Thomas was feeling nervous the next day at school. What he did to Newt broke him into pieces. He had never wanted to hurt him. He would rather kill everyone -including himself- before hurting the blonde. But in the end that's what he did. And he didn't just hurt him once. Thomas had hurt him a lot of times. Sometimes by pushing him against lockers, walls or doors, sometimes by shouting at him or saying something hurtful, sometimes by saying nothing at all and shutting the boy out. But this time he had gone to far. He had hit him.
Thomas didn't expect Newt to forgive him..God he didn't even want to forgive himself, but he wanted to be sure the boy knew he was sorry. He wanted Newt to know how bad he felt for hurting him. Maybe they could be friends ?
Who was he kidding. Thomas didn't want to be friends with Newt. No, he wanted Newt to be his. He wanted him to be his boyfriend. Okay so maybe Thomas was finally admitting it to himself...He was head over heels in love with the blonde. He loved him, and Thomas would fight for him. Newt had fought for him and never gave up, well at least not until now. So he was going to do the same. He was going to fight for the person he loved. And he was not going to give up until he had what he wanted.
He walked into the cafeteria and just sat down at his table. He was too broken and too nervous to eat. He glanced over to where the gladers were sitting, hoping Newt would sit with them, smiling and having fun. But he wasn't. He looked to the table in the corner and his heart broke just that little bit more. Newt was sitting there his head in his hands and shaking uncontrollably. Thomas knew he was crying and looked down at his lap when he felt his eyes burn and tears started to make their way down his cheeks. He had to apologize and he had to do it soon.
After 15 minutes Thomas finally looked up again, wiping away the tears on his cheeks. He felt the urge to look at the blonde again and tried to fight it he knew it would break his heart even more if the boy was still crying. After a few seconds he couldn't help it anymore and glanced over at the brown haired boy. To his surprise Newt was staring right back at him. The bruise on his face still very obvious, his eyes red and puffy. But most of all they didn't shine. The normally cheerful, sparkling eyes, they had no shine, no sparkle, just pain. He watched as Newt took his stuff and left when the bell rang and sighed.
" would you like to tell us what your opinion is on this subject, Newt ?" Mrs.Jones asked during history. Everybody knew History was Newt's favorite subject. Minho looked over at Newt next to him expecting to see a big grin on the boys face as he began to tell his opinion on the Greeks but instead he slowly looked up at the teacher, not saying anything for a while before clearing his throat.
"I have nothing to say, Mrs. Jones." his voice sounded a little hoarse, Minho didn't think he had heard Newt speak since yesterday when Gally wanted to hurt Thomas. The blonde looked back down, very aware of the shocked looks directed his way.
"Are you sure? you always have a nice story to tell." Mrs Jones tried again, smiling sadly at Minho. Mrs.Jones was the sweetest teacher he had ever had.
Newt's head shot up. "I told you, Mrs. Jones I don't have anything to tell you. Just go on with this freaking lesson and leave me alone!" he snapped.
Minho looked at Newt in shock. He had never heard the boy snap at a teacher before, he was like the teacher's pet or something. Every teacher loved him. Minho looked back at Mrs. Jones who looked shocked as well but she cleared her throat and continued to tell the class about the Greeks, Glancing at Newt every once in a while, hoping to see any hint of a smile or excitement from the boy, but nothing. he just sat there, looking down.
Newt sighed as he sat down in Glee club that day, he had only joined because Minho had made him. sure he liked to sing and play the piano but Glee club ? He never would have joined if it wasn't for his friends. He sat down as far away from the others as possible. Mr. Duval came in not much later, glancing at Newt before sharing a worried glance with the rest of the Glee club.
"Okay guys this week we'll be doing songs from Grease!" the club cheered. "I want you to be as creative as you can be!"
Newt was well aware of the things that were going on. How his friends and teachers tried to cheer him up...Really ? Greeks now Grease ? He wasn't a bloody moron. he just hated that the only reason they did things he liked was because he was so depressed. They shouldn't be learning about Greeks until April and would never doing Grease if it wasn't to make him feel better.
Newt hated how they tried so hard, he was broken, defeated and Thomas didn't even try to talk to him since he had hit him. It seemed like he didn't feel sorry at all. Like he didn't even care he was depressed, like he didn't even care he had hit him.
He hated himself for thinking Thomas would ever love him the way he did, he hated himself for thinking he could actually be his friend, he hated himself for thinking he could help the boy, he hated himself for trying so hard when it was obvious he would never get in. He hated himself for thinking he would ever know the real Thomas. He hated himself for dreaming about a life, a future, a life where they would live happily ever after a life where they grew old together and would have beautiful children.
Newt didn't realize he was crying until Minho pulled him from his chair and sat down with him on the ground. Minho pulled him into his lap and held him close as he sobbed into his shoulder. The whole room was silent except from Newt's loud, heart breaking sobs. Minho looked up at his friends with tears in his eyes, only to find a few of them crying too. Teresa had buried her head into Winston's chest crying silently, Mike was rubbing Jessica's arm as tears slid down her cheeks. Newt was part of the family and his sobs were heart breaking. Even some of the guys had tears in their eyes but refused to let them fall.
Minho sighed softly as Newt's sobs stopped and the boy looked up, wiping the tears of his face. "I'm sorry." He mumbled, crawling out of his lap and sitting back in his seat. The room stayed silent for a moment.
"Okay, guys, Gre-" was cut of by someone clearing his throat behind him. Newt's head shot up at the sound and as he had expected Thomas was standing nervously in the doorway. he raised an eyebrow when he walked in and stood only a few feet away from him.
"what are you doing here?" Newt asked.
Minho shot up from his seat and grabbed Thomas by the collar, pushing him against the wall.
"I don't care how bad you are Sterling, you hurt him. Now I hurt you."
"Don't!" Newt shot up from his seat. Everyone turned to look at him in shock, except for Teresa, who sighed.
"Newt are you kidding me ? He hurt you!" Minho said angrily, but let go of Thomas and stepped back.
"I don't care, Just...Just don't hurt him."
Minho sighed but walked back to his seat, glaring at Thomas as he did so.
"So what can we do for you ?" Mr.Duval asked a little uncomfortable.
He didn't reply but instead turned to look Newt in the eyes, who looked right back at him.
" I came here to apologize..and.. I.. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness and I don't ask for it, but I just want you to know this... I..I'm really, really sorry for what I did Newt, and not only for the time I hit you, but for all the times I managed to hurt you in any way possible..." Thomas was silent for a moment opening and closing his mouth a few times.
"God..I..I'm really not good with words Newt.. But.. I.." Thomas took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a second, pushing away the tears before looking right into his eyes again. "I love you, Newt. I really do...and... I...God Just listen to this please..." Thomas turned walking over to the piano and siting behind it, looking straight at the blonde who had started crying silently.
Thomas took a deep breath, lying his fingers on the cold keys and stared to play, looking straight at the boy he loved. He forgot all about the others in the room. He didn't care they saw past his mask he just needed Newt back.
Newt's eyes widened for a moment, Thomas had lied about not being that good in playing the piano. But he pushed that thought away listening carefully as tears slid down his face.
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
Newt gasped softly at how perfectly the song fit with them... It was almost like the song was created for them. Everything fell into place and Thomas' voice was so beautiful he never wanted to hear another sound again.
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with every day
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
and the reason is you
Thomas' voice was slightly cracking form the emotion but he kept going, through the whole song he kept staring at Newt, not breaking his gaze, not once. He seemed to know the whole song out of his head, he seemed to know perfectly where all the keys were.
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
Newt was crying harder as he finished to song, his voice cracking a little as he was crying too now.
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
Thomas stopped playing looking down at the piano, too afraid to look at Newt or anyone else. He wiped away his tears. He slowly stood up, not looking at anyone as he turned to leave. He gasped loudly as a body crashed against his, warm arms wrapping around him tightly. Thomas hugged back from the second he realized it was Newt. Wrapping his arms around his waist holding him tightly and burying his face into the crook of his neck.
"I'm so sorry, Newt. I'm so sorry for everything. I...I love you." Thomas' words were muffled but Newt could hear them clearly, he held him even closer.
"It's okay..I forgive you. I love you too. It's fine. I love you so much, Tommy"
Thomas leaned back enough to look him in the eyes. "God, I love you, I love you, I love you." He said before Kissing Newt passionately, cupping his cheek as the blonde's hand tangled in his hair.
The bell rang and thomas pulled away.
"Let's go to my house and we'll talk."
"You don't have to, I want you to talk to me when you're ready."
"I am ready. common." Thomas took Newt's hand in his, tangling their fingers together and walked out of the room. unaware of the big smiles that were spread across the faces of the whole room.
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So I heard this song earlier and I just HAD to include it in the story. it fits them perfectly. So I'm sorry if it was a bit of a surprise that they were suddenly in glee club but hey I kinda like it :)