"I got burgers!" Stella came through the front door of the house. Everybody was sitting around the living room, ready to watch TV.
"Lil, napkins!" Freddie said. Lil headed to the kitchen. Stella started handing out the burgers.
"Only ketchup?"
"Me!"
"Onions and jelepinos?"
"Me!"
"Who's this?" Vin asked, sitting down on the couch.
"This is Kyle," Lil said, motioning to Kyle.
"Hi Kyle! I like that watch, how much was that?" Vin asked. Kyle didn't get a chance to answer before the show came on.
"Shhh!" Freddie shushed them as it started. It was a show about fishing or something.
Meanwhile, at the Alibi, everybody was watching a wrestling show on TV, shouting and cheering. Franc was trying to watch but a woman's head was in the way. And that woman, was Edie Jackson.
"Yo! Can you move your fat ass head out the way? I'm tryna watch!" Franc yelled. The woman turned around and smirked.
"Gallagher?" She walked up to Franc. Franc smiled. Edie reached her fist back and socked Franc right in the nose, so that she fell to the floor.
"Tell your girl Isla to keep her filthy cunt away from my Kyle!" Edoe yelled, towering over Franc. Franc clutched her nose and groaned. Fucking Isla.
Back over at the house, they were still watching the fishing show when Franc came in, blood from her nose smeared across her face and shirt. When they heard her come in, they all turned around to see her.
"Woah. You okay Franc?" Stella asked. Franc continued to walk to the kitchen, until Isla got up from the couch and stopped her.
"Is that my shirt?" She asked.
"Yeah," Franc replied. She walked closer to Isla as she backed away.
"I-I'm just asking," Isla stuttered, before Franc reached her fist back and punched her in the nose, just like Edie did to her. Everybody started screaming and cursing at Franc. Derek was about to hit her with a frying pan before Lil stopped him.
"Lady in the bar said to pass it on," Franc said to Isla, who had fallen onto the coffee table. Stella got up and walked towards Franc.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" She screamed.
"Jesus Christ, mom," Freddie said, looking at Isla's nose.
"You're drunk Franc! You're drunk!" Stella yelled.
"This is drunk? You wanna see drunk?!" Franc argued.
"Don't do this to your kids!" Stella yelled back.
"What are you, a tough chick, Stella? You think you're fucking intimidating? Because you look like a slut! And nothing more!" Franc yelled. Stella pounced at Franc, before Freddie held her back.
"Stella! Calm down! Stop!" He yelled.
"I have to go! I can't be around this bitch!" Stella yelled, walking out the front door.
"Pussy!" Franc yelled behind her.
"We need ice!" Vin yelled, who was tending to Isla's bloody nose.
"It's a bloody nose, she's not dying. Anybody notice that I'm bleeding too?" Freddie glared at Franc. Franc walked to the kitchen and cleaned up the blood all over her face. Freddie walked in and leaned against the door frame. Franc turned around looked at him. He motioned to the living room, where Isla was still layed down and bleeding.
"Okay. Okay okay okay,"
...
Lil was rolling a joint in her room when Isla came in to change.
"You should've hit her back," Lil said, looking up at her.
"If I ever do I'll fucking kill her," Isla replied.
"So? Eight to ten for manslaughter, get laid as often as you want, tattoos and everything," Lil laughed. "It'd be lesbo heaven," Lil passed her the joint and lit it up for her. Isla took a puff and sighed.
...
The next morning, Derek, Carly and Lil were sitting at the table cutting coupons. Isla came in and set down a bunch of food she had stolen from the delivery guy.
"Don't forget Vin's coupons!" Derek said as Isla left to go deliver the coupons to Vin. Freddie came down the stairs with Lacy and grabbed the mail of the mat. He walked into the kitchen and set Lacy down.
"Any pizza left from last night?" Isla asked as she came in the kitchen.
"No pizza, fruit or juice. And we've got eggs," Freddie replied.
"Pop tarts, frosted flakes, bisquick, Heinz ketchup and oh! Even a couple of two for ones for Tide," Derek listed off the coupons.
"Any coupons for meat?" Isla asked.
"Yeah, they got a special on ground chuck at Costco, and hot pockets," Derek replied.
"That's we'll go tomorrow," Freddie said as he kept looking through the mail. He looked up.
"Lil, you seen Franc?" He asked.
"Uh, no," she replied.
"What day is it?" Freddie asked.
"Friday, why?" Lil said. Freddie went up the stairs and started looking for Franc. There was a knock at the door and Isla answered it.
"Morning, campers!" Stella came through the door with coffees and donuts. "I got jelly, plain and glazed," Freddie came down and sighed.
"Great. I'm trying to get them to eat a healthy breakfast," he said.
"I bought all the essential food groups; caffeine, sugar and lard," Stella replied. Freddie leaned in to whisper to her.
"Sorry about last night," he said.
"Never apologise for your parents. Believe me, I don't," Stella replied. Freddie looked over at the,.
"Has anybody seen mom?" He asked. Derek looked up.
"She was asleep behind the arm chair," he said. Freddie sighed and walked into the living room. Everybody got up and followed him. Freddie leant over the arm chair and looked behind it.
"It's a tent," he held up the tent.
"What is a tent doing in the living room?" He asked.
"Drying it out. Got athletics camp next week," Isla replied.
"I thought it was mom. I left her a cup of coffee this morning. I thought I heard her say thanks," Derek picked up the mug and took it into the kitchen. Freddie walked out of the house and over to Kel and Vin's. He came in the back door and walked into the bedroom. He was startled to hear the sound of them having sex.
"Oh shit. Sorry, I came in the back way," he said as he covered his eyes.
"You're not the only one," Kel laughed.
"Kel, was mom at The Alibi last night?" Freddie asked.
"Uh, yeah. She was hammered! I'm talkin' hold-on-to-the-grass-so-you-don't-fall-off-the-earth hammered!" Kel exclaimed.
"Did you see her at last call?" Freddie asked.
"No. Which is pretty weird because she usually hangs out to sink the other drinker's dregs," Kel replied.
"Thanks," Freddie left and Vin and Kel went back to fucking. Freddie went back into his house.
"You okay?" Stella asked, walking up to him.
"I think mom's missing," he replied.
...
Everybody was sat in the living room, ringing everybody Franc knows to find out if they've seen her. Vin was talking on the phone when it was yanked out of his hand and out the window.
"What the fuck?" He looked out the window to see the phone being dragged towards his house.
"Motherfucker," he chased the phone down the sidewalk and caught it in front of his house. Kel held it up and gave him a weird look.
"Wendy Wendy, you still there?" He put the phone to his ear. "Oh, you didn't? Okay. Yep, thanks anyway. No! Really? Know if its a boy or a girl yet?" Kel shut off the phone.
"Where's my cell?" She asked.
"I leant it to Lil so we could all call around and find out where Franc is," Vin replied.
"Great! So now both my bills are being run up over there," Kel said sarcastically.
"Your bills? I work my ass off around here, not just you," Vin exclaimed.
"Well, there's the computer. Don't let me stop you, its after 10, get to work!" Kel motioned to the computer.
"Franc is missing! Oh, and you need to see somebody. Most girls listen to Beyoncé and Rihanna, but not Kel, oh no!" Vin yelled.
"Why can't they get their own fucking phone?!" Kel yelled.
"No money!" Vin yelled back.
"Yeah well me neither at this rate! Bye!" Kel yelled as she left for work. Vin started setting the camera up. He took off his clothes and got ready to film. He started jacking off at the camera, making noises, and doing whatever he had to do. (I'd rather not go into detail)
Meanwhile, back at the house, everybody was shutting off their phones.
"Anything?" Freddie asked.
"Nobody's seen her since last night," Isla replied.
"Oh no!" Derek cried.
"It's okay, we're gonna find her. It's gonna be okay," Freddie said. "Let's split up, all the regular spots, okay?" Freddie said as the raced out the door. They all began searching in the regular spots. Lil and Kyle looked in alleys, Carly and Derek searched motel rooms and the drycleaners, Isla looked on the streets and in porta-pottys and Freddie went to file a missing person's report.
"You can't file a missing person's report on Franc," Terri said when Freddie asked.
"Why not?" Freddie asked.
"Franc is always missing," Terri replied.
"That's what I said," Stella added. "She's probably just sleeping it off at a friend's place,"
"Franc hasn't got any friends. Who would give her a bed?"
"Come on Freddie, we've found him in dumpsters, garbage trucks, Mrs Lutski's bathtub," Terri said.
"Never on the last Friday of the month," Freddie said, seriously.
"What does Friday have to do with anyth-"
"It's the last Friday?" Freddie nodded.
"I'll call my watch commander," Terri picked up the phone and started dialing.
Meanwhile, at The Alibi, Lil and Kyle were returning Kel's cell phone.
"You can shove your phone up your ass," Lil remarked, throwing the phone across the bar. "No more freebies from me like doing your taxes because you can't understand the instructions!"
"Whoa, whoa whoa! Take it easy, all right? Look, Franc is never far, okay? She never goes far," Kel said.
"I know, but it's the last Friday of the month," Lil replied.
"Last Friday? So what?" Kel asked. "Disability check day," Kel answered her own question. "Jesus. Fuck me. Hey Joe! Franc Gallagher, did she leave with anybody when we kicked her out?," Kel asked the other bartender.
"Name me one person who would be caught dead with her in that condition," Joe replied.
"And Stella was definitely gone by then, so Franc wasn't with her," Kel added. "Anybody seen Franc the plank?" She yelled out.
"Which Stella?" Lil asked.
"Stella, as in Freddie's Stella," Kel replied.
"In here?" Kyle asked.
"Yeah, talking to Franc. Friendly enough, I mean it was hours before closing," Kel replied. Lil and Kyle nodded and walked out, confused as to why Stella was there talking to Franc. Kel looked up to the TV and saw that a body had been found over by Halstead Station.
"Is that over by Halstead Station?" She asked Joe.
"Yeah, I broke my collarbone falling down those station steps. It was after my very first taste of another man's tongue," he replied. Kel rushed out of the bar.
...
"Mom never misses this check. She waited on the corner and practically tackles the mail man before he can get out of the jeep," Freddie said as they were talking to Vin, who was filming another porno.
"We don't know anything' happened," Stella added.
"All those ODs and times he passes out on the El tracks," Vin said. Isla came in.
"Freddie, its Derek. He needs you. It's bad," she said. Freddie and Stella rushed out, following Isla.
"Derek, it's going to be fine," Freddie said to Derek as he was telling them what happened.
"I was talking to Henry Herkimer, and he said he saw a body under the tracks on Halstead!" Derek exclaimed. "He said it, its true! Mom's dead!" He cried.
"It's not her, Derek, or the police would have contacted us by now," Stella said.
"Derek, its Henry, okay? He's been in the third grade for four years. I'm going to deck that little shit!" Freddie said.
"Does that even make sense Derek? Why would your mom be over in Halstead when she lives in the other direction?" Stella said, bending down. Lil and Kyle came through the door.
"Well that depends. How was she looking when you left her at The Alibi Room last night Stella?" Lil said, folding her arms. Freddie stood up.
"When?"
"Uhh, ten, ten thirty. I went to apologise, bought her a drink, then went home," Stella replied.
"Why didn't you say?" Freddie asked. Kel came in.
"Hey, can I talk to you for a sec? They found a body under the El,"
...
Everybody raced up to the El. Freddie ran up to a policeman.
"Do you know who that is?" He yelled.
"Just stay back, okay, stay back," the policeman said. Everybody waited and waited, until somebody rolled over the body and revealed that it wasn't Franc. Everybody cheered and clapped.
"See? I told you," Stella said.
"Well then where the hell is she?" Freddie said.
...
Franc sat up. She looked around and immediately realised she was no longer on the south side of Chicago. There was snow on the floor, and she was freezing. She lit up a cigarrette and noticed two joggers.
"Have you got the time?" She asked them. They looked at her and quickly ran away. Franc looked over at all the buildings and trees. She realised where she was. Canada.
...
"How the hell did I end up in Canada?" Franc yelled from her jail cell. "I hate fucking Canada!"
"Keep it down in there!" The cop yelled.
"I'm an American! Apple pie? Lower 48? Air supply?" Franc continued to yell
"If you're an American, where's your passport?!" The officer yelled.
"I don't have one! I told you, I never had a passport. I don't want a passport,"
"Shut up and sleep it off,"
"Why would I wanna come to Canada? So your national health care can make me wait 60 days for a new kidney?! Your whole country's a bunch of parka-wearing, draft-dodging, chicken shit cowards who didn't have the balls to stay home and fight the Vietcong to preserve our American way of life! No snow at the Winter Olympics?! What the hell was that?" The cop was silent until he started singing the Canadian national anthem, just to piss Franc off.
...
"Canada? How?" Freddie asked, after the polic had told him that Franc was in Canada," Terri handed Freddie a report.
"Embassy says she admitted to drug charges, but that's before they accused him, so they think she's a juicer," she said.
"They charge her?" Stella asked.
"They just want her off Canadian soil as soon as possible, but the US won't let him back in without her passport," Terri replied.
"Franc doesn't have a passport," Freddie added.
"She'll gave to apply for one,"
"How long does that take?" Lil asked.
"Usually a couple months,"
"Months!?"
"She can apply for an emergency one at the embassy in Toronto," Terri suggested.
"How long does that one take?" Freddie asked.
"Usually about a week," Terri replied.
"Kel has a passport," Vin said.
"What good does that do?" Kel asked.
"You could drive up there, help him at the embassy," Vin replied. Freddie got up and walked to the kitchen while Kel and Vin were arguing. He opened the cupboard and took out the bin, shaking everything out of it.
"You okay?" Stella came in.
"How'd you get my mom to Toronto?" Freddie asked.
"Me? Are you kidding?" Stella laughed.
"Canadian health warnings," Freddie threw Stella the Canadian health warnings containor he found in the bin.
"I smuggles her over the boarder in the trunk of my car," Stella confessed.
"How'd you get her in the trunk?"
"She was so plastered she would have jumped into a coffin!"
"Why Canada?"
"I had to run a car to Detroit. Plan was to dump her someplace weird in Michigan. Flint maybe. But when I saw the signs for Toronto, the idea kind of just....snowballed," Stella replied. Freddie walked towards her.
"So what? Because she took a swing at you?" Freddie asked.
"No, because she has a family that she doesn't give a shit about! Smashing Isla in the face?!" Stella replied.
"What my mom is, what my family is has fuck-all to do with you! You left her there, you get her back!" Freddie yelled.
A/N: Hey guys! Sorry if i took a bit long to update. Please tell me what you think! Comment and vote!