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07 // crisp bills and tablecloth.
I trudged up the stairs with both of my hands gripped tightly unto plastic bags. I set the bags in front of Mrs. Gonzales door and knocked. Seconds later, the door creaked upon and in front of me was the short Mexican lady; her silver hair a mop on her head.
"Iy Chica! Gracias gracias!" Mrs. Gonzalez exclaimed, taking the bags up. "My dear, I have something for you, you must come in!"
"For me?"
"Yes! Now come in!"
For as long as I've neighbored Mrs. Gonzalez, not once have I stepped foot inside of her house. All I ever heard from there was the loud blasting of latin music. Today though, it was quiet.
The strong smell of incents engulfed me as I stepped foot inside her apartment. The lights were dimmed except for a few lamps and candles. The place was colourful, though. The walls were white but paintings and other art covered every inch of it. Pottery bowls stood their place on coffee tables and several tribal rugs lay on the floor.
"Where is it?" Mrs. Gonzalez shouted out as she rummaged back and forth through her house. Finally, she came back out to the living room with something in her hand.
"This is for the baby," Mrs. Gonzales said, laying one of her frail hands on my growing baby bump. She closed her eyes and smiled to herself. Very weird if you asked me.
"Ahhh," She murmured to herself. "la belleza de vida."
I looked at the thing in her hand; it was some sort of doll.
"What is that?" I asked. "You said that you had something for me, not for the baby."
"I guess I got mixed up," she shrugged. "Muneca para el bebe."
I laughed nervously. "You bought a doll for the baby?"
"No, no, no! I did not buy this, no. This doll was passed down from generation to generation. I wasn't able to have any kids, and it's too late for me. This is for the baby."
"That's really kind of you, Mrs. Gonzalez, but I don't think giving me stuff for this baby is appropriate.." I trailed off.
I took the doll from her anyways.
"Eh, maybe you are right. Maybe the mother will let the baby keep it?"
"Yeah, maybe," I nodded. "I should get going now."
"I will see you soon, my dear," she said, waving me off.
.
.
I was slouched on the couch when my phone began to ring.
"Hey Lesra, are you still going?" Shay asked, her voice urgent.
"Err, going where?" I asked sitting up.
"My sisters wedding. Have you forgotten just that fast?"
I rolled my eyes, not really in the mood to go anywhere. "I haven't forgotten Shay."
"Good, because i'm right outside!" I could hear the loud honking of her Jeep through the window.
I stood up quickly, my feet ached in protest. I looked through the window to see what I presumed were Samuels arms waving through the rolled down window.
I sighed deeply. "Just give me twenty minutes," I pleaded.
"Jeez Lesra, hurry up! We're already as late as it is!"
I hung up the phone and quickly bathed and threw on a dress that was hung in the back of my closet.
The dress was a canary yellow strapless number that flowed down to my feet. I smiled at the way it framed my small but noticeable baby bump.
.
.
The wedding was held in a church on the more wealthier side of town. The church was grand with a tall ceiling and huge stained glass windows. Hundreds of people sat in benches facing the altar. The church was loud with chatter as people conversed with each other until the ceremony started.
My hands were moist with perspiration. Not only from the church being humid, but also because of the man seated beside me.
I hadn't thought ahead at all until I saw Shawna and Wren pull up to the church hand and hand. Of course Shawna would be there, her and Julie were best friends. What surprised me though, was Wren coming along also. In the last four months that I'd known the pair, he was always out working and they were barely with each other. I guess things have changed.
His shoulders were pressed against my own. There were so many people and not enough space to hold us all on the benches. I tried to scoot as far as I could away from him and when I had managed to have a few inches between us, I breathed out a sigh of relief. Right when I thought everything was okay, someone squeezed themselves on the other side of Wren, causing him to only come closer. His body turned toward me slightly and he moved his arm so that it was around my shoulders.
"What are you trying to do?" I asked, looking up at him. Our faces were only inches from each other.
"Don't over think it," he replied. "I'm trying to make space out of no space."
Just then, soft music began to play. Everyone stood and got quiet as one by one, the bridesmaids filed in along with the ring bearer and flower girl. Shay came out in a violet dress and her colorful hair in a elegant style. Shawna came out next in a matching dress and her red hair in a similar hairstyle as Shay.
"Your wife looks very beautiful," I murmured to Wren.
"She does," he simply stated.
Everyone stood up around us as the bride to be- Shays older sister slowly but gracefully walked in. In comparison, Shay and her sister Julie looked very much alike, However, Shay opted for more than one color for her hair and and Julies was a glossy brown shade.
We all sat down when Julie reached the altar. She looked gorgeous in a puffy white dress. The groom, David also looked handsome and sleek in a fitted black tux.
"My baby looks nice in that yellow dress," Wren whispered, his warm breath tickling my ear.
I looked at Shawna; her dress wasn't yellow... "Your what?" I replied just above a whisper.
"My baby," he repeated, as if what he was talking about was obvious. My body froze as his hand that wasn't already around my shoulders was lightly pressed against the baby bump.
If Wren had observed my sudden stiffness, he kept quiet about it.
Warmth radiated wherever his large hands- that were now moving in slow circular motions- touched the silky fabric of my dress. Something about it felt so weird to me. Maybe because the last time he'd touched me in such a calming manner was that night..
"Four months, eh?" He grinned. It was a good thing that we were in the back of the church because even I was too distracted to pay attention to the wedding.
"Were you actually keeping track or did Shawna have to remind you?"
"I care about my baby, Lesra. Why must you act like that?" He asked. He moved his hand from my stomach and let it rest on his lap.
"Act like what, asshole?"
"No cursing in the church. I thought your mum would have taught you better?"
I remained quiet. I had the sudden urge to curse him out but he didn't know anything about my mother. And, we were in a church.
The wedding ceremony ended and we all filed out of the church and onto the front lawn. Like a sappy romance movie, Shawna's red hair blew in the wind as she found her way into Wrens arms. They embraced passionately and I felt as if I was going to be sick.
"Being at this wedding reminds me of the day we got married, Warren. The best day of our lives, right?"
Wren nodded his head with a slight smile.
"And then when our baby comes," Shawna continued. "That day will top our wedding day."
"It will," Wren agreed, looking in my direction.
"Lesra!" Shawna exclaimed as if I wasn't there the whole time. She gathered me into a hug, the wind blew locks of her red hair into my mouth.
"Look who's showing!" Shawna laid both hands on my stomach. "It's so tiny but so round! Warren our baby is in there!" She looked to her husband who's attention was already on the growing bump.
"Yeah, it always amazes me how the female body works."
Shawna gave a forced smile. My heart ached for her that her body wasn't able to bear a child.
"So we should get going to the reception then," Wren suggested, wrapping an arm around his wife's waist.
"You're driving with us Lesra?" Shawna asked.
"I had actually planned to head there with Shay," I replied. I didn't like the idea of being in a car with the two of them.
"Well we'll see you there then!"
.
.
The music was loud and people were up and dancing at the reception party. With one hand securing my stomach, I danced for almost an hour until my feet began to kill me.
Wren, who was a party pooper didn't get up not once. Not even when Shawna begged and pleaded for him to join her for just one dance. Instead, he sat several tables down toying with the hem of the fancy table cloth.
One of Shay's family members, a woman with a long sleeved rhinestone dress passed by me. Her perfume was strong, making me sick to my stomach. Clutching my stomach, I hastily got up and made a break for the bathroom. My hand moved from my stomach to my mouth as I tried to hold back from vomiting.
I made it just in time as I emptied my stomach contents into the toilet bowl.
"Lesra," A deep British voice said from behind me. "Are you alright?" he asked concerned.
"Go away," I cried. "Don't come in here!"
Food continued to make its way up.
"It's my baby that's causing this."
He fit his large body into the tiny stall. I used my hands to push on his legs so he'd stumble backwards and out of the stall but my attempts were useless as he stood his ground.
"Wren please leave," I sobbed.
"I'm not going anywhere, love," he murmured. He scooped the hair out of my face and from my clammy neck. Gently removing the ponytail holder from my wrist, he did his best attempt at a ponytail. I laughed to myself, as I began to think of what the hair style looked like.
"Something funny?" He asked.
I shook my head and flushed the toilet. "I think I need to go home," I croaked.
I weakly got to my feet, the both of us standing in the stall. His tall frame hovered over mine. I looked down at his shiny black shoes. My breath probably smelled something serious. He didn't need to smell that.
"Can Shay or that other guy take you?" The way he said her name brought back memories of the day she slapped him. Ha!
I shrugged and pushed past him to get out of the stall. "This is her sisters wedding. I don't want to ruin her fun and the other guy, Samuel came along with her."
"I guess I'll just bring you then?"
"No, no, no no," I objected, holding my hands up. "Now this is Shawna's best friend I don't want to ruin the fun she's having."
"You're carrying our child, Lesra. I'm sure she won't mind." Wren explained, watching me through the mirror as I finished washing and drying my hands.
"I'll find a way home. I don't want to ruin your fun either."
"Right, because tracing the patterns on table cloth is my idea of fun," He explained, burying his hands in the pants of his tux. "Finish up in here and wait for me outside. I'll tell Shawna that i'm taking you home."
He backed out of the bathroom, giving me no space to give a fuss.
.
.
My canary yellow dress was strapless and the wind took full advantage of that as it whipped at my skin.
"Here," he murmured. The weight of his jacket pressed down on me as he draped it over my shoulders.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" I blurted out. I took a step back, still conscious of my breath.
"I don't want my baby to get cold. That's all."
I bit the inside of my cheek. I was stupid to mistake his sudden hospitality for more than what it really was.
"By the way, there's gum in the left jacket pocket."
Had he smelled my breath? Nonetheless, I reached for a stick of gum in the pocket.
"The cars this way."
"Right behind you," I replied, following him.
The parking lot was crowded with cars. The wedding reception was at some kind of resort that had a crystal blue lake beside it. Wren was a quiet walker the only noise came from the clacking of the heels I wore.
"Pregnant in heels. I'm surprised Shawna didn't have anything to say about that," Wren commented from in front of me.
We found his car and hopped in.
.
.
We pulled up outside of my house and I was relieved to be home.
"Your jacket," I had almost forgotten the warm thing was around me as I shrugged out of his coat.
"Keep it," Wren said, resting an arm on my shoulder to prevent me from taking it off.
"I'm not going to freeze from here to the front door," I joked.
"I'll get it tomorrow, yeah?" He chuckled.
I furrowed my eyebrows. "What's tomorrow? Are you.... coming over or something?"
He smiled. His hazel eyes were bright despite how dark it was out. "No, my niece is having a field trip at that art gallery you work at so i'll just get it then."
"Oh! Okay," I got out of the car and closed the door behind me. His car remained out front until I made it safely inside the apartment.
I buried my hands into the pockets of his jacket and cursed out loud when I felt the smooth leather material of his wallet. I turned back around but he was already down the street.
I entered my apartment with the wallet in hand. I tossed it up and down a bit, feeling its weight. I didn't mean to pry, but I found myself opening his wallet.
Stop.
stop.
Son't do it. He deserves his privacy.
Too late.
There were credit cards and his license. He shouldn't be driving without this!
Several bills, all crisp were lined up. A white piece of folded loose leaf paper was also with the bills.
Don't open it Lesra!
I was unable to stop myself as I unfolded the paper.
It was a sketch. A beautiful detailed drawing of a woman. It was a drawing of me.
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