He was still holding around me when a loud bip sound hit the room.
Words can't describe the feeling I have inside me. I don't even begrudge my worst enemy it. It's terrible. I started crying more.
"I can't look at it" I said and stared at Harry.
"I will do it" he said and took it up with the box.
He read for about 5 seconds, which felt like forever.
"Caroline" he said.
"Yes" I yelled.
"You're pregnant" he smiled a big smirk.
My face froze and I immediately stopped crying. It felt like a thousand knifes hit me in the stomack.
"I am totally kidding" he said and smiled.
"Are you fucking kidding me" I started punching him while happy tears ran down my face.
"I hate you and I don't even know you" I started laughing because I was so happy.
"I made you smile" he said and threw the test in the garbage. "If this was negative that means you had a lot to drink last night".
"Shut the fuck up. I fucking hate you" I said again.
I took up my phone and called Liam to tell him the good news. He was happy for me, even though he said he really wanted a baby in his life. I texted Zayn and told him the same, just so he wouldn't worry.
"I'm really sorry but I have to get home now" Harry said.
"It's okay. Thanks for the supporte". I followed him to the door and gave him an awkward hug.
"I'll see you around" he said and I shut the door after him but opened it again.
"Don't tell anyone Styles".
"Of course not" he yelled while he ran down the stairs.
I walked over to the frige to find something to eat. If it's one thing I love about Niall it is that he always has food, because he is a freaking foodmonster. The only thing he does when he's not with me or is working out, is sitting at the table, staring out the fucking window while eating something.
I found some cereal and sat down at the table, on my side of the table. I thought about all the times we had sex over the table and started laughing.
After finishing the food I cleand up after me before I walked over the the bedroom to sleep. This is when I realized how bad things really is.
I fell down on my knees crying. I'm sure everybody in the building could hear me. I took my phone up to call Liam. I was screaming in the phone.
"Caroline what's wrong" Liam asked.
"I can't be here. I just can't Liam".
"Come over here. I'm still at campus" he said and I hung up the phone.
I found some clothes while sobbing.
I locked the door after me. It was dark outside and only a few cars drove on the road.
I knocked a few times on Liams door before he locked it up.
I jumped in his arms, crying. He shut the door after me. He dug his head in my shoulder and cried with me.
"I know is hard, but believe me it will get better" he said while he ran his hand up and down on my back.
"I can't live without him Liam. I love him" I sobbed.
"He will come back. I know he will" he leaned out from the hug and took my hand, and we sat down on his bed.
"I don't get why he's leaving me now" I yelled.
"I'm not gonna answer that" Liam said and smiled.
Of course he ment the Zayn part. It was true though. I would have left too. Lucky me who don't have to worry about stuff like that since I don't have a freaking best friend, except Liam.
"How is things with Kali" I asked. I haven't seen Kali in days, which is unusual. I miss her. She is the closes girl friend I have, even though I know deeply inside she hates me.
"I haven't spoken to her in days" Liam said and dried away a tear on my chin.
We ended up falling a sleep with our cloths on. I woke up the next morning when my phone started vibrating. It was my mother. I didn't answer her, and closed my eyes again but couldn't sleep.
"Wake up" I said and pushed Liam on his shoulder a million times.
"I don't wanna" he said and turned around.
"Fine. I have to work" I said and stood up.
I looked myself in the mirror. The reflection was terrible. I looked like shit. My eyes was so red that it looked like I've been somking weed for days, my hair was a mess, and my make up was everywhere. I removed the make up before I walked out of the dorms.
Campus was so quiet. I'm sure it was only Liam and some asians kids that still lived there. I walked past Zayns house. It was all dark. He have probably travelled to England already.
I stopped by a coffee shop not far away from the bookstore to pick up some coffee for me and Mr. Willster.
"Caroline" a voice said.
I turend around. "Styles" I said, embarrassed. I've already forgot his first name. Which is terrible. This person was with me while I took a fucking pregnancy test, you just don't forget his name. But I'm me, so anything is possible and fucked up.
..I need to stop feeling sorry for myself.
"How are you" he gave me an awkward hug.
I pointed at my face and he laughed.
"So good" he said.
I smiled while I took a sip from my coffee.
"I need to get to work now" I said. Not sure if I should make it more awkward and say thank you for yesterday or not.
I skipped it.
"What are you doing tonight" he asked.
"Crying" I answered. "Why?"
"Crying makes us exhausted so I'm sure you'll need food. Then it will be chicken a la Harry"
I was gonna say no, but it's free good, and none girl in my position says no to free food. And now I at least know his first name.
"Can I bring a friend?" I asked while closing one eye.
"Who" Harry asked.
"Liam Payne. He is english" I said.
"oh British fellas is always welcome" he said.
I nodded my head a bit before I left the coffee place. I texted Liam that I found us free food for the night.
"Good morning Caroline" Mr. Willster said when I walked in the door.
"I brought coffee" I said and gave him one cup.
"Thank you very much" he said. "So what is your plans for this summer"
I sat down beside him.
"I don't know. But I know I will be able to work, at least now" I said and forced a smile out.
"Thats great, then I won't get lonely at the store" he smiled and drank from his coffee. "And I have your first payment. You have deserved this"
He handle me an envelope with money.
I've forgot I get paid to be here.
"Thank you so much" I said and gave him a hug.
I really need the money. I have none.
"I need to get a few things done, is it okay that you stay here by yourself for about an hour" he asked.
"Of course" I said and slammed my feet on the table.
He smiled and disppeared out the door.
I went to the backroom to fix myself up a bit. I looked like shit. The bell rang so I walked back into the store while fixing my hair.
"Hello how are you" I said with my head down to pull my hair up in a bun.
"Caroline" a voice said.
I looked up. Louis.
"You work here" he pointed out in the air.
"Yes I do" I turned my head up again.
"I had no idea. How are you"
I really didn't wan't to talk to him because of what happend last time but we both were drunk so.
"To be honest. Terrible" I raised my shoulders.
"Oh. Why is that"
Is it within to tell your x about your problems with your now x/boyfriend? Hell no.
"Uhm..My mothers wedding went terrible" It wasn't a lie though.
"I heared about that" he said and put his hands in his pockets.
"Why weren't you there"
"Exam" he said.
"Oh" this was awkward.
"I will go back to England for a few weeks now. Can't wait to see my whole family again" he smiled a big smile.
"Everybody is leaving"
This reminded me of that Liam leaving too.
"Where's Niall" he asked.
"Ireland" I tried to act calm. I did a good job.
"Oh. Well it was good to see you again Carro" he gave me a hug before he left the store.
The rest of the day wen't okay. Working, and being around Mr. Willster really made my mind think about other things than Niall. It was good. But leaving the store and go back to his apartment made it all horrible again.
I took a quick shower before I called Liam to come pick me up.
"Who are we going to" he asked.
"A guy named Harry" I said and Liam looked weird at me.
"Who is Harry"
"That's a long story" I said and leaned into the window. "He've texted me where he lives"
"You have no other options than telling me it" Liam said.
I told him about when I met him for the firs time, and how I met him at the store, and that he was with me while I took my pregnancy test, and how I've told a complete stranger about all my prolems and all that.
Liam just laughed. "Well, well at least it wasn't facebook".
"I think it's here" Liam said and parked his care outside a small, cute house. We walked up to the door and rang the bell.
Harry opened the door.
"You made it" he said and hugged me.
"Hey Styles" I said awkward. "This is Liam" I pointed at him.
"It's nice to meet you" Liam stretched his arm out, but Harry hugged him. Liam looked at me with big eyes, while I laughed.
"Come in" Harry said. A delicious smell hit our face when we walked in the door.
"It smells good, I'm starving" Liam said
"The food is actually finished" Harry said and led us into the kitchen.
"Amazing" I said and sat down at the table.
"I present to you both. Chicken a la Harry, the best you'll ever taste" Harry said with a french voice.
"Do you live here all by yourself" I asked.
"No I live here with my sister, Gemma".
Harry told us about his story and how he ended up in America with his sister. The dinner wen't better than I thought. We all ended up knowing each other a lot better. Liam and Harry really had a lot to talk about since they both were from England. I've never been there so I didn't understand a shit.
"Thanks for the amazing dinner Styles. You were right, best chicken I've ever tasted" I said and hugged him.
"Yeah thanks a lot. I needed that since I'm leaving tomorrow" Liam said.
I can't believe Liam is leaving me too. The only friend I have left here now, is Harry, but I can't complain to him about everything. I don't know him that well.
I smiled to Liam when he said the words. We walked back to the car. Liam talked a lot about how happy he was that I brought him with me and what a nice lad Harry was.
"When are you leaving" I had to ask him.
"Tomorrow. In the morning" Liam said and looked at me fast.
"Can't believe you're leaving me" I said.
He stopped infront of Nialls apartment.
"I'm not leaving you forever Westbo" he smiled.
"If you do I'll hunt you down" I said and stared out the window.
His hands was around my neck fast. Liam is my only best friend, and I can't lose him. I love him, not in that way, but in a friendly way.
"Love you" he said when I opened the door.
"Liam?"
"Yes"
"Can you sleep with me tonight" I asked.
Liam thought about it for seconds before he answered. "Sure. But I have to get back to campus to pack the few things I have left" he said.
Which reminded me that I haven't packed up my dorm room yet.
"I'll come with you. I haven't taken any of my stuff from my dorm" I jumped in the car again.
I locked up the dor to the room and turned the light on. Kali's side of the room was completely empty, while my side looked like shit.
I found a bag in the closeth and started at the bedside drawer. The frist tray was filled with empty condoms, and used condoms. A charger, and some chocolate. Also a book. I threw everything in it away. In the second tray laid a polariod camera and some photos. I'd totally forgot about it. It was also some condoms and a bunch of empty bandage things. I looked through the polariod photos. It was one of me and Kali when we first started the year. I think my mother took it. It was a few from a party, with people I have no idea who is. It was a few of me and Niall. One where we're laying in bed, naked I can tell. We both looked very sweaty but we looked so happy. Niall wore a snapback and his hair looked brown because of the sweat. It was another one of the same thing only he kissed me on the cheek.
The other photos of us was taken on a roadtrip. I remember we borrowed my mothers car, and asked complete strangers to take silly pictures off us. It was summer and the lightning was orange. I was sitting on Nialls back on one of them, and on the other he was leaning over my neck while I held his hands. We looked so cute.
I was now crying.
Liam knocked on the door and came in.
"What are you doing" he sat down beside me.
"I was just cleaning out off my bedside drawer and I found these pictures" I gave them to him while I wiped away the tears on my chin.
"Wow you guys looked so happy here" he stared closely on the pictures. "and what is that Kali looks super fit"
I laughed at him. "I miss him so much"
Have you ever realized that when somebody is not in your life anymore and you starts to miss them, everything about them becomes perfect and it's only the good memories that floats through your brain? All the bad ones is gone. It kinda suckes, because it makes it all so much freaking harder than it should be.
"I know you do" Liam hugged me. "We should go back now. Its getting late"
I packed the rest of my stuff before we drove back to Nialls apartment. It felt so weird staying there with Liam, but it was better than sleeping alone.
"This is so awkward" Liam said and laid down on the bed.
"Just try to think of it as my apartment" I laid down beside him.
"I hope you've changed sheets"
"Of course I have" no I haven't. It hasn't even been a thought.
The next morning Liams alarm woke us up. I stood up from the bed quick, and took a quick shower before I made us breakfast.
"Liam I've made eggs"
Liam sat down on the chair Niall always used to sit on. I thought I would drop the pan on the floor when I saw him. Everything felt so weird.
"I can't wait to see my family again." Liam told me a lot about his family and I tried the best I could to not cry over that he was gonna leave me too.
"Thanks for breakfast. I really have to get to the airport now" he walked into the bedroom to find his stuff while I cleaned after us.
"Uhm Caroline" Liam said and came out of the room.
"Yes"
"Do you want to have my car this summer? I can't take it with me on the plane, and I know you don't have a car so"
The thought of having a car made me so happy on the inside that I thought I would explode, but I didn't want to seem desperate
"Oh well okay if you insist" I finished the cleaning.
"You have to drive me to the airport you know" Liam said.
We drove straight to the airport and I have to admit it was terrible to say good bye to Liam even though it's only for a couple of weeks. I went to the bookstore to work after I drove him.
"Have you bought a car" Mr. Willster asked when I walked in the door.
"I'm gonna borrow it from Liam while he's in England" I said.
The work day went fine. I texted Harry to meet me at a cafe to grab lunch after work.
"How are you feeling" Harry asked while the waitress put the pizza on the table.
"Okay" I said and stared down on the table.
"Love the way you lie" Harry said
"What did you just say" I looked up at him confused. Love the way you lie is mine and Nialls sentence. It represents us. Maybe it's a english thing or something.
"What" Harry looked more confused than I did.
"Nothing" I took a bite from the pizza.
"Love the way you lie" he said again.
"Don't say that"
"Why" Harry took a big bite from his pizza.
"Just don't"
"Tell me why"
I was not gonna argue with him. It just hurt hearing him say it.
"Please just don't say it okay" I looked at him with an understandable look.
"Can't you just tell me why"
He really started getting on my nerves now.
"Because Niall always fucking say it okay? It hurts when you say it"
Harrys face turned into some sad childish face who finally understood that taking candy is not okay.
"Oh I'm sorry" Harry said. "You really miss him don't you"
"Yes I fucking do" I stared at him.
Harry pulled his hand over his curly hair. "Will he come back after the summer" he asked.
"I don't know. I hope not. It will make everything a lot easier if he dosen't" I took a sip from my water.
"You've never told me anything about him" Harry said.
"I've known you for only a few days" I looked weird at him.
"Yet he's the only thing you talk about". Harry won.
"Uhm....He is blond, short but not shorter than me, he's skinny but has some muscles since he box everyday, also he's irish, and he's a fucking dick"
"All girls say that about their X". Harry was right, but Niall is for real a fucking dick. He's the definition of the word. If you look it up in a dictionary it will probably stand "Niall" beneath it.
"You haven't met him" I said.
"Hopefully someday I will".
We finished our food and decided to go back to my, or Nialls apartment. Harry was talking about some dude he had met at a store the whole trip back to the apartment. I put the key in the keyhole and locked up the door.
"Harry will you please shut the fuck up about this dude" I threw the keys on the table. "I don't even know who the hell you are talking about"
"Oh you're such a great listener Caroline" Harry said ironic.
"Uhm hello" Harry said and I turned around.
.Fuck.