Sabastienne
My phone rang as I was heading into the doctor's office.
"You're coming home," my father ordered, "no arguing. We need you here."
"Hi, it's great to hear from you, I'm good thanks for asking."
"You have two days." He hung up. I jammed my phone back into the front pocket of my jeans and sighed. My time to be a carefree young adult was finally up; I had to get back to business. My entire life I'd been ready for this but now that it was upon me I didn't want this chapter to be over, and that was all because of Robyn. Because of the friends I'd made here too but mostly her. I couldn't imagine saying goodbye ... it would break my heart. But there was no alternative.
I strode into the building. Chose the stairs over the elevator because they'd help me regain control over my emotions. It was only four floors up, I wasn't even out of breath when I reached the office.
Within I wasn't kept waiting. The doctor rushed out as I entered, face flushed, clearly agitated.
"Oh, Miss Sloan! Hold on, let me just find the... Here it is!" He read quickly from one of a substantial stack of paper, "Condition greatly improved, nothing more we can do for you, go home, spend some time with your family." He glanced up and smiled a little sheepishly, "Sorry, I have another patient waiting. Emergency call this morning, completely backed up. Congratulations!"
"What? How? Sir, wait!" But he was gone again, a stray sheet floating gently to the floor.
I blinked, unsure what to do.
"Excuse me," I tapped the receptionist's desk. "Could I have another appointment? I'd like to go over some of the details of my recovery."
The young woman tapped something on her computer, "Name please." I gave it. "He's free next Wednesday at ten past two?"
"That works for me."
Then I left, pausing on the landing outside the doctor's office, allowing the news to sink in. An enormous weight lifted from my shoulders and I smiled stupidly at the stairs, feeling a hundred times lighter. Now Roby and I had an entire lifetime to be together and leaving didn't feel so difficult. I spun on the spot and rushed to the elevator.
Back at school, Robyn was still sleeping.
"Wakey wakey," I drew the blankets down from around her head. She squirmed and buried her face half in the pillow. I tucked strands of dishevelled hair behind one ear and kissed the newly exposed cheekbone. "Come on, baby." She grappled for the covers, trying to go back to sleep. I threw them across the room. "We've got things to do today, Robbie, you gotta get up."
"Ugh," she slowly sat up. "What is more important than sleep?"
"Me?" I grinned.
She hopped out of bed, saying, "Maybe," and kissing me on the cheek as she headed for the door. I sat on her bed, basking in my newfound buoyancy - was this what they called joy? For the first time in my life, I was realising I wanted to live; that even before I'd met Robyn, I hadn't wanted to die. I'd always thought I wouldn't mind because I'd had no other option, because it was easier to believe that, but now... I laughed aloud. The whole world had opened back up to me and it felt incredible.
When Robyn returned from the bathroom, I spun her, planted a kiss in freshly washed hair and dipped her, ballroom dancing style. She grinned.
"Come on, we're going somewhere awesome!"
We rode for several hours, only stopping once for breakfast.
Climbing off the bike when we finally arrived, Robyn stretched and whined, "I'm in fucking pain," her body released a series of cracks and pops. "Where the heck are we anyway?"
"The beach," I pulled off my helmet and quickly sorted my hair. "C'mon."
She hung back, "I don't like beaches."
"What!?" I gasped, "They're amazing!"
"I don't like sand, it's gritty, annoying and gets everywhere, plus the sun's way too warm and it hurts my eyes and, oh my, we haven't even reached body insecurities yet! Altogether, it's just too much."
"You're offending me!"
She jumped over and wrapped me in her arms, "You're allowed to like the beach cos they don't have any in Russia, but me? I'm fed up of them."
Don't have beaches in Russia? Was this girl completely failed by the education system!?
"I'm sorry, I forgot there are thousands in Scotland," I teased, kissing the top of her head.
"Yeah, there are. They're a big mingin' and freezing mostly but they're still beaches."
"Ming in?"
She laughed, "It sounds so wrong when you say it. Mingin' means, like, disgusting."
"If they're cold and dirty then they're not real beaches. I discount your Scottish forgeries; I love the beach!"
"I've been getting that vibe."
"I'll buy you ice cream if you spend this one night on the beach with me."
"The whole night?" She gasped, "It better be a lot of ice cream!" I batted my eyelashes and she couldn't help grinning and saying, "Oh, all right then, don't damage yourself."
We walked through a final line of buildings and were ejected onto the sand. It wasn't late so there were only a hundred or so fellow beach goers. Everyone else was still at work or school, but I didn't feel bad: that just meant all the more beach for us!
"I can't see anywhere to get ice cream," said Robyn sulkily. "This sucks."
I pushed her into the sand, "You're going to become boring if you're not careful!"
"OUCH!" I kept her down with my foot. "There's sand in my mouth! Oh my god," she screamed, "it tastes like butt!"
"And how would you know what butt tastes like?" I allowed her to rise.
She wiped her face, "That's right, pretend you don't know."
"Let's go swimming!" I ran down the beach.
She chased, shouting, "Come on, Sabby, tell the people how much you love ass-play!" Several elderlies gave us odd looks as we raced into the sea.
Fuck it was cold!
I splashed water at Robyn and she screamed, tripped on something, fell face-first into the water.
"Baby," I ran over and pulled her out of the water, laughing, "are you okay!?" She was drenched.
"There're some dark forces at work. That was definitely a hand under there, dragging me down."
"Really?" I withdrew, eyeing the surface nervously.
"Mhm," she started wringing the water out of her hair in a thick stream. "It was cold and scaly," she shuddered, "and then I could hear whispering: we've been waiting for you. We want to sacrifice you to our ocean devil!" I ran into shallower water. "And then this thing appeared and was all like ARRGGH!!" She leapt through the air at me and we both fell backwards, her laughing wildly.
"I'm going to cry," I said, shoving her off and getting back up. My jeans and shirt were soaked, clinging to my body, but I was nowhere near as bad as Robbie.
She giggled, "I'm sorry, baby, I forgot you were so easily scared."
"I'm cautious, not scared!"
"Sure, that's what it is!" She stuck her tongue out and I swatted her playfully around the head. She kissed me quickly in retaliation, her lips salted from the ocean. "I love you."
"I know," I cradled her head in my hands and kissed her again, more deeply. She melted into me, sighing against my lips. Her fingers hooked into the belt loops of my jeans and she pulled me closer, hips bumping together. I pressed little kisses into the corners of her mouth and smiled down at her upturned face. She blushed and hid in my neck.
"There are people watching us."
"We're hot, let them watch."
"Tell them to go away," she said, "I want you all to myself."
"Now that's a little greedy," I teased, "I'm too much awesome for just one person."
"We're two, between us I'm sure we can manage," she said, adding in a whisper, "with something to prop up your gigantic head."
"Hey!" I poked her in the side, "My head is of perfectly reasonable dimensions."
"Dimensions! Like a house!" she yelled triumphantly.
"My head is not like a house."
"Yes it is!"
I grabbed her around the waist and lifted her into the air, "Say my head is not like a house!"
"Never!"
I lowered her close to the water, "Say it!"
"NO!" She screamed, trying to get free, splashing herself endlessly in the process. I dropped her in. Once she had recovered, she tried to run at me but I was too quick, snatching her up and kissing all over her face. "Stop!" she laughed, scrunching up her nose and trying to turn her face away.
"Not until you say it!"
"I won't!"
"Say it!"
"No!"
"Say it or I'll drop you again!"
"Your head isn't like a house."
"Thank you," I smirked, putting her down, "I know."
"IT'S LIKE A FUCKING MANSION!" And she ran away laughing like a crazy person.
I shook my head, "You ass!"
***
Later that night we swayed together beside a campfire, her back pressed against my front, my arms around her.
"But she thought I meant Rumplestiltskin and that you were descended from small, angry baby-stealers!" Robyn giggled uncontrollably. She'd joined in with our drinking, saying she was bored and now, very inebriated, was rambling about Rasputin and other mostly inaccurate fragments of Russian history. "I think I could be Russian too," she was saying, "cos I'm a busy, busy gall. Always ... rushin' about the place!!" She laughed so hard she nearly fell over.
"Okay, baby girl, let's get you some water," I said, keeping her upright.
"Fiirst," she hugged me, "let me just hold you and remember that you're here."
"You forgot?"
"No, but sometimes I get overwhelmed and I'm suddenly thinking 'Wow I got this amazing beautiful perfect human right here who loves me even when I suck and who I love with all my freaking heart' and then my chest goes all tight like I might explode from so much happiness because you're mine." She went very still; we held each other tight, our hearts thumping together. "If I ever lose you it's because I didn't deserve you any longer," she whispered, so quietly I almost didn't hear her over the crackling fire and the voices of the group who'd built it. "It's because God, or whoever else there may be, knew I wasn't appreciating you enough."
"You don't need to appreciate me."
"Yes I do," she raised her head and gazed at me earnestly. Her eyes were shiny and wet. "You're the most incredible person I've ever met. I love you so much." The fire illuminated the tears as they spilled down her cheeks.
Everything inside me hurt. It was the worst thing in the world, seeing her cry and knowing I was the reason. Emotions weren't worth all this, I was only causing her pain. But I loved this little Scot too damn much to refuse her anything, even if it was for her own good.
"Don't," I said gruffly, "please don't cry."
"It's because I'm happy," she protested, trying to lift her mouth into a smile.
"I know you better than that."
She took a while to reply, "You're leaving."
"Yes, I must return to Russia."
"I thought we had until summer. I'm not ready." She ducked her head down.
I gently lifted it back up and, because I couldn't stand seeing her cry, because I didn't want to be without her a single second, even with no idea how I'd explain this to my father, and most of all just because I loved her, I said: "Come with me."
"Really?" Her mouth dropped open, she rose on tiptoe, tears forgotten.
I scooped her up in my arms, "Yes. We'll be like Prince Charming and Snow White living happily ever after in snowy Russia!"
"Snowy homophobic Russia!" she cheered, "We'll be so cute they'll change that stupid law!!"
"Maybe you will," I smirked, "but I'll continue to be criminally sexy." She elbowed me in the stomach. "Ouch, what was that for!?"
"Your joke was awful!"
"Sometimes the truth is hard to - oof! I'm holding you up, woman, stop that!"
"Only if you give me a kiss," she said, giggling.
"Gladly, milady."
A/n: Do you, dear reader, seek a happy ending? If so, I encourage you not to read on. I'm not saying it'll be sad but ... stop here, 'kay?
If you wanna read more of my stuff, I'd like to direct you towards This is War. You can find it on my profile and it's what I'll be working on from tomorrow.