So I met this guy... it all happened randomly and by chance.
I met him at a party and I think the only reason I spoke to him was because I was absolutely drunk. But I did. I turned to him, looked at him for a bit and said "hey have we met before?"
And that was that.
Now we're dating and I honestly just feel so lucky. He's one of the nicest guys I've met all year and he genuinely wants to be with me and know everything about me. It almost scares me how much he likes me. One of his favorite sayings is "I'm crazy about you, do you know that?" And every time my heart races at the idea of someone being crazy about me. Right here, right now.
He's older, a sophomore turning 21 at the end of February, and so I'm really excited at the idea of him being able to buy alcohol for me ((even though he already does))
He pays for absolutely everything and it makes me cry a little every time. We've been on like 11 dates already and he never fails to amaze me.
He's met almost my whole family and I have met his. My mom and grandparents really like him and that makes life so much easier.
He's honestly so wonderful and I truly don't understand how I got so lucky...
So that makes me anxious... I can tell he really cares cause he's always saying that he's never leaving, he's not going anywhere, I'm stuck with him, etc and he's always wanting me to talk about myself cause he wants to know literally everything about me, and yet I'm still hesitant about telling him everything. I want to be able to tell him about my fits of depression and self harm. I want to tell him about the self conscious insecurities that I've fought with for years. I want to tell him about my darkest moments.
But I just can't yet, and I don't know why that scares me.