© an affiniteas 2013-2014 ink on Wattpad
08 · The Tears of the Nurse
Taking up on Eric's words, I visited Soulatte Café on Sunday to finish my leftover homework there.
Mom was working again, and if I stayed in my room, I would have gotten nothing done because of the distracting mechanisms known as television and the computer. Even though I wanted to catch up with Grandma Lilith, she had a flight back home that Saturday night. She promised to make it to my graduation though.
I did invite Mikaela to meet up, but she reminded me that it was family day for her. The O'Connor's would declare every Sunday a family bonding day. Although Mikaela was embarrassed by it, I thought it was sweet that her family dedicated at least one day of the week to connect.
When I got to the café around five in the afternoon, it was packed with people that ranged from students and middle aged couples. The good thing about Eric's family café was no matter how young or old the customers were, the noise level stayed calm and relaxing. Searching for Eric, he wasn't working at the front.
Instead, it was Joshua.
Joshua was in the middle of taking a customer's order. However, his emerald green eyes glanced at me briefly before he returned his attention back to the customer. Grabbing the open seat by the window, I turned back around and nearly experienced a heart attack when I found Eric behind me.
Eric's eyes widened similarly, but he laughed out an apology, "Sorry about that. You okay over here?"
I nodded. "Of course, it's my favorite spot. You guys are pretty busy today."
He sighed. "A little too hectic. My parents are showing my grandma around, so we're short on staff. Oh yeah, halmeoni has those candies she always gives you guys."
Another reason why I loved Eric's grandma was all the little treats she would bring back for Mikaela and me.
A little too excited, I beamed, "No way! I love them. I'm excited to see her again."
My friend chuckled before adding that he better head back to help Joshua and the other guys.
Following behind Eric, I decided to get in line before it got even longer. The cashier was still Joshua, and the anticipation grew every time I moved closer and closer. When I was about four people away, I noticed that the bruising on Joshua's face had nearly faded away. Joshua wore a regular bandaid this time to cover up the cut while he worked.
Remembering that trademark, smiley-face bandaid on Joshua's cheek made me fight the smile that tried to surface.
As soon as the two customers ahead finished ordering, another employee came up to Joshua and asked to switch places. It was Kenneth. He was a lot shorter than Joshua, but what stood out from Kenneth was his frost blue eyes that contrasted his dark hair. Kenneth was best known for his charming personality. Joshua stuck to the plan and ended up going to the far right of the counter to complete the orders.
Disappointment tickled me a bit, but I shook it off. Sneaking a glance at Joshua, he was busily working on the drinks that I didn't notice Kenneth was calling me next. Snapping out of it, I looked straight ahead and was greeted by the barista's welcoming grin.
"Hey Olivia! Good to see you."
I smiled. "Hi Kenneth, how have you been?"
"Busy, but I've been great. Senior year treating you well?" The second year college student questioned.
"Yeah, so far so good."
"Glad to hear," Kenneth contently replied. "Let me guess? You look like you're in the mood for a green tea latte!"
Releasing a bashful laugh, I nodded at his expanded knowledge. Kenneth quickly rang me up and handed me the change and receipt. Thanking him, I gave Kenneth another smile until he stopped me.
There was a cryptic expression on Kenneth's face. "Got your eyes on the new guy, huh?"
In disbelief with what I heard, my lips only parted. Not daring to ask again, I shook my head as an immediate answer.
Kenneth chuckled before he nodded, letting the topic drop. A little flustered being put on the spot like that, I didn't hesitate to head back to my spot.
While I waited for my order, I promptly pulled my textbook out of my backpack to start my dreaded physics homework. Because I forgot to do my homework last time, Mr. Brenner allowed students to make up three late assignments. Looking over the chapter and then the problems, I already knew this was going to be a long night for me.
Grabbing my pencil from the pouch of my bag, I nearly jolted from surprise when I heard someone say from behind.
"Nurse Sandpaper, here's your green tea latte."
Looking over my shoulder, Joshua was standing before me with my order in his hand. A mischievous grin occupied his face because of my reaction.
Fully shifting to face him, my eyes dropped into thin slits. "Nurse Sandpaper?"
"You like it?" Joshua placed the mug down a fair distance from my school work and claimed proudly, "I came up with the name while I was making your order."
Feeling the flush of red on my cheeks, I huffed, "No, it's horrible!"
"No, it's because your hands were as rough as sandpaper that one time. I hope you started using something called lotion."
"Go eat shit," I hissed.
Hearing Joshua's laugh in reply made me snap a glare at him.
However, my expression softened when I noticed how the edges of Joshua's eyes crinkled a bit as he covered his laughter. Joshua looked adorable that it sickened me for having those thoughts. Ignoring him, I pulled the mug closer to me and looked at the latte art.
I arched an eyebrow. "What... is that?"
"It's a cat."
Taking a closer look, the white foam shaping of the cat was actually well done. The cheeks of the cat was blushing red, and the cat even wore a bow on the top center of its head. Everything about the cartoon cat seemed right except the identical, oversized brown circles that I assumed were the eyes.
"Why does this cat have such huge eyes?" I asked.
Joshua expressed nonchalantly, "Even though it's not hazel, it matches how big your eyes are."
I retaliated, "My eyes aren't that big!"
"Okay, I might have over-exaggerated," Joshua noted, "your eyes are nice to look at though, Nurse Sandpaper."
Although that nickname Joshua gave me was nothing but distasteful, my heart skipped when I heard Joshua comment about my eyes. That caused me to shut up. Glancing back at him, I noticed pass his shoulder that people were still coming in and out for drinks and desserts.
"Thanks," I returned back to hide my embarrassment, "but, I'm going to come up with a better name for you."
"Good luck with that. Enjoy," Joshua commented with a faint smile before he walked back to the front.
Returning back to my regular position, I continued to stare at the cat and almost didn't want to drink it away.
+ + +
Two hours passed, and I was still stuck on problem number three.
I was nowhere near solving whatever I needed to find. My drink was already gone, along with the sandwich Eric had bought me earlier since he "owed" me for how he has been acting lately. Even though I insisted that he was being too dramatic about the matter, I was always grateful for a friend like Eric.
Growing frustrated, I dropped my pencil and leaned back on the chair. As I rubbed my temples, I thought it'd be the best idea to take a short bathroom break and hopped down the stool. Observing the perimeter, Soulatte Café wasn't as busy anymore. There were still people occupying the couches and tables. Even though the line grew sporadically, it became more manageable for the males working in the front and the kitchen.
Once I got out of the bathroom, I found Eric making a few drinks.
Walking over to him, I called out from the thin glass barrier that separated us, "Eric, you busy?"
His dark brown eyes looked like he already predicted what I was up to, but he still answered with a no.
When I clapped my hands and asked for his help, Eric exhaled slowly before he turned around to glance at the clock. After Eric finished the drink he was working on, he politely handed it to the waiting customer before lightly nudging Kenneth who was crafting a mouth-watering waffle with vanilla ice cream and chopped fruits on top.
"I'm gonna take my break. You good?"
Kenneth gave a short nod which left him and the other three employees responsible for the front. Joshua was currently working in the kitchen. While Eric took off his apron, I gave him a look of gratitude as we walked back to where I was sitting.
Taking the stool next to me, Eric grinned in a teasing matter. "Physics?"
"Yes! I'm so close to throwing this useless textbook out the window."
"Now, we don't want that to happen." Eric chuckled as his eyes scanned the textbook.
After a minute, Eric asked for a pencil and paper, and I handed it over in a blink of an eye.
Leave it to Eric Park who can transform one of the world's toughest subjects — according to me — into elementary school level. His explanations were crystal clear and made me realize that I was overanalyzing all the simple things. Eric managed to explain the whole two chapters in a span of fifteen minutes, and I was able to solve the gruesome problem three with no hesitation.
Giving him a hug, he shrugged in return. "Don't mention it. Are you staying until closing?"
Pursing my lips at first, I answered, "I'm not sure yet since my mom should be coming home around that time. I really want to get this all done though."
"You will. Let me know if you need any more help."
I smiled in thanks before I ended up asking, "So, is Joshua fit for the job?"
Eric didn't mind my question and answered through an honest tone, "He's a fast learner, and a lot of customers like him. You know what? I think Joshua has a fan club formed because a lot of girls regularly stop by."
Not knowing why I felt a bit struck by the news of Joshua having a "fan club", I could only imagine how all of this was getting to Joshua's head. I bet his ego danced whenever he worked.
I didn't wait to remind Eric with complete sincerity, "Don't worry, you're still the most popular out of the guys."
Eric smiled as his eyes shaped into half moons at the same time.
A lot of girls fell for that every time.
"We'll see this Valentine's Day," he mentioned.
Completely forgetting that Valentine's Day was coming up this Tuesday, I automatically started to dread it.
It wasn't because I was lonely that day, but every single year, Drew Larkin would send me a Valentine gram to tease me since 'no guy gave me chocolates or confessed their love to me, so it was his duty to do so'. Not looking forward to the next few days, I shook those thoughts away because I had more important things to focus on.
After thanking Eric again for his help, his break unfortunately came to an end. I felt bad that he spent it explaining the ways of physics, but he insisted that it wasn't a problem. Returning back my homework, I was able to finish the rest of my late homework and half of my actual homework within the next hour until my phone started to ring.
Catching the name, I grimaced but decided to go outside and take the call.
It was my dad.
Letting the cool air sink through my skin, I clicked the answer button and picked up with a hello.
"Hello Livy, it's your dad. Are you busy?"
Even though I was fully aware of the identity of the caller because of the common cell phone feature known as caller ID, I sometimes believed that my blank moments came from my dad.
"Hey Dad. No. What did you need to talk about?"
"Well," he sighed briefly on the other line before continuing, "I didn't have a chance to talk about this with you yesterday, but your mother told me about the scholarship."
I could feel my mood dropping in disinterest. "And, what about it?"
"Livy, you don't need to rely on a silly scholarship to go to the school you want to. I'm sure there are better ones out there anyway. Don't you worry, I can help with the tuition —"
"No," I immediately interrupted.
"If you'd give me a chance —"
"Dad, no."
"Livy, what's the matter? Did I say something wrong?"
"Don't call me Livy. Only Grandma Lilith and Aunt Elisa can call me that. And, don't tell me that it's a silly scholarship because it isn't. I work hard for things, especially if it's something I really care about. You may think the scholarship is pointless because you can afford anything, but it means everything to me. Even if I wanted your help, your money wouldn't be the answer. You think money can solve every situation, but it doesn't. You want to know what would help me?"
"Livy —" My dad tried to interrupt, but I wouldn't let him.
"It would be your support, but I would only be kidding myself because you don't know how to show support. You never did. Don't call me again if you think something I find so important is a joke to you."
As I spoke into the receiver, my voice started to crack, and I held back the tears that were welling up in my eyes. My frustration that was bottled up from Saturday managed to spill out unwillingly.
"Olivia... that wasn't supposed to sound like I was ridiculing you."
"But it did. I need to go," I answered curtly and didn't bother for a reply.
Clicking the end call button, I hastily turned my phone off and shoved it in the back of my pocket.
Walking away from the windows, I sat down against the wall of the corner of the café and released the traitor tears that fell down my face. My throat ached as I cupped my mouth to muffle out the sobs. I hated how vulnerable I got around my dad. Even when it was just a simple phone call, he knew which buttons to push without trying.
"Stupid, stupid," I scolded for allowing myself to cry about the matter.
Pulling my knees closer, I buried myself in my hair and cried it all out. I thought that I would be better in a few minutes, but it wasn't working very well. Good thing there weren't any people who usually walked around this side.
Wiping my tears away, I forced to recompose myself before going back inside. I couldn't have Eric or Joshua or anyone see me. It would be fatal for someone to catch me in this state.
"Olivia, is that you?"
Too late.
The sound of footsteps approaching me echoed louder and louder. I wanted to tell the voice to go away, but my voice was nonexistent at the time.
Lifting my head up slowly, the shadowed figure had dropped what looked like a backpack and began to crouch down to look at me. Because it was nighttime, it was difficult to clearly see who that person was. With enough light coming from the moon and the familiar scent of his cologne, I wanted to crawl into the dark abyss when the person ended up being Joshua Anderson.
Those emerald green eyes observed me carefully before I hid my face once more. When I found my voice and told him to go away, my surroundings fell silent. I really thought Joshua did leave, but that would have meant hearing footsteps walk away. The second time I looked up, Joshua was still there, crouching on his feet.
I sniffled. "Please leave me alone right now."
He didn't move and asked through a concerned whisper, "What happened?"
Wiping my nose, my voice betrayed me. "N-nothing. Just go, please."
"I'm not going anywhere. I know something happened."
"Nothing… happened. I need to be alone."
"Olivia," Joshua pressed on.
I snapped, "Fuck! Joshua, are you deaf? I want to be alone! I don't want to deal with people right now especially since my dad decided to run his mouth at me. He just doesn't understand a single thing. I'm so sick of it. I don't need any of his crap, and I sure as hell don't need anymore coming from you or anybody else. So, I'm asking you one last time to walk away and leave."
At that point, I was beyond hysterical as I attempted shoving all those words inside Joshua's head.
However, my locker buddy had a thick skull because he didn't flinch back once I finished tearing his head off with my bitter retort.
Joshua's expression was not the typical kind he would have on. As Joshua listened to me blindly talk about my dad, the glow in his green eyes gradually washed out. His lips that were usually formed into a smug grin were now stuck in a straight line.
Tearing my gaze away from him, I let out an exhausted sigh. "Just go."
Without notice, I heard Joshua shift. I then felt his arms wrap around my shivering body this winter night. The warmth of his embrace sent tiny ripples of shock and comfort throughout my body. The hug was unexpected, but a hug that was well needed. Joshua held me together in one piece as I cried freely into his chest, probably ruining his white shirt.
My ears listened to Joshua's tender and soothing voice.
"Olivia, don't cry and waste those tears. I may not know or fully understand what you are going through, but you don't have to go through this alone. If you don't want to listen to me, you can go and cry all you want because I'll be right here. I won't go anywhere."
I wished that Joshua didn't see me like this. I wished that he didn't stay and offer his shoulder for me to cry on. I wished that he didn't say those words to me because they were words that were only said by people who truly cared and wouldn't leave. I was scared that Joshua was only here because he pitied the hopeless crybaby outside.
The last thing I wanted was for Joshua Anderson to discover what made me so weak.
I hiccuped. "You're an idiot, you know that? People normally just walk away."
Feeling my body move, I realized that Joshua had created a space between us.
From my eye level, all I saw was the tear stained work shirt of Joshua's. Suddenly, I felt a warm hand graze across my cheek to wipe away the tears I missed. Pulling enough strength to glance up at Joshua, he still bore the same expression as before.
His green eyes were so clear and filled with concern.
Joshua then smiled a different smile at me.
It was the first time he showed that side of him. That smile of his was so captivating that it would be forever etched in my memory.
"I guess you can say that I'm the idiot who doesn't want to be like normal people, and the idiot who wants to be there for the nurse who helped him when he was in need — not because the idiot feels obligated to but because he cares."
______________________
Dedicating this to EstelleLux - thanks for all your sweet support!