Zayn can practically hear Julien whining about how he's the third wheel now as he sits with Antoine who just shrugs, and Louis who has his eyes glancing over their table every now and then. Zayn would catch his gaze sometimes whenever his eyes dart over Harry's shoulder and the latter is trying not to make anything out of it if Zayn is feeling more comfortable with Louis' presence nearby instead of him.
Well, at least he's sitting across from him, knees almost touching, eyes fixed on him most of the time, and if he extended his arms and leaned forward they might be closer. But for some reason, even though he was minutes ago between his arms, Zayn seems distant.
"How about we go somewhere else?"
Zayn raises his brows, "I don't really think that those French people around us will understand, and it's not like they're being loud nor that I get anything from what they're saying either-"
"A place where we can have some privacy" Harry corrects himself and Zayn's eyes glance over Louis for a second before returning to his. Zayn giggles, looking down and shaking his head and Harry furrows his brows. Zayn passed the 'I might want to hold you closer, get your eyes to be only on me, be less distracted, and talk more privately' part and went right away to the 'I might as well want your body pressed to mine while I have my lips on yours again and my hands exploring your body, and if our clothes happen to be no longer there, then I'm not complaining' part.
"Alright" Zayn lifts his head again, a smile still present on his face, amused, and Harry doesn't waste time getting up and paying for their nearly untouched drinks. He sees Zayn motioning for Louis that he'll call him later and Louis waves back with a smile on his face mouthing a 'Have fun' before they're out.
=====
Zayn can't use his room and Harry wouldn't want to go back after the scenario that happened there, and he also didn't want the public attention, he knows Zayn wouldn't talk anyway when there is a possibility his 'new friends' could hear. It's not that he minds having him close anyway. Zayn didn't object when he booked a room for a night, settling across from each other on the sofa, a big pillow in his lap as he relaxes into the soft material.
"So why did you move to France?" He asks, because Zayn wanted to talk, and they'll talk. Hopefully they can let each other's secrets out.
Zayn shrugs, "Louis wanted to"
Harry raises his brows, "Last time I checked, you didn't have enough money"
"We ..." Zayn replies slowly, eyes glancing around and avoiding his, "Got the money" Harry gives him a blank face as Zayn's eyes return to his slowly and he sighs, "Knew someone that paid for us" He replies quietly instead of 'I made a guy fall in love with me then broke his heart and left with his money. Well, not quite, I didn't really steal his money' But Harry's eyes are still suspicious, a question in them that Zayn doesn't want to answer so he resorts to changing the subject, "You know why I didn't want to stay in the first place. I got a chance and I took it, France was just Louis' choice, but I'd have gone anywhere to be honest" Harry nods slowly. "Why are you?"
"Well ..." He takes a deep breath, "After I lost my place at the tournament-"
"Wait, why?" Zayn interrupts him. He remembers Harry telling him that he didn't win.
"Got disqualified after missing my matches"
Zayn blinks, "Why?" He repeats.
"Family issues" Zayn frowns as Harry rolls his eyes, averting his gaze too and pausing like he's remembering something or thinking about someone. "I needed to clear my head and I wouldn't go without Joshua" Zayn mentally winces. He doesn't exactly hate Joshua, but he certainly doesn't like him either. He does feel bad for him though, getting inside their mess.
"How did he take it?"
"We talked" Harry replies, "He was ready to stay despite what happened but I just ... I couldn't" Harry's eyes are still away from his, and the situation turned from him closing on himself to Harry's doing so instead. "Which reminds me" Harry looks at him again, "Who are the two with you and Louis?"
"Julien is the one you saw with me, we're just friends" Harry cocks an eyebrow at that and Zayn has to roll his eyes, "Nothing happened between us, ever. He even has someone of his own ... And the other one sitting with Louis is Antoine who's also his current love interest"
"He moves on really quick"
"Not really" Zayn frowns, "You don't know Louis"
"Don't want to" Harry mumbles but Zayn heard it and the look Harry receives makes him feel like he'd done something wrong. He knows Louis is a line he shouldn't cross with Zayn and he doesn't want to, keeping Louis off topic should've been for the best ... But Zayn's eyes are telling him otherwise. So he moves closer, pulling at Zayn's ankles slowly until his legs are uncrossed making him slide further into the sofa. "I'm only interested in you" He settles between his legs and grabs at the pillow to get it out of the way but Zayn clutches on it tighter. "Fine, you can keep the pillow"
Zayn's eyes are trailing down as he bites on his bottom lip, but Harry doesn't get to kiss those lips because Zayn is turning his head to the side. Well, Harry doesn't mind planting kisses on the side of his face.
"I thought we're having a decent conversation?" Zayn tries not to sink too much into Harry's gentle touches at his thighs or his lips trailing on his neck. "Harry ..." He tries once again, his voice betraying him as he closes his eyes for a moment feeling Harry humming into his skin. In a final attempt, he turns his head again, Harry's head moving up to ghost over his lips. "I want to know about you" He whispers into Harry's lips and he doesn't exactly know if he should wait for Harry's reply or his lips closing on his instead.
But Harry leans back with a sigh. "What do you wanna know about me?"
"Why did you miss your matches?" Zayn asks quietly, repeating his question and Harry sits back.
"My father kept calling me, more times than usual, and I when I went home to see him he ... wasn't exactly himself ... Talked about his company, we argued, and then I left. A week later, I got informed that his bank account is officially mine. I didn't want it, we argued for some more on the phone until I went home to attend my finals, found my step-mom by his side all the time and I wanted to avoid both when she started to be extra kind, and then I knew ... The reason why he originally transferred his money to me, why my step-mom is trying her best to get close to me again, why he wants me to attend his meetings ..." Zayn sits up slowly, lips parted and eyes wide as Harry turns to look at him, "He won't tell me, thinks I'm better off that way, but I know ... He's slowly dying"
"I'm sorry"
Harry shakes his head, "He still attends his meetings like there's nothing wrong with him, I got distracted and missed my matches. Thought a week off might cool me down with Joshua, then you appeared, and well ... Here we are"
"I don't mean to interfere but" Zayn starts carefully, "You were going to see him today" Harry just shrugs. "He's your family, Harry. You shouldn't have picked me over him"
"Not everyone shares a family bond like you and Louis" Harry replies quietly.
Zayn presses his lips together for a moment. Something that he's actually glad of that he and Louis share such bond. "I know he's not that bad. He at least cares for you" Harry stays quiet, eyes on the floor instead, "If he's trying to fix things up you should let him ... I can't imagine losing the only person you consider as family ... He's not staying for long, Harry. And if you don't want his money or his company, I believe he'd been trying to listen if you chose the right words"
"You're the last person I'd expect to say so"
"Yet you've given me lots of chances" Zayn smiles. "And you among all should know already that I care a lot for my family" He crosses his arms and leans back on the sofa.
"I can book a ticket tomorrow's morning" Zayn hums, "You're still staying?"
"I can't go back"
"I can hire a lawyer" Harry suggests.
"Doing what? He can't get us out"
"Not really, you'll be just paying a fine"
Zayn raises his brows, "I don't own that much money"
"I can pay for you"
"Thought you don't want your father's money?" Zayn retorts and Harry sighs.
"Can make an exception" Harry shrugs.
"No" Zayn shakes his head, "I actually like it here"
"How are you managing anyway?" Harry furrows his brows, "You don't even have a job"
"Um ..." Zayn pauses, "We were actually heading to Lyon, once we're there, we were going to find something ..."
Harry takes a deep breath, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. "So you'll stay here" It's not a question and Harry's tone seems off making Zayn frown.
"Pretty much ..."
"I'm seriously impressed how you two manipulate the law to stay wherever you like and do whatever you want" Harry opens his eyes again, "Can't live clean for a day, can you?"
"Well, I'm sorry we're not that rich or powerful to survive through legal work. Yeah, I don't regret a thing"
Harry turns to him again and stares, Zayn stares back, a challenge in his eyes that Harry doesn't want to take so he sighs. "So ... This will be a long-distance shit?"
"Long-distance-relationship"
Harry smiles, "We're in a relationship. Cool" Zayn furrows his brows, "Might as well try to work this relationship" Zayn opens his mouth but he doesn't really know what to say. He's mainly confused to what Harry is referring to. "I'm offering a solution"
"And I'm not leaving" Zayn replies sternly.
"What do you have here?" Harry raises his voice. "You barely know the place!"
"Well, I certainly don't have anything there" Zayn retorts, sitting up as well.
"So I'm nothing to you?" Harry raises his brows, "You're not even ready to take a shot for me! You're just expecting me to follow you everywhere?! So when we're settling down you can run off again?!"
Zayn sighs, rubbing his temples to calm himself down in order not to start a fight. "I didn't say that" Harry crosses his arms, anger clear in his face as it remains hard. "I can't leave Louis" He says slowly, quietly, and raises his gaze to look into Harry's eyes.
"I didn't even say I'm separating you two. Louis can come along" Harry replies quietly too.
"He likes Antoine, he's happy. I can't take that away from him for my own happiness, we've talked about this far too many times, Harry" Zayn sighs and keeps his gaze locked with Harry's, perhaps it would get his point delivered. He really likes him, and yes, he would very much like to stay with him anywhere, but Louis comes first, it's always been this way. Harry doesn't reply for a while, just keeps staring at him until he sighs as well, defeated, knowing too well it's futile to argue with Zayn when Louis is involved.
"And how do you plan for this to work?"
"It's not like we won't talk to each other, it's just ... For a while" Zayn pauses, "I can't force you to visit but it'd make it work" Harry fights the urge to shout at Zayn.
"This is what you meant by me staying?"
"Not entirely" Zayn mumbles, "If you can't then I'm used to it anyway" He turns his head away.
"Being apart?"
"Missing you" Harry opens his mouth to reply but he closes it again, exhaling slowly. Isn't this what he wanted anyway? He is sure he can't stay away for long and would be dragging himself towards Zayn every single time, so he just gives up, fighting again won't lead them anywhere, if anything, they'll be hurt, they'll be separated until they're together again, and the loop goes on and on. Harry might at least try to skip a step or two for Zayn.
"Do you have enough money to even afford a place in Lyon?"
Zayn turns to him again, "I'm not going to use yours"
"Just for a while" He repeats Zayn's words but the latter still shakes his head.
"We'll figure something out"
"Why I don't like the idea of that?"
Zayn knows why, Harry too, and perhaps he's waiting for an answer from him but Zayn just gives him a stern look. "We'll figure something out" He repeats and Harry –for the millionth time– decides to drop it.
=====
Despite their arguments, Zayn agreed to stay, well, Harry didn't exactly ask him to, but he would never say no though. Each stayed on their side until they drifted to sleep and Harry woke up with Zayn in his arms again. Only this time he's actually allowed to stare, to trace his fingers wherever on Zayn's body, tops and pants off with only their boxers on because they didn't have a change of clothes, a cool summer breeze touching their bare skin.
Harry inhales deeply at Zayn's hair, his back pressed to his chest, arms on the bed while Harry has his own around his waist, fingers tracing lightly random shapes on his skin as he lips press softly at the back of his neck, Zayn's long hair making it difficult to reach the skin actually but he likes it, swiping it to the side to have more access to the side of his neck, and Zayn tilts his head backwards with a deep inhale. Harry smiles against his skin.
"Morning"
Zayn stretches his arms, "Thought you had a plane to catch" Harry hums, opening his mouth to suck on his neck but Zayn turns to him so he pecks him on the lips instead.
"Want me out so fast?" Harry smiles seeing Zayn blinking slowly his long lashes, hands reaching up to cup his face and Harry leans in again, slower this time, kissing him properly, arms still around his waist as he brings him closer again and pulls Zayn on top of him, trying to deepen the kiss when Zayn pulls back, enough for Harry's head to rest on the pillows again as he pushes him down when he tries to chase after him.
"When are you leaving?" Zayn asks as he puts his arms over Harry's chest, head propped up on them and legs resting on his sides.
Harry tilts his head to the side to glance at the clock, "An hour"
Zayn is off him in the next second and he doesn't have time to protest as Zayn picks his clothes and throws them on the bed. "You need to get up then"
"Just ... five more minutes?" Harry pouts and Zayn looks at him for a second before a smile stretches on his face but shakes his head.
"Cute, but I'm not falling for it" He grabs his own clothes, "Get up" He repeats as he disappears into the bathroom for a quick shower, giving Harry his 'five more minutes in bed' even if he meant the two of them in bed.
"You did fall for it" Harry shouts but gets no response even though he knows Zayn heard it and smiles to himself widely.
=====
"Since when do we refuse money?"
Zayn rolls his eyes, "Harry is not someone we toy with"
Louis sighs, "Could've borrowed some" Zayn looks up from his phone and Louis shrugs, "Saves us some time. Could be thinking about other stuff instead"
"We can just say we're staying for a while. An emergency or something. They're not the type to dig deep anyway"
"Yeah ..." Louis says slowly, "Less caring"
Zayn doesn't need to say anything, Louis' eyes are giving away his feelings. Antoine would call, he'd take him out, but that's it. There is the possibility of him not wanting to invade their privacy, but the main issue that both are trying to avoid is what if this was a summer fling?
"Well ... I'll take a shower and then we're off, yeah?" Zayn nods, gaze back on his phone as Louis walks away, "Tell your lover boy I said hi!" Zayn chuckles and shakes his head, and right on cue, Harry calls instead of texting back so he swipes the answer button.
"Hey" He lays back on the couch, dressed and ready, waiting for Louis to finish so they can go 'job hunting' or 'money collecting' sort of, his voice is quiet, and a smile creeps on his face as he waits for Harry's reply which comes after a short pause.
"I thought you'll be missing me?" He can almost picture him pouting.
Zayn furrows his brows, "It's been only three days, Harry, and we do text each other"
"Right. Feels like we're back to all those times we're off"
"It's different" Zayn objects, "We're not off, and we talk to each other" He rolls his eyes because Harry would blame him for not calling first, Zayn would apologize because he didn't want to disturb Harry knowing that he's back at collage doing his catch-up lessons and dealing with his family issues, so before Harry gets to say it, he beats him to the question. "How's everything? Your studies? Your father? How's Mike by the way?"
He hears Harry sighing first before answering. "Good, I guess? My classes are not that bad, a bit too much work to be honest ... And since when do you care about Mike?"
"He's your friend, I just thought ..." Zayn shakes his head, "What about your father?"
There's another pause and Zayn waits, doesn't push him into it. "He got a divorce"
Zayn blinks, "What?"
"I might had been the cause of it and I'm not regretting anything, she wasn't ..." He sighs again, "She was never going to be a replacement to someone that shouldn't be replaced in the first place" Zayn presses his lips together. Maybe Harry is wrong, maybe his father was trying to move on but he is not letting him, and he knows, can clearly expect Harry's next words. "I'm glad he's finally seeing it now ... Getting rid of her for good. She got compensated, no damage is done" No. Your father wanted to make you happy before he dies. He's picking you over her because he loves you more, because you're his remaining family. Zayn hopes Harry at least gets the message.
"Did you get to talk to him? Just the two of you? Settle things up?"
"He's ..." There's a long pause and Zayn actually worries when he hears Harry sniffing. "They're making him stay at the hospital. He'd been overworking, making sure everything goes smoothly in the business. I told him it'll hurt him more, he just wouldn't listen!" Harry's tone isn't calm anymore and he hears him taking a deep breath to calm himself. "Said I can do whatever I want and that he'll always wish the best for me, and blah blah" Zayn shakes his head again. Maybe Harry doesn't want to admit it? Maybe he's in denial? Seeing his father dying ... Zayn knows it's tough. His gaze picks up automatically to lock itself on the bathroom door, the sound of the water running and Louis' soft humming so he knows he's okay, and feels his heart clenching in his chest. He wouldn't live a second more if anything is to happen to Louis. His heartbeat would stop the exact same second Louis' does.
"I can't meet you anytime soon ..." Harry's voice breaks his trance and he averts his gaze from the bathroom door. "I'm not handling anything in the company but I still own some shit. Shares or whatever, never been the one in business administration stuff, but I guess that means I still keep the money since he won't take it back" Zayn takes a deep breath. No. Harry isn't staying for that at all. "Have to finish collage too" No. Not that either.
"Where are you now?" Zayn asks quietly.
"Home" The way Harry says it makes him feel that Harry isn't that comfortable staying at his place. And he knows why. "I should be on my way soon ..." He trails but doesn't hang up. "I wish you'd be here, you know?" Harry's tone is quieter and Zayn blinks at the ceiling.
"You can call me whenever, yeah?" He offers instead, knowing too well the meaning behind Harry's words, been there when he was the most down, and he too wishes he was close.
"Yeah ... So how are you holding up?"
"Good"
"Good as in you're not going to tell me?" Harry asks slowly and Zayn pauses a little before answering.
"Good as in we're doing fine"
"Anything I should worry about?" Zayn parts his lips and closes them for a second. For some reason Harry seems to ask about 'anyone' instead, and he might be smiling for it if he didn't like the thought of it. Every time Harry would see him something bad happens, usually nothing out of the ordinary for him and Louis but Harry wasn't that much involved in their lives. And Harry should know that even if something did happen, Zayn is not going to actually whine and seek help from him. But he has to assure him nevertheless, Harry already has too much on his plate.
"No. We're fine ... We're alive. I am talking to you. Do I not sound okay?"
He hears Harry's chuckle and half-smiles. "Don't know if that should sound comforting but ... Promise me I'll see unharmed yeah?"
"Promise" He smiles wider, "I don't want to get you late, you should hang up"
"Yeah, alright. Talk to you soon. Love you lots" He hears Harry making a kissing sound and he chuckles.
"Take care. Bye" Zayn hangs up just in time for Louis to open the door.
"Gimme five minutes" Zayn smiles and nods at Louis before looking down on his phone again, Harry's contact is in view.
Harry must be heading to the hospital by now. His studies are piling because he's not focusing, and he is staying because he fears his father will pass away anytime soon.
Zayn is expecting a teary call next.
=====
"Pretty much sure we could've had a better luck with Julien around. I'm positive I could've gotten something out of him without blowing our cover. We literally know nothing other than insult words and a few sentences we can help ourselves with aside from the horrible translator app"
Zayn finishes with a huff as Louis finally turns to him, face neutral. "Why are relying on others?"
"I'm not-" Zayn studies Louis' face, careful if he's missing something in his off tone. "What did you do?" He gives Louis a knowing look and the latter sighs.
"Just saying that he wouldn't have answered your calls anyway"
"And why is that?" Zayn raises his brows.
"Let's say I hate someone and got in a fight with. Would you help that person?"
Zayn blinks at him, "What did you do?" He repeats.
"I broke up with Antoine" Zayn blinks at him again, "Better to walk out on my own" He shrugs, "Seemed broken for some reason though. Didn't really matter. Wasn't more than 'liking each other' phase"
"Louis-" Zayn starts.
"Long story short, there was someone ... I was a replacement"
"You said he was hurt?" Zayn furrows his brows.
"Never said there wasn't any feelings from his side" Louis shrugs again. "I'm better on my own. Don't care what he wants"
Zayn approaches him with his next exhale, eyes trying to read Louis' again, the comforting color of the sea still shining in them, and tries again, "Louis ..."
"Same reason, Zayn" He shakes his head, "Wouldn't change a thing" He smiles, not his bright one but Zayn can identify it as something comfortable despite the face that Louis might be hiding his feelings from him, shielding himself for them. "Wasn't that the case with Joshua?" He turns around and Zayn stands still for a second before hurrying after him.
"No" He grabs Louis' arm, gently spinning him around, keeping his hands there as he grips tighter on Louis' forearm. "I honestly don't know about Joshua's feelings. Might be able to imagine the scene from Harry's words, but no. It's not the same, Louis. I've been there ... You never asked yourself if he's hurting because he was trying with you ... I was at the other side of the relationship. What if it was you there instead?"
"Still the same" Louis repeats slowly. "Know when you were pulling and pushing at each other? Because there was something there? And don't give me the 'me and you are the same' bullshit, we're not, Zee" Zayn opens his mouth to protest but Louis keeps going, "I'm not saying I didn't feel anything but ..." He shrugs, "I don't have this pull in my heart. Don't want to get attached easily to something isn't reaching me deep down ... Like you said, it's different"
Zayn sighs, "This is the new you? Along with no plans?"
Louis smiles widely, "Living for the moment, Zayn. Feels great to be free, bro" Zayn smiles back, if Louis is fine he's fine even though he still has his doubts and will have to drag Louis into one of their late-night-conversations to have an open heart-to-heart moment. Hopefully everything will go well. "I can clearly see your point now" Louis continues, "Not having to worry about your feelings is a good thing. Glad to have just you"
Zayn's smile widen, "Always, bro"
"Great! We're on our way then!" Louis announces louder and Zayn groans, shoulders slumping and head falling on Louis' shoulder. He doesn't protest though, they need the money, they need some sort of income to provide a decent life, and even if he's very tired, he won't leave Louis alone. He makes a mental note to himself that they should make some friends, people who aren't interested in them, people who can't get too close. "We're legally moving, Zayn" Zayn lifts his head to give him an unimpressed look. They don't do 'legal'. "Could've been resting at home, but you already wasted that opportunity"
Zayn sighs and moves away from Louis. A small part of him actually wants to accept Harry's offer. He can repay him later ... He guesses he could somehow. Louis starts walking again when his phone vibrates in his jeans and he picks it up, heart beating faster as his figure grows still. Here we go.
"Where are you?"
Zayn furrows his brows, "Where are you?"
=====
It's not that Zayn wasn't expecting this, he was, but he is starting to wonder when did he exactly fall so deeply to care for someone other than Louis. Seeing the red eyes, the tired posture, and he wonders for a second time why Harry chose to fly here instead of calling.
He told Louis he needs to get back and strictly told him to postpone their 'search' for a later date, he doesn't want Louis to roam on his own, not here, not without him, he's not burdening him when his own relationship issues gets in the way despite Louis' reminder that postponing their search isn't in their favor, but he would still smile and usher him to go.
His mind goes automatically back to the night Louis was held in the hospital and Harry made sure he's okay before leaving, staying the night and grounding him until he got the call that he can finally see Louis. And finding Harry waiting now, arriving before him and standing outside his door, a sad and desperate look on his eyes like he's about to break. Zayn doesn't want to hear his next words, won't allow Harry to break while he's here. So he moves quickly, arms linking themselves behind Harry's neck, Harry's arms tightening around his waist and bringing him closer to his body, muffled words against the material of his shirt and damp spots appearing on it. Zayn lets him, even if he can't find the appropriate words to soothe his pain, he can hold him, be the one to comfort him if that's what Harry so desires.
And even though Zayn doesn't want to let go, they're literally standing outside their door, and Zayn hates their neighbors here so he pulls back slightly, hands falling to Harry's biceps and turning his head to him but Harry doesn't acknowledge his movement, holding tightly like he'd fall apart if he let go, and Zayn takes a deep breath before biting his bottom lip, brows furrowing in sorrow as he slowly moves his hands to Harry's face to try get him to look up.
Harry does that at least, pulling his head back and looking into his eyes, and Zayn brings their foreheads together for comfort, noes touching, and he whispers into his lips that they should go inside. He pulls Harry inside once he unlatches himself from him and gets him to his room, perhaps he needs some sleep, or just to lie down and relax, calming his brain for a moment and giving his body time to adjust. He didn't call, and Zayn doesn't know when exactly it happened, Harry didn't say that yet, just kept on rambling about one scene over and over, mumbling about memories here and there, and Zayn would only listen.
He hears the click of the door when Harry is finally asleep, have been for a while actually, since he laid his head on the pillows, only his shoes discarded on the floor which Zayn helped him in that. Kept one of his hands stroking Harry's face gently while the other brushes through his hair, and he smiles when Harry relaxes, body sinking into the mattress as he backs away slowly, pulling the covers over Harry and getting up, closing the door behind him quietly and hearing shuffling noises in the next room indicating that Louis is in there, so he goes.
Louis' already changed, arrived after him by a couple of minutes, and Zayn realizes after a long day on the streets he needs a shower and a change of clothes as well. He doesn't bother Harry and instead borrows Louis' clothes, taking a long shower and trying to come up with a single word to comfort Harry.
Louis is on the bed when he gets out, so he drops in front of him, towel hanging on his head and Louis smiles, taking the towel from him and drying his hair.
"My tongue is tied, Lou" He whines, "I don't even know what to say if he ever spoken to me on the matter ... I let him talk and talk and I just ..." He sighs, feeling Louis taking the towel away from his head and a brush is soon replacing it and he closes his eyes.
"You don't need to" Louis whispers softly to him. "He chose to come here. He wanted to be with you. This is his comfort ... You don't need to talk"
Zayn opens his eyes again, staring at the crack in the wall in front of him. Still a good apartment though, something they can afford. "I can't be the silent side, Louis"
Louis hums, a hair tie is being wrapped around his hair before speaking up again, "You'll find the words eventually. I told you before, you know him more than I do. You don't plan for such thing, Zayn, it just comes out naturally" Zayn turns his head to him and Louis smiles, "I'm starving. You're in?"
Zayn nods and gets up, following Louis into the kitchen. "We're running so low ..." Louis mumbles. "You know ..." He starts, eyes going up to meet Zayn's. "We could really use a hand"
Zayn raises his brows, "What happened to we 'only' rely on each other?"
"Isn't he considered close enough?"
Zayn pauses for a second, face frowning before opening his mouth. "I can't- Louis, I can't ask him such thing when he's like that!"
Louis shrugs, "I dunno, work your magic"
"Louis!" Zayn gives him a warning look. "I'm not. We're not"
Louis sighs, gaze dropping back to his plate. "Just saying ... It's tiring, Zee ... We barely know our way around"
"Was your incredible plan" Zayn mumbles, eyes still on Louis, "I told you we shouldn't" He shakes his head.
Louis drops the subject, an awkward silence takes over that Zayn doesn't feel it's comfortable for the very first time, and when Louis gets up without a word either, dumping the plate in the sink and going quietly to his room, Zayn feels an enormous weight being placed over his chest, so he gets up too and heads to Louis' room to find him sitting on the bed, phone in hand.
"It was a getaway, I approved. We don't work separately, and I understand. I just-" He sighs, shuffling closer to the bed and sitting next to Louis whose eyes drift up to meet him, face turned to his side. "We're desperate, I know. But we'll work it out like we always do. And ... I just need time"
"Time isn't in our favor, Zee" Louis drops his phone away, arms opening to let Zayn know that he's not mad at him, and Zayn snuggles happily to him. "But I too understand your position, I just ..." He takes a deep breath, "I'd rather think about a way to have you safe instead, and I don't care who's in the way"
Zayn looks up, eyes big and sparkling with fondness that makes Louis smile down at him. "I wouldn't think of another"
"It's late and we're both tired. Talk about this in the morning, yeah?" Louis suggests softly, hand reaching up to brush Zayn's cheeks and the latter nods. "Would it be okay to leave Harry on the other room alone?"
Zayn furrows his brows, head resting again against Louis' chest, "Um ..."
"I thought you're going for comfort?"
"I am-" Zayn protests but is cut off by Louis.
"Pretty much sure you'd favor a pair of strong arms around you instead" Louis teases, a smile on his face when Zayn glances up at him, but he doesn't move.
"Got the only pair I want already around me" He nuzzles further into Louis' chest, feeling him chuckle softly as his arms squeezes around his shoulders. "Will check on him though" He picks his head up, pulling away slightly. "Just ... To make sure he's okay"
"Sure" Louis smiles again and Zayn gets up, heading to his own room.
He opens the door slowly, eyes fixed on the bed first, and he furrows his brows when there's no figure lying down on it. His eyes glance around the room, and the figure is standing by the window instead. There are million thoughts that go inside Zayn's mind as he shuts the door behind him quietly. Harry must've heard the clicking sound of the door but he doesn't turn around, and Louis in the other room smiles as he flops on the bed and turns off the lights.
Zayn approaches him, back facing the window as his hands move to Harry's arms to gain his attention, folded against his chest as he leans forward. "Harry ..."
Harry just blinks forward, he's heard Zayn, but he also heard other things. He hates how his own body relaxed by the mere touch of Zayn's hands, only to have his eyes fluttering open the next moment to an empty bed. Like his body didn't accept the fact that Zayn's presence is no longer there. And the walls aren't exactly thick in this apartment, and Harry's eyes search around the buildings surrounding this one, the district Zayn gave him the address for, old and cracked and he doesn't think it's the right place for Zayn and Louis to stay in.
Harry knows that Louis and Zayn share a bond, an inseparable bond, that level of closeness that he can never dream to achieve with Zayn, and he knows that. Gaining a higher level than Louis in Zayn's heart is impossible. But he flew all the way here when he felt himself no longer capable of absorbing any more facts, when everyone being around him only made the air around him heavier, and he couldn't think of one more thing other than Zayn and he has no idea why. Since day one, whenever he'd face a problem with his family, Zayn just felt right to be with. Like he's holding his sanity of some sort, and he knows it's that much true when he neglected everything to be staring at those old buildings now. The hand on his arms soothing yet burning on his skin at the same time. Voice calling his name so softly, making Harry heal and break all over again. It's a never ending cycle with Zayn.
"Were you uncomfortable? Would you rather have a shower? A change of clothes? Not that I would find something that fit you but ..." Zayn trails off awkwardly, "Is the temperature not good for you?" Zayn searches Harry's blank face for anything, but his body fills with disappointment at how he can't comfort Harry. Not even his presence helps, Louis was wrong, he needs to say something. "Did you- um ... Have you eaten properly in the last few days?" Again, Harry just blinks his tired eyes forward, "Was it nightmares?" He asks more quietly, fearing that Harry has haunting ones now, but he just needs Harry to talk to him.
"This place is shit"
Zayn opens his mouth to reply and frowns, hands falling from Harry's arms to his side. "An affordable place" Harry doesn't say another word and he gazes up at him slowly biting his bottom lip. "Is this why you couldn't sleep?"
Harry takes a deep breath and shakes his head, pulling his phone out and going online. Zayn watches his movements, eyes glued on the screen when he realizes what Harry is doing. Booking a flight.
Zayn knows he shouldn't do lots of stuff in his life, that this isn't something he can interfere with, but his heart beats his brain, and his hands snatch Harry's phone in a swift move, locking it and placing it behind him. Harry turns to him, eyebrows raising up slowly in his forehead.
"No" Zayn says, "I'm not allowing you to go back in that state"
"I can't stay for long" Harry replies and it stings in Zayn's chest. He knows that, knows that Harry can't stay for long, knows that this is a fucked up relationship from the very start yet they kept going at it, and Zayn doesn't know if it's breaking them instead of healing the damaged parts, and he wishes it was different for the way he feels around Harry, but it isn't, and if Louis isn't the one to remind him that their lives are too fucked up to be fixed, his own brain would pop it up every five seconds to remind him that something good like Harry can't stay forever. Another cut at his heart that he'll probably cry to Louis about later.
"You came here for me. You moved away because you did not feel you were getting better. And I am not going to allow you to go back until you're fine" Zayn's voice is stern yet soft, and if Harry blinked, he might've missed how Zayn's eyelashes flutter too much or how there's a single crack in his voice. But that's not the issue, he knows Zayn cares as he moves closer again, turning Harry's body towards him and away from the window, a desperate look in his big beautiful eyes that got Harry caving each single time. "Please, just ... It hurts me to see you like this"
Zayn's hands move up to cup his face and Harry instantly leans in, tilting his head to have his lips fitting on Zayn's, hands trailing from Zayn's face to his neck and chest before wrapping themselves around Zayn's waist bringing him closer to himself.
"I missed you" He mumbles into Zayn's lips, initiating another kiss right away and feeling Zayn smile against his own.
"I missed you too" Zayn whispers back, and despite the fact that Zayn looks soft right now, he wants to back him against the wall for some reason, take off his hair-tie and tug on his hair. Something he's been dreaming about for a while now, ever since Joshua pulled Zayn off his lap, and Zayn's arms around his neck aren't helping his case with how much responsive he's being, with nothing to set them apart this time. His hands travel lower and Zayn's lips part on an inaudible gasp, pulling away for a second.
"Am I still not allowed to?" Harry pauses too, isn't sure exactly if Zayn is willing until Zayn is relaxing again, hands never falling from around his neck and kisses him again.
"You're allowed to do anything" He gasps again when Harry goes for his neck, "Just- thought y-you're tired"
"And I thought you don't wear leggings?" Harry pulls back, feeling the material under his touch, a smirk on his face as he looks down on Zayn.
Zayn stares up at him, "They're Louis'..."
"I like them on you"
"The last time you see them on me" Zayn whispers to him, a knowing smirk on his face as he pulls away and Harry has to smile watching him walking back to the door. "When was the last time you'd eaten properly?" Harry exhales deeply and shrugs, "Alright then, come on" He smiles and opens the door, and Harry doesn't know how he turned from desperately seeking his attention to being the one making Harry follow.
Again, Harry finds himself glancing around the apartment, making a mental note to himself to get Zayn out of this place before he leaves –if Zayn allows him to– and his attention goes back to Zayn as he serves him a plate, taking a seat across from him and leaning on his forearms on the table.
"My offer is still on the table"
Zayn looks up at him, stares for a moment before he gets what Harry is referring to. His lips part and close a couple of times before his bottom lip is being caught by his teeth and he glances away from Harry. He should accept, Louis is tired. He looks up again, Harry's eyes are hopeful despite his situation, eating quietly, and Zayn inhales slowly before nodding.
"Alright" Harry raises his brows, surprised maybe, "Just for a start" Zayn says and leans back in his chair and Harry smiles.
"Your cooking is impressive as usual too" Harry compliments and Zayn chuckles.
"That's actually Louis' cooking" He smiles brightly, eyes sparkling, and for the first time, Harry hates that spark. "He's amazing" Zayn gushes. Here goes Harry's appetite.
Zayn's smile falls when Harry stops eating, leaning back in his chair. "It's good" Harry assures him, unable to put on one of Zayn's perfect fake smiles on, "It's just that I didn't eat much in the last few days and I guess my stomach isn't used to more"
Zayn furrows his brows, eyes glancing down at Harry's plate and the crease between his brows deepen. What's exactly 'more'?
But he doesn't get to question much before Harry is pushing his chair back and getting up. Zayn stays there, hearing Harry's footsteps disappearing into his room again and he releases a long sigh before getting up as well, putting Harry's plate in the fridge because he's still hoping that Harry might want to eat again then shuffles after Harry.
His phone is back in his hands, sitting on the bed, and Zayn sighs before he enters the room and closing the door behind him. At least Harry's eyes snap up at him when he does and he settles next to him on the bed.
"You're still booking that flight" It's not a question, his eyes aren't focusing on Harry anymore, and perhaps Harry feels a little guilty that Zayn is trying for once and he isn't responding.
"Actually, finding you a decent place"
Zayn blinks a couple of times before his eyes widen, "Oh ..." He turns slowly to Harry, bottom lip caught in his teeth again, a hint of hope in his big eyes and a smile behind his lips. "So you're not ... You're staying? I mean, like, for a while?"
"I still have to go back, but yeah. For now" Harry nods and he feels a weight being lifted off his shoulders when Zayn smiles, face softening and posture relaxing. Zayn looks up at him again, staring for a moment before his gaze is shifting again, and a smile stretches on Harry's face when he notices the change in Zayn's behavior turning into something shy. "If you don't mind, I'll get comfortable" Harry stands up, taking his shirt off along with his pants, turning around to see Zayn staring at him and he approaches him again, leaning forward until he's on the same level with Zayn and kisses him, pushing gently until Zayn's back hit the mattress.
"You're restless" Zayn barely whispers against his lips with a smile and Harry sighs, kissing him one more time before pulling away and settling properly on the bed, head on the pillows so Zayn is able to sit up. "If you want, you can just lay back and relax. I'll do all the job" He gets closer, still dressed up, knees and hands on the bed as he reaches him and Harry can't help his mind from wondering again. But Zayn was right, he is so tired.
"Are you going to undress? Cause I think I fancy those leggings on you if I'm not going to see this sight again"
Zayn laughs, "They're actually comfortable. Louis knows how to pick the right fabric" He flops on the bed next to Harry. "But ..." He pulls the covers over them, "Not my type. You won't see me in them again, and don't try to convince me into it, I've had Louis my entire life and I'm not interested" Harry presses his lips shut because Zayn is also right about that. If Louis couldn't, who is he to even have a word in it? "And don't dare to ever buy me one. Ever" He warns before he's getting in a comfortable position in the bed. Harry turns to him, and Zayn still has his eyes open. "Shut the lamp"
Harry sighs, reaching to his side and turning it off, the room turning dark, window open and the curtains are pulled to the side to let the cool summer breeze in. Moonlight lighting Zayn's face, eyes gazing up at him and Harry just stares.
"I love your eyes"
Zayn flutters them, "Still not the first to compliment my eyes" Harry smiles widely and moves closer.
"No. But you wouldn't like it if it was someone else" Because Harry remembers their first encounter, when he was completely enchanted by Zayn's eyes –still is actually– and Zayn gave him a bored cold look that says 'try harder or not at all' but there's a smile now, a genuine soft one, and Zayn is lying next to him on the same bed, he can lean in and kiss him and Zayn would still have that smile on, can try and drive him to his edge on the same bed and Zayn would still have his smile on. He thinks it's a 'better' situation as his hand rest on Zayn's hip, fingers sneaking under his shirt to rub at his skin and Zayn willingly cuddles further into him, face buried in Harry's chest, hands trailing on his chest before they're resting on the bed and Harry reaches with his hands to untie Zayn's hair first, discarding the tie somewhere next to them before returning his arm to wrap around Zayn's waist, the other hand finding its way between the silky locks.
"What's on your schedule?"
Harry blinks, "My schedule?"
Zayn picks his head up, "What you're doing when you go back"
Harry sighs, "I've missed too many classes. Dunno if I can catch up, but I guess I have an excuse now?"
"And afterwards?" Harry looks down at him, big eyes filled with hope, and Harry doesn't need Zayn to speak up more than that to know what he's asking for.
"Dunno" He simple replies, because in all honesty he doesn't know. If he'll start a job after collage, if perhaps he's taking business classes instead, or maybe try again in the next tournament. "I'm just here now" He shrugs, "I can live with that" He feels the flutter of Zayn's lashes against his chest, "We can live with that" He says more softly and feels a kiss being placed on his chest. "We'll make it work ... We're making it work" He smiles, placing a lingering kiss on top of Zayn's head. "I love you"
Harry feels the flutter of Zayn's lashes again against his chest, eyes falling shut.
He doesn't hear a respond.
=====
Harry feels the material of the mattress under his body, the sunlight passing through the room but his eyelids are too heavy to adjust to such light so he keeps them closed, half of his face buried into the pillows, and he moves his arms around to find nothing next to him on the bed.
That until he feels fingers brushing his hair backwards, a kiss being planted on the back of his neck and he exhales happily, relaxing into the mattress again. He still feels so tired.
"Gonna get up anytime soon, champ?" Zayn whispers into his ear, feeling another kiss behind his ear, but he doesn't move yet, feeling the weight of his own body too heavy to do so. "I made you breakfast. You can sleep afterwards ... You need some food in your system first" Zayn whispers again into his ear, fingers still brushing through his hair, and Harry would love to turn to him, maybe kiss him, but again, he's too tired.
"Feels like my muscles are burning" Harry mumbles into the pillows, feeling Zayn shift next to him and the bed dipping with his each move. His eyes are still closed, but he knows Zayn is hovering over him, knees on each side of him, and he wouldn't mind actually if Zayn dropped his weight on top of him, but Zayn doesn't, and Harry feels Zayn's hands at his neck, trailing to his back, adding just the right pressure and hitting all the good spots that Harry literally moans as he relaxes further into the mattress. "Fuck. Didn't know you're capable of doing this"
Zayn smiles, hands reaching Harry's arms, massaging the muscles there too, "Yeah? I've been told I'm good at it" His hands trail next to Harry's spine, and Harry's upper body is relaxing, until Zayn's hands reach his lower back, probably teasing his ass as they go lower, massaging his thighs next, and maybe he's still feeling sleepy, but his lower region seems to awake as Zayn's hands go up again back to his hips and reaching his back, his lips trailing soft kisses from the back of his neck, following his hands as he goes lower on his back. "Would be able to do more if I had some oil. You'd feel much better. It's more effective that way"
Harry hums, another muffled deep moan erupting form his throat. "Could definitely use that oil for other purposes"
He hears Zayn laughing on top of him, hands decreasing their pressure until they completely stop, applying gentle strokes instead, lips back on the side of his neck, and Harry is enjoying every single second of it. "Alright, champ. Time to get up!" Zayn pulls back then he's off him, bed dipping to his side and Harry opens his eyes when Zayn's body blocks the sunlight, avoiding the sudden burn of it. Zayn's changed his clothes, another shirt with sweatpants. He must've taken a shower while Harry's asleep. He already misses those leggings on Zayn.
Harry stretches his arms, Zayn smiling at him as he sits up slowly, reaching forward for a soft kiss on his lips that Harry welcomes as his own hands go up to stroke Zayn's cheek before he's pulling back, getting up, and handing Harry his clothes.
He sees Louis on the couch, doing something on his phone, and he figures he needs to at least greet him when Zayn passes by him too, so he does, nodding at him and mumbling a 'morning' to which Louis responds to it, greeting him back, before he's being served by Zayn. He probably have eaten with Louis earlier, but Harry realizes his body does need food and doesn't object to whatever he's eating, and Zayn's cooking isn't bad either. He notices Louis slipping into his room as he finishes, Zayn taking his plate to the sink, so he stands up, wrapping his arms around his waist from behind and leaning in to plant a kiss on the side of his neck.
"Can I take you out?"
Zayn smiles, head turning to him, "Take me out? Where are we going?"
"Out" Harry simply replies, one hand reaching up to tilt Zayn's head upwards so he can kiss his lips.
Zayn stares at him for a moment, a smile still present on his lips as he nods slowly. "Alright. Let me change first"
Harry allows him to slip out of his arms, waiting on the couch for him as he notices that he's heading into Louis' room first. Probably to borrow an item of clothing, or to tell him he's going out.
Zayn finds Louis lying on the bed, phone in hand again as he lays next to him, glancing at his phone before his eyes turn to Louis. "What're your plans for today?"
Louis shrugs, "Staying here? I'm not sure we can handle more expenses"
"Actually, we can" Zayn whispers to him, a smile on his lips as Louis looks up from his phone and smile as well.
"See? You've never lost your charm, Zee"
Zayn shoves him lightly, "Shut up ... Anyway, Harry is taking me out, so just call me if you need anything, yeah?"
"I'm craving some Chinese food. Some good wine, and probably a huge chocolate cake" Louis grins and Zayn chuckles, leaning forward to kiss Louis' cheek before getting up and heading for his room instead to change his clothes.
=====
Harry maneuvers his way around the city like he knows which is where and it's much better than he and Louis ever did during their entire staying. He'd tell him the names of the places they're at, occasionally during their ride in a cab because he wanted to 'show him around' and Zayn doesn't protest, he enjoys Harry's company very much.
There are a few phone calls that Zayn doesn't really pay attention to, or doesn't understand half of the times. He guesses Harry is talking to one of his father's friends, too many numbers and places included that he isn't that interested to know about.
He takes him to lunch, ordering extra food for Louis, which was nice since he didn't ask him to, then drives him into a far district, and Zayn already knows what Harry is doing, what he was originally talking about on the phone this whole time as Harry leads him into an empty apartment, walking him around and asking about his opinion.
It's quite the right size for two, Zayn can see that the area is also giving that 'friendly' aura, a much nicer place that he'd been in, he knows it's expensive, but he bites his tongue. If Louis is tired and Harry is offering, he'll take it.
"So?" Harry whispers from behind him, arms locking around his waist and head resting on his shoulder as Zayn glances around, the windows are big, giving an amazing view from up here. "Do you like it?"
"It's nice" Zayn replies, turning in Harry's arms so he face him, "Thank you for doing this for us. I don't know how to repay you-"
"Your presence in my life is enough" Harry cuts him off softly, a smile stretched on his face as Zayn looks up at him from behind his lashes. "So? Are we buying it?"
Zayn looks down again, a good feeling in his chest combined with another itching one that he can't quite place. It's not even a rent apartment, and he doesn't know what to make out of it. Harry is taking in consideration their worst days, to provide them at least a permanent place to stay in until they can manage a job, and he's thankful, he's too thankful for every little thing Harry does for them, for every huge part he's participating in, and his hands rest on top of Harry's arms as he looks up at him, a small soft smile playing on his lips, stares for a moment into the pools of shining pure emeralds before he's moving his hands to rest on Harry's chest, eyes fixed on them instead.
"Fine. But this is all you're paying for" His eyes go up to meet Harry's again who just smiles at him, not giving him a reply, and Zayn has a feeling that he won't follow his words.
=====
Harry flies back home and he gets a call from him a couple of days later telling him that everything is settled and they're free to move in. Despite Zayn's protests, he finds a big sum of money on his bed when he wakes up the day Harry's flight is due, and Harry even called someone from his father's contacts to get them both decent jobs.
He wanted to show Louis the apartment first before they get to move anything to it or buying anything, and he doesn't even recognize the scene when he opens the door.
He strictly told Harry not to buy anything else, but the apartment is filled with everything from A to Z and he guesses that's why Harry needed those two days, hiring someone to take care of all of that, picking every necessity and placing it inside.
One room has a note on the door handle and Zayn picks it up, a white card with a 'close your eyes' written on it and he smiles despite the fact that he doesn't want any more surprises.
He opens the door slowly, eyes open just because, and he leans back on the wall, biting his bottom lip to suppress a grin, glossy eyes fixed on the bed, bunny plushies of every size, color, and shape surrounding it, and he feels himself a young kid again, when he saw a real rabbit and kept telling Louis he wants one. It's pretty childish to own something like that now, but the fact that Harry took time to select those stuffed animals, ordering them to be placed into his room, and still remembering his obsession over them makes his heart swells. But he knows himself, he likes it, and he'll probably die of cuteness overload if Harry placed a real rabbit on his bed instead.
There's a note on the bed, attached to the big white rabbit sitting on it, and Zayn picks it up, opening the card and smiles again. It's Harry's handwriting, and he doesn't know when did he exactly plan this, when everything is just going down in his life Harry decided to take care of him, and maybe fate doesn't hate him that much, maybe he gets to actually keep Harry, the one who's proving to him that his miserable life can actually have a light inside of it. A simple 'I love you' with kisses and heart drawn on the card makes a new feeling blossom inside his heart, not the kind of love he feels for Louis, not even the one he felt for Niall or anyone else. The feeling of wanting and being wanted by someone who's fighting his way to stay in his life.
It's something he doesn't want to ever lose.
=====
Even though he gets to call Harry, Zayn is devastated he can't see him or hold him 'physically' and he finds himself calling him on his day-off.
"Hey, love!" Harry's voice is bright, still not the real one passing through his ears but he'll take it. "Wouldn't expect you to actually call me at such hour"
Zayn glances at the clock. It's past noon, it's not an inappropriate time to call but Zayn remembers Harry's schedule and he knows he's got classes during that time, but Harry picked up right away, so he must've been free. He doesn't care either way, and he expresses his feelings this time in actual words. "Missed you"
"Yeah?" He can tell from Harry's voice that he's probably smiling.
"It's been three months, Harry, and you keep postponing your visit" He whines, "I want to see you in front of my eyes and hold you in my arms. I miss you too much you idiot and I want you here"
"I told you I can't, and I did offer a solution" Harry replies slowly and Zayn clicks his tongue. There's the possibility of a stable life with Harry, Louis doesn't have a love interest in someone here anymore, but they wouldn't want to go back, and it's a slap to his face to want two opposite things at the same time, so he keeps his mouth shut. "Anyway, I'm glad you called, I was actually going to call you. Can you do me a small favor?"
"Sure"
"So, you remember the one you met to get the job, yeah? He lives nearby and he just called and told me his leg got twisted. He's not that familiar with French either, so can you lend him a hand? I'll text you the address"
"Um ... Alright" Zayn furrows his brows in confusion.
"Great! Thanks! I'll talk to you later, gotta run!" Zayn hears the click of the line indicating that Harry just hung up on him and he stares at him phone in confusion. Well, Harry must've had a really important class to attend, or any other matter that he doesn't even get to hear him saying 'I love you' like he always does, and it's not like Zayn replies to it each time but ... It's nice to hear it from Harry nonetheless.
With a sigh, he gets up, texting Louis that he's out before grabbing his keys and heading out of the door.
=====
The house is decent, big with a gate and a garden, which is opened and Zayn furrows his brows, what kind of idiot leave it open like that? There's a car parked too, the garage is opened as well, and when he gets to the front door, it's opened, and he pauses for a second to recheck the address Harry sent him.
It's one of Harry's friends, he knows the guy, met the guy, so he's mainly confused but not scared as he pushes the door open and making sure he locks it behind him as he glances around the house to find it really nice. He wouldn't mind spending some time here.
"Connor?" He calls, "I'm Zayn! Harry's friend!" There's no answer and he sighs, deciding to go up the stairs to check if he's sprawled on the bathroom floor or something. Hopefully no more damage is done, when he feels hands covering his eyes and he stills. A familiar scent and too familiar hands and Zayn spins right away, eyes going wide and lips parted. "What ..."
"I'm sorry. I lied, there was no friend. This is actually mine" Harry smiles at him, spreading his arms to point around him and maybe expecting Zayn in his arms as well who appears more confused than ever, standing still and staring at him, and comparing to their conversation earlier, he actually thought Zayn would immediately hug him.
"But ... What?" Zayn repeats, still confused, and Harry sighs, dropping his arms to his side again.
"I bought this house. I was getting some papers done at home and that's why I couldn't visit earlier, but it's done now. I'm officially moving in. Earned a transfer permission to enter a college here and continue my last year. I also applied for a French course since I'm staying, and ... yeah, that's pretty much it"
"You ... moved in?" Zayn asks slowly and Harry sighs again.
"Yes, Zayn. I moved in" He steps closer, "I realized that being away from you only causes me more distraction and I'm feeling empty and lonely without you by my side, so I thought about it, if we're getting this to work then I'm putting my share of sacrifices ... I love you too much to stay away for a long time and distance"
"You're ... doing this for me?" Zayn asks again, voice quiet and slow, still in his confusion trance.
"Yes, Zayn. I'm doing this for you, for us"
Zayn blinks, taking a breath, and the smile Harry sees in his eyes first before it stretches on his lips makes every second he spent in preparing for this worth it, and a smile appears on his own face before Zayn is launching forward, arms locked around his neck tightly and Harry wraps his arms around his waist, feeling his body against his after three long moths of waiting.
And well, Zayn doesn't think he's ever felt this feeling before. For Harry to still drop everything for him, for the amount of love he never thought he can actually give to someone. He isn't even sure if he's giving the right amount back because it feels like Harry's feelings are too overwhelming for him to contain. And just like before, he expresses his feelings in words.
"This means a lot to me" His tears escape, but no one ever went to such extent for him other than Louis, and Louis' words spin in his mind for calling Harry a member in their little circle, a member of their family, someone he wants to hold on forever. "You mean a lot to me" His voice is quiet and Harry hears the small break in it from almost crying as he pulls back slightly to cup Harry's face in his hands. "Thank you for being in my life"
Harry wasn't really expecting Zayn to say this, and it's probably better than the three words he wanted to hear, because he knows Zayn, knows he cares, knows his feelings for him, but although Zayn is flipping his life upside down, he's also the one still holding his sanity, the one holding his heart, and he doesn't regret the many downturns they took in this relationship to work. He wouldn't have asked for a perfect relationship, and despite all of Zayn's flaws, he's still the perfect match for him.
So he tilts his head, capturing Zayn's lips in his own in a slow passionate kiss and feeling Zayn's body relaxing into his as he whispers back.
"And you're all that I ask for"