April 22
Ren Asai.
The bane of Hanae's existence.
That woman was beyond infuriating and Kyoya's attitude towards her didn't help. Hanae tried to bring it up again after the first incident but he completely brushed her off, saying that Ren Asai, was nothing more than a childhood friend... that was his one-sentence explanation.
Hanae rolled her eyes and took out a bottle of white nail polish from her drawer. She was trying to paint her toenails but she stopped when she realized her hands were shaky.
She took a deep breath and leaned her head back on her white couch, she was getting anxious again... she really wanted to smoke.
She couldn't drive herself anywhere without an escort and she was too ashamed to ask any of the employees if they could bring her some cigarettes. So here she was, shaking because she couldn't handle her anxiety.
She laid on her couch for what felt like an eternity, trying to calm down and rearrange her thoughts. She was so engulfed in her thoughts that it took her a moment to realize that Kyoya had walked into her room.
She felt every muscle in her body tense up when she saw him walk in, and she instantly shot up to her feet.
"What do you want?" She began picking up her things off from the couch in a hurry, but her stupid hands kept shaking, and she quickly ran to put her things down in her drawer.
"My brother's coming." He mumbled setting a hand down on her vanity, and she frowned.
"Yuuichi?" She shielded her hands.
He nodded and he paused for a moment before continuing, "Takara's coming with him."
She jerked her head over to him, a hopeful look on her face, and Kyoya felt his breath catch in his throat.
He hadn't seen her smile in months.
"I–I... uh I should get ready, your brother is the prime minister."
"Deputy prime minister," He looked down at the floor. "He's already so full of himself."
"Apple doesn't fall far from the tree," She said, her pretty smile still present on her face.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
It took her a moment to respond, and Kyoya noticed the fabric on her white sleeves moving slightly... was she trembling?
"Yuuichi might be an asshole, but–" She took a step backwards when Kyoya began walking towards her. "What are you–" He caught her arms and she dropped the things she was holding.
"Are you shaking?" He asked and she tried yanking her hands away, but they only started trembling more, and Kyoya's stomach sunk. "Hanae what's wrong?"
She refused to meet his gaze, "It's none of your business."
"I'm your husband–"
"In name only." She yanked her hands away from his grip and turned her back to him.
"Hanae," He begged and she felt her throat begin to go dry.
"Please leave... I–I'll get ready, we can pretend, but please leave."
She didn't know what she was doing, but all she knew was that things weren't supposed to be like this, she couldn't stand being near him, it broke her heart whenever he took a step too close.
"I'll be waiting for you downstairs," He closed the door behind him.
Things weren't always so awful between them, there was a time when she cared about him, there was a fleeting moment when he was the first person she thought of when she woke up.
There was a time when he loved her.
She ran a frustrated hand through her hair.
They'd done too much, said too many cruel things, there was no way they'd ever be able to go back to a time where they didn't despise each other.
And for some reason the thought made her heart clench.
Takara's voice was barely above a whisper as Hanae closed the door behind her.
"Mary and I have been so worried about you."
"You shouldn't be, I'm fine... I guess I should consider myself lucky, things could be worse."
Hanae swallowed the lump that had grown in her throat as she turned her candle on, it was almost running out.
Takara nodded. "What... What happened when he found out, Hanae?"
Hanae looked down at the floor, pulling her hands away from her friend's.
"I–I don't wanna talk about it,"
"Did he–"
"No," Hanae cut her off before she even had the chance to finish. "Kyoya's a lot of things, but he's never laid a hand on me."
Takara nodded and she dropped her bag on the gray couch, she looked around the room and fidgeted with her hands for a couple of seconds.
"Wow, this is kinda small," Takara said as she walked around the room, and Hanae could tell she was trying to change the topic.
"Small? This room is almost twice as big as my room back home."
"This is your home now, Hanae... but I figured your master bedroom would be bigger."
Hanae was about to speak but they were cut off with a stiff knock, "I brought iced tea,"
Hanae recognized that grating voice anywhere, it was Ren Asai.
The blonde woman didn't even wait for permission before she strode in and it made heat flush in Hanae's stomach.
"I told you to stop doing coming in without my permission," Hanae mumbled, as she stood up to face the blonde girl.
"I'm sorry, I thought you told me to come in." The blonde girl smiled and set the tray of drinks down.
"I didn't."
"Won't happen again," Ren said quickly and Hanae had to resist the urge to curse her out. "Also, Kyoya asked me to tell you what you wanted served for dinner, tonight. Since we have guests,"
"Tell him, I'm fine with anything," Hanae mumbled handing Takara a glass.
"Of course you would say that," Ren muttered under her breath, and Hanae's lips curled up in disgust as she locked eyes with the insolent girl.
"Get out."
"My pleasure," Ren shouldered past Hanae and she huffed when the bedroom door slammed shut.
When Hanae turned to look back at her friend she looked shaken to her core
"How are you letting a servant talk to you like that?"
Hanae let out a dry laugh as she mimicked her husband's word, "She's not just a maid,"
"Who said that? Kyoya?"
Hanae nodded and she went to sit down on her bed again and her chest sunk as she whispered her truth.
"I–I think he likes her."
"The maid?" Takara gasped walking over to her.
"She's a year older than me, and you saw her, she–she's pretty." Hanae smoothed the wrinkles on her skirt. "They have dinner together."
"Kyoya Ootori?" Takara gasped, "That girl sits down and eats dinner with you two?"
"No, just him."
"You let them eat together alone?!"
Hanae only nodded in response and Takara gasped.
"What if they're sleeping together?"
Hanae's face fell. "I don't know, I haven't seen them together–"
"Hanae! You think he's going to do it where you can see? Believe me, I know first-hand–"
Takara cut herself off and Hanae's eyes widened, they both acknowledged what Takara had said, but when Hanae tried to look at her friend's regretful eyes, she knew that Takara didn't want to talk about it.
Of course, this only gave Hanae more reason to worry.
Maybe her friend was just projecting her insecurities onto her... or maybe her friend had simply walked this path before and she knew what the signs were.
They sat in painful silence for what felt like an eternity until Yuuichi's muffled voice thundered up the stairs.
"Takara, we're leaving!"
Hanae rolled her eyes, it was no surprise that he and Kyoya wouldn't stand speaking to each other for longer than fifteen minutes.
"Crap," Takara mumbled to herself before she grabbed her bag and dug out an envelope.
"What's that?" Hanae asked, looking down at her desperate friend.
Takara looked over her shoulder before placing a white envelope in Hanae's hand.
"It's from Hideo,"
The second Takara and Yuuichi left their home, Hanae darted up to her room to read the letter that she'd hidden under her covers.
Unfortunately for her, she was in such haste that Kyoya noticed her shaky hands and quick steps as she ran up the stairs.
When Hanae reached her room she locked the door behind her and she took a deep breath before she brought the letter up to her face. At the bottom of the letter, she saw the familiar little drawing he'd always sketch on the corner of the envelope.
She felt her nose begin to itch and she felt tears starting to sting her eyes. Her fingers delicately grazed the sketch of a bird flying into the sky, and she swallowed back her misery as her shaky hands opened the letter.
By the end of the letter she was hyperventilating, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't think.
She knew that she and Hideo couldn't be together again, she knew she'd come to terms with it... or at least she thought she had.
But to have it so bluntly written out, with his familiar signature on the bottom?
It was too much for her to handle.
In her desperation, she had dropped herself on her couch and she cried, she cried over what she couldn't change.
She broke down over the fact that it was because of her that Hideo's life was ruined, and in the end for what?
They certainly weren't together, they would never be together.
In her desperation, she didn't notice Kyoya come inside her room. His voice sounded distant in her head even though he was practically yelling, demanding that she hand over the letter.
The only thing that made her snap back into reality was the feeling of him trying to snatch the letter out of her hands.
It was signed with Hideo's name.
Hanae gasped as he pulled the piece of paper so roughly that it ripped in half, and she thanked God that she had kept the bottom half as she crumpled it in her hands.
"How did you get this, Hanae?" He yelled, but she only shook her head.
She was struggling to breathe let alone speak, she hated being so weak, so useless in front of him, but what could she do?
The love of her life had just written out his goodbye to her.
And as Kyoya looked down at her, he couldn't help but think the worst of the broken woman sobbing in front of him... but as he read the letter he wasn't sure what to think.
He never could think clearly when it came to her, all he knew was that the letter hurt him nearly as much as it hurt her.
It made his stomach churn, to see her so shattered over a man telling her their relationship had no salvation.
How much did she love him?
Enough to leave him on their wedding day, enough to leave her entire family behind and run away with him.
And his wife's heartbreak over this man, made Kyoya realize that throughout their entire relationship, Hanae had never cared about him the way she cared about this man.
The thought made his chest feel tight and his throat go sore.
He wanted to comfort her, to hold her.
She was his wife.
But instead, he chose to walk away, because he could no longer see Hanae as simply Hanae, instead he could only see the woman who'd tried to leave him on their wedding day.
If only either of them had known that Hideo Nanako had not written that letter.
author's note: I hurt my own feelings writing that letter shit, sorry I'm super attached to my poor, poor OC