Sleep came easier than I thought. I guess, I just love sleep! But the sleep I do have is filled full of horrific nightmares that are unwanted.
I saw hundreds of different scenes while I was in about a six hour sleep. Each of them bringing new fears to the surface. I saw my mother die in front of my eyes. I watched Snow personally claw out Corrin's eyes with his abnornmally long fingernails. I watched all the tributes kill me in twenty three different ways, each worse than the last.
As I get up the morning of the arena, I shake my head from those images and try to keep my tears at bay. It doesn't work as a few tears stain my cheeks. Angry at myself, I wipe them clean with a little too much force.
I fling myself in the shower and have the last proper clean wash for a while. If I ever make it that long. For all I know, I could be going home. Just in a wooden box.
I get out the shower, get dried and throw on some clothes that are left out. They aren't the ones I'll wear in the arena, I'll get them later.
I stumble out of my room for the last time and walk to the dining room.
"Good morning Johanna." Even Una's voice is somber and holds hurt inside.
I look up at her made up face and I see those tell tale bloodshot eyes. She's been crying.
"Morning." I try to be on my best behaviour, I don't want to make matters worse between us.
We haven't exactly had the best friendship going.
I sit down and eat whatever is shoved my way.
"Where are they?" I nod to the two empty seats across from me.
Blight nor Cade is here yet.
"They've gone already." Una shrugs.
"What?"
"They. Have. Gone. To. The Hovercraft." Una says slowly.
That damn bitch. Forget everything I said about being on my best damn behaviour.
"I'm not stupid, bitch."
"That's it! Get out of my sight! I was trying hard to have a civil conversation but clearly you don't want that! Get out and go to the ground floor, someone is waiting for you!" Una snaps, shaking the table so the drinks spill everywhere.
Idiot.
I huff as I get up and leave. Muttering some words that shouldn't be repeated under my breath, I head towards the elevator. And it dawns on me.
I wasn't really bothered about the games. If I die, I die. There is nothing I can do. I'm not scared of what lies ahead. Why should I be? There is nothing I can do to stop it. But thinking about this, I am scared.
There I said it. I'm fucking terrified.
I could be dead in a matter of hours in the bloodbath. I could be shot by a freak from another district. I could be dying from lack of hydration.
And there is nothing I can do to prevent it.
My legs start to turn into jelly as I stand and wait to get to the ground floor. My mind is still whizzing as it dings open.
I walk slowly towards Lila. My stylist, who had chosen to wear the worlds ugliest dress today.
Let's give her a round of applause, ladies and gentlemen!
"Ah Johanna! Cade and Blight have already left on the first hovercraft. We are on the second. I take it you said your goodbyes?" She messes around with her fingernails, taking no notice of me whatsoever.
I actually want to scream 'I'm here dumbass'. But I don't.
"Well-" I start only to be cut off.
"That's nice dear."
Anger boils inside me. That bitch didn't even let me finish!
I cross my arms over my chest and seal my lips closed.
"Hovercraft two is boarding. Hovercraft two is boarding." An automatic voice calls out.
"Come on, Johanna." Lila drags me by the crook of my elbow over to the platform where a few other tributes are waiting nervously.
They begin to board the huge silver hovercraft. I don't want to say it, but it's beautiful. The silver reflects everything around it and is cleaned to perfection. It looks brand new.
My feet start to walk over to the stairs in which will take me inside this metal monster.
"I'll see you there Johanna." Lila walks over to where all the other stylists are chatting. Not caring that their tributes are walking to their own death beds.
"Great." I whisper under my breath.
I'm at the foot of the stairs and I stand next to a peacekeeper.
"Arm please."
Obediently, I hold out my arm and she injects some pale purple liquid into my arm.
"What is that?"
"Sleep syrup with a tracker. The flight is a long time. Up you go now."
I being to feel drowsy as the syrup begin to get into my system. I feel my eyelids droop and my body turn slack before the whole world turns black before my very eyes.
**
"Cry Baby! Wake up!" An angry voice calls out, giving me a nudge.
I shoot straight up, leading me to bash my head against the chair. I look to where the voice came from.
Oh look. It's Bitchface.
I shoot her my middle finger.
"Could you leave in an orderly fashion please. No fighting just yet!" A automatic voice almost screams.
I slap my hands over my ears as I exit the hovercraft.
Some creep grabs my arm and I whip it backwards.
"Johanna, it's me!" Blight chuckles.
"Sorry."
"Is Johanna Mason apologising? To me?" Blight feigns shock.
"Asshole."
He rolls his eyes before taking me to another elevator.
"Let's go get you ready."
"How is Cade?" I ask, biting at my nails.
A freaking annoying habit that I can't break.
"Scared. How are you?" He replies.
"I'm fine."
He nods as I hear the usual ding. I climb out.
"Aren't you coming?" I ask Blight who shakes his head.
"Good luck Sunshine. See you in a couple of days! And by the way, I'm waiting for my hug once you win." Blight kisses the top of my head, gives me a squeeze before I'm escorted away by peacekeepers.
The corridors are dimly lit and the walk is long.
I bloody hate walking.
Soon enough, we reach a room where the peacekeeper opens the door.
"You have seven minutes before launch. Good luck and may the odds be ever in your favour."
I walk into the room and Lila is sat on a settee with a glass of what looks like wine in her hand.
"Get changed." She throws her hand in a vague direction.
I search the room to find a box of clothes. I throw them on.
"Looks like your in a hot climate." Lila comments as I look at the outfit in the mirror.
It's an all in once piece with tiny holes near the arms and down my sides for breathing space. The outfit is white in colour and is snug on.
I look like a giant marshmallow.
"Three minutes!" A mans voice calls out from a speaker, letting us know I could be dead in couple of minutes.
"Well Johanna. You've been an okay tribute. I'll be sorry to see you die." Lila comments, reaching round me for a hug.
I throw my arms in front of me, pushing her away.
"Fuck off Lila. I'm not going to die. And bitch, I hope you choke on your wine."
"Two minutes!"
Lila's mouth drops open.
"Oh and Lila. Close you mouth, don't want to catch flies."
Lila storms off and out the door.
"Please get into the tubes."
My feet start to walk towards the glass cylinder that could take my directly to my death. I stand in the cylinder and the door shuts behind me.
"Good luck Johanna Mason of District 7. May the odds be ever in your favour." His voice calls out again as the plate begins to rise.
Oh fuck.
Oh fuck.
Oh fucking fuck fuck.
The sunlight streams into my eyes and the count down begins.