❝stars (pronounced stɑːz or stahrz), noun
fixed points of light in the night sky, burning balls of dust and ice that create an aesthetic, romantic atmosphere.❞
Friday night rolled around, and Phoenix was wearing his favourite red checked shirt, his leather jacket over the top, and black jeans. He kept trying to style his hair, eventually giving up and leaving it in its usual curly state. Ryan walked in and watched him staring at himself in his mirror, trying different ways of standing. "You okay there?"
"Yeah. Sorry."
"You seem a little nervous, bud," said Ryan, sitting on his bed. "What's the matter? I thought you said you were going out with a friend tonight?"
"Yeah. She-"
"Oh. It's a she, now?" asked Ryan, raising her eyebrows.
"Ma," he whined, and she laughed.
"Alright, I won't ask. But you seem a bit nervous. Do you want a cup of tea to ease your nerves?"
"No, that's okay," he said, looking back at the mirror. "Do you think I look okay?"
"You look very nice."
"Thanks." He looked in the mirror again, and sighed. "Do you think she likes me?"
"She asked you to tag along, right?"
"I guess." He sighed. "I really like her, Ma."
"Just see what happens tonight. No matter what, sweetheart, you've made a friend. That's enough, right?"
"I guess so. I dunno."
She kissed the top of his head. "Let me know when you're ready to leave. She said five?"
"Yeah. We're going to a movie, then we're grabbing dinner, and then to a museum, I think."
"Sounds good. No later than 9:30, okay?"
"Yep." He nervously adjusted his collar. "I think I'm ready."
"Let's go."
They left the house together. Phoenix was watching out the window, before turning to his mother. "Ma, I was following the case on the Internet. Did... did all that stuff really happen to Elle?"
"It did, yes."
"Is that why she wakes up screaming sometimes?"
Ryan nodded, then sighed. "Nick... this world is full of evil things. But you need to remember, there's beauty, too. The bad parts will always be there, but the good parts are, too. Just don't stop looking for the good."
He nodded.
A moment of silence passed between them, before he said, "Ma, Ebony has this really big scar on her face."
"A scar?"
"She hides it with her hair. She thinks it's ugly, and it kind of is, but she's pretty, so it doesn't matter. Should I bring it up?"
"Not unless she does," said Ryan. "She seems self-conscious about it, if she's hiding it with her hair."
"Okay," he said, nodding. "I don't know anything about her, Ma. Should I ask her?"
"That's what things like this are for," said Ryan, very conscious not to use the word 'date'. She didn't want to push the idea on him that this was a date. "You get to know the other person."
He was shaking slightly, and Ryan didn't draw attention to this fact. Instead, as they pulled up to the cinema, she said, "Don't worry, okay? You're friends. She obviously wants you to be there with her, and it'll be good for both of you."
He nodded. Then, he smiled slightly. "Thank you, Ma. I'm glad that I have you, even though I don't have Charlie and Martin."
Ryan's eyes filled with tears at this statement, though she hid this fact from him. "We're glad we have you, too. Have fun!"
He left the car, walking into the mall. The general air of gloom around him was beginning to fade, leaving a glow of excitement. He was starting to really feel the butterflies in his stomach, starting to really wonder if tonight would be the night that things might finally turn around for him. He turned a few corners, and saw Ebony, her hair still covering the side of her face, and an older girl, with another boy around her age. They were holding hands.
"Hi," said Phoenix, and Ebony smiled when she saw him. She looked so happy that he had to smile, too. It was rare for him, a real smile, and it felt different. It felt wonderful. She hugged him when he approached, and he could smell citrus in her hair.
The girl, Ebony's cousin, didn't look anything like her, but Phoenix nodded to them, holding out his hand. "My name's Phoenix."
"Pleasure! I'm Hida, and this is Josh."
Josh smiled as well, and Phoenix thought about how much like Drew he looked. They walked into the cinema, buying tickets and popcorn. Ebony stood aside with Phoenix, and she said, "I'm really glad you came."
"This is gonna be fun," he said, nodding. "We'll have a good time."
She looked down, biting her lip as she smiled, and Phoenix felt warm. Was this how it felt to have someone genuinely enjoy his company? Appreciate it, even? He knew his family loved him, but there was something different about Ebony.
"How's Nita?" she asked, her eyes curious.
"She's good. Getting on in years, but still playful," he said. "She's probably gonna be excited to see you again."
"You think she remembers me? No way. It's been ages."
"You'd be surprised, dogs are so much smarter than they let on."
"Oh, I know," she said. "Cats are the same. There's this stray cat that comes over all the time, and I feed him bits of chicken. He likes chicken the best. I've named him Poppet."
"Guys! Come on, we gotta get good seats."
"Coming," said Ebony, grabbing Phoenix's hand without warning and taking him over to the entrance. He couldn't believe it. Maybe Ryan was right after all.
The movie started quite quickly, and Phoenix wasn't really paying attention when he looked over and saw Ebony looking at him as well. She looked away again, both of them quietly awkward. They both heard a quiet noise and noticed Hida and Josh kissing quite passionately beside Ebony.
They looked at each other, dissolving into silent laughter, and Phoenix mustered the courage to put his arm around her shoulders.
Hey, if they were already flirting, why the hell not, right?
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They went to the museum after dinner, Phoenix's money beginning to run low, and Ebony took his hand again. "Come with me," she whispered, leading him away from Hida, who was examining some old scriptures under glass. They started running when they were out of sight, and Ebony ran up several stairways. "Are we allowed up here?" whispered Phoenix.
"Yeah, I'm sure we are," she said. "This is the astronomy area. There's a really pretty part of the museum I want you to see."
"Okay," he said. She looked around to see if anyone was around, then said, "In here," opening a door to... a room full of stars.
The Planetarium of the museum was huge, and the entire room was lit up beautifully like the countryside on a clear night. Phoenix could hear the soft pattering of rain against the building outside, and the entire room was totally empty, save for the two of them.
His heart started beating quite fast.
There was a circle in the centre of the room, and the roof was rotating slowly, and Ebony led them to the middle, the two of them lying down under the spinning stars. She took his hand again, and they stared up, both of them silent. Ebony's hair had fallen back, her scar open to the world. She had started getting more comfortable with it, with him, and she usually kept her hair back when he was around now.
He didn't initiate conversation, but she did. "You know, my face wasn't always like this."
"I know. I remember."
"I..."
"You don't have to tell me-"
"No, I want to." She sighed. "My dad was... he was a weird guy. He didn't take care of my mom much, and then one day, he... hurt her, really badly. She died. That was the day I saw you in the hospital, the second time?"
"Yeah." He squeezed her hand.
"I was... scared. Really scared. I thought nothing would get better ever again. And he was so angry because he didn't know what to do without her. He said he loved her. I think he was lying."
Phoenix rubbed his thumb across the back of her hand, and she squeezed appreciatively. "One day, he was really angry. He was angry because he blamed me. He said that Mom was sad after I was born, so it was my fault. He got out a knife and..." Her other hand reached up, brushing against her scar, and she sighed. "I went to the hospital. They did what they could, they gave me plastic surgery, but this was left behind. He lost custody of me, and I went into foster care. I've moved around a lot, but I came back here this year, because I have a new foster family. Hida's not really my cousin, she's my foster cousin. They don't want to adopt me because... they don't know if I'm problematic. There's not a real reason why my other foster families have pushed me away. Sometimes it's because the scar scares their kids. Other times, they just don't have time for me anymore. Kinda makes you wonder what family really means."
"You live with them now?"
"There's... there's every chance I might move again."
Phoenix's heart stopped.
"Not soon," she reassured him, noticing his sudden tension. "Maybe by the time I'm eighteen I can find my own place and stay there instead."
"Yeah," he said quietly.
"I'm sorry. You probably don't know much about that kind of thing. I'm sorry that-"
"No."
"What?"
"No, I..." He sighed. "My parents, my real parents, died when I was young. My aunt's husband was into some shady shit, and my parents died because of it. My aunt dropped me at Hunter's house, and they took me in, because Elle was maybe going to die."
"You were adopted?" she asked softly.
"Yeah." He turned to her. "I was. I know that it's... a weird feeling, to know that."
Ebony smiled, and her scar crinkled up the same way the corners of her eyes did. "I can't believe I've found someone who I can relate to so well."
"What would happen if they end up adopting you?"
"I end up being part of their family. I can call them Mom and Dad instead of by their first names. I wouldn't have to be scared about moving around again."
"We'll be eighteen in a few years, so that means even if you did move away, you could come back when we turn eighteen."
"What would I come back for?"
"Me, obviously."
She let out a loud laugh, her clear, happy voice echoing around the dome. "Oh, sure. Obviously."
They lay there in silence again, then Phoenix sat up. She did the same, and he moved closer to her, wrapping an arm around her waist. She leaned in, like this was a completely natural thing for them, resting her head on his shoulder, before looking up at the spinning sky. He did the same.
"You know," he said softly, "I wasn't sure if you really liked me at first. I thought you just felt bad for me."
"I still kinda feel like that sometimes," she said quietly. "I know you're not like that, but like... I'm so self-conscious about my scar, and I feel like it's all anyone ever sees."
"That's not true," he insisted, looking at her. "You're... you just..."
"Yeah?" she breathed. He could taste her breath on his lips. It was like blueberries and caramel.
He found himself speechless, looking at her eyes. He raised a shaky hand, bringing it to her face, and stroking her cheek softly, the way he had seen Hunter do with Ryan so many times. His fingers brushed against her scar, and she flinched slightly. He pulled his hand back again. "Did I hurt-"
"No, just... not used to it," she breathed. She reached up and moved his hand back to her face.
"I've never kissed anyone before," Phoenix whispered into the dark, the stars above illuminating both their faces so that they could just see each other. He hoped she couldn't see how red his face had probably gone.
"Me neither," she breathed, a small laugh bubbling from her lips. And God, her lips looked so soft and pink. "I've been waiting."
"For who?" he asked.
"Someone special, I guess," she said softly.
She was getting closer. Phoenix started noticing freckles on her skin, freckles that looked like the constellations swirling above them. It felt like his heart was racing erratically in his chest, and he moved his hand a little further back, this time feeling her hair. It was so soft. So dark and curly. It was the softest thing he'd ever felt in his life. This was the most incredible he'd ever felt in his life, too.
She looked up at the sky, rotating still, and said, "This is such a romantic setting."
He had a feeling that she was nervous about this too. He played along. "It's beautiful. But you're... you're more..." He couldn't bring himself to finish the cheesy sentence, and started laughing. Actual belly laughs, a laugh he hadn't laughed since... well, he couldn't even remember.
She started laughing, too. "You're too sweet," she said softly. "Thank you. Maybe we should stand."
"I think that'd be easier," he agreed, and they both stood in the centre of the room. The butterflies in his stomach weren't making things easy on him- no, he was shaking slightly.
"Are you nervous?" she asked him quietly.
"Is it obvious?" he asked, half joking, and she laughed softly.
"The thing is, Nick," she said quietly, "you're gonna have a hard time getting rid of me, now that I like you so damn much."
"Oh?"
She nodded, tiptoeing to reach his height, wrapping her arms around his neck and locking eyes with him. His hands moved to her waist, almost automatically. "You make me happy," she said.
"You do, too. Make me happy, I mean." He was stumbling over his words, speaking faster and faster by the minute. He could feel her heart racing, too. He'd never been so close to her, physically or emotionally. There was something pure and intimate about the moment they were sharing, and he was glad that it was just the two of them, alone. "May I... may I kiss you?"
Her eyes were sparkling as she nodded.
Slowly, carefully, and hesitantly, he leaned forward, closing his eyes and pressing his lips against hers.
And they kissed under the starry night sky.
*a/n: sometimes I wonder if I'll ever have anything happy to say here
nethii <3*