I had fallen asleep when tight pains and sharp movements woke me up. They were restraining my hands above my head with a tight rope that hung from the ceiling, and my ankles were wound together as well. I lifelessly mumbled and started to ask them questions.
"Where are we?" I glanced around and saw two other people smirking at me, and another girl who was hung up. She was bloody and didn't look like she was even alive. I watched her chest and eventually saw that it was rising and falling, and soon she opened her eyes. They were bright-red and bloodshot, and looked worse than what someone probably looked like when high... It wasn't anything I had ever seen before. She winced as they opened while she seemed to sniff the air, which was stale and musty. I noticed there was blood around her mouth, and was very confused what these people's obsession was with licking or drinking blood.
I started to tear up as I realized that I might eventually look like her. They finished hooking me up and then left the room for a second. I could hear their voices whispering outside but couldn't make out any of what they were saying. I started to cry when they walked back in, but the side of me that was numb said that I don't really care that I'm here because nothing really matters to me when I'm depressed. Then I have to ask myself, if that's the truth, why am I crying in the first place? That's my light side... I just wish there were more of it left...
"So darlin' we got a proposition for you,"
This was a different man than the one who kidnapped me. He was burly, large, muscular, yet fat in his stomach, and was just as unkempt and dirty looking as the man who brought me here. The third guy was a lot skinnier and he seemed at least decently taken care of. I'm not sure why there were differences.
"Hey! Are ya listenin' to us?"
I looked up at him slowly and nodded to the best of my ability. My eyes were heavy and would hardly stay open, and I feared I would fall asleep and that would also make them angry at me.
"We'd like you to be a new lure for us... so our negotiation is that you become a lure, we'll treat you right, feed ya, all the shit you people need, and we'll spare you. Does that sound like a deal sweetie?"
I just kind of stared blankly at him without knowing what to say, and hardly even comprehending any of what he said. I tried to open my eyes wider to look at him and respond, but I was failing. He grabbed my cheeks and forced me to look at him.
"Well are you gonna answer or not?" he started having a tone with me.
"Well I have a pro...position... for you, too,"
"And that is?"
"I need to know what's going on... I - have no idea what the... hell you mean by 'lure'," my voice was shaking and I had to swallow a lot before I felt like the words would come out clearly. "and you referred to... me as 'you - people'. Ex-planations would help me..."
He turned around to his companions or whatever he called them, minions, assistants, whatever. They gave single nods and he swiveled around to me like he was just soaking up these conversations like they were the best small talk in the world.
"Well, if ya wanna know," he walked up to me and looked at my wrist, then bared his teeth and over those appeared tons of thin, slender, sharp teeth.
"Am I dreaming? What kinds of drugs did you slip me??"
"No no everything you're seeing is completely real,"
He smiled as he pulled out a knife and sliced my other arm, pretty deep, but not too deep that I would bleed out. I winced and cried and clenched my hands at the unexpected pain. The other girl snapped awake and looked at me ravenously and her eyes were fiery and intent on my fresh wound. She also had the same razor sharp teeth bared at me...
"Did you feel that? Because if you did you know you aren't dreamin',"
"I can hear her heartbeat and her blood pumping," the girl said. She looked around the room and when she saw the lights she held her eyes closed tightly, and she was whining with whatever pain she was feeling. I had no idea why she would be so hyper-sensitive to lights and think she was seeing and hearing things that weren't there. I assumed her time hear had treated her pretty badly and drove her insane.
"Is she alright?"
"Well, not now, but soon she'll be on her way to being a shining star like the rest of us folks here,"
"Well what's wrong with her then? What is she going through right... now?..."
"How much do you believe in monsters?"
I looked at him like he was the insane one... "Umm... not at all... I believe there's demons... and-and angels, and heaven... hell, but the rest... none - n- of that is real..."
He stared at the girl and then touched his thumb to the cut on my wrist, and walked over to her and she licked the blood off of his finger and almost started sucking on his thumb and seemed to want to take it off. Things started clicking in my mind, but I felt like maybe my sleep deprivation was getting the best of me.
"There's no way... Is... Is she?"
"Is she what?" he got close to my face and gently bit my cheek with his sharp teeth. He licked the blood off. "C'mon sweetie, what is she?"
I stayed silent. He just looked at me and seemed annoyed.
"Oh I don't know! You.. drag me in here completely depressed and already - out of it... and then I'm seeing.. weird shit. I can't explain half of it... I -"
He yelled in frustration and didn't let me finish, "We're vampires darlin'! Of course, you're gonna think it's drugs or a dream! but hey," he whispered ominously in my ear... "It's all real,"
I tried to take a second to comprehend everything I just heard but I couldn't quite do that. I was too tired, too emotional, but at the same time I was too emotionally drained. I thought a question would help me clarify things.
"So then what were you... asking me to do?"
"We need you to be a lure," he came close to me and ran the cool blade against my cheek, careful not to slice it this time. Then he ran the back of his fingers against my face. "You're a pretty girl, aren't ya? You see, here's how we work... We need to feed. Just like you humans get hungry, so do we, but ours is... ehhhh," he paused to laugh like he recalled a memory, "Worse. Sure, sometimes we go a bit crazy and snap the neck of the first person we see and devour their throat and drink them dry, but it isn't always too easy to do it all clean and not draw attention. So that's where you come in. A pretty face shows up in a bar, tons of men immediately pay attention, but you wanna go for the stupidest, creepiest sucker in there. Now don't worry, we won't let him do anythin' to you... but what you will do is take him out and make him think he's gonna get somethin' real special from you, and then we end him. A scumbag out of the world and a clean disappearance. Now how bad does that sound?"
"Terrible, hon..estly,"
"Well sure, to you, but you see..." he held the blade of the knife to my throat, "it's either life or death for you, and it's life or death for us. It's a win-win situation sweetheart,"
I didn't want to admit it, but he was right...
Hesitantly, I nodded in agreement. They weren't appreciative, which makes sense, but you would think that they would be more grateful knowing a strange girl was coming into their lives and doing part of their dirty work, helping them be criminals and murderers - monsters. I didn't want to die and if doing this obscene job kept me alive, then I decided I should, but part of me wanted all my pain to end... Out of all of the thoughts in my mind, between life and death, the good and bad that have appeared in my life, and what I wanted for myself... I couldn't decide... I did so badly want to die, but at the same time, I wondered what would happen when I died... what it would feel like, what thoughts would be going through my head then - what it would be like to finally see God... But I also wondered what else I would have to endure if I stayed on this darkened earth, this place stained and riddled with emotional and mental diseases, with physical imperfections that hurt people, where murder constantly happened, cancer existed. Did I want to believe in a God that let all that happen? Did I want to die to be with Him and worship Him forever, or did I want to live and suffer in the terrible world He let exist?
I let my thoughts stew for as long as they decided they wanted to, feeling like sleep was nearing, but shortly they took me to a room where I could get ready and clean up my wounds. I asked them why they were wanting me to clean them up, and they said it helped to not disturb their newly turned vampire, but importantly, it helps when luring to not look like I've been abused or hurting myself, because that usually messes with peoples' minds, no matter how insane they were.
"Our tactic is that we have you get all dressed up, and prettied, you do your makeup, make it look like you aren't being held captive by us, even though we'll treat you nice... Then of course some asshole is gonna be mega attracted to you, and guess what! It's his lucky night because you actually pay attention to him and make him feel special and tell him you want to do dirty things to him," the guy cleaning my wounds winked at me. Another came in with the clothes I would wear, a long sleeved, tight black dress that would come about mid-thigh and some shallow black heels to wear with.
"It's practically harmless, besides the guy who gets offed in the end, but that's okay right? They're just a scumbag anyways," he laughed to himself. I tried to listen to what he had to say, but I just stared off into the distance and felt numbness and emptiness fill me a little bit more. Soon my arm was wrapped up and they came in with what makeup they had. It was old and almost all used up, so I picked what I could find and decided to make my eyes smokey to hide my tears. My hands shook as I tried to apply it and make it look nice. I covered all the redness on my cheeks from crying. I used a tiny bit of lip gloss, and for the most part I looked okay. I was slow at getting ready because my stomach upset me because of where I was. I was on the verge of being a murder assailant, no matter how much I tried to deny it.
I told myself that it was all a terrible dream, or a delusion, or I was nearing schizophrenia... I tried to make sense of everything any way that made sense and wanted to cry again but I tried to remain calm and push forward. I brushed my hair which was about shoulder length and wouldn't give me too many troubles... I got dressed and was thankful I at least had a good bra and underwear on when they kidnapped me, but I would probably still feel disgusting for a long time until I got used to all the things I was seeing and feeling...
When I walked out, they were all kind of perverse and inappropriate towards me. I just rolled my eyes and asked what was next... The leader walked up to me and again put his hand against my face, and I tried to push him away from me but he barely flinched.
"You're being feisty, gorgeous, you better hold off on that until the dick you pick up talks to you,"
"You're the only dick I see right now," I snapped at him. The look of anger on his face didn't disturb me and I just kept an even glare at him.
"I might just slap the bitch out of you right now..." His voice and tone was cold and sharp, and his eyes glowed fiery red when he looked down on me.
"Hey boss, let's not start this... If she's actin' like this we can deal with her later,"
He grabbed my arm tightly and jerked me around when he spoke.
"You listen to me - next time you don't let me touch you or you don't listen, I won't hesitate to beat you til you don't know where the day starts and the night ends no more,"
I kept glaring at him.
"Am I understood?" I sharply inhaled and didn't bother to respond. "AM I understood???"
"Yes sir!" I snapped back sarcastically and stepped on his foot with my heel, pushed him away and tried to run from them. I didn't make it far because there was another vampire outside of the room who threw me to the floor. He pinned me down and held my face so I would look at him.
"Now you listen to us... We've killed plenty innocent people, we won't hesitate if you try stupid shit like this again, but you've been the most reasonable we've taken, and we need to feed. You help us and we'll have something good for you to eat when you get back, whatever you want,"
"I don't know..."
"Well course you don't. So think on it and do this for us. It'll make you real proud of yourself. You're a beautiful girl, you know that?" I looked at this guy, and he seemed so sweet, he didn't seem like a vampire, or at least not like the others... "What do you say sweetheart?"
"I..."
"You??"
"Are you one of them?"
He looked around and saw no one else around us. He got close and whispered to me, "I'm not one of them. They were close to changing me when they came back with you and the boss yelled at them and said not yet... Typically they don't have male lures, but they said that they wanted to have some fun with women and take advantage then kill them... I hate it here and have wanted to get out since I got here. I don't even know how long it's been, but we can get out of here, if we really try,"
"But, when?"
"Right now, we're alone. If you want to make a break for it..."
"You go first and get help and help me. They'll be after us. You've had more plans and seem more prepared. I'm too exhausted to even try yet,"
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah just go before they catch on to what we're doing... I'll go back and comply and everything will be okay,"
"Good luck to you, uh.. what's your name?"
"Hannah,"
"Really, best of luck,"
He left and I went back into the room, and could hear his running steps sprinting for safety, to tell the authorities we were kidnapped and I needed help. But once I was in the room, I felt my stomach turn sick when I heard his screams, violent fighting and pounding, and all of a sudden, a sickening thud followed by the same deafening silence I had heard when I waited silently in the forest while a monster pursued me.
"What do you say, are you ready now to listen to us? Because look what happened to poor old Dusty... Dead in seconds," the boss walked up to me and then put his hand against my face again.
"And you're not gonna bitch at me this time, are you? Because you saw, or at least heard what happened... And I know somewhere deep inside you you don't want that to happen," he bit my earlobe and a chill went down my spine. "C'mon," he smirked, "you know you like it," and he did it again but to the other ear.
"Can we just go do what we have to do?"
"Ahhh, she's a fast mover! Sure thing sweetheart, let's get goin' then,"
One of his people brought the black case that goes over my head, and put it on.
"So that you don't rat on us or try to remember where we stay, or escape. We don't want none of that,"
They walked me out of wherever it was we were, and I significantly kept my balance for being tired and in heels, also blindfolded and in pain from my cuts. I was a little cold but hoped it wouldn't be much longer before we were in a car on the way to the bar. Sounds became my best friend, hearing myself breathe, hearing the sounds of the car starting and trying to follow where they were going but the feeling of the car turning seemed like it was spinning and it almost made me sick so I just focused on breathing and waited it out. Luckily it wasn't long until we got there. They took off the bag over my head and I became nervous to go and do this... I didn't ever really flirt with guys or try to sleep around, and I had only ever been with one person that was pretty intimate, so it was hard telling how I would handle the situation. Plus it's hard to flirt with someone when you aren't actually interested in them.
"Once you get this guy, walk him down that path towards the woods. He'll probably think it's ridiculous or sketchy, but your winning smile and charm should sway him to believing everything is alright. You got that?"
I nodded and got out of the car and watched them head off to the woods.
When I walked in, I held my right bicep with my left hand and grabbed it really tight because I was so nervous. Sometimes I hated social interactions and I couldn't stand being here alone, especially under these horrible circumstances.
I sat at a table because I was afraid of them accusing me of trying to drink when I was underage. I hoped eventually someone would come talk to me. I caught one guy, who appeared a little out of it, looking in my direction and I kind of awkwardly waved at him. He seemed taken aback that I was acknowledging him, but soon enough, he stumbled his way over to me.
"Hooow are you on this fine brisk night, m'lady,"
Oh God...I thought to myself.
"Hmmm... I don't quite know..." I tried to look at him with intent eyes and asked, "how do you think I'm doing?"
He sat for a good few seconds, part of it trying to hold back his burps and hiccups, and then he shot me an awkward smile.
"I'm guessin' you couldeb doing a b-better,"
I winked and flashed a smile and flirtatiously laughed, and playfully swatted his hand like they do in movies. "How'd you know?!"
"Well, *hiccup* you look lonely come in here. I wasn' goin' ta impose or anythin', but then you waved at me and thought I *hiccup* give it a shot. How'm I doin' so far?"
I scooted closer to him and put my hand on his inner thigh, "I think you're doing pretty good," I looked around the joint and then looked back at him and whispered, "what do you say we get out of here?"
His eyes seemed to light up and he set his drink down, grabbed my hand and took off with me out the door.
"How do you feel about being a little bit risky?" I asked.
"How d'you mean?"
"Wellll, I've always loved the outdoors and would love to be a little naughty out there," I held his hand loosely but sometimes he seemed to try to hold on a bit tighter and pulled me closer. Now I could smell the alcohol on his breath and it bothered me and chilled me to the bone. Drinking was alright but I hated it when people got drunk... or at least all the time. It isn't smart and it's unhealthy and destroys your body. I've seen too many sad things come of alcoholism and despised that that was another thing that existed on God's green earth.
"Doesenit seem a little too risky? Maybe we can just go in a motel or sumpin,"
"Well," I stopped him and got a little too close for my comfort but it was all about him at the moment. "If you really want me, you wanna make me happy and take me where I want to be, and somewhere we can be noisy," I got close to his ear and rolled my eyes, then whispered, "especially me," His eyes got wide with approval. He smacked my butt which scared me a bit but I tried not to show that I was bothered and unnerved by how he was acting and what I was doing... and we kept walking. The moon was out and at least lit the pathway so that we could see where we were going. I'm sure the vampires didn't need that though because they are toned to be hyper-sensitive to sound and light.
We arrived at where the vampires told me to wait, and now at this point, I hoped and prayed that they were lying that they were vampires. I had no idea necessarily what I was getting into. It was a screwed up, warped waiting game that I didn't want to play, but sadly, I'm a coward and couldn't make a fucking decision for myself.
He pressed me up against a tree, kind of rough. He smelled disgusting now that I was this close to him.
"Whatta you wann me to do t'you baby? How can I turnyou on?" his hand slid up towards my chest and just as he was about to cop a feel, I shoved him off of me and told him he wasn't going to get a chance to do anything.
Out of the trees came down my "heroes", the ones who would save me from such a horrible man, someone who was going to take advantage of me for all the wrong reasons. My heart broke because the asshats known as vampires were doing the exact same thing to me.
They pinned the poor guy to the ground, and no matter how much he won't be missed, I couldn't help but think that no one deserves to die at the hands of monsters... It's unfair, it's cruel... It opened my eyes a little about how I feel about myself and my suicidal ideation... I wouldn't want to die at the hands of monsters like these, how fair is it of me to think it's perfectly fine to end my life in the hands of an overdose, alcohol abuse, self-harm? It's a disease, a nasty one, as nasty as the blood that poured out of the man on the ground, that flew threw the air in a way blood should never exit the body. I shivered seeing them ripping at his throat, and seeing the shocked expression on his face that was now frozen there forever because all life had left his body. I started crying because...
I did this...
I killed this man...
I watched it happen...
I would be forever scarred by the brutality of these events, and maybe, because of that, I deserved to die at the hands of a monster...My OWN monsters...