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11 · The Bus Route Disclosure
Even as the fourth week of February flew by, the puzzle behind Joshua would never fail to cross my mind. There were times where I actually anticipated for the truth to be unveiled, but that was like waiting for a stubborn turtle to peek out of its shell. The discovery from the previous weekend seemed like it never happened.
Joshua Anderson mastered shutting out the people around him.
To be frank, it drove me nuts.
"Olivia? Did you hear what I said?" Mikaela popped my bubble of thoughts.
Snapping out of it, I forgot that I was in the middle of a conversation. Mikaela and I decided to meet up briefly after school since we had to stay for our own reasons. The stress of my film photography assignment was on my back, and I had to use the photo lab to print photos while Mikaela had cheer prep for her upcoming competition.
"What was that again?"
"My nails! Two of them chipped during practice yesterday."
A little relieved that I didn't miss a big point, I offered, "Don't worry. I can come with you to the salon tomorrow if you want."
Laughter escaped from Mikaela as she revealed, "You really weren't paying attention after all. I was asking you about Mr. Ortega's homework assignment, but I figured you were daydreaming about Joshua."
"Daydreaming?" My jaw dropped in bewilderment. "I wasn't daydreaming about him!"
Not buying my rebuttal, Mikaela nodded slyly. "Right. What has Joshua done to make my dear friend worry about him so much?"
As much as it would make sense to just tell Mikaela why, I couldn't because Joshua and I made an agreement. The fact that I witnessed him get hurt by a random group of three was what worried me. Since Joshua told me not to talk about it, I was starting to forget about that particular day. The moment Joshua reacted oddly to Mikaela's "punch" last Saturday, it caused those memories to resurface somehow.
All in all, I just hoped that I was only overanalyzing the entire situation.
I shook my head. "Nothing. Let's drop the topic. What was that about Mr. Ortega's homework?"
Mikaela indicated through a faint smile, "I'll text you later instead. I better get going to practice."
"Wait, Mikaela. I need to ask you something."
She nodded, keeping a careful gaze at me. "Okay, shoot."
Growing a little hesitant, I eventually revealed, "I've been noticing this since last week, but you and Trevor haven't been acting like, well, your usual selves. Did something happen?"
The once carefree expression on my best friend's face transitioned stiffly. Seeing this caused my fists to clench. Trevor better not had done something to Mikaela. If he did, he was going to regret it. I could promise him that. Glancing away momentarily, Mikaela resettled her blue-green eyes on me and cleared her throat.
"I haven't been very honest lately, but it's only because I've been so confused. I don't know what to do with Trevor," she sighed sadly, "Valentine's Day was great and all until Trevor wanted to… you know."
When Mikaela hesitated, I questioned, "Make love?"
For the lack of the obvious word.
Her eyes shifted right then left to examine if anyone was within our perimeter. Luckily, it was just us and another group of students who were too far away. Mikaela twisted several strands of her strawberry blonde hair and nodded her head.
There wasn't a second that passed before Mikaela clarified, "We didn't do it though. I couldn't. You know I'm not ready yet. When I told Trevor, he got all upset and annoyed that he just left me there. He hasn't been talking to me at all lately, and I've been seeing him with other girls. Olivia, was it wrong of me to say no? I mean, we have been dating for two years, but I'm still not ready."
As I listened to my friend, this sensation of anger was brewing inside of me. If I kept this up, I might explode like a volcano. What made me even more upset was capturing how Mikaela contemplated if her decision was wrong.
I tried my best to control my voice from raising because of Trevor's stupidity. "Mikaela, of course not. I don't care if he's been dating you for two, five, ten years! If Trevor really likes you, he wouldn't be angry or push you to do anything you don't feel comfortable with. It just makes me so mad that he's making you feel like it's your fault even though it's not. Tell me why I seem more upset than you?"
Mikaela let out an embarrassed chuckle. "You know how much I like Trevor, right? I can't stay mad at him."
"And you understand how much I love you, right? Trevor is being selfish. That's the last thing I want my best friend to deal with. You know, if Eric heard about this, he would —"
"Don't tell Eric or anyone."
I rose an eyebrow before I questioned why.
She fiddled with the trimming of her burgundy cheer bag and pursed her lips. "Eric doesn't like Trevor to begin with, and he hasn't been the friendliest to me lately. I don't even know what I did wrong, but please don't tell him."
That's because Eric has a big, fat crush on you, the thought urged to be spoken about.
In the end, I respected Mikaela's request because it wasn't my place to say. Once I agreed, Mikaela hovered over to hug me. As I embraced her back, she thanked me for listening and insisted that she could manage the situation. Even though I wanted to crush Trevor into pieces, the only thing I could do was offer my support to Mikaela. I didn't want to force help upon her, but she always knew that I would be there whether or not she needed me.
When we pulled away from the hug, Mikaela gave me a smile. "Thanks again. I really got to go to practice now."
I still bought up, "Can I still kick Trevor's ass for giving you such a shitty Valentine's Day?"
Mikaela let out a more happier laugh. Her mood became evidently brighter than earlier.
"That's why you're my best friend, Olivia."
+ + +
After a successful day at the photo lab, I thanked my photography teacher, Mrs. Garfield, for allowing a few of us an extra hour in the dark room. Once I gathered my belongings, I greeted her and my classmates a farewell before walking outside.
It was still bright, but the mild February wind welcomed me with its cool touch. Glancing at the time from the clock tower, I had thirty minutes until the next bus arrived. Since I had no other place in mind, I ended up walking to the bus stop which was a few blocks from my school to wait there.
Approaching the bus stop, I sat down and leaned back against the plastic backing of the makeshift bench. Though the bench wasn't the comfiest, at least there were still seats. For the mean time, I shuffled through my portfolio to make sure that I had everything in order.
After next week, it would already be March. Graduation was drawing close, and the photography contest would be just around the corner.
My attention was eventually taken away when I overheard my cellphone ringing. Picking it up from the bench, my mood drastically dropped when the caller ID was presenting my dad's name. Till this day, I was ignoring his calls.
Today must had been extra special because I actually had the patience to answer.
"Olivia? I've been trying to contact you for the past three weeks."
Coming up with an excuse, I answered nonchalantly into the receiver, "I've been busy with school. What do you need to talk about?"
"Well, I feel like we didn't end our recent conversation on a good note. I understand how important photography is to you, and it was careless of me to speak poorly about the scholarship. I apologize, but remember that I'm always here for you. How have you been?"
As touching as my dad's words sounded, I ended up rolling my eyes in response. The thing that amused me most was how my dad never failed to mention that he was "always there for me" even though his actions spoke otherwise.
Deciding to humor myself, I ended up going along with this conversation. "Yeah, Dad. I get it. I've been okay."
His voice relaxed. "That's good. Have you received the invitation?"
I asked in a naive tone, "What invitation?"
"To the Father-Daughter dance. We're going this year. Belinda even wants to take you dress shopping for the event. Doesn't that sound exciting?"
Nearly choking on my own spit, my dad had to be playing a joke on me.
In what world would dressing shopping with Belinda, of all people, sound exciting?
Staring blankly at the car occupied street in front of me, I sighed. "I don't know. How do I know you're not going to bail out this year?"
"I'm sorry I haven't taken you yet, but this year is different. I promise. We're going, and you're going to go dress shopping with Belinda tomorrow."
I snapped back, "Says who?"
"I really want to take you, Olivia. Please, that's all I ask."
Pursing my lips, I didn't want to go to the stupid dance, and I especially didn't want to go dress shopping with Belinda. Rolling in the mud for hours sounded more appealing than these options, to be honest.
As I sat there silently, there was this faint part of me that wanted to give my dad the benefit of the doubt. The feeling needed to back off, but as the seconds passed, the temptation was getting stronger and stronger. Shutting my eyes shut for a brief second, I hoped that I didn't just make the biggest mistake in my life.
"Fine."
"Great. I'll have Nigel pick you up at noon. Are you outside, by the way? I hear a bunch of cars."
Not wanting him to know that I was waiting for the bus, I always avoided telling him. My dad would always try to convince me that living with him and all his "benefits" would have been a better life for me. What antagonized me even more was whenever Belinda would hint how much she pitied my average life.
I lied, "I'm waiting for a friend. I'll talk to you later, Dad. Bye."
"Oh, all right. Take care, Olivia. I love you."
Ending the call, I dropped my cellphone to my side and closed my eyes.
Almost instantly, regret was starting to overflow me.
"Nurse Sandpaper, may I take this seat?"
My eyes shot back open, and the voice belonged to none other than the idiot who gave me that nickname.
Surprised by his sudden appearance, I glanced around because I could have sworn no one from my school was near my sight. Returning my attention back at Joshua, he wore an amused grin, and his green eyes twinkled at my reaction.
"When did you get here?" I asked with scrunched eyebrows.
"Not so long ago."
Turned out the guy didn't even need my approval because Joshua sat on the vacant spot of the bench to my right. As I looked at Joshua with the dumbfounded expression still on my face, I couldn't believe how mellow he was — like it was normal to appear out of nowhere.
Once I asked Joshua what he was doing here because I didn't ever recall him taking this route before, his green eyes gazed dully into mine.
"Riding the bus."
"No, duh. What I'm trying to say is, you just popped out of nowhere. What do I owe this honor?"
A more teasing grin surfaced on Joshua's face. "You just love explanations, don't you? I just finished practice with Beverly a while ago. When I was walking to the bus stop, I found you here with your eyes closed. Call it, a favor from the lucky stars."
I rolled my eyes. "A favor from the lucky stars? You mean, stalker status. How was practice with Beverly?"
"Whatever," Joshua's smug grin faded. "It was okay. She's good at the violin, but I'm better at the piano. My turn to ask. What are you still doing here? School was out two hours ago."
"Careful now, Smiley Idiot. Your narcissism is showing." I laughed until Joshua shot me a cold look. "I had photography stuff to catch up on. Did you hear anything earlier by any chance?"
"I'd be lying if I said no."
"Well, you do love to eavesdrop on my conversations."
"Last time I checked, you do too. Guess we're even," Joshua threw back a rebuttal.
Reciprocating the same kind of glare back at Joshua, he now had a proud grin on for his victory. Shaking my head, I gathered my belongings so it wasn't so scattered around on the bench.
As I busily attended my things, Joshua managed to break the silence. "You don't seem to enjoy the conversations with your dad very much."
I let out a humorless laugh before I zipped my backpack shut. "That's an understatement. I don't like talking about it."
"I can tell."
Even though Joshua said that with no intentions, it still bothered me. I didn't know where this abrupt annoyance grew from inside of me.
All of a sudden, I found myself flicking my hair away so I could face him. "What about you, Joshua? You always avoid everything. Even something so simple like, what happened to your arm?"
I snapped my mouth shut right after as his green eyes instantly shifted in an icy manner.
"You want to know something? You can be a brat sometimes," Joshua spat out before he turned away and folded his arms.
Huffing, I was lost for words.
Moving to the farthest end of the bench, I allowed my lips to fall into a frown as I dropped my stuff onto my lap. It frustrated me because no one asked him to comment about my relationship with my dad. Joshua had no right to call me a brat because he would never understand what my dad has done in the past. Just reminiscing over that time started unintentional tears to form in my eyes.
However, I had enough strength to blink them away. It wasn't worth it.
As soon as the bus finally pulled over to our stop, I didn't hesitate to grab everything and storm inside. Disappointed to see that Mr. Martin wasn't doing the route today, I still waved to the female bus driver before sliding my card and found a seat towards the far right of the bus.
Taking a seat, I eventually saw Joshua's reflection as I glanced out the bus window to observe the scenery.
"Olivia, I'm sorry."
I didn't respond.
"Come on. I know you can see me from the window."
Letting out an exasperated sigh, I shifted and answered bluntly, "What are you sorry for?"
His green eyes had softened from earlier and expressed apology. "As much as I come off as a jerk — believe it or not — by the end of the day, I see you as my friend. And, you're right. I don't talk about certain things, but that's because you don't know my situation. Just like how I don't know your situation with your dad. I'm sorry, it won't happen again."
While I was listening to Joshua, the bus driver announced that the doors would be closing soon. At this rate, Joshua would be flying across the bus if he stayed standing.
"Just take a seat before I changed my mind," I sputtered out.
From the corner of my eyes, there was a closed grin on Joshua's face as he sat down.
Throughout the bus ride, the air of silence was begging for one of us to speak up.
As I was about to start up a conversation, Joshua must have gotten the memo and went ahead. "How about we do that thing we did last weekend — the one where we reveal something about ourselves?"
Without waiting for a reply, Joshua kept his stare away from me and confessed, "You remember what I said last weekend? About the kids I live with? I don't live with my real parents. I… actually don't know much about them. All I know is that Roselle took me in as her own. Grandma Winnie, her mother, also helped raise me and my adopted siblings."
Letting his words soak in, I wasn't expecting this kind of reveal from Joshua.
It opened a new door for me. No wonder the children Joshua lived with weren't blood related. No wonder he asked why my relationship with my dad was so messed up. Joshua never got the chance to interact with his birth parents. This revelation made me understand his perspective a little bit more.
Joshua fixed his emerald green eyes at me and lightly suggested, "You don't have to comment about it. Your turn. Doesn't have to be about family, say anything."
After a quiet minute, I exhaled slowly before disclosing, "You want to know why I need to win this competition so badly? Other than not getting the scholarship at Remy's and for my future, I feel like I wasted two years if I didn't. Instead of taking an internship, I could have found a job and earned money to help my mom. She's always working hard. I don't like seeing her so tired. I just want her to relax and not have to worry about me."
Allowing my eyes to wander off, I needed to prove myself with this competition.
If it was the last thing I had to do.
I heard Joshua convince, "You shouldn't regret taking the internship. Photography is something you like to do, right? I'm sure your mom understands and supports you."
Surprisingly, his words did help ease the solemn mood.
"I hope you're right, Joshua. Listen, I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier. You can be even more bratty, you know that?"
Joshua let out a chuckle, but it wasn't exactly filled with humor. This made me start to wonder what else Joshua Anderson kept to himself. From what I noticed, he wasn't the type to open up so freely. I was still stunned that he told me about his family life.
I then added in a hushed voice, "I know it's not my place to say, but I can relate to you about not knowing a parent… even if it's through different circumstances. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too," Joshua nodded before he advised, "you shouldn't worry about me though. It's pointless. Just focus on the contest and your mom."
The thing was, I did start to care about Joshua.
There wasn't a specific time that I could think back to when, but I just did. To say that my concern towards him was "pointless" was an insult to himself. Wanting to bring that up, my attention was anchored off when the bus was pulling over to my stop.
Informing Joshua that I was getting off here, he stood up as well. "I'll walk you home. It's… not safe right now."
Carrying my bag, I protested from amusement, "It's, like, four in the afternoon. I'm okay, you don't have to play gentleman. You should get back home too."
Yet, my thick skulled locker buddy didn't inch away.
After a ten-second staring contest, I didn't want the bus to drive off, so I gave in and allowed him to come along. Once we got off the bus, I looked back and caught Joshua preoccupied with his cell phone. His eyebrows were knitted tightly as if he was reading something serious.
Pretending that I didn't notice, I cleared my throat. "You ready?"
Joshua only nodded in response before slipping his phone into the back pocket of his jeans.
Throughout the walk back home, I realized there was always this constant cycle of silence. There had to be something on Joshua's mind because his gaze was lost. At the same time, I felt bad that Joshua was taking me home even though it was completely unnecessary.
I brought up, "You didn't have to do this."
His green eyes then jumped onto me. "Well, I wanted to."
Joshua left it at that.
Nodding as I pressed the crosswalk button, I didn't bother to argue back because Joshua was already here.
Due to the alley way incident, I came up with another route back home. Though the route was much longer, I would rather walk more than go back seeing the creepy alley. Just recalling back to when I went through that alley in attempt to save Joshua from the unknown trio would always send a cold chill to sliver up my spine.
However, I didn't expect Joshua to actually notice.
"You don't walk pass the alley, right?" he questioned, taking in our surroundings.
"Not anymore."
For some reason, my eyes must have been playing games on me because relief had suddenly spread across Joshua's face upon hearing that. Now that I thought about it, I would have been next on the trio's hit list because of my stunt.
When I asked Joshua if the three males ever came back to bother him, Joshua shook his head before he shoved his hands into his black hoodie.
"They were just a bunch of low lives looking for trouble," his voice grew deeper as he said, "promise me you won't go back to the alley again."
Unsure with the tone of Joshua's voice about the three guys, I didn't hesitate to say, "Trust me, I never planned to."
A satisfied grin stretched on Joshua's lips.
We passed by the convenience store I used as a landmark to indicate that I was close to home. Occasionally, Joshua's arm would graze along mine while we walked. For a while, Joshua had been bundling himself up in hoodies and jackets. Even though the season's weather was still chilly, I didn't recall Joshua wearing much long sleeves since I first met him.
I spilled, "Are you ever going to tell me what happened to your arm?"
Glancing over my shoulder, I raised my eyebrows when I found Joshua drowning in his thoughts. His green eyes stayed away from mine for a while which only kept me thinking more. When I fully turned around to face him, Joshua snapped out of it and finally settled his attention back at me.
"Olivia, what did I say earlier?"
I bought up, "Well, I didn't have a chance to say to you that maybe I don't find any of it pointless. What happened?"
At the moment, his eyes clouded up in retreat. "Drop it, please."
Joshua's reply made it clear that this would be left unsaid unless he wanted to talk about it. I knew we were both growing tired of each other throwing questions back and forth.
I carefully requested, "At least tell me you're being taken cared of."
Not only was I referring to his arm, but the scar by his eye that managed to blend with his skin tone.
Joshua ended up laughing a bit to his amusement. "I can take care of myself. If it's bothering you so much, my mom takes very good care of me. Even though we don't share the same blood, she's still my mom."
Replying back with a nod, I felt a little more relaxed.
"Thanks," he then added.
Puzzled, I asked, "For what?"
"For asking if I was alright. A lot of people usually just want to know the details, but it's refreshing to hear someone ask about my well being."
"The perspective on the world isn't just curiosity, people care about their surroundings too," I mentioned before sharing smiles with him.
Catching the familiar outline of my house as we entered the quiet neighborhood, I pointed out that we were here. Joshua soon fixed his attention at my small home, and I had no idea what was going through his mind. Sure, it wasn't the biggest of houses, but I loved my house's character and being able to live with my mom.
"I know it's not that great, but this is home to me."
"No, it looks comfortable," he must have noticed my slight discomfort and changed the topic. "Do you have any plans this weekend?"
"Dress shopping, and I better start going over the photos for the contest," I announced with little enthusiasm because of the dress shopping I wasn't looking forward to.
Joshua stated with complete confidence only because the photos were of him, "Those photos don't need any editing. They're perfect."
"I actually want to have a fighting chance," I teased while Joshua threw a glare at me. I followed to ask, "Any plans for you?"
"I'll be working," Joshua proceeded to look at his phone before announcing, "I better get going."
"Are you going to be okay going back home?"
He opposed, "I should be the only one asking that question."
"Hey, I'm still intact. Will you just tell me when you get home?"
"Why?"
"Just cause."
"Is it going to make you sleep better at night or something?" he teased.
Gritting my teeth, I insisted, "Just tell me when you get home!"
Disbelief started to reflect in his emerald green eyes, and his lips parted briefly. "Are you being serious?"
I nodded.
"You're ridiculous," Joshua claimed before a grin surfaced. "Fine. Have a good weekend, Olivia."
"You too, Smiley Idiot."
Opening my front door, I waved to Joshua before I headed completely inside. For the time being, I occupied my desk as I attempted to finish as much homework as possible before the weekend lingered. Since I knew Saturday would be long and torturous with Belinda, I had to get my calculus homework out of the way to put off some of the work load.
Losing track of time, my attention was taken away when my phone beeped. Using my tired, writing arm to reach for it, it ended up being a text from Joshua.
Smiley Idiot 5:31 pm
Back safe and sound, Nurse Sandpaper. You can finally sleep peacefully. :) If you want to avoid dress shopping, you can always swing by the café.
Releasing a laugh from Joshua's text as I shook my head, his offer didn't sound like a bad idea to be honest.
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Dedicating this to Trish because she’s one of the sweetest gals here on Wattpad and a talented writer on top of that. You couldn’t ask for a better combination. Thanks for reading and supporting my stories, it means everything. <3