This must have been posted on Christmas.
I didn't.
That day everything came down.
I was angry at myself. Still am.
Because you see, what's the whole point of this book? Seeking attention?
Gaining sympathy?
I am playing my life for what?
I was going to type the last chapter that day.
Then shut this book forever.
But I didn't.
I had a message in my box, the person wrote how much they could relate to me.
Then I realized.
This book is not about ME.
This book is not about my shattered life.
It never was.
I met so many people through this book.
People who felt undeserved but same time people who made the former feel deserved.
People who confessed being broken and also people who said, that the heart can be glued.
I opened my eyes to what was infront of me. I realized not everyone's life was rainbow and sunshine.
The girl whom I had envied let me see how messed up she was.
The world where I believed that nothing tragic happened, let me see how life really is.
Tragic. Scary.
But yet, filled with people willing to join hands.
Where there is a yin there is a yang.
I suck, yes a great deal.
You suck too. Admit it.
But together we just don't suck at life, instead we try to fill other's flaw while they fill ours.
I honestly don't know if this book is all about depression and self harm, or a place where I want you to open up. Trust me, there are good souls out there.
It might sound stupid, like I believed before, but just open up. I know that people whom we what to listen don't listen, but just think, even they are like us, waiting for someone to listen to them.
Yes, I'm an attention seeker. You are an attention seeker. Be proud of it.
We don't hide under masks. We seek attention. Because we deserve to.
We deserve to be loved, healed and lived.
I am still in the process of growing up.
I will get moody, depressed. Don't be surprised when there is another chapter going totally opposite this one, but I will again come back, read the 44th chapter.
It's up to you, I would really like you to comment anything, anything at all. A simple 'hi'. Or comment how you feel about yourself. Or send a message of love.