I better not have a fucking mob of Directioners at my door because of this. If you are a Directioner and hate your precious 1D being insulted .........go ahead and read this shit because frankly I don't give a damn about what you think >: ). For you Directioners that don't care if I make fun of them.....kudos to you because I respect you and you deserve a medal or something because you guys are VERY rare. To you other readers I hope you enjoy reading this because I damn well enjoyed writing it. If you haven't noticed already I am in a ranty mood. So I apologize if you see any sort of ranting in this chapter. ENJOY!
I was currently walking down the school hallway being bullied by my hateful classmates. Someone even had the nerve to actually do my Math homework for me! They obviously meant that since I'm a nerd that I can't do my own homework! Yeah, that makes total sense and is not complete bullshit whatsoever. Anyways, I was walking down the hallway when I suddenly hit a wall, but it wasn't a wall it was.....omfg! It was freaking ONE DIRECTION! I looked up into all of their eyes and seemed to put me in a trance and I couldn't escape them.
"MATE" All of them screamed at once. I looked at them confused, being the complete and utterly clueless human who actually turns out to be a super rare and powerful creature.
"What do you mean mate?" I asked innocently, even though every single girl should know what a mate is since it is being overused in all of the books and stories.
They all sighed at once and looked at me at what seemed to be hatred and disgust. It was kind of like the way my dad looks at me when I try to interact with him.
" One Direction rejects you as a mate." They all said in unison. One Direction then proceeded to make out with each other and walk into the main office.
I sighed since I was rejected by One Direction and I felt like complete and utter shit. When I walked into my Health class, which is the only class that is ever mentioned in this story, I saw Bad Boy making out with all of One Direction. Feeling even more shitty, I ran.
Two Hours Later
After finding my mates kissing Bad Boy, I decided to change myself and make them pay. It took me thirty minutes to run around the whole school to get my body fit. It then took me a hour to fight all the homeless people in the whole city so I can fight anyone who challenges me. The next thirty minutes were spent into me changing into the universes strongest supernatural being. The last thirty minutes was spent creating a secret lair that is more advanced than the government. That shit makes total sense because a teenage girl can make a lair better than the fucking government, bullshit. You know gosh darn well that no teenage girl can create a fucking secret lair of any sort. Maybe a lair of leaves and tree trunk, but not a fu- Ahem. Sorry bout that. (A/N I did warn you about ranting.)
Bish, I beezaint wanna give revenge fo my mate!
That was my wolf and it somehow seemed to talk like a stereotypical ghetto African American person. She has been crying over 1D ever since she came and it is getting on my last nerves!
Will you be quiet?
Yah her that Laquteshena? White Bitch thank she can controllmeh!
Yeah, I herr that gurl.
Wait. How are there two voices in my head?
This is a Teen Fiction book gurl, nobody cares if the shiz don't make sense.
Yeahhh wit you white bishlookin ass.
Will you guys please get out of my head!?!
Oh, she thank just cuz we black that we gonna listen tahhur.
White bish, please.
What-
Yah, racist white bish
No, I didn't-
Hey, I'm tired of this white bish, let's go to tha club. I hur that Tyrone MarqualKool-Aid Fried Chicken Jones is gonna be thur.
The one wit all the monay?
Yeahh, but you can't mess wit him cuz you got uh mate, remember?
Gurl, fuck mah mate, I won't meh a real strong man that got monay, not some boy band.
Yah go gurl!
Bye white bish.
Why don't you get a tan cuz you lookin like that gay sparkly vampire.
I sighed of relief that both of the voices left my head. Well, at least I can finally get my revenge on my mates. I smirked when I heard all of my evil classmates compliment me on my good looks. Yeah, over those two hours I gained my self-confidence. I used my super hearing to listen to all the compliments one of my tormentors were giving me.
"Hey, does Jade seem different today?"
"Nah, she looks like that everyday you probably haven't noticed."
"No, it seems like she gotten uglier?"
"Yeah, maybe she has. I mean it looks like she used too much make up and looks like she's blushing permanently with all that red stuff on her cheeks."
"Oh, and when she smiles, you can see red lipstick smeared on the top row of her front teeth."
"Was that wart always there?"
"Do you see the unibrow that seems to be forming on her forehead?"
"Do you see the unibrow forming on her upper lip?"
"Nice one Brah."
I stopped listening as I saw the two boys fist bump and walk away. Wow, I felt myself blushing at all of their compliments. As I walked into Health class since it was the only class we have at this school, I heard people pointing at me a snickering. It must be because of my total awesomeness and badassery. Yeah, I've become a true rebel and I won't follow the rules at all. I totally lifted the seat up in the bathroom after I used it. Yeah, I am a total baddass. The most badass thing I have ever done was putting a book totally on the wrong shelf, but I felt too hardcore for that so I just moved the book over three spots.
"Jade!?!"I turned around to see 1D looking at me with astonishment.
"I bet you totally regret rejecting me now." I put a hand on my hands while smirking at them.
"Yes, can you please take us back?"
"NO BECAUSE I WILL NEVER TAKE YOUR ASSES BACK BECAUSE I HATE YOU AND I AM A TOTAL BADASS NOW!!"
"Please?"
"Fine. If you even THINK about another girl I will........probably still take you back!"
"We're sorry but we don't think of you as mate material since we are all Alphas and we want a strong Luna."
"But, I am the universe's strongest supernatural being." I pulled out my certificate that said 'The Universe's Strongest Supernatural Being!™"
"Can you please forgive us?"
"*Sigh* Okay, I will forgive you."
"YES!"
"Just don't sleep with someone else."
10 Minutes Later
I was walking into the art room for no apparent reason and gasped of surprise when I saw 1D taking a nap with Queen Bee. It looked kind of uncomfortable since all of them were spooning each other. I can't believe that 1D did this to me even though we never shared any romantic moments whatsoever.
"WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH HER!?!" I screamed as I kicked the bitch in her stomach, which made her groan in pain.
"We wanted to cuddle with someone."
"Why not me!"
"We saw her first so we knocked her out and took a nap with her."
"I will NEVER forgive you!"
"Please?"
"…"
"Don't ignore us!"
"Pretty please?"
"…"
"With cherry on top?"
"You know I love cherries, dammit. Fine, I forgive you." We then ran off into the setting sun.
THE END
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I'm just joking because I still have some cliches that I have to make fun of before I end this. Consider this and early April's Fools! Haha! Sooo, how many cliches did you see? Why don't you comment and vote? I'll be your special friend ; )!