****
Review:
“Carter, something’s wrong” Lucky said as the group dispersed and they sat on a rock. He shook his head.
“Nothing’s wrong” he said, getting irritated now. Not with Lucky but with himself.
“But-” she started but he cut her off.
“Nothing’s wrong Sarah” he said before he could stop himself. He heard a gasp and turned to Lucky and noticed tears filling her eyes.
“Did you just call me Sarah?” she asked, the tears began to fall, Carter reached for her to wipe them away but she slapped his arm away. He realized he had made a mistake. A huge mistake.
“We probably shouldn’t be together” she said, breaking his heart. They had only just gotten together.
“Why?” he asked, gritting his teeth to keep from shouting at her. He already knew Nick, who was nearby would have been listening but the rest of the class were either swimming or close to the shore.
“Because it doesn’t make sense” Lucky said, wiping away her tears angrily.
“What do you mean? I want to be with you. I’ve wanted to be with you for months now, Lucky” he explained, trying to reason with her.
“You called me Sarah. Do you want to be with me or with Sarah?” Lucky asked before she stood up and walked away. Carter stared after her retreating figure in shock. He felt a strange sense of déjà vu sitting on that rock, considering this was where he came after Sarah died whenever he was depressed, which was all the time. He chuckled dryly and slouched back, staring at the ocean.
“What was that about?” he heard Nick asked, he looked up and saw Nick giving him a pitiful look.
“I’m sure you heard it” Carter said, as Nick took a seat next to him.
“I did. You know you’re my best friend right?” Nick asked suddenly, Carter nodded and he continued. “Yet I don’t know everything I should know about you, when it comes to your relationship with Sarah, I mean.”
“She was my best friend and girlfriend. I loved her. This was where we had our last date, that was the day she died because I lost control of the car because we were arguing. I never went to her funeral. I just- I couldn’t so I came here instead because I didn’t know where else to go” Carter said, avoiding his best friend’s gaze.
“So do you see Sarah in Lucky?” Nick asked, it seemed he had given that question some thought.
“Not at all. They’re opposites. Lucky is insane, bold, she does whatever she wants and says whatever she wants whenever she feels like it but she has a heart of gold. Sarah was quiet and shy but she was loud when she felt it was necessary and she was kind of stuck up” Carter said, smiling as he thought of Lucky. “And Sarah would have never dyed her hair blue” he joked. Nick chuckled and shoved Carter’s shoulder lightly.
“Well, then it’s obvious you love Lucky” Carter’s head popped up when Nick said ‘love’ so casually. “So make it obvious and show her.”
Carter was just about to agree when his phone vibrated in his pocket. He took it quickly, hoping it was Lucky but groaned when he saw it was his mother.
“Carter” his mother said, sounding relieved. He resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
“Yes, mom” he said, in the most polite tone he could conjure up.
“Your father and I are coming to visit you in New York” she said, making him almost drop his phone. Nick gave him a questioning look and he mouthed ‘later’.
“Why?” he asked, trying to keep up the polite tone.
“To take you back to Washington” she said. His eyes widened and he thought about how when he left he didn’t even want to come but now he never wants to leave. He shook his head several times but she kept talking. “I called Uncle Sid and he said you’re doing much better now so I guess you’re ready.”
He had neglected to tell his parents that he was on a class trip to Washington.
“Mom, I want to stay” he said but he knew it wouldn’t be so easy.
“It wasn’t a request Carter” she said coldly before the line went dead.
~~~~
“What do you mean you’re leaving” Nick asked, grabbing Carter’s hand as he threw another shirt into his suitcase. It had been three weeks since they had returned from their class trip to Washington and three weeks since he had snapped at Lucky and accidentally called her Sarah in the process. None of that was supposed to happen. Lucky had told him once that she loved going to Washington because it felt like her ‘good luck’ state. Her parents had fallen in love there and her parents’ story was unlike any other.
“My mom called the same day Lucky broke up with me and said that since I’m ready, they’re taking me back to Washington to live” Carter said, breaking free from Nick’s grip and throwing the shirt into his suitcase.
“Ready for what?” Nick asked, cocking one eyebrow. His eyes were full of hurt and Carter was sure he looked the same way. In the nine months he had been in New York, Nick had become his best friend, along with Daniel, Maria and Lucky but Nick was almost like a brother to him.
“They sent me here to get over Sarah because I was moping around too much. They figured being out of the State where she’s buried, where we met and where her family lived and where she died would get me better. They were right, I moved on but I don’t want to leave” he answered Nick with a sigh before shoving his football uniform into a duffel bag. He was about to throw his football into the bag as well before Nick stopped him, a fierce determination in his eyes.
“You’re not leaving Carter” he said, grabbing the ball and tucking it safely under his arm. “You’re my co-captain and my best friend and therefore you can’t leave.”
“I appreciate that but what am I supposed to do when my parents show up in three days?” he asked, slightly amused at his friend’s speech.
“What does Coach always tell us when we lose a match?” Nick asked. Carter slumped down onto his bed, next to Nick, not knowing where this was going. He shrugged, indicating for Nick to continue. “Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to things the change I can and wisdom to know the difference.”
Carter thought over Nick’s words. Coach always recited the Serenity Prayer for them but in this case what was the thing that could not change? Sarah’s death? He already accepted her death so that’s one part down. But did he have the courage to stand up to his parents and stay in New York? Did he have the courage to get back together with Lucky?
“You’re right” Carter murmured. “The only question is, who am I ready to deal with first?”
'~'~'~'~'~'~'~'~'
“What do you want, Nichols?” Mikael, Lucky’s older brother, asked. Carter had decided to go to Lucky’s house to apologize and try to work things out with her but he began to regret his decision as soon as her older brother answered the door instead of her or at least her sister. He ignored his sweaty palms and the beads of sweat that dotted his forehead at the sight of her intimidating brother.
“Well, I just wanted to talk to Lucky” he tried to say smoothly but ended up stuttering.
“Lucky isn’t here and either way she doesn’t want to see you” Mikael said while attempting to close the door. Carter put his foot out to stop the door ignoring his glares.
“I just need to see her for two seconds” he pleaded with Mikael who sighed and called out Lucky’s name before shooting Carter one more glare and storming off.
After what seemed like an eternity, Lucky came bounding down the stairs gracefully. Carter’ breath hitched as he stared at her for the first time in three weeks, her hair had grown slightly so that her roots revealed her real hair colour which was dark brown, her brown eyes had lost some of its shine and by the looks of it, it was clear she had gotten just as much sleep as he did. Which was basically none but the most encouraging sight was that she was wearing the varsity jacket he had given her a few months ago along with the necklace he had given her for Christmas with the ‘C’ pendant. He unconsciously touched his ‘L’ pendant as well.
“What?” she asked when she stood in front of him. He blinked a few times and shook off the surprise he felt at her harsh tone.
“I came to apologize” he said. She sighed and indicated for him to come inside.
“There’s nothing to apologize for Carter” she said, sitting on a stool in the kitchen. “I’ve just been thinking.”
“About?” he prompted.
“Us. I think I overreacted when you called me Sarah. I know a part of you still loves her and I was wrong to think otherwise” Lucky said. Carter glanced up at her shyly to see her nervously playing with the hem of her shirt. He knew Lucky and she was never nervous so it was obvious it took a lot out of her to apologize to him.
“It’s okay. I think I’ve never really gotten into an argument with you but since Sarah was my girlfriend, naturally we did argue but at the end of the day I still loved her. Same way I love you” he whispered the last part, watching her closely for a reaction.
“Really?” she asked, giving him an uncertain look.
“Really” Carter confirmed, giving her a sincere grin. Just then he felt his cell phone vibrating in his pocket, he held up one finger to Lucky and answered his phone but immediately regretted it when he realized it was his mother calling.
“What do you want mom?” he asked, resisting the urge to roll his eyes when Lucky slapped his shoulder and told him to be nice.
“Did you not hear me when I told you we were coming back to take you to Washington?” his mother shrieked into the phone. He sighed and idly played with the button of his plaid shirt.
“Yes I heard you. But I told you I’m staying. I like it here” he said. He had almost forgotten about his mother’s phone call saying that her and his father were visiting in a few weeks to take him back to Washington but that had been the same day he had snapped at Lucky. His suitcase was half packed for his trip back to Washington but now that Nick had convinced him to stay and Lucky wasn’t mad at him anymore, he had every reason to stay.
He ignored Lucky’s curious stare and listened to his mother yell at him some more.
“Calm down. I started packing but I’m going to unpack. I’m not leaving” he told his mother in a calm voice which seemed to enrage her more.
“Will you listen to me please? Your father got a job in Italy. We’re moving back to Italy instead” his mother shouted. On a regular day, Carter would have been excited to be moving to the place where he was born but that day was different. He felt devastated. Maybe he could have handled being some states away from New York but he didn’t want an ocean between him and his best friends.
“What? No! I told you I’m over Sarah now but I still want to stay here!” he said, shouting at his mother now. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see Lucky piecing the whole conversation together and her eyes looked as if they were filled with unshed tears.
“This isn’t about Sarah anymore. This is about us being a family” his mother screamed back.
“Our family broke in half a long time ago” he said, lowering his voice but he knew Lucky could probably still hear him.
“Me and your father are on our way to New York now. Tomorrow we will be discussing this further” his mother said in a clipped voice before hanging up. Carter stared at his phone, not sure whether to throw it against the wall or break down.
“You’re moving?” Lucky’s voice brought him back to reality.
“No. I’m not” Carter said feeling a fierce determination. “We have to find a way to change my parents’ minds.”
“But how?” Lucky asked, cocking one eyebrow. Carter thought over her question for a moment and grinned.
“I have an idea” he said, before picking up his phone to call his parents.
It’s been a while
Btw guys! I have an idea for a short story (like 10 chapters), called Changing Carter which is basically Carter and Sarah’s story before she died, and Carter’s personality before he met Sarah and all that.
Anyway. My studies awaits!
Peace. Love and School