*whispers* You guys can kill me if you want after this chapter ;)
Also pay close attention to this chapter! You'll be needing the references for a future chapter!
Chapter 18 - Bulletproof Love
VIC'S POV
When I woke up, I couldn't stop staring at Iris. We were back at my house, in my bed. After kissing Iris, for what seemed like an hour. I called Mike to pick us up since I was too drunk to drive home and same for Iris.
Iris was sleeping to the left of me, her hair laid perfectly on the pillow as the morning sun shine laid down on her, making her look like an angel. Almost like the first time I've seen love and last that I'll ever need.
She was completely perfect to the way her hair fell into place to her amazing personality and how completely strong she was.
I tried to wrap my head around to what actually happened last night but I had a killer headache. I coudln't believe I let Iris kiss me, or did I kiss her first? Either way, we both kissed back.
And boy did it feel good. But all good things have come to an end.
I shouldn't have kissed Iris even if I'm that much in love with her. I love her so much to the point I told myself I couldn't date her, and I couldn't because she was so fragile.
I wish I wouldn't say that her mental disorders were holding me back but they were
It was the truth.
She was broken and just needed a friend like me and nothing more. She was vulnerable and I didn't want to ask her out and having her instantly saying yes, but she would be only saying yes because she was vulnerable.
But now, I just didn'y know. That kiss, was more than just a kiss. I've been always dreaming of kissing her, but not when she was drunk. I felt like I took complete advantage of her and at the moment I hated myself for it.
I groaned once I got up from my bed, I really needed some Advil. I walked out of my room not really caring that I was in gym shorts and a loose tank top. I walked past the living room until a voice stopped me.
"Are you going to say anything?"
I turned around and saw Mike sitting on the couch, smirking.
"Thank you for picking Iris and I up?" I squinted at him, I knew something was up.
"I don't know if that's going to do, maybe I should tell mother and father." He said as he chug down his coke.
"You. Wouldn't. Dare." I gritted my teeth.
"Oh but I would." He smirked.
I walked forward at him with my hands balled into a fist, if my mom and dad found out I was drunk I'd be dead. Literally. "Listen here, MIKE." I spat as I grabbed a fist full of his shirt he had one. "Tell our parents, you're dead. Got me?" I growled.
"Okay! Okay, I got it! Please don't hurt me!" He squealed. I laughed and let go off his shirt.
"Oh little brother." I mumbled.
I walked away and into the kitchen, desperately trying to find Advil. I searched throughout the medicine cabinet that holds all the medicine. I finally found a bottle, in which was in the very back of the cabinet. I took out two pills and filled a glass with water and swallowed.
"Where are Mom and Dad?" I asked Mike as I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch.
"Work." Mike simply said. I sighed and sat back in the couch. I needed to talk to someone about Iris and I, seems like Mike is my last resort.
"Mike," I firmly said to get his attention.
"Yeah?" He turned his head away from the TV.
"So I need advice." I started off with.
"When do you not." Mike retorted.
"It's about Iris," I said, ignoring his witty remark.
"I thought we went over this before. You're madly in love with her but you're just going to hide your feelings like always." Mike shrugged.
"Yeah well those feelings kinda released last night." I practically gave Mike the death stare, mad because he was not taking me serious.
"What do you mean?" Mike's eyes widen, surprised for sure.
"Iris and I kiss." I whispered. Mike's jaw drop and shook his head.
"That's amazing! Now you guys can go out and live happily ever after." He smiled and got up from the couch.
I grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled him down on to the couch. "You obviously don't understand, I can't." I snapped.
"Dude get off me!" He yelled at me. "Hopefully, she forgot cause she was drunk." He moves his shoulders up and down.
"Forget what?" A voice chimed in. Mike's eyes widen as mine did too. We both looked up to see Iris standing there innocently.
"Oh um nothing." Mike coughed and suddenly sat up straight.
"Nothing." I faked a smile. "Need Advil?" I nervously ask.
"Yes," Iris gave me a warily look. She walked over to the kitchen as I got up from the couch and looked back at Mike as I walked.
"What do I do now?" I whispered in a yelling tone.
"I don't know!" Mike said.
I couldn't ever lose her, I'm afraid, I better think of something good to say...
I groaned when I walked into the kitchen. Iris had already found the Advil and was drinking it up. I walked over to the counter where she was at and sat on top of it. "Soooo." I said.
Praying that she didn't remember our kiss. "Vic, if you're just trying to annoy me while I have a hangover you are gladly mistaken." Her face showed no expression.
"Remember anything last night?" I smiled, trying not to sound obvious but I was failing miserably.
"Barely." She responded as she walked away.
"Oh thank God." I sighed and got off the counter. I walked into the living room to find Iris lying on the couch watching TV.
I was a little upset she didn't remember I have to admit, but it probably for the best. Although now I'll never know if we could have ever be a 'thing'. I was a tad bit heartbroken, but I will just to have to get over it.
"Can you give Iris and me a ride to my truck?" I asked Mike.
"Sure, I'll be here once you change." He was referring to my pajamas.
I walk away and back into my room. I searched through my closet and finally picked out tan shorts and a blue The Wonder Years shirt and black Nike sneakers. I quickly brushed my hair not giving a damn to look in a mirror. I walked out and notice Mike and Iris waiting at the door. Iris was wearing my red plaid pajama pants and my oversized sweater. "We'll have to drop by your house." I mumbled as we walked out the front door.
Iris and I both hopped in the back seat of Mike's red Ford sedan and soon we were on our way back to retrieve my truck.
.:.:.:.:.:
"Thanks Mike." I waved at Mike who was leaving the parking lot. He waved back and soon left. I looked over to Iris who was sitting next to me in the passenger side. "So, your house?" I nervously asked.
"Yeah, my Dad shouldn't be home. He should be at work." She quietly said.
My heart sunk a little, she didn't even want to go home even though her father wasn't even there. She doesn't deserve that. Nonetheless, I nodded my head in agreement and started the engine.
I pulled into Iris' house's drive away and parked my truck. We both got out and walked to the front door. Iris unlocked the door with the key she had. We open the door, and it looked like a tornado came through overnight. "Holy shit." I mumbled at I picked up the broken photo frame.
"Don't pick up anything. I don't want my father to know I was here." Iris's voice was completely monotone, she showed no emotions. She was really good at hiding her feelings…
"Then go make a bag of extra clothes." I sighed. I never planned on having Iris' stay over, but I didn't want Iris to ever to see her dad again, even though it wasn't up to me. Besides, Iris' birthday is coming up and she'll be finally eighteen and be able to go whatever the hell she wants.
As Iris walked upstairs, I walked towards the kitchen. And of course the kitchen was a wreck. Beer bottles were everywhere, some even broken - Shattered plates too. He must have done this after we left. I walked towards the back door and into the backyard. I stopped in my tracks and looked at the big oak tree. I always became upset every time I looked at the tree. Hearing Iris' story that one morning, how she would spend her childhood in the tree. And the only reason why she did was to see if anyone would come and find her. To see if her parents would notice she was gone for hours, and of course they didn't.
"Ahhh, found you." Someone said behind me, I turned around and saw Iris. She was in mid-thigh shorts and along with a black Vans muscle tank top with several bracelets on her wrists. I even notice a black duffel-bag in her hand. She looked lovely like always.
"Hey." I smiled.
"Hi."
She walked over to where I was standing and looked around. She looked upset, and for once, I didn't know what to say to her. "How' have you been doing?" I asked, Iris is the type of person to show pain but not tell anyone why unless she was asked.
"Okay, I just," She paused.
"Go on." I courage her.
"I feel so sad all the time, but I've been like that forever, but these past days it's been different. I just never want to get out of bed. Do nothing. If it wasn't for you, I probably would have been in bed and waste my life away every day." She said. "I miss my mom. That as well."
I looked over her, it was nice hearing I was making a difference but it reminded me of why we could never be. "Can we get going? I don't want to run into my Dad." She half smiled. I nodded my head and we were soon back into my truck.
.:.:.:.:.:.
Iris POV
We pull into the parking lot and walk to the back of the record store. "Hey Jc." I greeted him with a hug. Jc stepped back and gave Vic and me a weird look.
"Is that?" Jc paused and sniffed the air. "Is that a hangover I smell?" He cheekily smiled.
"Yes, now shut up because you're making it worse." Vic groaned as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
I giggled and walked to the checkout counter and sat on top of it.
"So do you guys have any plans for tonight?" Jc asked, looking back at Vic and I.
"Nope not really. My parents won't be home tonight or Mike so I think Iris and I are just going to hang out there." Vic shrugged.
"Oh, nice." Jc smiled. "So tell me this," Jc smirked. "I really like to know" He paused and stepped closer to me. Was this flirting? Iris, you dumb ass. You can never tell if someone is or not.
"How did a sweet girl like you, get drunk?" He finished the sentence, his face was close to mine. I could feel his breathing tumbling down my neck.
"Okay, how about you stand back a little." Vic grumbled and took him by the shoulder. Jc obeyed and stepped back and laughed.
"But no seriously, how?" His lips curled into a sweet shining smile, oh how I melted every time I saw him smiling. There was something about him that I liked. Iris, stop crushing on Jc, he's your boss after all.
"Just did." I answer with a shrug. Soon Vic's phone went off, he ended up stepping outside to take the call. I suddenly became anxious like I always do, then I remember I forgot to take my anxiety medication. "Fuck." I mumbled.
"What?" Jc looked up from his IPhone and frowned.
"Oh um nothing." Iris, you're so stupid.
Misery quickly washed over me, I didn't want to be here anymore, in this store at least.
"Hey, are you okay?" Jc question.
"Yeah, just fine. Why?" I frantically said.
"Oh, it just looked like you were panicking that's all. And pale. Are you sure you're okay?" He asked again. Okay, so maybe I was panicking for no reason at all. I just didn't want Jc to know, I just wanted one person to think of me as a normal person. Vic walked back in, and he didn't look too happy.
"Trouble in paradise?" Jc asked.
"Sorta." Vic grumbled. "Well, I think Iris and I are going to get going. Just wanted to stop by. I need some food. It's already four."
"Okay, man. Take it easy." Jc gave Vic a small hand shake, or what I like to call a bro hand shake. I hopped off the counter and gave Jc a hug, in the mid of the embrace, Jc whisper in my ear. "And more importantly, you take it easy, okay?" I let go of Jc and nodded my head in agreement.
Vic and I were back in his truck, completely pigging out on McDonald's. Wrappers were everywhere as we sat in the truck. We were parked at the beach's parking lot, with the windows rolled down and the sun beating down on us. Soft music played and the beach breeze slowly came in and out of the truck.
"Mmmmm. Why is McDonald's so good, but so bad for your health." Vic moaned as he took a bite into his second cheese burger, he wasn't lying when he said he was hungry...
"Right?" I agreed with him as I took a sip of my drink.
"So who called you earlier?" I've been dying to know. Stop being so nosy, Iris.
"Oh, just doctors. They want you to come in tomorrow." He nervously said, something was up other than that. I decided to drop it and just nodded my head.
We finished up eating and soon started to walk around the town. We stopped by a couple of stores here and there. It was a nice day to go window shopping.
.:.:.:.:.:.
It's now past six, Vic and I were back at his house, we were in the backyard to be exact. We were sitting on the lounge chairs, the sun was setting making the sky an orange along with blues and a hint of pink that reflected on the clouds. I always loved Vic's backyard. I've constantly wanted a pool with a hot tub like he did, and amazing landscaping that Vivian did. I sat back in my chair and looked over at Vic who was casually drinking an Arizona Tea, and I drinking Peace Tea, we always got into arguments which one is better.
"So why isn't Mike here?"
"He's at night school so he can graduate early so he can tour with the band." Vic simply said.
"Wow, he must be pretty serious about the band." I said.
"All of us are pretty much." Vic shrugged.
I smile. "That must be really exciting."
"Yeah it is, lots of hard work. We're putting a lot of effort into this album. I want to make sure it's perfect. All I've ever wanted to do in my life was to travel the world along with performing. I feel like I have a good chance and I'm not letting that chance go away."
"I wish I could have a bright future like you and the guys do." I said..
Vic looked over at me and shook his head "Your future is only a few heart beats away, and it's bright. Very bright." He cheekily smiled.
I shrugged and went back at staring at the sun set. Vic's house and neighborhood was in the California hills, high up in the sky. Vic's backyard looked down on other house that sloped down on the hill. And when it was sun set, it was quite peaceful and beautiful. I could sit here forever, perfectly content - but that only lasts for a short period of time.
"Hey, wanna try something new?" Vic had a devilish grin.
"With that smile of yours I don't think I do." I smirked.
"Just hold on for one second." He then got up and went inside the house.
After a couple of minutes flew by, he came back. My mouth completely dropped. "Does your mother know about this!" I yelled at him, I was shocked but not scared to say the least.
Vic had a blue and green glass blown bong in his hand along with weed in a clear plastic bag. He sat down in his chair and pulled the small table in front of him to place the items on it.
"Of course she doesn't." Vic smiled and shook his head.
"Who's owns this?" My eyes didn't leave the bag of marijuana.
"Mike's. I barely smoke this though." He shrugged like it was no big deal.
"Want some?" He looked at me and gave me his infamous crooked smile.
"Well," I thought about it for second. What's the worst that can happen? "sure. Why not?"
He loaded it up, and I was soon high along with Vic.
Hours later, we're loopy. "But no, that's was hilarious." Vic and I laughed until we choked, recalling on an old memory.
"Hold on, watch this." Vic stood up and walked away. He flipped a switch and soon the backyard lights came on, Christmas lights that is. Hung everywhere along with other lights. It was now night time, completely dark with only the stars and the moon to light up everything. He switched on the speakers that hooked up to his phone. The outside speakers where surround sound, making it amazingly awesome.
"I knew you would like that." He grinned as he sat back down.
Music filled my ears, although I couldn't tell what song it was.
"I love this song!" Vic yelled over the music.
"What song is this?" I asked.
"I don't know." Vic shrugged whilst laughing.
"I'll sing along, oh 'Cause I don't know any other song. I'll sing along," He sang to the rhythm of the song.
"You're something else." I shook my head as I laughed.
"This was the best time of my life." He said randomly.
"You and I getting high is the best time of your life?" I lifted an eyebrow.
"No," He laughed. "I meant this summer. I can't believe it's almost over. In which I have to tell you something." He then became serious.
I was too scared to look at Vic, whenever he was serious like this when he needed to tell me something usually isn't good, so I just looked beyond the sky.
"So the band," He took in a deep inhale. "It's doing well. We have many gigs coming up as you know. Meaning I'll be gone for a week. All the gigs are up the coast of California."
"Oh."
"It's only for a little while. We just need to do this to get out more. But there's more." He sighed. "Okay, go on." I said.
"After that, we will try to hit Nevada and Arizona." He said. "That's not that bad." I lied. "I can manage." I smiled, I was lying again. Iris, please. We all know you can't make it.
"Then after the album is out, we got a chance to be the opening for this band. They're taking us around America." He cracked a smiled, but soon that faded away. "Will you be okay?" He asked. I looked over at Vic, he looked upset.
"Yeah. Yeah, Vic. I'll be good." I whispered. He half smiled as he sighed.
"You can call me at any time and I'll have the van coming straight home at any given time." He said. I nodded my head as I yawn.
"We should get in bed." Vic stood up and gave me his hand and helping me up from the chair. He grabbed the bong and soon we were back in the house, with the bong hidden so his parents would never find and back in his bed room.
I looked around Vic's room, as Vic settle down in his bed. I searched through many of his binders that lay in the corner of his room. I was bored out of my mind when a wrinkled note accidentally fell out of a leather small book, that looked like a journal. I frowned and picked up the note. I opened it and my mouth completely dropped. I cringed from the sight of it, I couldn't believe Vic still had it. It was my old suicide note, from one of my recent attempts last May. As I read it, there was one part that always stuck out.
If you were me, you'd do the same 'Cause I can't take anymore. I'll draw the shades and close the door. Everything's not alright and I would rather...
That one single part of the massive written letter stuck out the most for me, out of all the words I've written. "Whatcha looking at?" I jumped from his voice. Hide it!
"Um, just a note that fell from this journal." I said still looking at the note, scared to look behind to face Vic.
Vic sat down next to me crisscross on the floor and grabbed the note from my hand.
"Oh." He said, finally realizing what I had.
"Why do you still have it?" I whispered.
"Just forgot." He shrugged. I grabbed the leather journal and scanned it. I was just about to open then Vic quickly snatched it from me.
He weakly smile, "Personal."
"Oh sorry," I whispered. "can I have pajamas?"
I ended up completely forgetting to bring night wear when I packed my bags. "Yeah, let me see if I have anything. All my clothes are basically in the wash." He stood up and went to his closet.
I decided to do something wild, and out of ordinary for me. When Vic gave me his oversized blue v-neck and clean boxers, I only changed into the v-neck that went to just above my knees. I wanted to try it for many reasons, why? Because I did remember last night, I remembered the kiss perfectly clear. I pretended I didn't only because Vic and I could never be. I knew I would get hurt in the long run, and I wasn't able to bring myself to tell the truth when Vic asked me if I remembered anything because I couldn't ruin Vic's and I relationship we already had. Although right now, I wanted to entice Vic, see if anything would happen. I wanted to see if he had feelings for me, and if he did then I would be able to stop anything from going any further. Iris, you're so stupid.
"Don't want the boxers?" Vic frowned from the sight of me.
"Nah, I'm good." I said, hopping into his bed as Vic turned off the lights. He soon turned on his TV and got into the bed. He wrapped his arm over me, and snugged his head into the crook of my neck.
"I'm glad you're still here, on this Earth. Breathing and living. I don't know what I'd do without you, Iris." He whispered into his ear. Just hearing that was music to my ear although I was mad, I felt as if he was leading me on.
"Vic," I said, after a few minutes of silence between us, only the TV was breaking the stillness. "Who do you like? Any crush?" I dare to ask.
"I do have a crush. Well more like someone who I really like like," He paused. "Maybe even Love." He whispered.
"What does she look like," I said sweetly, trying to ask as uncomprehending as I am always am. But this time I was doing it on purpose. I was trying to see if I can get the truth out.
"There's nothing much to talk about her. Good night, Iris." He rushed out firmly and then turned off the TV by the remote.
My heart shattered in millions of pieces it felt like, I was now confused and hated myself for trying to investigate like I did. Should have left it alone, there was a reason why Vic didn't want you to remember this kiss last night, Iris.
_____________
A.N
Oooooo snap!
Anyone expected that? Hmmmmm?
Hope you paid close attention, you'll be needing a lot of references of the recent chapters for future chapters. Everything will be picking up! Yay :) (Literally quoted bulletproof love, hold on till may and even Kissing in Cars)
Vote and comment, can't believe I have over 2,000 reads. Happy new year you guys! I started this fanfic in November and it's now already January!
Bulletproof love by Pierce The Veil is on the side!
-Kc Jan.4.2014