I told Signe that I wanted to be with her. I thought I sincerely did. When we were together, literally last night. When I felt her I didn't actually feel her. I didn't feel her heart. I didn't see anything no one else saw. I saw the skin layer that any man could see. That any person could easily strip away the clothes and see. But I hadn't stripped away who she perceives herself to be to see who she really was.
I saw that with Mark.
I could never see the end of this feeling. This never ending torture of making myself getting up everyday and saying three words to the wrong person.
Three words I wish I wouldn't have said to another person.
Someone who was snuggled up into me asleep when I used to snuggle up asleep to someone I actually loved.
And it hurt.
// im not finishing this book bc idk i don't like it !!