Shrek couldn't stop thinking about The Donald. The lunch bell rang and he went to find Donkey.
Donkey was at his locker, wondering if Shrek would ever love him.
"Donkey!" Shrek called. Donkey turned, he blushed when he saw the enthusiasm with which Shrek greeted him.
"What is it, Shrek?" Donkey asked.
"Well," Shrek leaned closer to Donkey, "I'm now lab partners with Donald Trump." He whispered.
Donkey relished the feeling of Shrek's hot breath on his ear, sending shivers down his spine. He longed for more of this. It took him a minute to register what Shrek had actually said.
Then it hit him, "Really?" Donkey exclaimed in shocked horror which Shrek mistook for excitement.
"I know right!" He replied in an excited whisper. He hadn't told Donkey of his crush on the rotting orange, but Donkey knew. It was obvious to everyone but Shrek and Trump.
For the rest of the day Shrek just continued smiling. He was just so happy about interacting with the oompa loompa that he forgot to eat lunch.
--
That night Shrek dreamed of what it would be like to kiss the deformity that is the Trump.