and smile when they see her. A few other guys stick their hands up, acknowledging her presence, but continue to work.
"Hey, Muffin!" A tan, fit woman with long ginger hair styled back off her face says as she walks over, smiling. Her frame is bigger than Jade's and her arms are covered in tattoos, which might be intimidating if she wasn't so warm and friendly.
"Hey, Jesy." She looks happy to see her. The two women shake hands and clap each other on the shoulder. Jesy turns her attention to me with wide eyes and a large, appraising grin. Jade bristles. "Jesy, this is Perrie. She's the new publicist for the cosmetics company," she says stiffly.
I smile and extend my hand. "Hi, Jesy. Nice to meet you."
Jesy shakes my hand. "Perrie, it's a pleasure. Sorry you have to work with this freak all day." She elbows Jade in the stomach, still smiling at me.
I giggle and reply, "Interesting choice of words. Jade describes herself a little differently."
Jesy raises her eyebrows, looking intrigued by my statement. "Really? What did Muff describe herself as?"
"Muff?" I ask, completely lost.
She howls in laughter. "Yup. That's Jade! She was always a little soft in the middle,"—she leans in—"whereas the rest of us worked out to keep our amazing physiques." She stands back up, beaming. "So we told her she had a muffin top and that stuck as her call sign."
I giggle at the nickname and glance at Jade, who's shooting daggers at Jesy. Turning back to Jesy, I ask, "So what's your call sign?"
Jade places her hand on the small of my back. "Merida and I were both on the same team for four years."
"Merida? Oh, I gotta hear this!" I laugh. Now it's Jesy's turn to give Jade the evil eye.
Jade chuckles and pulls me against her side. "Just look at her hair?" She asks, jutting her chin out in her direction. I nod. These two are another versions of Leigh-Anne and me. It's comforting, considering the day I've had. "Well she looks like that princess in a Disney movie, the one with bow and arrows. One of the guys' wives had some kind of obsession with Disney. So Jesy here is the brave Merida."
Jesy scoffs and puffs her chest out. "I'm proud of my name. Besides, I could kick your ass any day, any time," she challenges, stepping closer to me as she smiles widely.
Jade raises her chin and addresses me. "She's an freak too but knows her shit, so she stays—for now." She smirks at Jesy. "And anyway, she knows who's in charge. Right, Jesy?" I'm sensing a cat-fight.
Jesy laughs and her eyes crinkle. "Keep thinking that, bitch. You need me too much." She puts her arm around my shoulders, taunting Jade.
"Right, remember who signs your paycheck." Jade raises a brow.
"Anyway, Perrie, this tramp gives you any problems, you call me and I'll kick her ass."
I instantly love this girl. She flashes me that ever-present smile one last time before heading back over to her desk. Jade grips my hip, grimacing and mumbling something under her breath.
Jade guides me over to an office and flips on the light before closing the door. It's large and airy. There are photos all over the wall and I walk over to get a closer look. There are a few of Jade, Jesy, and some other guys drinking and laughing. A few of her on a boat with some friends, looking carefree and happy. My stomach clenches at the next one. She's standing in camouflage with a huge gun slung across her body, a menacing look on her face. She looks scary yet unbelievably sexy.
"You know ..." I say, turning, and then I gasp as she startles me.
I was so lost in the photos I didn't even realize she was behind me. "What?" She smiles.
Once my heart settles and I can speak again, I remember what I was going to say. "You looked pretty nice in uniform."
"Nice?" she asks, arching a brow.
"Cute."
"Cute?" Apparently this is even worse than nice.
I look back at the photo, trying to figure out what she seems bothered over. "What? Is cute not a good word?"
I feel her move in behind me, and I struggle not to lean back into her.
"Cute is for babies and puppies. I can think of at least ten other words to better describe me," she says against my ear. A shiver races over my body and I have to consciously work to steady my breathing.
I close my eyes and smother the desire burning through me. "Really?" I ask breathily.
"Hot, sexy, fit, pretty, fucking amazing, God's idea of perfect ... I could go on, but any of those would be acceptable," she says, and I can hear the smile in her voice.
I turn to face her. We're so close physically, but in any other way we're miles apart. Still, I'm battling every cell in my body not to give in to her.
"Jade," I warn.
She takes a small step forward. "I know you're taken, but I can't stop thinking about you."
My brows furrow in confusion. "Taken?"
She looks down at my left hand and brings it up between us. "Aren't you engaged?" She looks from my eyes back down to my hand where my ring used to sit.
"Oh. Ummm, no. Not anymore. We're over and have been for a while." I don't know what to say. I can't tell her the guy was Zayn. I start to feel panic rising at how ridiculously screwed-up my life is and how all of this can come crumbling so easily.
"That certainly changes things." Her eyes blaze with unspoken promises.
"Changes things? No. It doesn't change the fact that you're my client." Or how I'm a mess over the constant screw-ups from the people in my life. And it definitely doesn't change how I know with every ounce of my being that Jade would ruin me if I let her in.
"Perrie, I can't stay away from you." Her voice penetrates through my thoughts, straight to my heart, and it takes me a second to find my resolve.
She cups my face in her hands, holding me, forcing me to look at her. "Jade, I'm not with anyone, but this isn't a good—"
Before I can finish my sentence her mouth is on mine. All at once, I'm surrounded by heat, strength, and power—all that is Jade. The sparks I felt previously are nothing compared to the inferno raging between us right now. I close my eyes and lose myself in the feel of her mouth on mine. My chest presses against her as she pushes me back against the wall and tilts my head to the side. Her tongue is against my lips, begging for entrance. I sigh, which is all the permission she needs. Our tongues swirl together as we kiss with fervor. Lifting my hands, I grip her hips and pull her closer. Wanting to touch her body, I trace my hands across the muscles of her back, over her arms, across the ridges of her abs. The way she feels against my lips, against my body, against my fingers ... it's incredible. I could kiss her forever—her mouth is heaven. Never have I been kissed like this. Jade shifts and lifts my head to gain better access, and I willingly give it to her. Pushing and pulling each other, trying to get closer and closer, I moan, causing Jade to break the kiss.
She rests her head against my forehead as we both struggle to catch our breath. I can feel the shift in her as she sighs loudly. "Fuck! I'm sorry." She shakes her head. "I shouldn't have kissed you." She leans back and looks over toward her desk.
I snap my head up, wounded and embarrassed by her sudden rejection. Her words, the regret in her voice, and her now distant behavior has me in knots. My stomach flops and I feel sick. She kissed me, and now she's acting like it was a mistake. I don't want to want her, but I do. As much as I want to fight what I feel for her, I'm not sure I'm strong enough. But maybe I don't need to be after all. Maybe my concern was all for nothing. Her aloof attitude stings, but I shove down my feelings. I can't let her know she's hurt me. I won't let another person destroy me.
I move over to the side of the room and take a deep breath. "Jade, it's fine. I should never have crossed that line." I don't know what line I actually crossed, but I'll take the blame. She's my client, and the last thing I need is for her to fire me. Besides, it will only be a matter of time before she sees the real me and decides she's better off. My mind is spinning as the pain of her rejection swells. My God, how many times will I do this to myself? You'd think by now I'd realize that every person in my life leaves. They take and take and then I'm left cleaning up the pieces, praying next time will be different.
She moves toward me and stops suddenly. She swallows hard and rubs her hand over her face. She looks sad and angry. "You did nothing wrong!" she snaps and I take a step back. She lifts her head to the ceiling and shakes her head. "You've had a lot of shit happen today. I didn't mean to ..." She takes a step forward with her hands by her side, clenched into tight fists. I'm not sure why she's so angry about it. I thought she enjoyed it, but I guess not.
I put my hands up to stop her—I don't want to hear it. "Please, just stop. Let's forget about it, okay? I'm a lot stronger than you think. I've dealt with a lifetime of this." I turn away and look out the window. I don't trust myself to say any more right now.
"Perrie, please ..." she pleads. I hear her step forward but she doesn't say anything else. It feels like five minutes have passed when I feel her hands on my shoulders. I shrug her off and turn to face her. The look in her eyes stops the hostility I was feeling. She looks devastated, torn. She swallows and her voice is soft, laced with pain. "I've wanted and yet not wanted to kiss you for the last two weeks. It isn't you, I promise. I don't want to take advantage of the grief you're feeling."
I don't know what to believe. "Okay, let's just call it what it was—a mistake. It won't happen again."
"I'm not sure about that—"
"I am. It won't happen aga—"
"It won't happen again on the day you lost a parent," she says with a small smile. "Don't misunderstand what I'm saying. I've been there. I know the pain you're feeling. Okay?" She takes a deep breath and looks at the wall of pictures, staring at one in particular. There are so many, I'm not sure which one she's looking at. However, she was a SEAL—maybe she's lost friends? My heart breaks for her at the thought, and I want to soothe her pain.
"I'm sorry you've lost someone."
"That's not for today. Let's get out of here." She smiles and walks over to her desk, grabbing some papers. I walk back over to the wall, looking at the photo of Jade—so strong and lethal.
A chill runs down my spine. Jade comes around to where I'm standing and looks at the photo. She's close enough that her arm and chest are touching my back, and I know she positioned herself there on purpose. Every time she touches me I lose the ability to think clearly. I step away from her, trying to keep some space between us.
"You done ogling my picture?" she asks.
My jaw drops at her sudden teasing. "I wasn't ogling. Maybe I was staring at Jesy's picture." I lift my eyebrows and challenge her.
"I'm sure she would love that." She smirks and turns to head out of the office.
Before we can leave, Jade's called over to handle an issue. I meet a few more people in the office as she's dealing with things. Once she finishes, we say our good-byes and Jade assures them that she'll be back in the office a few times this trip to work over some contracts. Jesy and a guy named Ski joke with her, telling her she can only come back if I come with her. She laughs and tells them she'll think about it. I'm captivated by the way she handles two companies—companies that are on such opposite spectrums. It's obvious the security company is her passion and evidently she's good at it, considering some of what I've heard here today.
Once we're back in the car, it appears all the joking and normalcy is gone. She seems distracted. I give her the quiet I assume she's seeking and try to focus on my own emotions. I press my hands to my lips. I swear I can still feel her. I can smell her cologne on my skin. The car is filled with tense energy. I want to say something but I can't. I know what her mouth tastes like, feels like. I'm fighting every part of my self-control to kiss her again. But her small rejection reminds me of the ability she has to hurt me. I don't know if I could handle that again. I promised myself I wouldn't go there until I was sure the person was worth it. And right now I'm not sure if Jade is.