Harry POV
I don't know how long I have been up or the time for that matter. I haven't gone to school for the past two days. Locke up in my room as my mum tries to get me to leave and I'm not having it.
It's all her fault. Well I can't put all the blame on her. It's mostly mine.
I tried calling Louis every hour but he doesn't answer. Everyone has left the house to leave me in my despair state.
I didn't know what to do when I woke up on the couch and everyone just staring at me.
-----Flashback-----
“I love you” I hear my voice tremble with a crack at the end. I grip the wall beside me as I do something I haven’t done since I was a child.
I cried.
It first came out as a tear then more came down. I feel like I have just been hit by a super nova and I am ripped into a billion shreds.
My breathing increases with my sobs and I can’t breathe. My vision goes blurry.
A sob racks through my body before I know it. I fall to the ground and black out.
I open my eyes and I stare up at my aunts white ceiling. I feel a pounding in my head before I feel reality come crashing down.
I see everyone staring at me. I sit up and I swallow the lump in my throat that is forming.
"Harry?" I hear Gemma say quietly.
I don't turn around towards her or acknowledge her.
"Harry?" She says again as she puts her arms around me. I shrug them off not wanting comfort.
"Don't" I say harshly even if it does come off horse.
It's her fault she is the one who told mum and that's why they are here.
"Harry please. I-"
I don't let her finish because I look up at her from the floor and I glare at her through my glassy eyes full of tears that I'm trying to keep in.
I see her flinch at my gaze and looks away.
"No" I say harshly "it's your fault she I here. Because you opened your big mouth about Louis and-"
"Harry stop it. Don't talk to your sister like that-" my mum started
I turned around and fixed my glare on her.
"And you. You ruined everything. You always do. Anything that I enjoy or makes me happy you take away. Why? Mum! You took away all my toys when I was younger and gave me books. Didn't you know I was getting tired of books? I love books I do but you just push and push and don't stop until you get why you want!"
"Don't you want me to want what I want? Haven't you wondered why I wanted to leave?" I say towards my mum
"Harry" my AU t says quietly "I don't think-"
"No. She needs to hear this" I say
I walk towards her in a stalking matter.
She didn't say anything but kept a stern look on her eyes.
"It doesn't matter anymore. Just come home and you could go back to work at the hospital. I talked to them and they said they would live to have you back. So what's done is done and I'm sor-"
"You still don't get it! Mum I don't want to go back. That wasn't even home it was... A prison. A prison where you kept me because of what I brought. What I worked for!"
"And saying that it doesn't matter. What happened here...? Why you did- it's uncalled for. I did everything you asked for 18 years. But when I tell you to stop you don't. You keep in going wanting to crush every bit of happiness I have."
"To be a robot and just work and make a living on that. That is not what I want to do mum. I want to experience stuff without you. Without your judging gaze and everything having to go your way."
"I am not coming home to that prison. You will be lucky if I even come home for Christmas." I finish and keep my stare on her as I see her stern look crumble at my words.
"And you ruined everything with Louis" my voice breaks when I say his name.
"He was the best thing that has happened. Even before graduating from Harvard"
I feel another tear fall as I turn around and leave the room with my words still hanging in their minds.
------Present-----
So back to the present I don't know what to-
The doorbell is heard throughout the house. I should go answer it but I don't want to move. The bell goes off again and I groan as I get up.
I feel my joints crack and pop from not moving at all from my bed. I didn't even get up to eat. I lost my appetite along with... Louis.
I stagger down the stairs in a daze. I don't look in the peep hole and just open the door.
I feel a sting on my cheek as I stager back at the impact. I look at the person at the door and see Niall and Zayn there glaring at me. I see Zayn is the one who punched me. I don't even bother gripping my jaw. I want to feel the pain.
I deserve it.
"You asswhole!" I her Niall yell at me.
I don't bother at replying as I feel one of them push me and I fall back.
I don't fight back. I lay there on the floor motionless as I stare up at the ceiling.
"Aren't you going to fight back styles?!" Zayn says
"What's the point?" I say "It doesn't matter... Nothing matters anymore"
I sit up and stagger up slowly as they stare at me not moving.
I open my arms towards them.
"Give me your worst. I deserve it anyway"
My sister barges in with bags of stuff in her hands. She went with her friends or something.
"Hey Haz I bought you something at-" that's when she notices Niall and Zayn and my red cheek.
"Uh did I miss something? Your cheek harry Jesus. I'll get you some ice. Don't move"
I don't look at her as I just stare back at them.
She leaves to the kitchen.
"So what? She your girlfriend? Wow you work fast styles" Niall says harshly.
"Ewe gross. She is my sister"
I see his cheeks tint a pink a bit as he clears his throat. Gem comes back with ice in a cloth and presses it in my cheek. She chuckles.
"Just like when you were in college remember?"
I huff "yes. How can I? Now I'm fine" I say pushing her away. "I have had worse. Remember? Now go I have stuff to discuss"
“But-“
“Just go do something Gem” I say
She sighs but leaves.
I look from her back to the two lads standing at the entrance of the door.
“Alright were alone now. Do your worst”
Zayn sighs “Just tell us one thing?”
“What?”
“Why didn’t you tell him?”
“Tell him what?”
“That you’re a fucking genius Harry!” Niall shouts
I sigh and lean against the wall.
“Because I didn’t want anyone to know but I was. I was going to tell him in a few days but then my mum came and… ruined everything”
Niall stares at me along with Zayn no longer glaring.
“I had a plan how I was going to tell him. I was going to cook us dinner and let it on hi slowly and send him on his way to think about it or if he had any questions to ask me. But fate didn’t want to go the way I planned.”
I glance up at them and I see their just standing their emotionless.
“But it’s over now” I breathe out “He won’t talk to me or anything. I love him and I can’t even say it to him”
“You love him?” Zayn asks
I smile a little and look at them.
“Yeah I do actually. A lot. More than in a lot of things. He is the best thing that has happened to be since Harvard”
“Harvard?!” they both say at the same time
I hum.
“Well if you’re not going to do anything else just go so I could go back to my room and be in my depression state”
“You look like shit” Niall says
“Thanks I feel like it to”
They don’t say bye but just leave and I close the door.
“You know you could always go to his house you know?” I hear Gem say
I look at her and see her standing dear the door to the kitchen.
“Yeah well I won’t even make it inside let alone 10 feet near the house”
“It doesn’t hurt to try Haz”
I purse my lips
“Yeah maybe” I mumble as I walk or maybe even drag myself up the stairs to my room. Before I get to the top though Gem stops me.
“Want anything to eat I could make you something? And also I’m sorry for telling mum and everything.”
I turn around and send her a small smile.
“No I’m not hungry and I know you are”
I don’t say I accept it because I don’t think I am ready to forgive her just yet. I walk into my room and plop down on the bed and close my eyes while feeling the ache in my jaw.
And also my heart even.
Louis POV
I chase the ball down the field as I try and concentrate on the ball as I kick it in the goal.
This is what I have been doing for a while. I just been kicking the ball and everything. Getting my mind off of harry and back in the game.
It hurt that he didn’t trust me and everything. That also he lied to me and I’m not over it. I just don’t want to focus on that right now.
He hasn’t been in school for two days and I am worried about him even if I don’t want to be. He also has been calling me nonstop since Friday.
But why would he need to go to school for I just found out he is a genius. A genius that is fucking rich and has everything he ever wanted.
Why would he want me?
I don’t regret having sex with harry because it was the best I have ever had in my life. He has been the best thing that has happened to me since I found out I got a scholarship to Manchester University. I actually was going to tell him on Friday after diner with his family but then that happened.
Just thinking about him makes my heart hurt. I love him and he broke my heart.
I didn’t want this to happen. He was just so interesting. He didn’t talk to anyone except Liam and Josh maybe Niall a bit but that’s it.
I wanted to be his friend and get to know him but I have gotten too deep and look where it has led me.
Playing footy outside my house since I got home from school and kicking the shit out of my ball. Also with a broken heart in the mix.
But I also miss him. Deeply.
I sigh. I hear my phone ring again and already knowing who it is.
I look at the caller ID and see.
Harry Styles
Before I could think about it I press answer and bring it up to my ear.
“Hello” I say
“Louis” Harry says
I take in a deep breath at the sound of his voice.
But also feeling the dread of it at the same time. I feel the tears prick my eyes as I press the end button.
Why do I do this to myself?
--------------------
sorry its late. it is longer than the last chapter.
so tell me what you think.
also I got a instagram for hear. I guess that's what you would call it. its my profile name is thestarsinyoureye I post pictures of 1D, SP, Sherlock, and other stuff.
so follow me (If you want)
I did Louis POV o.o
thanks for reading
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