This is good...
I take a sip of my drink while I sit in the cafeteria, eating my lunch.
Things don't feel quite so horrible anymore. For so long, I've hated this place. I might get good grades and do my homework and all that, but I've always hated the fact that I had to come to this place to get all those good grades. I hated this place and the people in it. Mostly just the people in it. They're all so mean and stuck up. Or most of them anyway. There are a couple people here who aren't so bad. People like Tess.
I'm so glad that she was so cool about me and Faith. I don't know what I would've done if she hadn't been. She could've gone and told everyone. That would've been a total disaster. Buffy would've found out and that would've opened up a whole new set of problems. There could've been a fight. Faith and my sister have never been the best of friends. They've never gotten along perfectly. If my sister found out that Faith and I are dating, she'd probably go nuts and start throwing fists.
But Tess was cool. She didn't say anything. No one batted an eye when we came back together. Willow told my sister that we went to fix our make up and everything was fine. We just went on with our night and had a whole bunch of fun. The girls were really cool. We talked about all the crappy teachers at school, and about a couple of the cute guys we see all the time. It was a little weird, talking about guys in front of Faith like that. She seemed to take it pretty well though, even joining in from time to time when we started talking about Brad Pitt.
It was a fun night. Especially when Faith and I snuck away again for a little grope session in a dark corner of the club. This whole making out thing is so much more fun then I thought it was. She makes it feel great. The way she touches me. The way she kisses me. The way my core aches for more when we stop. It's such an incredible feeling. I only wish we could've been alone so we could do a little more than just kiss and touch.
Every time we touch and kiss each other, I can't help wanting more. The more I touch her, the more I find my hands wandering to places where I can feel her skin on mine. A lot of the time, I'll slide my hand up under her shirt, just to feel her soft and smooth skin. We never go too far though, mostly because every time we do make out, it's usually in a place where we could get caught at any moment. Not sure why it keeps happening that way, it just always seems to be that way.
Tess is the only one who's actually ever caught us in the act though, so I guess it's a good thing she didn't freak out. She's one of the good people. The few people who actually used to make coming here even halfway bearable. It's not so horrible anymore though. After helping Faith and my sister with their training session and hanging out with the other slayers afterwards, I feel a lot better about being here.
It's not as horrible as it was before. The people here don't seem quite as self-centered and mean as they did before. Probably because it feels like I have actual friends now. I didn't before. Most of the students and teachers thought I was weird. Even the slayers seemed to stay away from me unless there was some sort of emergency, I'm not sure why. It doesn't feel that way anymore. It feels... normal. I feel normal. And I'm sure having a super hot girlfriend who wants me real badly doesn't hurt.
Suddenly, I see something freaky that I've never seen before. Candy is making her way over here with her lunch tray, and for the first time since I came to this school, half a year or so, she doesn't have Carmen and Tess with her.
What the heck happened to her? Did she get some sort of terrible contagious disease that made her friends shun her and now she's hoping to give to me?
She makes it to the table and smiles at me.
This is completely freaky. It doesn't look like that big huge fake smile she usually sends my way. It's almost like she's actually happy to see me or something.
"Hey Dawn, do you mind if I sit down?"
All right, this has moved passed freaky and is bordering on just plain creepy. She actually sounds like she wants to sit down and have a conversation with me. That like, never happens.
"Why?"
The girl who's made it her job to be my mortal enemy since I came here takes a deep breath and the smile has turned into a serious and slightly shameful look.
"I'd like to talk to you about something."
Candy was very quiet after I beat her in the sparring match we had. She came to the party at Slash and pretty much spent the whole time sulking and being quiet. Any time anyone asked her what was wrong she'd say she was fine, even though it never looked like everything was. So why does she suddenly want to talk, least of all to me? Well, I guess I could tell her to sit down and find out.
"Okay..."
She smiles when I say it's okay and sits down across the table from me. This is followed by complete silence from both of us. I start picking at my lunch and she just kinda avoids eye contact with me for a while.
I might as well start with the obvious and try to have a conversation with her.
"So where are Carmen and Tess?"
Candy looks down at her lunch shamefully before answering.
"I... I decided I didn't really feel like hanging out with them today."
That statement has me even more curious about what she's doing here.
"But, how are you going to annoy me without Carmen's help?"
Candy doesn't respond with her usual back talk and insults. In fact, for the first time since we've known each other, she's actually silent for a while.
"Yeah, about that... I'm sorry."
She's what?
"What's that?"
"I'm sorry..."
All right, I wasn't sure I heard that right the first time.
"For what?"
"For... all the times I've been mean to you and stuff."
This is completely unbelievable. What kind of game is she playing?
"Since when?"
She shifts uncomfortably in her seat.
"Since, you know, Saturday mostly."
Oh...
"Ever since I got these powers and found out I was a slayer, I've been kind've a bitch to everyone. I guess I got it into my head that being a slayer made me somehow better than other people and I used that as an excuse to be really mean to people for no reason. Especially to you, I'm not sure why exactly. But after Saturday when you kicked my ass the way you did, I'm starting to realize that I wasn't really fair to you as a person. I was a royal bitch and I feel bad. So I'm sorry."
Now that's something I never thought I'd hear from her. I just assumed that she'd be a huge bitch until college and then find other, slightly smarter people to terrorize. It never occurred to me that she might actually feel badly about it. But I guess that was kinda the point that my sister and Faith were trying to make to all the slayers by getting me involved. It must have worked.
"It's okay."
Candy takes another deep breath while fidgeting with her lunch.
"No, it's not. But I'd like to try and start to make up for it by... being your friend."
She wants to be my friend?
"Really?"
She nods slowly.
"Yeah..."
"No, seriously... really?"
"Yes, really. And I was talking with Carmen about it and she pretty much feels the same way after the beating you gave her."
Hmm, do I really want to be friends with someone who has tried to make my life miserable since the moment I got here? I suppose it wouldn't be terrible if she's really serious about making up for being so mean to me. Who knows? She might actually be a decent person under all that bitchy-ness.
"Well, I guess we could try it for a while."
A real smile comes over Candy's face when I say that.
"Yeah?"
"Sure why not."
"That's cool, I'd like that."
"Okay then..."
I hold out my hand across the table.
"Friends?"
She takes my hand firmly and shakes it gently.
"Friends..."
After shaking hands, we both sit together in uncomfortable silence. We pick at our lunches for a while before I actually start eating it.
So now what do we talk about?
* * *
I push her against the back of the elevator as the doors close behind us. I get in her personal space the second she hits the wall, pushing every inch of my body I can up against hers. Within seconds, our lips meet and I kiss her hard and fast. Her hands wrap themselves around my back, pressing our bodies together even more.
God she's so sexy. I can't keep my hands off her.
Speaking of my hands, I use my right one to grope her tit, kneading and massaging it happily. She moans into my mouth and that just makes me kiss her harder. One of her hands moves down my back to where she grabs my ass. That makes me push myself harder towards the wall and into her. When air becomes a problem, I pull back. We smile at each other as she runs both of her hands over my ass and I continue to massage one of her tits.
"You're so hot, Faith."
She grips my ass a little harder. It makes me gasp and close my eyes as I turn my head up at the feeling. That gives her the opening to start kissing my neck. My hands leave her back and her breast to wrap them around her neck, to keep her kissing my neck. Faith's hand slides from my ass to my thigh, pulling it up and I wrap it around her as much as I can. She pushes herself off the wall and shoves me against the wall just to our left.
"You're pretty damn hot yourself Dawn."
Her thigh rubs up against my core while kissing her way up my neck, looking in my eyes before crushing her lips against mine in a searing kiss. Our kiss continues as the bell rings on the elevator and the doors open.
"Oh my god!"
Faith and I stop kissing to see Buffy standing just outside the elevator.
"What the hell are you doing to my sister?"
Doing to me?
"She's... she's not doing any, thing to me."
The look of shock on Buffy's face changes to one of anger. She rushes right up to Faith and grabs her by the shoulder, throwing her off me and into the opposite wall. While Faith gets over the shock of being thrown across an elevator, Buffy charges her and pins her against the wall with her forearm. I'm still leaning against the wall, a little shock going through me at the thought that my sister just caught me making out. My sister yells at Faith.
"You're KISSING my SISTER?"
I've got to do something. Buffy will kill her.
I pull myself off the wall and get beside my sister.
"Buffy... Buffy stop. It's okay. I wanted her to. She wasn't forcing me into anything I didn't want to be doing."
Buffy ignores me, her angry eyes focused squarely on Faith.
"This wasn't part of our deal."
Deal? There's a deal?
"What are you talking about? What deal?"
That makes her look at me for a second but only long enough to answer.
"Dawn, I will handle this."
Handle this? Handle what?
"You were supposed to protect her and make sure she didn't drink herself into a coma, not rip her clothes off and fondle her."
"B, come on, just calm down and let me explain."
What the heck is going on?
"Not a chance F, not when you're taking advantage of my sister like that."
Taking advantage? She wasn't...
"She wasn't taking advantage of me Buffy. I was the one that kissed her."
"Yeah but she probably talked you into it. What are you trying to do Faith? Get another piece of the Summers pie? You had me, now you're after my sister?"
What?
I look to Faith.
"What is she talking about Faith?"
Faith pushes my sister off her and stands up.
"That was your idea B, you kissed me."
Faith kissed my sister?
"Just like I kissed you?"
The woman I was kissing only a second ago looks at me.
"No, Dawn... that was different. What we have is so much more."
"So much more than what? You and my sister? How long have you been two timing me with my sister?"
How could she do this to me?
"I'm not two timing you Dawn. Buffy and I had one night, five years ago. It hasn't happened since and I would never want it to, not with what we have."
Faith turns to my sister.
"Tell her..."
It takes Buffy a second to answer as she stares at Faith with hate in her eyes.
I don't know how Buffy can be angry. All I feel like doing is bawling my eyes out.
"She's telling the truth. It was only one night. But that doesn't mean I'm not right. For all we know you could be going after my sister just to see how good she is compared to me."
Oh god... what if Buffy's right? What if that's all she's after?
"It's not."
"Yeah right."
"It isn't... why would I do that? I've changed. You both know that."
Tears sting my eyes and things start to get a little blurry.
"So you stopped killing people. That doesn't mean your other habits have changed."
She's just using me. She's using me for sex and then she'll just dump me.
"God... B, when are you going to wake up and stop assuming the worst about me? I'm not using anyone, least of all your sister. So would you just shut up and let me talk to her?"
All she wants is to get in my pants and then she'll hurt me.
I wrap my arms around my stomach as I start to feel sick.
"And by the way, our deal didn't have anything to do with how I feel about Dawn."
They made a deal.
"What deal?"
My blurry eyes look at my sister. Silence comes from my sister instead of my answer.
"Yeah B, why don't you tell Dawn?"
She's not allowed to be mad.
"YOU shut up. I'm not talking to you."
"What kind of deal did you make about me Buffy?"
Again Buffy doesn't say anything.
Why won't she answer me?
"WHAT DEAL DID YOU MAKE?"
Buffy doesn't answer my right away.
"I... I had to make sure you were all right Dawnie."
Oh god...
"I... you were drinking and partying all night and doing all kinds of things that could get you in the hospital or worse, I had to make sure you weren't going to hurt yourself."
I think she looks at Faith but I can't tell because I'm crying and my stomach ache is starting to make me feel like throwing up.
"So I asked Faith to have fun with you and make sure you were all right."
Oh god... how could she do that to me?
"You sent someone to spy on me? How could you do that to me? I asked you to leave me alone and instead you have someone watching my every move? How could you?"
"I needed to know that you weren't going to get hurt or anything."
"Well congratulations B, looks like that worked out well for you."
"Shut up Faith."
"Shut up yourself B."
They charge each other, fists raised.
No, I'm not going to let them fight like this.
Wiping the tears out of my eyes, I get between them before they hurt each other.
"Stop! Just stop it."
Buffy lowers her fist and backs off.
"You're right... fighting isn't going to solve anything. Faith, you should go home. Dawn, we can talk about this later."
"Don't give me orders B. I'm not going anywhere until I know Dawn's all right."
Turning to Faith, I look her right in the eye with every drop of anger I can muster behind my tears.
"I don't ever want to see you again. How could you use me like this? You spied on me and told my sister everything you saw. You never wanted to spend a single second with me. You only came near me because Buffy told you to. Then you kissed me and said everything I wanted to hear just to get in my pants. How could you?"
"Dawn, that's not true. I meant everything I said."
Faith tries to reach out to me but I step back, inadvertently towards Buffy.
"Don't touch me."
I hear Buffy from behind me.
"It's all right Dawnie."
She puts her hand on my shoulder but I shrug it off and step away from both of them, wrapping my arms around my stomach when the sick feeling gets worse.
"Don't either of you touch me."
I move towards the doors.
"Both of you betrayed me."
I walk into the closed doors of the elevator.
I can't even look at either of them.
Pressing the 'Open Doors' button over and over again, I wait for the doors to open.
"You betrayed me."
The doors finally open and I leave the elevator, watching them both to make sure they don't follow me.
"I wish you were both dead."
Then I turn and run down the hall to my apartment.
"Dawnie, wait..."
I keep running and pull out my keys as I get to the door. My fingers feel like jelly as I try and fumble for the right key to open the door. That horrible sick feeling in my stomach gets worse as I can't find it.
"Leave her alone B."
"You should take your own advice Faith, haven't you done enough?"
They keep fighting while I find the right key and barely get it in the lock, opening the door. I slam the door behind me as I run for the bathroom when I start to feel the bile in my throat.
I think I'm going to be sick.
Looking right at the toilet, I slam the bathroom door behind me and fall to my knees. I cover my mouth just long enough to open the lid of the toilet seat before everything in my stomach comes right back up.
How could they do this to me?