When Lauren woke up the next morning she could instantly tell there was something wrong with Liam.
Instead of the smile she always walked into the kitchen to see, she was met with a serious faced brother who had a ton of worry swimming in his eyes as he stared at his phone.
''You alright Liam?'' She asked cautiously and Liam's head shot up in her direction as she walked to the fridge and got herself the carton of orange juice.
His head still followed her as she walked around the counter and sat on a stall in front of him, his eyes dipping with worry every now and then to her bump.
''Uh- I- Yeah. Yeah everything's fine, I got to go out in a minute though.'' He replied back, his tone wasn't as strong as Lauren remembered it to be and she knew something was wrong, but she didn't ask her brother because he would tell her if he wanted to. Lauren then realized he wasn't in his usual of just a pair of boxers or tracksuit bottoms that he slept in, he was dressed in a plain white top and jeans, his leather jacket probably waiting to be put on by the door on the hanger.
''Ah.'' She spoke out in realization. ''Gang business?''
Liam looked like he was debating something, and he was, he was debating whether to lie to his sister or not. Lauren thought he was debating whether he should tell her or not about the business, not the fact that he was thinking of keeping something extremely important from her.
''Yeah that's it. Now, I got to go are you going to be alright?'' He asked her, this time he did not only want to stay because she had trouble with being on her own, but because there was going to be more trouble soon enough and Lauren was in the middle of it.
''Yup, you know I'm getting better now shoo, I'll be fine.'' She scolded and smiled at him. Liam could only smile back but it didn't reach his eyes, she wouldn't be saying that if she knew what was going on.
''Alright, keep the doors locked Ok?'' Liam knew the doors wouldn't be enough, but it just gave his mind a little bit of peace when she nodded. He lent over and kissed Lauren's head in a brotherly fashion before walking out the door and locking it behind him, making Lauren raise an eyebrow at her brother’s behaviour but she just ignored it.
Lauren became bored quickly and decided to fill her book up that she brought yesterday, the special baby one that you could put pictures of your scan or any others in. She filled it up with pictures that she had taken of her bump as it grew bigger and wrote the dates above, leaving room for the more pictures to come. Next she put the scans in the correct order. She now had one more scan picture before her baby was due, the next pictures that would be after that would be her baby growing up, but knowing her, she'd need a few more books to put her baby pictures in considering she was going to be taking pictures of her little girl all the time.
After an hour debating once she finished the book and placed it in her drawer, she decided she was going to paint her daughters room, she had nothing better to do and although it would have been nice to have help like Sebastian's last time, she could manage herself, it's not like she had anyone to help anyway as Liam was becoming more and more busy by the day from his boss's stupid tasks, sometimes during the night he even got called out at three in the morning, she could always hear him leave and come back before she woke up.
With her baby's furniture due tomorrow, she had today to paint before she put it up. So Lauren got the paint and supplies from the living room where they had left it and carried it to the baby's room upstairs, she was already getting tired and she hadn't even done anything. Painting the whole room was going to wear her out, she thought with a huff and placed her hands on her hips.
Once she had put newspaper all over the floor so it wouldn't stain, she switched on the radio she had also brought up and starting painting, instead of changing she just stayed in her pyjamas for less effort considering she was already sweating from her efforts.
The one thing Lauren hated about being on her own like this was that it gave her time to think. Her topic always about someone she didn't have time to think of, or probably didn't even think about her to be honest.
I'm wasting my time, she thought whilst she used the roller to glide the paint across the wall, he didn't even come to a scan when he said he wanted to, he even asked!
Why did he ask to go to a scan which he didn't even turn up to? He had asked to go that day they painted Liam's room, she gave him the time and place yet he still didn't turn up.
Maybe he doesn't want a baby anymore? Maybe he was bored of Lauren and their unborn child already?
She hoped not. Lauren knew that him being with her was basically impossible but she couldn't help wish they could be together, her daughter would have a father there for her then too. Even if he wasn't with Lauren, she wished that he'd say he would see their daughter or at least do something other than just pay for her. Lauren had the money already to look after her daughter, she had more than enough if she was honest, she didn't want his money, she just wanted him to see his daughter.
He was going to be a gang leader soon, how could he not figure out a way to see his daughter in secret?
She just wished for her daughter to have a father there, she knew what it was like to grow up without a parent, or parents in her case not caring for you, she didn't want that for her baby. Her daughter had Liam, but he's not the father, he's only the uncle who's going to spoil the little girl rotten.
The thought brought a smile to Lauren's face, her daughter will have a mum and an Uncle Liam who both love her lots already, so they'll be Ok she guessed.
Lauren just couldn't get past her own feelings for Sebastian though, the first night they had met at the bar, she could remember feeling all funny just looking at him, she wanted to be near him, by his side and not just in bed. And the second time, when she had bumped into him in the alley way she could remember how her stomach filled with butterflies, but that was when she didn't even remember him. She could think back to that day and remember that she forgot him until he reminded her who he was, and before he did, she could feel that same pull she felt in the club, the same urge to be by his side.
But she didn't even know why, he was a stranger then, he still kind of is if she thought about it. But then again, she does know quite a bit about him.
When he came round to paint Liam's room, they talked, and talked, and talked. For the hours that Liam was away, they didn't stop talking until the kiss. He's twenty two, his favourite colour is black, his favourite animal is the wolf, he secretly likes reading, his favourite films are the saw series and he cried at Marley and me when his sister made him watch it, she could go on and on about what they talked about but it went on forever. He also even told her more
about his mum and sister though, she knew by the tone of his voice that not many people knew, maybe only Sebastian's father and Liam knew what really happened.
But the kiss though. She could still remember the way his lips felt on hers, how their bodies fitted perfectly together and how he made her feel. Lauren felt cared for, like he well and truly liked her. It was slow and full of affection, he made her forget about everything around her and just solely think about him. Lauren forgot he was in a gang, forgot he had killed people, forgot he was going to be the leader soon enough, all she could think about was the Sebastian she had been shown that day, the real him.
She really, really liked the real him, and she has gotten over the fact that he is a soon to be gang leader. If he asked her out that day, she would say yes without hesitation. She thought about her daughter’s safety and if they kept it in secret, their relationship, her baby would be fine.
But Lauren thought even harder, if she read between the lines, she could almost get the feeling Sebastian didn't have the same feelings as her. For someone as powerful as him, he could get anything he wanted and do anything he wanted, he could keep it a secret if he tried but he wasn't, he wasn't even trying for their child and her.
Lauren shook her head, she was going to try and not think about Sebastian. If she could help it, she was going to forget about him, if he didn't want her or their child why should she want him? She was going to focus on painting the walls because when she stood back and observed the wall she had just finished painting, it was rubbish, hopefully when it dried it wouldn't look as bad.
''Lauren?... Lauren I'm home!... Lauren where are you?'' Liam shouted out into the silent house, he thought he heard a bit of music playing but it was so low he gathered it was next door. He was worrying, after the news last night and his talk with Sebastian today, he was really worrying.
Liam checked all the rooms downstairs, even looked out into the garden, then he stomped his way to the stairs all the while calling her name. Where could she be? Had he taken her? Killed her? His heart was pumping in his chest like a heavy metal song and a cold sweat was breaking out over his body, he had only left her for a second and he ha-
''LIAM SHUT UP I WAS SLEEPING!'' He heard a voice shout out and he froze in his tracks, breathing in a long welcomed breath. He could feel his body sag with relief and he barrelled his way up the stairs, barging in her room ignoring his sisters shouting and brought her into a massive hug.
''Thank god you’re OK! I seriously though he-''
''Shut up I'm fine, well I was until you woke me up! Now I'm mad, you-'' She started to snap at him, she was extremely angry he woke her up. She had finished the walls about an hour just before he came home and fell asleep straight away, now she was in the middle of telling him off for waking him up but Liam interrupted her.
''Just shut up a second, I need a hug.'' Liam’s heart was finally slowing down to its original beat whilst Lauren just chuckled at him. But then she became serious, he must have had a bad day and here she was laughing at him for it.
''Bad day bro?'' She asked sympathetically and Liam just gawked at her, but she couldn't see as his head was on her shoulder.
He should his head at her blindness and just mumbled a 'yeah'. Since when had he ever hugged her when he had a bad day? Lauren knew he had bad days all the time yet he never asked for a hug, she didn't even blink at his new behaviour, she thought it must have just been an even worse day than usual and it was maybe finally getting to him. That and she was really just too tired to work out that something bad was going on.
''Want to talk about it?'' She mumbled tiredly, Lauren wasn't lying when she said she was sleeping.
Liam hesitated, he wanted to tell her but Sebastian said not to, it wouldn't be good on her considering she was pregnant right now and stress was the last thing he wanted to cause. But she needed to know, she was a major part in what was happening and being in the dark about it was causing more harm than good.
''I- Uh no, you go to sleep. You need it, and a shower because you stink.'' Liam pulled away from the hug and held his nose in a joking matter causing Lauren to scowl at him, all seriousness forgotten for now.
''I've spent all day painting my little girls room thank you very much, I’m obliged to smell a little.'' She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. She didn't smell that bad did she?
Yes, she did. When she lifted her arm up and sniffed even she could admit a shower was needed.
Liam just gave her a funny look and stood up, he had a couple calls to make and even though he wanted to grab a chair and sit in the corner of her room and keep an eye on her, he couldn't.
''Alright then, well I'll leave you to sleep, or shower, whatever it is you’re doing.'' He smiled at her and shook his head at his sister. Now he had a good chance to look at her, her hair was in a knotty mess on top of her head and she had paint all over her face and in her hair. ''A shower would do you good though.''
''Go away I'm sleeping.'' She mumbled and lead back down in bed, once she closed her eyes she was near enough asleep already. Liam just quietly laughed to himself but he felt bad for waking her up, she was clearly exhausted after painting the whole room. Anyone would be though, and considering she was pregnant it must have tired her out more.
''What do you mean he's planning something now?'' Liam asked Sebastian as they sat across from each other in the kitchen, beers in hand as they spoke quietly so they didn't wake Lauren up.
Only it was too late, she was awake and hiding behind the entrance to the kitchen listening to their conversation. She knew she shouldn't be because it could be gang business but she wanted to know why Liam was having a bad day, and this seemed to be the only way she'd find out.
''He said if I don't do anything, he will. Liam you know what that means.'' Sebastian's usually strong voice was weak and tired, something was clearly stressing him out. Lauren wanted to go in there and comfort him, help him in any way she could but she scolded herself not even seconds later. She was going to stay away from him as best as she could.
''This is not good. This is really not good Sebastian.'' Liam stressed and Lauren heard a chair scraping before the sounds of feet pacing across her kitchen floor could be heard. Liam was also clearly stressed about something, what she didn't know though, but she was going to find out.
''I know Liam, I have no idea how to fix this either, I'd die before I let anything happen to her though.'' Sebastian's voice was filled with determination and Lauren felt her heart sink in her chest.
Who was this her? She thought with a bitter mind. Who would he die for?! This is why he doesn't want me or our child, he has someone else...
''I know you would which is the only reason I'm not kicking your ass right now.'' Liam warned and the pacing stopped just as he let out a big frustrated sigh. ''We have to tell her man, she can't stay in the dark any longer it's not good.''
''It's not good to tell her either Liam, not in her condition!'' Sebastian stressed and let out a deep breath. ''She's pregnant Liam, we can't tell her because it will stress her out too much and it's not good on the baby.''
Lauren let out a small gasp. He's got another girl pregnant? She felt her heart drop even further and tears form in her eyes. This was why he couldn't be with her, he's already gotten another girl pregnant.
She suddenly felt a slightly painful pressure just under her ribs but it disappeared as soon as it came. Placing a hand over the area she then felt it again, only this time she felt movement on her hand. Taking her hand off her stomach and lifting her clean shirt up, she looked to the spot she felt movement.
It took a few seconds but there it was again, only this time she could see her belly move with the slight pressure.
Lauren gasped again in surprise, was this the baby kicking? Was it supposed to be painful?
Ignoring the feeling to carry on listening to their conversation, Lauren rushed upstairs not caring if she alerted them to her being there and rushed in her room. Once she made it there she ran over to her draw where she kept her baby books and searched for what those experiences could be.
''Lauren? Lauren what are you doing?'' She could hear Liam shout from downstairs before his feet were stomping up the stairs and to her room.
''I think the baby's kicking.'' Lauren rushed out and found the page she was looking for.
''Well why do you need your books?'' Liam asked confused and walked towards her, Lauren looked over quickly and saw Sebastian was behind him but she ignored the slight feeling of disappointment she got when looking at him.
''Uh, be- hang on let me just read this.'' She mumbled and started reading. When she read the whole of the page she let out a relieved breath, it was normal. When she placed the books back in her draw, she pulled out her special book she had brought where she could put pictures and document her pregnancy. Already having filled it up a little, she looked through it, ignoring the two people who were looking at her weirdly.
Even though she had filled it up earlier and looked through it, she still couldn't help the fuzzy feeling she got when looking over it again. Another kick from her little girl alerted her to what she was originally doing and Lauren grabbed a pen off her drawer and wrote next to the recent scan.
Felt the first kick! 19 weeks + 1 day.
It might seem stupid to some people, but to Lauren it felt special and she wanted to document it. When her little girl was all grown up she wanted to tell her everything she experience, it was something she wished her own mother would have talked to her about and she wasn't going to be like her, ignorant of her own children, Lauren was going to give her child the love she never had.
''Um Lauren, what are you doing?'' Lauren jumped and closed the book in her hands before turning around to the voice. She had forgotten Liam and Sebastian were upstairs with her, and Liam's voice had broken her out of her dazed feeling.
''I- The baby kicked.'' She said like it explained her running up the stairs like something was chasing her and frantically looking through her books.
Liam's face immediately changed from confused to excited and he quickly scrambled over to Lauren.
''Oh let me feel.'' Liam excitedly asked and she laughed and pulled the top up above her bump and placed his hand over where she last felt her daughter kick.
She could see Sebastian's face change from confused to longing and Lauren wondered if he wanted to feel his daughter kick. Why would he if he didn't want them? She thought but shook her head, she wasn't going to be a bitch and not let him be involved in something like this.
''Come here Sebastian, you can feel after Liam.'' Lauren called to him and she felt butterflies immediately start fluttering in her stomach when he smiled at her and immediately rushed over.
''Woooow.'' Liam’s whispered dragged out in the silence and he brought his hand back, staring at it in wonder. Lauren laughed at his amazed expression and grabbed Sebastian's hand, ignoring the warmth she felt pool in her stomach when his hands flattened again her bump.
It took longer this time and Lauren thought she had tired out, but just as she was about to speak she felt her baby kick. It was stronger than when she kicked for Liam, like she knew it was her father’s hand, and Lauren winced when she knocked her against the bottom of her ribs.
''That's amazing.'' Sebastian's voice cracked with emotion and Lauren looked at him, tilting her head to the side whilst deep in thought.
Why was he doing this if he didn't want anything to do with them? Surely he wouldn't look so happy if he didn't want a baby anymore?
''I've got to go pee.'' She mumbled quietly and rushed into her bathroom, she was filling up with unwanted emotion and she had to get out the room before she burst into tears.
The thought of him getting another girl pregnant and experiencing that with her ripped the lid off her emotions and the tears started falling immediately. The feeling of wanting to be with him hit her at full force and she cried harder, sobs wracked her body as released her bladder. She wasn't lying when she said she needed to pee, the baby was leaning on her bladder all day it was a miracle she hadn't wet herself.
Whilst she tried to keep the sobs at bay, she washed her hands and kept the taps on longer to drown her cries out. She didn't want them to know she was crying.
''Stupid hormones.'' She muttered angrily to herself and swiped the tears away, why was she crying in the first place again?
Oh yeah, he had gotten another girl pregnant.
This time when the though assaulted her Lauren didn't cry out, in fact she got angry. Lauren grabbed a wad of tissue and wiped the remaining tears away and splashed her face with cold water, she didn't look as bad now as she had a few seconds ago. And with a deep breath she looked at herself for the last time in the mirror and walked out of her bathroom to find Liam and Sebastian in a deep conversation.
Their conversation intrigued Lauren at first when she heard her name being said, but what she heard after sent a chill down Lauren's spine and she looked at Sebastian with wide eyes, his words causing her to freeze. They didn't seem to realize she had walked out of the bathroom but they did when they heard her loud, frightened gasp.
Both boys turned around to witness a paled face Lauren stagger to her knees in front of the toilet bowl with a protective arm around her bump, and watched as seconds later she brought her breakfast and lunch back up.
What they had just said caused an instinct in Lauren to ignite, a motherly instinct, and she vowed to never let anyone hurt her baby otherwise she would hurt them.
++++++++++++++++++++++++
So not the action that I originally planned to happen in this chapter, but hopefully it will keep you on your toes as to what has made Lauren promise herself that at the end, also what has made Seb and Liam so worried. All will be revealed in the next chapter and it's finally getting started as to where hopefully everything will start happening, like the 'big event' that usually happens in books or whatever you want to call it.
Don't forget to Vote if you like it, it encourages me to write and update faster!