(still in) Ricky’s P.O.V.
Have I ever told you how much I despised hospitals? Well, I do…more than anything.
But there I was; sitting awkwardly in the waiting room, my foot tapping on the linoleum floor and my hands gripping my phone with hesitation as I mulled over the idea of growing the balls to call Emma and tell her about her beloved best friend…and my ex-best friend.
I’d gotten really far. Really, I had! I’d been so strong as to look up her dusty contact in my address book and even click on her name. But my thumb still seemed to falter when it was hovering over the Call button.
I groaned out loud, shoving my head back against the wall. I closed my eyes and listened to the sounds of the hospital: the faint beeping of machines that were plugged up in the multiple rooms, the ringing of the phones, the soft voices of the nurses as they spoke to the other people that shuffled around the hospital, either biting their nails for the news or laughing as they found out that their worries were now meaningless.
Soaking in the sounds, a chill running up my spine, making my whole body shudder. It brought back memories of when I’d broken my arm in fourth grade and had been rushed to this very building, only to be in excruciating pain for the next 24 hours. I vowed never to let myself come back here.
But I was back.
“Mr. Stephens?” came a quiet voice.
I glanced up to find a doe-eyed nurse standing above me.
“Yes?”
“Mr. and Mrs. Cross would like you to join them in Nathan’s room. They’re ready to talk with you,” she gave me a small smile.
“Uh, what about my mom?”
We both looked over at Mom, who was passed out in a lounge chair a few feet away. Her pained expression had finally left her, leaving a tranquil mask across her face.
“Why don’t we let her sleep? She’s been here for hours now and must be exhausted,” the nurse said.
We both got up and she led me to the patient wing. We zigzagged through the halls until we came to his room. I peered inside and found Mr. and Mrs. Cross lingering over a bed. I braced myself for blood and guts, but found Nathan to be patched up and lying still in his bed.
“Ricky!” Nathan’s over-emotional mom squealed. “I’m so glad you came!”
I was then pulled into a vice-tight hug. When she let me go, I was wheezing.
“How’s he doing?” I asked when I regained my breath.
Her mouth dropped. Mr. Cross hunched over.
The nurse replied to my question. “I’m afraid that in Nathan’s conditions, it does not look good. There is a lot of internal bleeding and he’s punctured a lung. There are also some other issues that the doctors are unable to fix at the moment.”
I didn’t respond to her. I don’t think I could’ve even if I’d wanted to. He was dying. Both of his parents knew, the doctors knew, even I knew. We were all just too frightened to face the truth. Nathan’s death was inevitable.
“So there’s no chance?” I finally squeezed out, not turning to face the nurse. I just kept staring at sleeping Nathan.
“Don’t say that. Of course Nathan has a chance. There is just a lot going against him. But, he still has a chance.”
I walked to the bedside then, taking Mr. Cross’ place who’d gone to comfort his wife in the corner. I heard the door close and knew that the nurse had dismissed herself. A bit later, the parents left. Now it was just Nathan and I.
A strange feeling washed over me when I found myself staring down at my friend’s damaged body. He looked so peaceful, yet I knew a war was waging inside him. I couldn’t tell if he was winning or losing.
My hands clenched around the metal bars to his bed and my throat was beginning to close up. I was close to tears.
“Damn it,” I cursed. “Why wasn’t I there for you?”
A rustling came from him and he let out a soft grunt. It sounded like a “hey”.
“Are you awake?” I asked, ogling at him. “I thought you were dead for sure.”
His eyes fluttered open and he looked up at me. Nathan looked smaller and his skin was colorless.
“I’m not dead, you imbecile,” he whispered.
We both gave a hollow laugh.
“Surprised to see me?” I asked, a smile growing on my face.
“Actually, yes. You’re the last person I was expecting. Please, take a seat,” he gestured toward a nearby chair.
I scooted it over to his bed and took a seat.
“Alright, let’s start in the beginning. How the hell did you end up in his hospital bed?” I started.
He tittered a laugh. “Car crash.”
“I know, I know. But how did you get in the car crash?”
“Well, those two friends of Emma visited me and tried talking me in to getting Emma back from Florida. I turned them down, but realized my mistake. So, I decided to go after her myself and was about to drive down to Florida, but got hit by some idiot. I’m sure they’ve paid the insurance or whatever. But look where I am now. And it’s all for Emma,” he finished with a dark laugh.
I cringed.
“You’re not blaming this on Emma, are you?” I gulped.
“No, no! It’s my own damn fault.”
The room seemed to be rocking back and forth. I could feel my breakfast burrito rolling around in my stomach and knew that I couldn’t take much more of this. Somehow, I began tying Nathan’s predicament to myself. It was my fault he was here. It was my fault for making Emma leave.
“So, you want Emma back?” I asked, my voice growing a bit small.
“More than anything.”
“I…I can do that for you. If it’s the last-,” I stopped myself before getting ahead of myself.
Nathan gave me a look. I shrugged it off, taking out my phone.
“I’ll call her,” I murmured.
This was it. I had to do it. For Nathan. For Emma. For myself.
I tapped the number and before I knew it, it was ringing.
My heart was pounding. I was seconds away from hearing her again for the first time in years. She was in distance, finally. But what if she didn’t pick up? What if she saw the Caller ID and ignored it? Maybe she’d gotten fed up with my texts and decided to move on. I don’t think I could’ve left a voicemail.
Suddenly, the ringing stopped.
“Hullo?”
And there it was, echoing in my ear. Her voice, like jingle bells. The clarity of it wasn’t dimmed down by any bad reception, either.
We both were in silence. It was my turn to speak. But I couldn’t find my words. I found myself looking at Nathan, who lifted his eyebrows, urging me forward.
“Ricky?” Emma said my name into the phone.
“Emma,” I breathed.
I heard her inhale and I did, as well.
“Why are you calling?” she said after a long pause.
I was taken aback. No love confession? No cussing me out? No, “where have you been”? All I got was a stupid question.
“It’s Nathan…he’s been in a car wreck,” I said without emotion, still keeping eye contact with Nathan.
I heard a wrangled cry escape her mouth. The far-off sounds of a girl’s voice asking if Emma was okay reached my ears. So, she wasn’t alone. I probably should have asked if this was a good time to talk instead of dropping the bomb on her.
“What?” her voice grew desperate. I began pacing. “Is he alright? Where is he? Where are you? He’s not…”
She trailed off, unable to finish her question.
“No, he’s not,” I responded and she exhaled. “But he’s not doing well. I think you need to get here and see him.”
I knew she got my point. I knew she realized this might be the last time she’d be able to see him. I wondered if she was tearing up right now. I couldn’t hear her sniffling, but wondered if tears were running down her face.
“Okay,” Emma said. “I’m…I’m coming up.”
I was shocked. To hear those words seemed to lift this huge weight off my chest. Breathing became easier. My mind cleared.
“Really?”
“Yes. I guess I can take some time off of school. It’s for Nate. I don’t exactly have a way to…get back home.”
“Mom and Dad can buy you a ticket. We can have you on the next flight home,” I said, a little too eager.
Her musical giggle flickered through the phone. My stomach contracted.
“Alright. You can text me the flight details. I’ll start packing.”
I breathed a breath of relief. “Well, that was easy.”
“Ricky,” she pulled me back. “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. Don’t be thinking your mission to get me home has finally succeeded. I’m only visiting to see Nate. I’m not staying.”
And the weight came crashing back down.
“But, Emma-,”
“No buts,” she cut me off mid-sentence. “Send me the flight information. Goodbye, Ricky.”
The receiver clicked off. I hunched over in defeat.
“Emma being her usual stubborn self?” Nathan’s voice made me realize I was still in the hospital.
“Yeah,” I sighed, returning to my chair. “Chicks, huh?”
He laughed. I smiled.
“Ricky, I just wanted to let you know…” Nathan started but abruptly, his eyes began to water.
“What?” I asked, pulling closer. “What’s wrong?”
“You and I both know what’s going to happen. We both know my chances are slim to none,” Nathan whispered.
“No, no. Don’t say that,” I choked up.
“I know my own body. I can feel life leaving me.”
Nathan wasn’t the only one tearing up now. I grabbed for his hand and squeezed it in my own.
“Go after Emma,” Nathan looked me square in the eyes. “She was never meant for me. But just now, when you were talking to her on the phone…I now know you’re right for her. And if I don’t make it out of here, I want you to go after Emma. You’re the only one that can and it’s all I want.”
I broke down and just cried. So did Nathan. It was just us two, holding hands in a hospital room, bawling our eyes out. I didn’t mind. I think he was the only one I could do this in front of, other than Emma. I don’t think I would’ve cared if the nurse of Nathan’s parents walked in. I just needed a good, long cry.
“I’ll do it,” I said, wiping my eyes with my free hand. “I’ll do it for you, Nathan.”
He gave me a warm smile. “Good.”
As horrible as the moment was, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I released my grip on Nathan and took it out, reading the screen.
James had texted me. I swiped my phone to read it.
Heard about Nathan. Sorry. Anything new from E?
I began tapping away, and then hit Send.
Yeah. She’s flying in. And you’re going to pick her up.
Hey, guys. A bit of an emotional chapter. I started tearing up, me being the lame writer that I am. Just a heads up, my mom’s in town so I will not be online this whole weekend. So, enjoy the kaboodles-free weekend! <3