Chresanto's P.O.V.
"They want me".
I stared at Rayan, as did Elijah and Jacob, we were in the cafeteria eating lunch. Jacob was sitting with us as per Ray's request. We hadn't spoken to one another, but he did speak to Elijah. I wasn't stupid, I wasn't expecting things to go back to normal after we talked, but at least we could be around one another without throwing punches.
"Who?" I asked, taking it upon myself to speak first.
"Two of the schools that came to the art show want me, they really liked my work and they think I'd be a perfect addition to their art departments".
"Really?" Jacob suddenly spoke up, "which two schools?"
"Columbia and Princeton".
"Seriously? Ray, that's great" I stated, really feeling happy for him. This was all he ever wanted, he wanted to go to a college that was going to help further his career in art, and now he had the opportunity. "How are you going to choose between the schools?"
"I have no idea, Columbia and Princeton are both Ivy Leagues, and they both cost a shit ton of money. I don't have that money, my family can't afford to send me off to either of those colleges without help. I've got to look into financial aid, grants, loans, scholarships... Anything that's going to help me get there, but even then I don't know how much any of those things will help. I kind of want to go to Princeton because it's closer to New York, I did some research and Princeton, New Jersey, is only an hour and some minutes away from New York City".
"Don't worry"Jacob reassured, "I'm sure if both colleges really like you, which it seems like they do, they'll figure out how to get you in one of their dorms. Scholarships is the way to go, or grants, you can't beat free money".
I stared at Jacob because that's the most I've heard him speak in one go in a while, I knew I should look away from him, but I couldn't. He still looked different than he usually did, he looked tired and like he was trying to curl in on himself and just hide away. I was taken out of my stupor when Jacob spoke again, but he wasn't speaking to me.
"Elijah, are you okay?"
Glancing at Elijah, I could tell that he wasn't, but he was trying really hard to keep himself together. Ray turned to look at Elijah and frowned, noticing the way Elijah was pretty much avoiding eye contact with everyone at the table.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm alright" Elijah said, answering both Ray and Jacob's questions. "I'm just really proud of you, Ray, and, um... Yeah, just really proud and happy".
Elijah was a shit liar, he'd always been, and he still was, because it was obvious he was trying really hard not to just burst into tears. He stood up from the table, murmuring that he had to go, and walked off before anyone could say anything to him.
"Why the fuck can't we just have one normal lunch?" I asked, growing frustrated. I stood up from the table too, as did Ray and Jacob, and we walked out of the cafeteria, our food long forgotten. Elijah was standing in the hallway, wiping at his eyes and sniffling. "What's the matter with you?" I asked roughly, which I really didn't mean for it to come out that way, but I was just confused and a bit angered that Elijah just walked off so fast.
"I said I was alright".
"Obviously you're not alright".
"I don't want to tell you, Chresanto" he murmured, glancing at Rayan. "Not with Ray here".
I stared at Elijah for a really long time before slowly nodding my head, I think I got it.
"Does it have to do with... You know, the thing we talked about that one time when I came over to help Ray choose his art pieces?"
Elijah hesitated for a second before nodding a little, "mhm".
"What?" Ray suddenly asked, he looked both confused and worried, and a little hurt too. Him and Elijah were close, and it wasn't very often where one of them didn't want the other around. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No" Elijah sighed.
Ray didn't understand, and he wasn't going to, I was the only one who knew and as much as Elijah got on my nerves, I was going to have to talk to him about it.
"Could you guys give us a second?" I asked, motioning for Jacob and Ray to walk away, it was obvious Ray didn't want to, but he did walk back into the cafeteria with Jacob. When I was sure the two of them were gone, I turned around and looked at Elijah. "What's the matter with you?"
"I'm really scared for him" Elijah confessed, "I mean, I'm proud, don't get me wrong. I'm really, really proud of Rayan, but I'm scared that whichever school he chooses to attend, he's not going to be okay there. He's not okay now, and I can't... I can't go with him to Princeton or Columbia, he's going to be there alone. I love him a lot and I'm always with him, I told you before that I'm the person he needs to keep himself from falling into a panic attack or helping him with his insomnia.
"I'm scared that he's not going to be okay without me, plus I love him to death and I don't want him forgetting about me when he's up there doing the thing he loves the most. I have nothing going for me, I'm not even going to college, yet he's over here choosing between two Ivy Leagues. I'm shit compared to Ray and I'm scared that one day he's going to realize it and want nothing to do with me anymore".
"Did you forget who you're talking about?" I asked while rolling my eyes, "Ray is the kindest person we both know, you know just as much as I do that he's not going to forget about you or think you're beneath him. I guess I can see why you're scared when it comes to his health, I didn't even think about it until you said something. Maybe you should talk to him about it, he obviously knows something is going on with you and it has to do with him, he's going to ask questions and he's going to want answers".
"I don't want to take away from his great moment though, I can just distance myself from him or something, I don't know..."
"Don't do that, don't put an unnecessary strain on your friendship because you're too afraid to talk to him about shit. Ray's going to hear you out, you know that, stop working yourself up over nothing".
"Okay" he replied warily.
"Let's go back to the table now, I'm hungry" I frowned, walking back into the cafeteria, Elijah following behind me.
Jacob and Ray were talking with each other but stopped when we sat down at the table, I proceeded to finish eating my food as Elijah returned to his seat beside Ray, who looked at him with concern.
"Are you mad at me?" Ray asked, beginning to pull on a few strands of his hair, "did I do something wrong?"
"No" Elijah answered, gently pulling Ray's hand away from his hair. "I'm not mad at you and you didn't do anything wrong. We'll talk about it when we get home".
"Are we okay?"
"We're okay".
I glanced at Jacob, wondering if I could ask him the same thing, he must've known what I was thinking because he quirked an eyebrow as if to dare me to speak. He shook his head a little and looked away from me.
"What're you guys doing after school?" Elijah asked, trying to change the atmosphere a bit.
"Well I have to go to my first anger management class today" I said, pretending like I was thrilled, which I really wasn't because it was a load of bullshit that I had to go to a class on how to manage my anger problem that I supposedly had.
"So that means you're not getting put into a foster home?"
"Right, Social Services just wants me out of their hair to be honest" I stated, "I guess forcing me to sit down and talk about my anger is the best way for them to keep me at bay or something".
"I think a lot could come out of it" Elijah replied, both Jacob and Ray seemed to agree because they nodded their heads.
"So I'm the only one here who thinks I don't have an anger problem".
"The first step is acknowledging and accepting that one has a problem" Ray spoke up, "and you, my friend, are not there yet".
"Shut up" I rolled my eyes and finished eating my food, as did everyone else. When the bell rang, signaling that we had to get to our next classes, Ray and Elijah walked off together like they always did and Jacob lingered around in the hallway for a bit. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah... Just waiting".
"For what?"
"Winston usually walks me to my next class, so..." Jacob looked passed me and I turned my head, frowning when I noticed Winston making his way over. I didn't say anything when he stood in front of me, and I didn't say anything when he hugged Jacob either. Winston was smart enough not to speak to me, I didn't like him, and he knew that.
"Are you ready to go?" He asked Jacob, "I don't want you to be late".
"Yeah, I'm ready" Jacob answered, beginning to walk off with Winston. I didn't think he was going to spare me another glance, but he did. "Bye".
I gave a fleeting wave and bit my tongue so I wouldn't speak and say something that would make things worse, especially when Winston laced his fingers between Jacob's. Shit was already different between Jacob and I, I was lucky enough to get him to look and speak to me, even if it were only for a few seconds and only a few words. I didn't want to ruin things more than they already were.
After school, I drove myself to my anger management class and waited in the lobby of the building where it was being held. There were other people waiting too, but I wasn't sure if they were there for the same thing as me until a woman with a name tag lead us all to a room with a set of chairs in the middle of the floor.
"I'm Dr. Reynolds, and welcome to anger management class" the women, who was apparently a doctor and the class instructor, introduced herself as she found a chair to sit in. She motioned for everyone to find a place to sit, and we all did, even myself. The usual happened like in any type of group therapy session, everyone introduced themselves and gave a little information about who they were and why they were here.
Being in the class was a waste of my time, but I know that I had a lot more to go to, so I was going to try and stick things through. I didn't learn anything the whole hour and a half I was sitting there, it was boring as hell, but Mia found it as the most interesting thing in the world when I got home.
"How did it go?" She asked curiously, watching me as I walked around the kitchen.
"How did what go?"
"You know what I'm talking about, Chres".
"Mia, the class was fine, it was boring, we didn't do anything except for talk about the things we do when we get angry, that's it. I had to listen to other people talk for more than an hour, the class is bullshit".
"You may think it is, but please take the class seriously, okay?" She pleaded, "if you don't, then you're getting put in a foster home. This is your last chance to stay here and not be forced to go live with someone you don't know. As much as we have our differences, I love you and I want you to stay underneath the same roof as me".
Nodding my head, I glanced at her, "I love you too, Mia".
She smiled a bit because I really didn't tell her that I loved her as much as I should, it's not very often where the words leave my mouth.
"I'm the youngest one there" I suddenly stated, "the second youngest person is twenty-five".
"That's not too bad, is it?"
"I guess not, it just felt awkward, everyone was saying how they were in their twenties and thirties, and then here I am, seventeen... And in anger management".
"There's nothing wrong with that, you know? You just grew up angry, you walk around carrying so much on your shoulders, and it's time for you to let things go and learn to cope with them. I'm sorry I didn't raise you better, I sho-" "You raised me just fine, Mia" I frowned, "I'm not angry because of you, I didn't grow up wrong, you raised me the best way you knew how while you were still growing up yourself. You don't give yourself enough credit, to be honest.
"You became my parent at eighteen while our biological parents were abusing me. You helped patch me up when I would come home from school all bloody and bruised because I would get pushed around. I don't know where I would be or what I would be like if you hadn't stepped up and said you would become my legal guardian, and really I appreciate that. We don't always see eye to eye on things, but I do love you and I thank you for everything you've done for me".
I looked up from what I was doing when Mia didn't immediately say anything, she stood up and looked me over with narrowed eyes.
"Who are you and what have you done with Chresanto?"
"Fuck off" I cursed, rolling my eyes before watching her walk up to me.
"Can I hug you?" She laughed.
"Please, don't" I said, trying to keep Mia away from me, but she dodged my hands and managed to wrap her arms around me, pulling me closer to her. "I feel very uncomfortable right now".
Mia ignored me and continued to hug me anyway, I huffed in slight annoyance, but wrapped my arms around her too, hugging her back. We stayed like that for a little while, then I was over it.
"Okay, that's enough. Get off of me".
(A/N: What are your thoughts on Elijah's concerns when it comes to Rayan? What about the little heart to heart between Chresanto and Mia. Also, do you think Chresanto will take his anger management classes seriously?)