"7:15 you guys!" Freddie said as he woke up his sisters. He walked down the hall and knocked on his little brother's door.
"7:15," he said to Derek, who was playing with Lacy.
"First shower!" Isla called as she raced out of bed.
"You had it yesterday!" Her sister, Lil said as she chased her to the bathroom. Isla got in first and shut the door.
"Fuck!" Lil yelled as she went downstairs. Freddie got the milk out of the fridge and looked at the calendar. Electric was due today. He put the milk on the table grabbed the box they use to pass around money for the bills.
"Electric," he said, handing it to Lil.
"Coming through!" Isla came in with Carly on her back.
"Electric," Lil said, placing $15 in the box and handing it to Isla.
"Electric," Isla put in $13 and passed it to Carly who passed it to Derek.
"No! You've got a happy meal on the front of that shirt!" Freddie said as he walked over to Carly, who looked down at the barbecue sauce stains on the front of her shirt.
"Arms up," Freddie said as he lifted Carly's shirt off and put it back on inside out.
"Field trip. Need mom's signature," Isla said as she handed Derek her permission slip. Derek copied his mom's signature onto the piece of paper.
"Wow, Derek that's getting really good," Lil said, admiring her little brother's work.
"Who's got the phone?" Freddie asked, referring to their stolen phone that they pass around.
"I got it," Lil replied.
"Any minutes left?"
"Uh, fourteen," Lil said, throwing it to Freddie.
"How much are we short?" Freddie asked, walking over to the table and looking in the box.
"Eighteen dollars and thirty cents," Derek replied.
"I'm tutoring after school, should be able to kick in like, 10 more," Lil said.
"Did Carly put any money in?" Isla asked. Carly shook her head.
"You're almost nine, you're gonna have to start pulling your weight!" Derek told her. She shrugged.
"That's right, and get a real job, not just dipping into the collection plate at St Tim's" Lil said to Carly.
"I'm filling in for Candi at work, I can cover the rest," Freddie said, with Lacy on his lap.
"Extra kraut on mine,"
"Cheese on mine,"
"Somebody's gotta take Lacy," Freddie said.
"Uh, I got a calculus test," Lil said, getting up from the table. Freddie looked at Isla.
"I'm working after school," Isla said. Freddie looked at Carly. It was obvious that he couldn't get Carly to take Lacy. He looked at Derek.
"Show and tell?" Derek suggested.
"Show them the birthmark on her back. It looks like Latvia," Freddie said, handing Lacy to Derek. Everybody rushed out of the house. Mornings were rough in the Gallagher house, but they got through it.
...
Like every day, The kids all went to school, and Freddie went to his shitty minimum-wage job.
"No Candi again?" Freddie's coworker asked as he came into work.
"Bobby's got a bail hearing," Freddie replied.
"That kid's gonna be the death of her, what is it this time?"
"Tried tagging a cop car, with the cop still in it," Freddie replied as his coworker handed him a hot dog.
"Who's got the jumbo dog?" Freddie asked, walking to the counter.
"That's me, cutie," said a pretty girl who was waiting at the counter. Freddie rolled his eyes and handed her her food. This girl was always coming onto him and perving on him. If the gender roles were switched, she would be arrested by now. (See what I did there?;))
...
Lil walked up to the house where Kyle Jackson lived. She was going to be tutoring him, rumor is that he always liked a little something more than tutoring. Lil walked up the porch and knocked on the door. The door opened a crack and a man peered out.
"Uhh, hi. I'm here to help Kyle study for his midterm," Lil said, slightly creeped out.
"Ok, but you'll have to take your shoes off," the man, who Lil assumed was Kyles father said.
"What?"
"I'll get you a plastic bag," he said shut the door and went inside. Lil hesitated, but proceeded to take her shoes off.
"He's got this thing about people bringing dirt into the house," Kyle said to Lil as they had started the tutoring session. "Melissamaphobia,"
"Oh, right," Lil said as she watched the man, who was watching TV while cooking dinner. He was weird, but she kinda liked him.
"Ok, so um, if you remember it like this, the formula's completely visible," she said as Kyle leaned in. "Midget naked witch is bending over and she's cry, because she lost one earring, and can't find it,"
"How do you know all this?" Kyle asked with a smile.
"It's just something I like to fool around with," Lil replied.
"Like a hobby?" Kyle asked.
"No, like a plan," Lil replied.
"Physics?"
"Yeah! Have you done Newton's first? I've got a great one for that," Lil said. "Everybody continues a state of rest or uniform motion unleaded acted upon by an external for-" Lil was cut off by the feeling of her jeans being unzipped. She looked over and saw that Kyle had left his seat and was under the table. Her jeans were pulled down, and then, you know...
"Kyle, I uh, I'm still gonna have to charge you for this," Lil said, enjoying Kyle going down on her, but also worried about her money.
"Charge me?" Kyle said from under the table.
"Yeah, this isn't charity, I get paid for tutoring," Lil replied.
"I know, science just turns me on," Kyle said with a smile. Lil sat back and enjoyed it, while also feeling a little weird, since his father was right there in the kitchen.
...
When Lil got home, she took off her pants, noticing the huge wet stain around the crotch. She put on different pants.
"Lil, you in there?" Freddie called from the hall.
"Yeah,"
"Can I borrow your deodorant?" Freddie asked, walking into the room.
"Yeah sure, if you wanna smell like lavender and peach," Lil replied.
"I'm good with that," Freddie said as he grabbed the deodorant off the desk.
"Freddie!" Vin called, coming into the room. "We gotta go if we're gonna get a ride to the club,"
"Five minutes," Freddie pleaded.
"You sound like a girl," Lil smirked. Freddie flipped her off as he dried his hair.
"Dinner's downstairs, take care of the kids," Freddie told her as they left.
"Have fun!" Lil called. She walked over to the wardrobe and opened the drawers. She heard something fall out the back. She looked under the wardrobe and saw that it was Isla's porn magazine's. She chuckled as she took out the magazine. She sat on the bed and opened the magazine. Only to see, not pictures of hot men, but pictures of hot girls. She turned the pages and saw endless pictures of naked girls. She heard footsteps coming towards the room and quickly hid the magazine under the mattress on the top bunk and climbed up. She watched as her younger sister came in.
"Hey," Isla said when she saw Lil.
"Hey," Lil replied. A million thoughts raced through her head. Was her sister a lesbian?
...
Meanwhile, at the nightclub, Freddie and Vin were dancing having a good time, when Freddie heard someone scream.
"My purse!" He saw a guy running out the club with a purse, he immediately dashed after him. He saw the guy get in the car and drive off.
"Asshole!" He screamed at him. Vin appeared by his side.
"Jesus man, that was awesome!" He exclaimed.
"Hey," he heard a girl's voice behind him. He spun around to see a girl with long, dark brown hair a chocolate eyes.
"Shit, I'm sorry, I tried to catch him, he got away," Freddie said, after hesitating at the sight of the beautiful girl.
"That's ok, that was awesome. It was so heroic!" She said with a smile. "I'm Stella,"
"I'm Freddie, hey, you want me to buy you a drink?" He asked.
"Sure," she replied. They started walking inside. Vin leaned in to him.
"Jesus, man, you scored big time!" He whispered.
"Where do you think you're going?" The bouncer asked as they tried to walk back inside.
"Where's his stamp?"
"Can you believe this joker?"
"No stamp, no re-entry," the bouncer said, trying to be intimidating,"
"Fat prick," Vin said to him.
"Ok, that's it, you're all barred, for drugs," the bouncer said back.
"He probably let that guy get away cause he knows him!" Freddie accused.
"Shut up, dickhead." the bouncer said back.
"Let's just forget it," Freddie said, motioning for them to walk away. They started to walk when Stella raised her foot and kneed the bouncer in the balls, causing him to double over. Freddie and Vin started yelling and laughing. Stella ran out onto the street, which pissed off a lot of cars. They were screaming, laughing and cursing as they ran home.
...
Back at the house, Lil couldn't sleep. She was too worried about what she saw. She looked over at Isla, who was awake as well.
"Got some action today," Lil said, hoping to strike up a conversation. Isla laughed.
"What's the law on sex with pets?" She chuckled. "Who?"
"Kyle Jackson," Lil replied, sitting up.
"No way,"
"Yep, he got a C in physics, needed a B," Lil hopped down from her bed and walked over to Isla's.
"No, you wouldn't have waited this long to tell me," Isla said, lighting up a cigarette.
"Oh, yeah, five hours,"
"You're full of shit," Isla laughed.
"Fuck you," Lil laughed back. She looked over at Carly, who was sleeping on the bottom bunk. She needed to make sure her little sister was sleeping before she brung this up.
"You ever have anyone gone down on you?" She asked in a more serious voice.
"Once or twice," Isla replied, not looking up.
"I didn't hear you rushing to tell me," Lil said, taking the cigarette and taking a drag. "I mean, I thought we tell each other everything," she walked over to the top bunk where she put the magazines. She took the magazines out.
"Unless it was a girl," she threw the magazines at Isla, who caught them. Isla froze. She couldn't believe Lil had figured it out. They heard voices downstairs.
"I'm not kidding, Stella. You are dead if he ever lays eyes on you again and I mean dead," Freddie said, walking into the living room where Vin and Stella were sitting on the couch.
"I nearly pissed myself when you hit him!" Vin laughed
"You piss yourself over everything!" Freddie laughed. Derek, Lil and Carly came downstairs.
"How many of you guys live here?" Stella asked, noticing the number of people in the room.
"Not me. I'm one down, but the guy next door died in March, so technically we're next door neighbors!" Vin said.
"So your a nurse Vin?" Stella asked.
"Used to be,"
"Lying dickhead," Freddie laughed.
"He worked housekeeping at Cook County, bedpans and shitsheets," Lil said.
"Stella," Stella held her hand out to Lil. She shook it.
"Lil,"
"Derek," Freddie pointed to Derek.
"How you doing Derek?" Stella asked. He looked up.
"Nice bracelet," he said.
"Thanks, its real gold,"
"Where did you steal it from?" he asked. Freddie chuckled.
"That's Carly," he said, pointing to Carly.
"Stella," she reached her hand out and Carly shook it.
"And Isla," Freddie pointed to Isla, who was sitting on the steps with her head in her hands.
"Hey, Derek, why do they call her Lil?" Stella asked. Derek looked over at Lil, who smiled.
"Her real name is Phylil, but she hates it," he replied, shrugging.
"Yo Vin?! You got my keys?" Kel came in the front door. She saw Stella sitting on the couch next to Vin and got suspicious.
"What's going on here?" She asked.
"This is Stella. Her purse got stolen at the club, and Freddie ran to get it back, then when the bouncer wouldn't let us back in, she kneed him in the balls," Vin said, proudly.
"Which bouncer?"
"Jimmy Clifton," Freddie replied.
"Well dammmn girl! Put it there! Respect!" Kel said, holding her hand out to Stella.
"Guy just stands there, he doesn't really do anything," Stella laughed. Freddie got up from the couch. He grabbed the beer off of Carly, who was chugging it.
"Ok, come on! Up to bed!" Freddie said, motioning for everyone to get upstairs. Kel and Vin started walking outside. They looked at Stella's brand new Mercedes that was parked outside.
"That's her's?" Kel asked.
"Yeah, well, company car." Vin replied.
"What kind of company?" Kel said, walking over to the car.
"Internet startup," Vin replied.
"Earning what?"
"A couple mil a year, started off as a janitor in this small tech firm, within a year, she owned it! Made her first billion by 20, owns two jets, controlling interest in the Red Wings, 10,000 employees kissing her ass, yes boss, no boss. Why shouldn't she ride around in style?" Vin replied. He laughed.
"Oh, you just made that up!" Kel figured. "Why do you do that?"
"Your face!" Vin laughed.
"How is that funny? It's not even funny!" Kel said.
"How the fuck would I know how much she earns? I just met her an hour ago!" Vin laughed. They walked up to their house.
"So," Kel turned around. "You wanna get dirty tonight?" She asked flirtatiously. Vin smiled.
"Always,"
...
"Everybody asleep?" Stella asked when Freddie came down from putting the kids to bed.
"I think so," Freddie walked over to the sink, before being pulled in and kissed by Stella. He stopped.
"I can't," he said. Stella walked over and turned off the light.
"You know, 90% of the world's problems are caused by tiny words that come in pairs. I mean, we're healthy and we're happy, but when people ask, we say 'not bad'. You know, the first time that I saw you, about a month back at Crobar, I was desperate to come and talk to you. I'm a shy person, so I told myself; I can't. He won't. We wouldn't. And then tonight, I see you there again, with all the implications that I'm getting a second chance to make a good impression. Tell me to stop and I'll stop," Freddie leaned in and kissed her.
The kissing turned into making out, and making out turned into sex on the kitchen floor. That was, until there came a knock at the door.
"Freddie? You in there?" They heard the man at the door say.
"Shit. Shit shit shit shit. Freddie said as he scrambled up and got dressed. He ran upstairs and left Stella to answer the door. She opened the door and saw Terri, a cop, standing at the door.
"Is Freddie in?" Terri asked.
"Uh, yeah, he's upstairs," Stella replied. They paused for a minute. Terri was looking at Stella waiting for her to go get Freddie.
"I'll go get her," Stella said after an awkward silence. Stella raced upstairs to find Freddie coming out of the bathroom
"Uhh, cops, outside, looking for you..." Stella said, waiting for an explanation.
"Ugh, wait here," Freddie said as he went downstairs.
"Hey Terri, thanks for doing this again," he said, opening up the door to fit Franc in.
"No problem Freddie," Terri replied as she placed a passed out Franc on the floor. Franc was moaning about something, but Freddie ignored it. Stella came downstairs.
"Who the hell is that?" Stella asked, looking at Franc. Freddie shrugged.
"My mom," he said, stepping over Franc. He walked into the living room.
"You just leave her there all night?" Stella asked.
"She's never there when I get up," Freddie replied. He handed Stella her coat. She walked out the door and out to her car. She turned around and looked up at the second story window to see Lil, Isla, Derek and Carly looking out at her. She waved to them and left.
...
The next day, Freddie was taking Lacy to the dry cleaners.
"Where's Rita?" He said to the woman who was working at the dry cleaners.
"Anne's school called, she's sick, everything up to 204 is clean, i should be back in a couple of hours," the woman replied. Freddie was filling in for her, he worked a lot of jobs to keep the family going.
"You ready?" He said as he lifted Lacy into the basket of clothes and took them in to be washed.
...
"Kelly! Did you miss me dear?" Franc said as she walked into the bar that she knew too well.
"A beer and a bump, and, Billy, you having one? Have one!" She laughed.
"Go away Franc," Kel said as she got her drinks.
"A pen, Miss Beerkeep, it is disability day!" Franc said as she sipped her beer.
"The disability people haven't caught up with you yet?" Kel asked, "I thought they has one guy following you around with a camera!"
"They can follow me around all they want to, but to actually catch me doing something," Franc said proudly as she signed the cheque.
"What's with the crowd?" Franc asked, noticing the lack of people.
"Layoff at the cricer plant," Kel replied.
"You see, that's the problem with working, too much instability. Stress!" Franc said, taking a chug of beer and a shot. Kel handed her some money.
"What the fuck is this?" Franc asked, looking at it.
"What's left, after I settled out last month's bar tab," Kel replied. Franc whistled.
"Better start a new one then," Franc suggest, taking another sip of beer. "Oh, and a round for all my friends from the UAW!" Franc said to everyone in the bar, holding up her beer. She laughed. Everybody cheered.
"Wow, really?" Kel asked, surprised at Franc's offer since she has never once offered to buy anyone but herself a drink. Franc looked up at Kel.
"Fuck no!" Franc scoffed.
...
Later that day, at the house, Freddie was leaning against the broken washing machine, which was rocking back and forth. He grabbed his coffee off of it and took a sip. There was a knock at the door. He walked over and answered it. He was surprised to see Stella standing there.
"Hi," she said when he opened the door. "I was wondering what your schedule's like on Friday"
"Uh, I've got a... I've got a party," He replied.
"Need a chaperone?"
"You're not eligible," Freddie declined.
"Right, guy thing?" Stella asked, walking inside. She closed the door.
"You're not that desperate," Freddie said.
"Wanting to see you again's desperate?" Stella teased.
"No, feeling like you have to, that's desperate " Freddie replied. "Come on, you could get laid anywhere,"
"Oh, so I'm only here for a fuck?" Stella said, acting offended.
"Never crossed your mind?" Freddie said.
"Ah, just when you think you've got your dream guy, your Prince Charming, his alchoholic mother appears, wrecks everything... and he's blaming you?" Stella said. Freddie rolled his eyes.
"Your Prince Charming? We had drunken sex on my kitchen floor!"
"Quit pretending you don't even know me! You were the one who tried to get my purse back! We weren't that drunk!" Stella pleaded. At that moment, Lil came down the stairs.
"Hey, its Phylil!" Stella exclaimed when she saw her.
"Hey, its dead man walking!" Lil replied. "Jimmy Clifton called today, looking for you,"
"What, no school today?" Stella asked.
"Nah, got some teeth pulled," Lil replied.
"Wisdom teeth?"
"Sugar rot," Lil replied.
"Ah. You know, fun fact: don't just chew your food on one side, it can buckle your jaw, which will buckle your hips and affect your posture," Stella said, trying to sound smart.
"That's a fact?" Lil asked, sarcastically.
"Skeletal fact," Stella replied.
"Lil," Freddie motioned to his younger sister to leave the room so he could talk to Stella. Lil nodded and started walking out. Before she left, she turned around.
"Hey um, fun fact: you keep talking out of your ass with that much conviction, you'll end up needing a much bigger toothbrush, that's an anal fact," Lil remarked as she left the room. Freddie chuckled at his sarcastic sister before turning back to Stella.
"Listen, I'm not looking to date. Not right now," Freddie said as he leant against the rocking washing machine.
"Ok, is it alright if I leave my number here for when you might be looking?" Stella asked, taking out a piece of paper.
"Sure,"
...
That afternoon, Lil and Isla were walking to Kyle's house, Lil was hoping to get Kyle to go down on Isla.
"Just keep talking about science, ok? It turns him on!" Lil said when they neared his house.
"Lil, this is nice and all, but I'm a lesbian! I'm sorry, but there's no way around it, I can't change it, I just am!" Isla exclaimed.
"You're not even fifteen yet! You don't 100% know if you're gay, just try it, you mind find that you're straight!" Lil replied.
"Lil, you're sixteen! Did you know at fourteen that you were straight?" Isla asked.
"Yeah,"
"Exactly!"
"That's different!"
"How?"
"It just is! Look, try it, trust me, you'll like it!" Lil said as they reached Kyle's house. They walked up the porch steps and Lil knocked on the door. Isla took a deep breath. The door opened and Kyle's dad peered out.
"Oh! Phylil! Kyle is so happy with you, he got an A on his physics midterm!" He cried. "Kyle! Your little helper is here!" Lil looked over at Isla who was giving the man a weird look.
"Uh, this is my sister, Isla," Lil introduced.
"Um, I'm out of plastic bags, why don't you leave your shoes out here where they can breathe?" The man suggested.
Once they had got inside and started tutoring, Lil had gotten Kyle to start going down on Isla, and you could tell it was awkward.
"Do you guys want any lime chicken chimichangas?" Kyle's dad asked as he was cooking.
"Um, uh no thanks Sean," Lil replied.
"Praseodymium, uh... magnesium, Sulfur...-"
"Alright, I'm off to work," Isla was cut off by Kyle's mother coming down the stairs. She was a cop, and a big lady, too.
"Hey guys," She said, coming over to the table.
"Where's Kyle?"
"Uh, her room, I think," Lil replied, knowing how protective Kyle's mom is of him. "We got stuck on a word, and she's uh... getting a dictionary,"
She went into the kitchen where Sean was and grabbed an apple off the fruit bowl. As she grabbed it, she knocked another apple and it fell out of the bowl and rolled under the table.
"I'll see you in the morning Kyle!" His mom called out to him. As she bent down to pick up the apple, she saw Kyle under the table.
"Kyle? What are you doing under the table?" She asked as she lifted the tablecloth. When she figured out what Kyle had been doing, all hell broke loose. Lil and Isla got up an ran. They heard Kyle's mom scream and flip the table over. She chased after them as they tried to go out the front door, but it was locked. Lil ran into the bathroom and jumped out the window, Isla came round the side of the house and they ran as fast as they could.
A/N I hope you like the first chapter! I was going to do the whole episode, but it just would have been way too long. Like, comment, vote! Tell me what you think. Do you think I did it well? Do you like my choice of actors? Tell me!