A day before December 31st
AIDEN
"Really, mom?"
"Really." Mom looks ready for anything. Well, anything except a warmer temperature. Clothed head to toe in a beanie, a scarf, gloves, earmuffs, boots and no doubt at least three pairs of socks, layers of shirts and a winter coat on top of it all, she looks like she put on her entire closet.
"But I was just about to go visit Emma," I say.
I haven't been able to see Emma once since I got home four days ago, even though that's all I want to do. Mom and dad have been insisting we spend some more 'family time' together, which has consisted of playing games such as Scrabble and Boggle, eating gingerbread cookies and drinking hot chocolate, skyping our grandparents who love to talk for ages (that must be where Stevie gets it from) and Stevie and I bickering with each other when we get bored. Now mom is insisting that we go for a walk in the absolutely freezing weather outside.
"Does she know that you're coming?" Mom asks.
I shake my head.
"Well, then, you can just drop by after our quick family walk." Mom smiles at me.
"But I want to-" I start.
"Enjoy a lovely walk with your sister and parents. I know." Mom finishes for me.
"You don't know-" I try again.
"How much you're looking forward to it." Mom grins at me childishly.
"Can we just-"
"Leave already? But of course," mom winks at me and then yells for my dad and Stevie to get here so that we can go.
I hang my head slightly in submission. I know when I've been beat.
Once we're out of the house and trudging, me miserably, Stevie with a skip in her step, and mom and dad amiably, across the sludgy, snowy lawn, I look up at the sky. It looks dark and threatening, like there will be a storm later.
"How long will this walk be, exactly?" I wonder aloud.
"Hmm...since you seem to be enjoying it so much, there's no rush," mom smiles smugly at me.
I give her a 'seriously?' look and carry on walking. Jiro, my German shepherd and faithful companion, bounds along beside us, chasing after Stevie.
We're walking on the pavement beside the street when an old black Ford whizzes past us. It gives Stevie a fright, which serves her right for walking so close to the road when I've repeatedly told her not to. It gives me a fright too, not because of the speed it passes us at, but because of the face I saw behind the wheel.
I thought he'd left, Emma said he had.
What is Blaze doing here?
~ ~ ~
After the hour long walk, we finally start to make our way back home.
"See, Aiden? That wasn't so bad, was it?"
"No," I tell my mom, before grumbling under my breath, "it was worse."
"I heard that," Stevie gives me a sly look.
"Me too," mom says, and throws a play punch to my shoulder. "You just wish it could be longer, don't you?"
I shake my head at her and grin. My mom can be a tease sometimes, and I'm grateful she has a sense of humour.
My dad, on the other hand, is a very serious man. I glance at him now only to see he's frowning, oblivious to the moment the rest of us are sharing and probably deep in thought. Maybe he's thinking about something to do with work.
When we get home, I turn to mom with pleading eyes. "Can I go see Emma now?"
She smiles and pinches my cheek. "For the sake of young love, yes."
"Mom." I roll my eyes.
But I practically run to my car and hop into it. Next stop, Emma's house.
Upon arriving there, I see that Daniel is with Cleo on the front porch. They appear to be talking about something that makes them both laugh at the same time. A joke, maybe.
Cleo told me about Daniel and all that had happened. At first I didn't like the idea of them spending so much time together now, given the fact that the first impression I had of Daniel was of him bullying Cleo. But now, it seems that they are really enjoying each other's company. God's amazing plan played out and Daniel was saved, and perhaps that plan is even bigger than I would think possible, maybe it involves Cleo and Daniel having a future together. If that's going to be the case, then I'm happy for them.
That's the thing. God's plan is always more beautiful, more complex and more full of surprises than any of us could imagine.
But still, Daniel hasn't won my trust completely. Not yet. I'll be keeping an eye on him to make sure he doesn't cause Cleo any trouble.
"Hey," I greet them both, as I climb out of the car and make my way to the house.
Today is bittersweet. Mostly bitter, though. I'm both looking forward to and dreading this. Looking forward to it, because I missed Emma. Dreading it, because today is the day I must break things off with her.
I can't do this anymore.
It's not fair to her and it's not right for me to be keeping this up when I know we have different beliefs, different principles. I know that at the moment she thinks we both have the same views on Christianity. But she's in for a surprise, and she won't see it as a good surprise.
I'm going to miss her and long for her like crazy, but the whole time I'm doing that I'll also be praying and trusting God to speak to her heart.
I know that He has the ability to make everything work out for the two of us, to call her back to His arms.
"Hi, Aiden." Cleo waves at me. "How was the trip to Homestead?"
Daniel simply nods in my direction. His eyes say he's unsure about me, and I don't blame him, not after the fight we had. My bruises took quite a while to heal, his probably did as well. But maybe we can pretend that didn't happen.
"It was good, thanks," I answer Cleo. "How have you all been?"
"Good, all good," she smiles at me before sharing a second smile with Daniel, one that obviously means something.
"Is Emma home?" I ask her.
She shakes her head. "You missed her by about twenty minutes. She left for a hike by herself on Mount Mansfield, said she needed some time alone. Carpenter dropped her off."
"Oh." I frown, disappointed that she didn't invite me along. But I know what it feels like to need some time to think. "Well, thanks, Cleo. Do you think it's okay if I go meet her there?"
She shrugs. "Sure. She's been missing you, kept on telling me that she can't believe you haven't come by since you got home," she says this lightly to let me know that Emma is not really holding a grudge. Or, at least I hope that's the impression she's trying to give.
"I guess I'll just head on over there, then," I say.
"Good idea," Cleo agrees. "Just give me a call to let me know what time you two will be home. I don't want our parents worrying about either of you, since it looks like there will be a storm."
"What she really means," Daniel grins mischievously at her, "is that mother hen Cleo will be the one worrying."
"Hey!" She elbows him in the stomach.
"What?" He exclaims innocently. "You can't even deny it yourself."
She ignores him to look at me. "Bring her home to us, Aiden."
"I will." I give them a smile and a wink, before turning on my heel and heading for the car.
~ ~ ~
EMMA
I guess I just needed some time away from everything. To mull over facts. Facts like how Aiden hasn't even called since he got home, or that other fact that I actually don't want to mull over, the fact that I can't stop thinking about Blaze and his last appearance.
"You've got nothing left that interests me anyway."
His words echo in my head, haunting me.
That's what he said, but I've heard him lie so many times that by now I should be able to recognize his bluffs. The look in his eye when he said that to me scared me. Did he mean it? Or is he just biding his time?
I keep on expecting him to jump out of nowhere and yell 'surprise' or something, but it doesn't happen, and for that I'm grateful.
It's just in my head.
Actually, let me rephrase that. It's probably just in my head.
For now, it's only me, me and the mountain I've come to love ever since Aiden took me up here. I stand on the point where we stood when he asked me to be his girlfriend. The only difference is that it's covered in snow now. And, of course, Aiden isn't here with me.
Staring out at the beautiful land that lies before me, I feel my heart thud in rhythm to the sound of the wind howling.
Whoosh, swoosh. Thud, thud. Swoosh, whoosh. Thud, thud.
"Well done, Em."
I jump at the sound of a voice behind me.
"I was going to plan a setup like this of some sorts, but you went and made it so easy without me having to lift a finger. Thank you," the voice says.
I don't even flinch. Instead, I think hard and I think fast. I need to buy myself some time. "I was right. You came," I say softly, and dully, like I'm bored. "You're so predictable."
"Am I now?" his voice is close to me all of a sudden, right behind me, his breath traveling down my neck. "Maybe to you. Only to you. No one else knows me well enough."
I gasp involuntarily when his hands clutch my waist.
"Scared?" he taunts.
I grit my teeth. "No. Not this time, Blaze. You know why? Because you're right, I know you well." I try to take a step away from him, and as I expected, he pulls me back, closer to his solid form.
I need to buy time, is all I can think.
"I know you well enough to not be surprised by you anymore. You may have thought me afraid all this time, but that was only because I never knew what to expect from you. You change personalities so quickly, so easily. But now, you've run out of the tricks you had stored up your sleeve. I've known you too long. You have nothing left to throw at me that I haven't already considered you're sick enough to do." I tell him all of this, hoping to provoke him and keep him talking instead of acting.
Because actions speak louder than words, and it's not pretty when he yells through his fists, or worse.
He growls a little at my words, before bringing his mouth down, close to my ear. "So you know exactly what I'm going to do to you?" he whispers, his voice both sharp and smooth as he leans in to me from behind me.
Even though my heart is pounding, I force out a pretence of a nonchalant sigh. "Oh, I don't really care anymore. But I'll guess, just to amuse you. Let's see..." His grip tightens at my not taking him seriously, and I almost let out a squeak as the pressure from his arms squeezes my ribs till it hurts. "Y-you're going t-to kill me," I stutter, as calmly as I can, stumbling over my words mostly because I'm still trying to breath as well as talk under the mercy of his constriction.
"Good guess," he murmurs against my hair. "It's so good to get you alone again. I've missed our time together. You're always so busy making eyes at that redhead."
I furrow my brows at this. He knows about Aiden. He must have been stalking me for a while. "Jealous?" I mutter.
"I don't need to be," he returns. "Because I know that you're mine. You've always been mine."
I stiffen. "No, I'm-"
But he doesn't allow me to finish, because he picks me up, bridal style yet not at all romantically, making me stop midsentence. I can see his face now, his dark brown eyes and lips set in a twisted smile.
"Put me down," I breathe, his face so close to mine that I barely remember to. But not in a good way, not the way Aiden makes me forget to breathe. This is different.
"Sorry, I kind of don't want to." He grins a cruel grin. "Because you and I have somewhere we've got to go. Together."
I frown at him. He looks away, and I follow his gaze. He's looking down, off the edge of the peak of the mountain that we stand on.
And it's then that I know what he's thinking.
"Ready?" he asks me. He knows that I know.
I start kicking, clawing at him, yelling, screaming. It's no use. There's no one out here to hear me but us. He holds onto me until I go limp, like a ragdoll in his arms. "Why?" I ask, breathlessly. "Why?"
"Because." He states, simply. "Like I said, you're mine, and I'd like to keep it that way."
Then he starts walking closer and closer to the edge. I fight back again for a little while, but he grabs my wrists with one of his hands and holds them together in a death grip that makes me cringe in pain, while he secures the rest of me with his other arm. The wind whips at my face and hair and I look above to see that the sky looks stormy and angry.
I always wanted to die on a pretty day, not an unkind, unfeeling day like this.
You don't always get what you want, do you?
I close my eyes and wait for him to jump, because I know he will. I know him, and I know he will do this thing that most others wouldn't even consider doing, killing another life along with his own.
What did I ever do for him to want this for me?
His body tenses and his knees bend as he prepares himself to leap off the mountain, with me in his cold, hard embrace.
Well, I tried. I tried and I managed to buy myself a little bit of time.
Just not enough time.