My lungs burned and a sharp pain rushed its way through my chest. My insides were on fire and my heart beat twice as fast. The hyperventilated pulsate of my chest was ominous and dark spots danced through my vision.
When in the face of danger, you had three options: to freeze, to run or to fight.
My mind froze but my legs untangled themselves and pushed me out of the kart, crossing the track in seconds before moving away, out of sight. I could hear Phoebe and Lisa calling my name but I kept on running, not able to stop my feet from moving.
Once I ducked behind a big grey wall that had cracks on the surface, I stopped and caught my breath. The aggravating smell benumbed my nose. I felt like I have just run a marathon, my throat was in a desperate need for water. I could feel my heart pulse in a quicker pace than usual and I yearned for it to calm down.
Heavy footsteps sounded from afar, stepping closer, moving in my direction.
My eyes scanned my surroundings and I longed for my bed where I knew I'd be safe.
The footsteps were only a shot away and my wheezing was in danger of giving me away.
I closed my eyes, afraid of what I would see. However, my brain didn't work like a kid's one. I knew it wasn't as easy as "I can't see anyone so no one can see me." I was exposed and I haven't felt this way for barely two years now. The short encounter in the supermarket felt like ages ago and I preferred to believe that my mind had played a trick on me then. But not this time.
A strong hand tugged at my shoulder, making me yelp out in shock.
He found me.
"Zoey?" The deep husky voice addressing me wasn't his voice.
Frost blindsided me, replacing the burning feeling.
"Are you okay?" The voice was hesitant, not sure how to react to my breakdown.
I didn't dare to move, afraid of the tears and thoughts that could escape. My strong and confident appearance had faltered but I had the urge to-
My train of thoughts came to an abrupt stop when strong arms pulled me into a warm embrace. I pushed my face into Harry's chest and only realized I was crying when my hot tears wetted his shirt. I wrapped my arms around his lean torso, pulling him as close as physically possible.
Harry's arms hung around my shoulders and one of his large hand stroked my hair, calming me. He whispered soothing words in my ear, not really knowing what to say.
I didn't know for how long we stood like this, our worlds not spinning.
Before long, my breath returned to normal and the tears stopped but never once did Harry's hold on me loosen.
Fatigue overwhelmed me. I didn't trust my voice yet so I just tugged at Harry's shirt, motioning for him to sit down with me. He understood what I required and sat down, his back to the dirty wall but he didn't even flinch. He took my, in comparison small, hand in his and gently pulled me down, making me sit between his legs. My back was pressed into his chest and his legs imprisoned me. His arms wrapped around me once more, this time around my waist. His arms hung in front of my tummy and I placed my arms over his, relaxing slightly.
A wave of security overran me. Harry kept quiet, either not knowing what to do or waiting for me to be ready to talk. I wasn't sure which one it was but for now I enjoyed the silence.
No one came after us, we were left in utter silence.
After a few minutes, I cleared my throat in an attempt to test my voice. The confirming noise rang out but I couldn't find the words to say.
Harry noticed my struggle and took matters in his own hands. "Do you want to talk about it?" His voice was quiet and he spoke slowly, stressing the words slightly to turn attention to the topic on hand.
I nodded slightly but didn't talk.
And again, Harry was the one who asked. "Who was this boy?"
"It-it was him," I croaked.
"What's his name?"
"Zayn." And with that name, a thousand memories flashed through my mind in the blink of an eye.
"Close your eyes," his soft voice filled my ear.
I did as I've been told, my trust in him higher than the Empire State Building. He took my hand and tugged lightly. "Follow me but keep your eyes closed."
A smile played on my lips and the excitement was thick in his voice.
I trotted behind him, my bare feet touching grass. He was careful to lead me over clear parts, avoiding sticks and stones. After quite some steps, the ground changed and I stepped onto warm sand.
"We're nearly there," he informed me. It was true, only a few steps later he told me to open my eyes.
I gasped in amazement, the scene in front of me too beautiful to be touched, in case it could be ruined. It was like one of those painting on the wall in a waiting room. The waterfall splashed all around, making the most beautiful sound nature has to offer. The beach was small but the privacy of it made it even better. This little secret place was surrounded by a field of flowers and trees. The sun seemed to shine extra warm in this cave.
Zayn guided me to a picnic blanket and made me sit down, smiling widely at my admiration.
This memory stood out. I had flashbacks every now and then, most of them of good times. We had many beautiful memories, too many even.
"He was my everything," I whispered, not wanting to disturb this silence with my high-pitched voice. "But what he-he did was horr-" I caught myself, not craving to relive my worst nightmare again. "Unforgiveable."
"What did he do?" Harry asked, concern clear in his voice.
I just shook my head, the tears threatening to spill over again. I could only tell him so much right now before I would break down for a second time tonight.
Harry didn't urge me to tell him anymore and I was grateful for his sympathy.
"Let's go somewhere else, get your mind off ... him," Harry suggested.
I didn't need to be told twice. I wiped my eyes while Harry guided me back to our things. I noticed the others' stares but I kept my eyes on the ground. We quickly grabbed whatever we had left before and made our way away from the go-kart track.
We reached the parking lot but instead of steering towards his car, Harry led me away from it and towards the sidewalk of the street that ran parallel to the go-kart track. I shot him a confused look.
"My car's at Niall's but it's not far." After a quick glance my way, he added, "A short walk might do you a wonder."
I shrugged my shoulders, not really caring.
A little breeze blew a strand of hair in my face and I reached forwards to tug it behind my hair but my right hand didn't budge. Harry felt me tugging at our intertwined fingers but I hadn't noticed he was still holding my hand after guiding me away.
I foresaw him loosening the grip but I held on tighter, not wanting to let his warm hand go. There was a small smile on his lips and he reached over to tug the strand of hair behind my hair. I looked up at him through my eyelashes, smiling my thanks at him.
The sun was setting down, I hadn't realized it was already that late. We spent more time at that track than I had imagined.
On our way to Niall's apartment, we passed a Chinese takeout and decided to order a box of noodles. We ate them on our way, relishing the taste of chicken and in fat bathed noodles.
"Where are we going?" I asked after we threw the empty boxes away.
"To Niall's flat," Harry answered with a grin.
"I mean after that." I managed to not roll my eyes. That feeling was displeasing anyway.
"You'll see." The small smile never leaved Harry's pink lips.
"Tell me something about you," I encouraged Harry. I still didn't know him enough but I knew for a fact that I couldn't stay away from him. Something always drew me back.
"When I was little, I didn't go out on the football field like other boys did. I would stay at home and annoy my sister." I could tell this story would be going somewhere funny according to the smile on Harry's lips but his eyes held a slice of sadness. "She is around three years older than me and she definitely didn't want to play with her little brother. Her friends used to come over. You should have seen them. They were barely able to reach the shelves in our kitchen but yet they dressed up like princesses, believing they owned the world. I wanted to be part of their little group but my sister firmly told me no. It wasn't until Annie, one of her friends, told her to give it a try. My sister's friends loved me but there was one condition: I had to dress up as well. So I ran around in a pink dress with white roses sewed to the seam and mascara all around my eyes. My parents genuinely thought they had two daughters."
That was enough to throw me into a laughing fit. "Is it bad that I can actually imagine that? A cute little boy running around with his brown messy curls tied back in pigtails and his beaming green eyes looking all dark." I burst out laughing again.
Harry raised his eyebrows when I said 'cute' but didn't comment on that part. "Actually, my hair was straight and blond."
"So you're wearing a wig now?" I attempted to joke.
Harry let out a noise between a laugh and a cough which only made me smile wider.
"Nope but I've thought about getting a Mohawk next week," he said, his face all serious.
I stopped dead in my tracks. "W-what?"
Harry looked me in the eyes, not saying anything for a few moments before a smile played along his lips. "I was only kidding. You should have seen your face!" With that, he was the one who started laughing out loud.
I tried to look pissed off but his good mood was kind of contagious.
"I think I have to meet your sister one day. I need her to show me some baby pictures of you!" I yelled, clapping my hands in excitement.
Instead of a sassy remark or a laugh, I was greeted with silence. When I looked over to Harry, his eyes held the sadness once more. He sensed my stare and turned around, a smile on his lips. It was fake but I guessed he had a good reason for it so I didn't talk about it anymore.
What was it about his sister that made the life in his green eyes disappear?
"We're there," Harry stated, heading for his black car. I followed him and smiled when he opened the passenger door for me. That boy sure made me smile a lot.
His car was warm and I sank into the seat, fastening the seat belt. My thoughts shifted back to the group we had left behind. Hopefully we didn't ruin their good time. Lisa probably assumed I was in good hands even though she wasn't too fond of Harry. I knew for a fact, that Phoebe and Adrian would think I had a good time now.
Harry turned on the radio and we sat in silence, listening to the beat of some new pop song that played throughout the car.
After about 15 minutes, we stopped in front of a well-lit gate. It was open widely, welcoming everyone. I saw a few parents walk in with their kids before my eyes fell on the big sign reading "zoo".
I had quite a big heart for some animals but the zoo presumably had to close soon, so we wouldn't have enough time to walk around.
As if he could read my thoughts, Harry explained that there would be a show.
We followed the families and entered a little amphitheater. We took a seat at the very top of it, having the perfect overview. All around us were kids with their parents, excitement written all over their tiny faces.
There was a huge red curtain that covered the target of attention tonight.
"When does it start?" I asked Harry but the man in front of us answered my question. "At 7." I thanked him and caught a glimpse of Harry's watch. We had 20 minutes left.
Harry was a great company and he filled our waiting time with cheesy jokes. They were bad, really bad. Actually, they were so bad that they were good again, making me smile at their stupidity. I told him he had no future as a comedian but he swore people would love his jokes.
The light flickered twice, indicating that the show was about to start at any moment.
Indeed, the curtains pulled away two minutes later, revealing a huge water tank. I gasped when I saw what was inside.
Dolphins.
"I love dolphins!" I screamed. Normally, I would be embarrassed for my outburst but all the kids around me were screaming as well so no one besides Harry had heard me.
He smiled at me and our eyes interlocked. The light behind me reflected in his eyes and I could see his iris and the beautiful green color his eyes held. There was a thin black line around it, isolating it from the white of his eyes.
I studied his eyes and tried to remember if I had ever seen green eyes in my life. Probably, they were rare but not unhuman.
The analysis of his eyes clouded my judgment and I didn't react when Harry leaned closer, our faces only inches apart.
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