Thirteenth Night; Malvolio's Revenge

Act 1 Scene 4

Enter Sir Andrew and Maria
Maria: Sir Andrew, my Lady would wish to speak with you once more.
Sir Andrew: Why, i' faith?
Maria: I know not. 'Twill be swift, as she ist drawing plans for the wedding between her and Master Sebastian.
Sir Andrew: Are they not wed as of yet?
Maria: She wished to celebrate openly.
Sir Andrew: I've desired to return home for many weeks now. I've no money.
Maria: This will take no time. Sir Toby hadst not bid you farewell, neither.
Sir Andrew: There's no escape, I warrant.
Enter Malvolio
Malvolio: Mistress Mary, my Lady would speak with you.
Maria: Malvolio, how kind of you to return. How is't with you? Art thou sane?
Malvolio: 'Tis none of your concern. My Lady calls.
Maria: And I shall answer. Sir Andrew, come thy ways.
Malvolio: I'll bring him anon.
Exit Maria
Sir, I trust you've good reason to flee?
Sir Andrew: Worry yourself not. The business is mine own.
Malvolio: You are wearing your sword.
Sir Andrew: What matter is in't? Canst not a knight travel with his sword?
Malvolio: Marry, Sir, can I see it?
Sir Andrew: I warrant, ast thou noticed it.
Malvolio: Wouldst thou allow me to wield it? I have become entangled in matters of honor and have not my own blade. One canst not duel unless he swings a sword.
Sir Andrew: Oh no, Sir. You do not swing a rapier. They are styled for fencing.
Sir Andrew hands Malvolio his sword
Malvolio: What sayest thou?
Sir Andrew: The sword is wielded i' a thrusting motion.
Malvolio: In this fashion?
Malvolio stabs Sir Andrew
Sir Andrew: Ay, Sir.
Exeunt