I'M BACK! And if you read my announcement in my latest update, I've been nominated for The Fanfiction Awards 2017! You can nominate your favourite books until January 29th! "Crush Him" goes under 'Best Niall Horan Fanfic' so if you want to nominate it you can go to and go to their latest book and read the rules and do an inline comment :)
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Previously in chapter 17:
"Maybe... you can take Maddie's place tonight? I'm sure she's fine with sleeping in the single bed."
"Sure, I'll sleep next to you as long as we agree that this doesn't mean anything. I'm not interested in any drama."
"Of course not. I would never sleep with you."
"Ouch."
"Not like that." She giggled, slapping me on the arm. "Because you're my best friend's ex. It would be wrong. But a meaningless kiss is fine, I hope."
"She has Marcus, so she has no right to get jealous anyway." I shrugged.
"But maybe we should keep this a secret, just in case."
"Let's keep it a secret."
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I woke up the next day when someone named Jake Foster smashed a pillow in my head. A groan escaped my mouth and it took me a few seconds to adjust to the light.
"Move your ass, we'll be late for breakfast." He said, glancing next to me before leaving the room along with Maddie.
I turned to my side, seeing Katelyn waking up next to me.
"My head hurts." She mumbled.
"Yeah, well at least you didn't get a pillow in your head just now." I told her as I sat up in the bed.
We got dressed, barely speaking to each other and left the room quietly. The short lift ride down to the restaurant was just as quiet. And it bothered me because all we did last night was kiss and sleep in the same bed. Why things were so awkward between us was a mystery to me.
Olivia was the first one I saw when we stepped into the breakfast restaurant. She was sitting by one of the tables with her head in her hands. I could hear her talking but I couldn't understand what she was saying. Marcus sat next to her, stroking her back while talking to Alex. From my judgement Olivia wasn't talking to her boyfriend, but talking to Casper.
"I really don't feel like eating." Katelyn mumbled next to me, as we made our way towards the tables.
"Then don't." I coldly answered and pulled out the chair next to Vicky.
"What are the plans for today?" Zara asked, trying to get everyone's attention.
"I wanna visit the Louvre Museum." Chloe said.
"And I wanna see the inside of the Eiffel Tower. We only saw the outside the other day." Jake said, sitting down next to me with some breakfast.
"Paris changed you, man. You usually settles for the outside and doesn't care about the inside." I said, trying to be funny.
At least some of them laughed.
"I wanna do some more shopping and try out different restaurants." Vicky said.
"Okay, sounds like we have some choices to make." Zara said, sighing.
"Or we split up in groups, so people can decide for themselves were they wanna go." Marcus suggested. "As long as at least one in the group brings a map. I don't want to wake up tomorrow morning and find out someone is missing."
"Good thinking." Zara agreed. "It's either the Eifel Tower, a museum or shopping."
"Aren't you going to eat?" Jake asked me when everyone started talking about where the wanted to go.
"Not really hungry."
Jake raised his eyebrows.
"That's odd. Maybe Paris changed you instead."
I rolled my eyes.
"So, where do you wanna go?" He continued.
"Well, let's see. Museums are boring, shopping is boring, and towers are boring. Looks like I'm staying at the hotel today."
Despite the rumble around the tables, I could hear Olivia's voice through it all. She wasn't speaking loud, just talking to Marcus. But I reacted to her voice like a fire alarm.
"I wanna visit the tower again." She told him.
"But if I have to choose I guess the Eiffel Tower will do." I said, looking back to Jake.
About two hours later we were in the park by the Eiffel Tower. It was Olivia, Casper, Jake, Zara and I. I was actually surprised that Marcus chose to go to the museum instead of going with his girlfriend. But hey, I'm not complaining.
The girls started taking photos of the place, before we eventually decided to get in line to go up in the tower. Olivia was standing next to me, turning a map upside down and back, over and over again.
"Don't you know how to read maps?" I asked her.
"Don't you know how to shut up?"
"Hey, I've been quiet all morning." I defended myself.
"Yeah, I noticed." She said without looking up. "You seemed very off at the breakfast."
"So did you."
She glanced up for a second before continuing trying to find the right spot on the map. Eventually it got irritating so I snatched it out of her hands and held it the right way.
"There's the tower. The hotel is over here." I pointed out.
"I wasn't looking for the tower or the hotel. I was looking for Place Dauphine."
"And that is?" I asked, confused.
"A square. Apparently it's one of the most beautiful squares in Paris."
I rolled my eyes and looked away, seeing the line move a little forward. After a while I saw in the corner of my eye how Olivia folded the map and put it in her bag.
"Quitter." I teased, causing her to nudge her elbow into my arm.
After what felt like forever, we were finally walking up the stairs to the first platform of the tower. Casper was complaining about how tired he was, and Zara and Olivia were like two kids on Christmas because of the view.
I walked over to the edge where Jake was standing, taking pictures.
"It's quite nice up here, don't you think?" He said once I was standing next to him.
"Yeah. I'm actually glad we decided to join them."
"To the tower or this whole trip?"
"The whole trip." I nodded.
"Of course you are." He chuckled.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
He raised an eyebrow and looked at me. Then he placed his hands on my shoulders to turn me around.
Zara, Olivia and Casper were standing a bit further away. Olivia's happiness was taking over and she took selfies with her friends, smiling like never before. I felt my lips form a smile as I watched her.
Jake turned me back to him.
"When Zara mentioned there were two available spots on the trip, I immediately thought of you. I've never understood the point of Paris, probably because I've never been here before, but I saw this as an opportunity for you to win her back."
"Jake..." I sighed, trying to avoid the topic he was bringing up.
"I did this for you. Frankly I don't give a shit about visiting museums or eating French food. All I know is that this is the most romantic city in the world and you're here with Olivia. The girl you never really truly got over, am I right?"
"I'm not discussing this with you again." I said, looking away.
"Okay, then I'll just rant by myself because I know you'll listen either way."
I rolled my eyes, looking away.
"After two years of not seeing her, she just magically appeared one night at your job. And even though she has a boyfriend that she seems to actually care about, she is still trying to make room for you in her life ever since that cold December night. I'm not saying she has feelings for you, but at least she's trying to make you stay this time."
I glanced over to her again, seeing her laughing with her two closest friends.
"And I know you're too proud to admit it, but you're trying to stay too. There must be a reason that you wanted to come with us to Paris. I didn't force you or anything. It was your decision to crash her early honeymoon with Marcus." Jake continued.
"When will you ever shut up?" I muttered.
"You're also a dumb piece of shit that doesn't believe in destiny."
I frowned and looked at him.
"I mean out of all pubs in London, and let's face it; London is big, she came to the pub you were working at. Mate, it wasn't a coincidence."
"So you think we had a little reunion thanks to destiny." I stated, snorting with a laugh. "And you're calling me dumb."
He patted me on the shoulder.
"Laugh all you want, but both of us know it's true."
He walked over to Zara, and I saw Olivia making her way towards me.
"Let's take a picture together." She said, smiling.
And who am I to say no to that smile?
We took a few pictures, and she even asked me to crouch down so we'd be more the same height. Then she turned around and leaned on the railing.
"This is beautiful. I mean I might be afraid of heights but this is worth facing my fears." She sighed, looking out on the city in front of us.
"I didn't know you were afraid of heights." I frowned.
"You didn't?" She asked and looked at me for a second. "Well, you learn something new every day."
"I thought your biggest fear was spiders, considering that's basically how we met the first time."
I saw her rolling her eyes, but still with a smile on her lips.
"We met in school, Niall. Our first real conversation just happened to be about spiders. But my biggest fear is neither spiders or heights."
"Then what is it?" I asked and also leaned against the railing.
"Death. And I know it sound stupid since three years ago I wished for it. But back then I never really thought about the consequences. When someone dies, it hurts so many people. Like, losing someone is the most painful thing there is. And I'm not talking about losing someone in a breakup, because then you can still see the person. But if someone dies, they're gone and no matter what, they're not coming back. So my biggest fear is actually to die. I'd be missing out on so much and people would be in pain because of it."
"I'm glad you finally understand the meaning of death, because there's nothing beautiful about it."
"Funerals can be quite beautiful though. Sad, but beautiful."
"I thought of you that way every day for five months." I blurt out.
And I still do
She looked at me.
"Do you know the reason why I always asked you to stop smoking?" She asked instead of actually responding to what I just said.
I shook my head.
"Because even though I wanted to die myself, I would never ask for that to happen to anyone, not even my worst enemy. Smoking would eventually kill you, so I just wanted to slow down the process."
I wanna kiss you right now
"I was only seventeen back then, I didn't know better. So if you would have asked me that today, I would probably have stopped right there on the spot."
"Then I'm asking you right now. Can you stop smoking?"
"Nope. We're not together anymore, so I'm not as obsessed with you as I was back then." I said with a grin. She grinned back and stepped closer. She wrapped her hands around my arm and leaned against my shoulder.
"I've missed this."
"What?" I asked, feeling my heart beating faster because of how close she was.
"Being with you."
I couldn't help but smile.
"So you don't wish Marcus would be here with you instead?"
"Don't ruin the moment, Niall." She laughed.
"That's what I do. I'm a moment-ruiner."
"If you just kept your mouth shut, you wouldn't be."
I bit my lip, thinking about last night. Even though Katelyn and I decided to not tell Olivia, I wanted to. If I ever want her to love me again, I have to be honest about everything. Trust is the key to every successful relationship.
"There's something I need to tell you."
"Oh?" She said, lifting up her head from my shoulder to look at me.
Just then, Jake came over and told us they were heading up to the second platform. Olivia's big smile was back and she joined Jake and the others up the stairs. I sighed to myself before following them as well.
Hours later we were on our way back to the hotel. I had my hands deep in my pockets, feeling the secret eating my alive from the inside. Olivia had probably forgotten about it already, but I was desperate to tell her that I kissed one of her closest friends last night. It was a meaningless kiss, but I still felt the urge to let her know. It shouldn't matter to either of us, but still. She deserves to know, whether she cares or not.
"Hey, Liv?"
She didn't look at me at first. She was too busy laughing at one of Jake's lame jokes. Then she looked back at me.
"Oh, you were talking to me? I don't think I've ever heard you calling me Liv before."
"Well, it is your nickname, isn't it?"
"That's just something the girls call me from time to time. I wouldn't call it my nickname, but whatever. What's up?"
I slowed down a little, so we would be walking behind the others.
"About earlier."
"Oh right, you wanted to tell me something!" She said with a smile, walking next to me.
"It's not really a big deal, but I just wanted to tell you because it's been bothering me for a few hours now."
"Let's have it then."
"Last night, at the pub... Remember I took Katelyn outside because she was drunk?"
"I don't recall... I was a bit drunk myself." She giggled. "But continue."
"Well, we kissed."
A small frown appeared on her face, but she didn't seem to be as bothered by it as me.
"And we didn't want to tell you, but it didn't mean anything to either Kat or me. So that's why it's not a big deal, but at the same time it feels weird because she's your friend and you're my ex and–"
"Niall." She interrupted. "You're right, it's not a big deal. You kissed, so what? You don't have to tell me every time you kiss someone, whether it's my friend or not. Especially if you were to kiss Mackenzie Williams, then you should definitely not tell me." She said, smirking a little.
"So you're not angry?"
"Why would I be?"
I smiled, relieved.
We got closer to the hotel and I saw Marcus waiting outside, alongside Katelyn. What a coincidence. Olivia greeted them both, kissed Marcus before entering the hotel.
"How was the shopping?" I asked Katelyn as we followed the rest towards the lifts.
"I wouldn't know, since I went to the museum. How was the tower?"
"Still standing there on its usual spot."
She laughed a little.
"Oh, and I told Olivia." I mumbled and she froze in her actions.
She turned back to me, letting the others step into the lift. I glanced at them as the doors closed, and as soon as we were alone, Katelyn smacked me across the head.
"Ouch! What did you do that for?"
"For telling my best friend I kissed her ex! Are you really that stupid? She's gonna freak!"
"She took it extremely well, alright?" I said.
"But if she starts yelling at me, I know where you live." She warned me, pressing the button to the lift.
"Obviously, since we stay in the same hotel room." I told her, rolling my eyes.
She glared at me.
"It's a miracle you graduated, because you're not that bright."
I shook my head and ignored her for the short trip up to our floor. To my surprise Olivia waited outside our room.
"Olivia, hi." Katelyn said, sounding a bit nervous.
"The boys are watching some basketball game in my room, if you wanna join them." She responded, looking directly at me.
"And you wanna hide out in my room? Understandable." Katelyn giggled and used her card to unlock the door to our room.
"Where's Maddie? And Jake?" I asked.
"Maddie is in Zara's room and Jake is watching the game. Where else would he be?" Olivia laughed and followed Katelyn into our room.
They closed the door behind them, and I headed to the other room to catch up with the game.
"Niall! Before you come inside, could you be a dear and go get my charger? Everyone in here is already using theirs." Jake announced as soon as Lucas let me in.
"I'm not your fucking butler." I told him.
"I'll buy you a beer at the airport tomorrow." He tried.
I sighed.
"Fine."
I left the room again and just took a few steps before I was standing outside the door to our room. I pulled out my card and was about to unlock the door, when I heard Olivia and Katelyn talking on the other side.
"Olivia, look, it just happened. We were talking and he said some cute stuff and well, I just kissed him in the heat of the moment. Totally meaningless."
"I'm not angry or upset, Kat. It just feels weird."
"I know I shouldn't have kissed him, but I guess I felt lonely."
"I'm not blaming you." Olivia calmly said. "But why would you keep it a secret if it didn't mean anything? At least Niall was honest enough to want to tell me."
"Because I knew you would freak out! It's wrong and way out of line to kiss your friend's ex, I know that, but you have to understand that it wasn't like that."
"Why would I freak out? I love Marcus and you–"
"Why do you keep saying that?" Katelyn interrupted, and I frowned as I stepped closer to the door. "Who are you trying to convince? He's your boyfriend, of course you love him, but you keep reminding people about it all the time. Like you're trying to prove something."
Olivia stayed quiet for a moment.
"I'm not trying to convince or prove anything. I just–"
"Hey, what's taking you so long?"
I was startled by Jake's voice and immediately backed away from the door.
"Don't you have the card key?" He continued and pulled out his own as he made his way towards me.
"Olivia and Katelyn are talking inside." I told him.
"So? I'm just gonna grab my phone charger."
He unlocked the door and the girls became quiet right away.
"Ladies." Jake greeted and started to look for his charger.
Katelyn stopped me when Jake and I were about to leave the room. Jake left, closing the door on his way out and I turned to Olivia and Katelyn.
"You told me she took it extremely well?" Kat said, more of a question than a statement, staring at me.
"What?"
"I'm fine. This isn't even about him anymore." Olivia muttered.
"Good, because I don't want to get involved."
"See, Niall, this is the reason we shouldn't have told her." Katelyn muttered and sat down on the bed.
"I thought we were past that whole keeping stuff from each other. Or is this some kind of payback to me because I lied to you in high school?" Olivia fought back.
"We are past that. But this little white lie is not even comparable to your lie."
"Okay, girls, calm down." I cut in, making them both look at me. "She's right, Katelyn. We shouldn't even have kept it a secret in the beginning because we both agreed it didn't mean anything. But Olivia, you shouldn't even care since you're with Marcus."
"I don't. It's just the whole situation. Honestly I don't give a shit that you two kissed, it's not like you're going to get married because of it. What bothers me is that you both chose to keep it from me."
Katelyn and I looked at each other. Then I sighed.
"In the risk of sounding like a jerk... Olivia, you're overreacting. We only kept it from you for a few hours. It happened last night, we were both drunk and nothing more happened, just a kiss. None of us cheated, no one died. Let's just forget it ever happened."
Olivia crossed her arms, sighing.
"I guess you're right. Maybe I am overreacting."
"I'm sorry, Liv." Katelyn said, standing up from the bed again.
"There you go." I said, smiling as they hugged. "Now let's kiss and make up."
They glared at me.
"Oh, right. Wrong saying at the wrong situation."
Katelyn laughed and they let go of each other.
"Like I said, you're not that bright, Niall."
"So, I can go watch the game now?"
"Yes, you can go watch the game." Olivia said.
I walked over to the door again. As I opened it, I looked back. Olivia caught my eye and smiled. I winked at her before leaving.
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