I SAT UP, GASPING FOR AIR TO FILL my lungs as sweat dotted my forhead.
The same nightmare had occured.
It had been a while since I had them, and I thought that they had finally faded away.
But they didn't.
"Miles?" I nearly jumped out of my skin at the sound of a voice beside me.
Right. It was just Michael.
"Go back to sleep. I-I just need some water" I choked out, realizing that I was crying. I quickly threw the sheets off of me and got out of the bed, speed walking out of the room and to the kitchen.
I retrieved a glass from the cupboard once getting there, fumbling with it.
I was panting uncontrollably.
Get a f*cking grip, Miley.
The glass dropped to the ground.
"F*ck" my hands were shaking, and thanks to that, broken glass lay around my bare feet. I could barely even control my movements.
"F*ck" I swore again, wiping at the tears still leaking from my eyes.
Arms suddenly wrapped around my waist, and I jumped again in surprise.
"Are you okay?" Micahel whispered tiredly into my ear, and I wiped at my eyes again.
"Y-yeah, I'm fine. G-go back to bed, I'll clean this up"
"No. I'll clean it" Michael yawned, carefully turning me around in his arms, making sure I wasn't stepping on glass.
"Y-you don't have too. You're tired. I-I'll-"
"Your hands. Holy shit, you're trembling, Miley" and he was right. My whole body was shaking, not just my hands anymore.
"Are you feeling okay?" he asked me, sleep seeming to leave his body as he searched my blue eyes with his green ones.
"I'm fine"
"Go back to bed. I'll be there shortly" he told me, stepping backwards and pulling me away from the glass.
"I-I have to clean-"
"I'll be there shortly" he repeated, and he gave me a gentle push. I hesitated for a minute and he gestured for me to leave again. I nodded my head, slowly making my way back upstairs.
Once I got back into the bed, I lay back down, curling myself up and steadying my breathing.
After acouple of minutes, Michael came back into the room, slipping back into bed and wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me so that my head lay against his chest.
"I love you" he kissed my forehead and I shut my eyes as tightly as I could, wanting the feeling of terror to leave my system.
"What's going on?" he asked me, drawing soothing patterns on my back.
"Nothing" I whispered quickly.
"You're shaking," he moved himself slighty away from me and shifted on the bed. I opened my eyes to see that he was staring directly at me, and he raised his hand to caress my cheek, "What's scaring you?"
I didn't speak and bit my lip. Tears were starting to leak again, and Michael was quick to wipe them away.
"What's scaring you?" He repeated the question and I bit my bottom lip harder, suppressing a small sob.
"She almost killed me"
I had spoken barley above a whisper, but due to our close proximity, I knew that he had heard me. My eyes adjusted to the darkness of the room and I could see him clearly—or rather, as clearly as anyone could see someone else through the darkness—and he pressed his lips into a straight line before he nodded his head slowly.
"She can't hurt you anymore, Firecracker. You're safe"
"She kills me in my dreams," he wiped under my eyes with his thumbs again, "She's still hurting me. From the inside out"
"Don't say that," he was quick to shut down my thoughts, "She can't hurt ypu anymore"
"But she-"
"She's dead, Miley. You know that. She can't hurt you" his tone was sharp and I flinched, nodding my head, my eyes downcast.
"I'm sorry," his tone was gentle again, "You're safe here with me," he whispered, holding me close to him, "Your always safe with me Miley. I promise you that"
I nodded my head against his chest and managed to steady my breathing by listening to his.
Lydia was dead. She would never be able to hurt me anymore. It was impossible now. The only way she would hurt me would be by doing this. Driving me mentally insane with these never ending nightmares that I have whenever I close my eyes or go into a basement.
Michael was right.
I was safe with him.
I am safe with him.
Always.
*
*
*
*
I closed the door to the hospital room behind me and leaned against it, staring at my mum from where I stood.
"Mother"
"Don't give me that attitude young lady" she immediately snapped, and I huffed out a breath, pushing myself off the door and walking over to the hospital chair beside her desk before I promptly plopped myself down in the hard piece of wood.
And then we sat there.
In silence.
With tension.
Fun.
"Michael says he hopes you're feeling well today," I began, "He says he hopes he can come and visit you sometime soon"
She stayed quiet, looking away from me and at the far wall before her gaze met my own.
"How is he?" She finally asked me, and I suppressed my smile.
"If you let him see you then he can tell you himself"
More silence from her end.
"Mom, he cares about me. And he cares about you too. He's funding all your hospital treatments, and he tried to stand in front of a bullet for me. What more evidence do you need? I love him. And I'm safe with him"
"I'm sorry, Miley," she spoke quietly, "I'm sorry I yelled at him"
"Will you let him see you?"
"Of course" she smiled smally, and I got up and hugged her tightly, chuckling to myself. I sat back in the chair and ran a hand through my hair.
"Now what happens?" My mother asked me and I frowned a bit.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, are you two getting married? Are you still living with him? Are you still on track to take over the Empire when you have to?"
I didn't answer right away, not really sure what the answers even were. I mean, I loved Michael. And he loved me. But we haven't really established whether we were still getting married or not. I guess I would have to talk to him about it later.
"I'm not sure about the marriage thing. And the marriage thing affects the empire and us living together, so I'll have to get back to you on those questions" I explained to her, but for the rest of the time that we talked, I couldn't help but think about Michael and I.
There was always this tension between us, for the longest time. He used to hate me—or at least, always be mad at me—and then there was this sexual tension between us. I was still (in my own terms) a virgin at that as well. And then that whole thing with Lydia happened and now things were all cooled down. There was nothing really happening now, and I was a little worried if that would ruin our relationship or not. It felt like we always needed some sort of drama in order to be able to function, and I didn't want that to come between us.
Hopefully our love would be enough.
*
*
*
*
"How was your mom?" Michael asked me as I got into the passenger seat of his car.
I strapped my seatbelt on as he began to drive out of the hospital parking lot, "She wants to see you" I smiled.
I watched a small smile fall on his lips, "Really?"
"Mhm, really. She also said that she was sorry for treating you the way she did last time she saw you. She knows that with her and me, you only ever mean well"
He nodded his head as he drove out of the parking lot and on to the main road. As he continued to drive, my mind traveled back to my earlier thoughts of what was going to happen between Michael and I.
"Mikey?"
"Yeah?"
"What happens now?"
Just as I suspected, he didn't answer me right away. He scratched the back of his neck with one of his hands before sighing and eventually just shrugging his shoulders, "You still in love with me?" He asked.
"Yes"
"Are you sure?"
"Of course"
"Can you say it" he gave me one of his side smiles that I loved so much and I rolled my eyes.
"Michael Clifford, I am in love with you"
"I know it's not the proposal that you wanted, but will you marry me?"
I couldn't help the smile on my lips as I nodded my head. He used one hand to grasp mine and he interlocked out fingers together, making me smile wider.
"Well, our wedding date is in 5 weeks. Everything is still going to play out, if you're okay with it. The Empire will be left to us when I turn 28, but until then, we'd just be married, you know"
"Alright. And we still live together I'm assuming?"
"Mhm"
"Then I guess that's it then?"
"I guess that's it then"
And then there was silence... a lull in the conversation. There was nothing more to talk about and there was nothing more to be said. The silence wasn't awkward, per say, but it also wasn't necessarily comfortable either.
Was this how it was going to be from now on? Quiet?
School was almost out and then there was the Empire to be run. I wanted to go to university, yet, how was I supposed to do that when I had, essentially, signed my life away already?
"What are you thinking about?" Michael's voice intruded my thoughts and I slowly turned my head to look at him.
I loved him.
That much, I was sure about.
But, was I in love with him?
I knew that I had just told him that I was inlove with him, but suddenly, I was second guessing.
I knew that he was in love with me, that was for sure. But was I going to be happy with him for the rest of my life?
"Can you drive me somewhere?" I asked him at long last, pursing my lips and sighing through my nose. Michael glanced at me, a confused smile on his face. I knew that he was happy here, with me, yet, I couldn't help but feel some sort of emptiness inside of me. Along with Lydia, a part of me had died too, and I wasn't exactly sure how to get it back, or even, if I wanted it back.
"Yeah, Miles. Where?" he answered fluently, staring back at the road, and I shrugged my shoulder's a bit before turning to look through the windshield. I felt him rub his thumb over my knuckles and I focused on that.
"The evidence locker where... where they put all of Juli--Lydia's things. I want to see it all"
Michael was quiet before, "Are you sure that that's a good idea?" he asked me, glancing at me again, but now was not the time to second guess myself. If I didn't want to marry Michael, then I would have to figure out soon. The date was coming in quickly.
"Yeah, yeah I'm sure... I think I need some sort of closure"
Without responding, he nodded silently, switching on his indicator to turn around.
I knew that I loved Michael.
But now was finally the time to figure out if I really was in love with him after all these years.
__________________________________
Hey all!
Sorry that I've highkey disappeared for a while (holy shit, like almost six months I didn't even realize), but after posting the previous chapter, I found that I had hit a major writers block. I planned to spend about a week or two (a month at most) deciding the fate of this book, bc my original ending kinda didn't work well anymore.
But as u can tell, my break went on longer then usual and I'm not completely happy with this chapter so what I'm asking of YOU ALL is for some MAJORRR HELP.
LIKE MAJOR HELP!!!
What do YOU GUYS want to happen with this book????
I would REALLY love to hear ur ideas. I've read every single comment u guys have put in this book, and I love you all for supporting me and this story, so I want to make you guys happy as well as myself.
What would you guys like to see??
Comment on this line or pm/dm me if u would like.
Once again, thanks for being patient, even tho I feel as tho this chapter was long over due and lowkey shitty, but thank you nonetheless!
~Macbeth-845😜😝😛😘