Elizabeth's pov
Now I know you're wondering what the hell I'm talking about when I say I'm a witch. When you think of the word, you probably think of an ominous, crotchety old woman looming over a bubbling cauldron, or maybe flying on a broom. Green skin, warts on noses, Sakura, pointy hats and dark robes. These things surely all come to mind. Well, I'm here to tell you I'm not all that and a bag of chips. No, I'm better.
I'm the badass kind of witch that makes unorthodox potions that turn people into talking frogs. I perform, and even create at disastrous times, spells. I'm really not sure where the whole 'magic' thing came from. Apparently I was found as a small child alongside a very large book that nobody could seem to open. After the Hokage and a team of ANBU failed to crack the thing, it was finally turned over to me. I was only six at the time and could barely write my name without putting the E backwards, which may be why the Hokage decided it was fine if I held onto it. What could I do with a book that wouldn't open?
Surprise, surprise. Those fucks underestimated me. I cracked that saucy read open easier than Naruto cracks open his mouth. And that's he story of how small, naive, innocent me got into the art of witchcraft. I could read at the time and thus ended up having to work off the photos provided, so there were a... few unpredicted casualties. They were all accidents! Besides, it wasn't ever anyone that would be particularly missed. Mostly just unfortunate trespassers who wandered into her land. Wrong place, wrong time.
Enough of that, now. Case and point: I'm a full blown witch! I know, it's a rather amazing tale. Very eventful. An added bonus is that I've gotten better now that I know how to read, so there's a lot more outlets open to me. There's parts of the book that are still blank. I remember thinking I was supposed to write my own discoveries on those pages, but I soon came to realize that was far from the case. As I age, new sections appear where there was previously nothing. It's all very intriguing. With the book one a fourth of the way filled, I'm hoping to live long enough to see it out until the end. Doubtful, but one can hope.
Me being a witch isn't common knowledge. No one knows—save for maybe Hinata, but I'm pretty sure I can recall removing that memory. It's not like I can just ask. Anyway, it wouldn't be the worst thing, people knowing. The world seems to have moved past the whole 'burning at the stake' phase, but how would I even go about revealing myself. 'Hi there! Did you know I'm a witch?' isn't a very good conversation starter. Well, it is if I want people to assume I'm insane.
I'm getting off track. Moral of the story: it would be absolute hell trying to explain. There's still no guarantee the civilians won't revert to their old ways and burn me alive anyway, which is something to consider. Who knows! Maybe my parents ditched me here to hide me from a hoard chasing them with a collection of rusty pitchforks, torches, and knives? You never know. People are unpredictable like that.
"Here you go, ma'am." I was snapped from my rampaging thoughts when the waitress of the mochi shop I was in set down a plate of the squishy delights. I could feel my heart croon at the sight. Nodding to the waitress in thanks, my gaze never strayed from the glorious gift presented to me in all its multicolored glory. A small mound of mochi was piled before me neatly, and my mouth was past watering. It was just about overflowing, which is just as disgusting as it is true. I could die now and die happy.
Grabbing a pink one, I let out a happy him as I shoved it in my mouth whole. I probably looked totally batshit as the taste of rice dough filled my mouth, along with the strawberry jelly they'd filled it with. This is proof, right here, that God exists. This is the best thing since sliced bread. A true delicacy in a world where so few exist. Can I get an amen?
As I was in the midst of worshipping the food set before me, a set of hands slammed down so hard on the table the entire thing shook. It startled me enough that I predictably began to choked to death. I looked up to glare at whoever brought this early end upon me. The sight I was met with was so horrifying, that death actually turned his back on me and walked away just so he wouldn't have to witness this.
Standing before me was none other than Rock Lee. Half the village knows who Lee is. He's the student of Might Gai—one of the scariest men I've ever met—and has a tendency to run around the village on his hands at five in the morning. For the first time in a long time, I wasn't sure how to react. Did I even try to run? No, he'd only catch me. It's too late for that now. This is the end of the line for me. I can only hope my funeral plans are up to date and all in order, because I'm not sure I'll be making it out of this one.
"Hello, my youthful flower!" Lee said loudly. Everyone in the shop naturally turned to stare. I scooted back in my seat, trying to make myself seem as small as possible. Damn me for choosing a booth seat. Less chances to escape. Again, not that he wouldn't catch me in about five seconds flat. I may be a with, but Lee is another sort of being. He's almost otherworldly, and not in a good way either. "I apologize for interrupting your meal, but I must ask!" He unfortunately continued in his spiel. All I felt was horror as he got down on one knee, somehow managing to wrangle my hand into his. I felt terror fill my very being. Bon voyage, life.
"Will you do me the honor of being my girlfriend?!" He essentially shouted. I winced at the piercing sound, blinking at his eyes, which had somehow morphed into hearts. How is something like that even biologically possible? I didn't have the words to ask. I could only helplessly open and close my mouth like an idiot in a desperate attempt to form some sort of response. Today really isn't my day, is it?
"Lee!" Lee was suddenly whacked over the head by my new lord and savior, his Hyuga teammate. A girl with two brown buns on her head also wandered over, looking sheepishly apologetic. As though I wasn't just traumatized. I pulled back my hand, wiping the flour from around my mouth from the mochi I had previously shoved in. First Sasuke, no Lee. Guys really can't get enough of me, can they?
"I apologize. Lee is a bit... odd." She deadpanned at her own understatement. "I'm Tenten, and this is my teammate, Neji Hyuga. And, well, you've met Lee. Rock Lee."
Yeah, no shit I have.
"Ella." I grumbled quietly, wishing with every fiber of my being that they'd go away. They all paused, composing themselves as they stared at me, as though I had just done something extremely noteworthy. I blinked right on back at them, wondering what the hell they were doing. Is my name a code word? Or are they just... weird? Wait, I don't even want to know. I just want to go about my day. I'm not even sure why I'm still here.
"...Are you the girl who sometimes catches on fire?" Tenten questioned when no one spoke. Lee was teetering back on the balls of his feet, looking at me with flushed cheeks. I'm not saying he's bad looking or anything, even if he does look a bit whole-funky. He just... he's very overbearing. And the running around on his hands thing is quite concerning all things considered. Who in their right mind gets up at the ungodly hour of five in the morning just to run around on their hands? It's a whole new category of weird.
"Sure am!" I made the executive decision to abandon the rest of my mochi, swinging my legs out of the booth and popping up to my feet. They all took a slight step back, as though they'd been told I'd spontaneously combust. Which I might, but we won't think too hard on that fact, even with how concerning it is. I just need to get out of here. Surely Lee's teammates will understand my urge to flee and hold him back long enough for me to get away. They can pay for the food. I'm not about this life.
"Wait!" Lee exclaimed, but it was too late. I was sprinting, blurting out a half-assed goodbye and bursting through the door so fast I almost knocked the thing right off its hinges with every ounce of immense strength I only seem to possess in moments of panic. And right now? Definitely a moment of panic! You have no idea how fast I booked it out of there. I can deal with a lot. I have literal gargoyles living in my house! They do my bills! But this? Rock Lee? I could never. I don't need a teenager with a bowl cut proposing to me in a mochi shop.
I shook my head, heading back to the academy. I'm sure it's almost time for our sensei to retrieve us. Ah, how time flies when you're being confronted by someone who wants to go out with you just because you give off 'youthful flower' vibes. Naw, dawg. If I'm getting married, they better be legit, and they better be able to put up with my absolute bullshit. I fully expect to die alone. Modern literature has set my standards too high, and now I expect unrealistic things from men and women alike.
Cold air washed over me as I entered the academy. It was only when I got through those doors that I stopped running, leaning over to catch my breath as the air chilled all the sweat that had begun to form on my skin. I shivered as goosebumps formed on my arms. This is fine. Totally fine. It's not like my day is in shambles and I'd rather just go home and sleep or anything! That's definitely not what I'm feeling right now.
The classroom was full of my chattering peers when I arrived. I slipped through the door, trying to be as stealthy as possible as everyone excitedly talked with one another. I inched towards my seat. Successfully, only a few people glanced my way, but it was no big deal. They looked away immediately and didn't dare try to engage me in conversation. I was a sweaty mess and my bun looked more like a giant tangle than an actual hairdo, and I was pretty sure my face was bright red from the running.
Nobody was paying attention to me. A goal. But me being me, of course, I tripped. On a completely flat surface. Now that takes skill, my friends. Falling wouldn't have been an issue! I would've winced, gotten up, and continued on my way. Ignored the snickers that would come from the witnesses. But no, oh no. When I fell, a ball of fucking magic shot out of my hand and set my desk on fire. As in smoked, red, hot fire. Like my hair, but ten times deadlier.
My eyes widened in shock, and I leapt up from my place on the ground. My head whipped left and right. Nobody seemed to huge fucking fire beginning to spread across the back row. Most of the kids were near the front, sitting with friends and chattering. I panicked. Like anyone did, I spewed out the latin words "unda caligarum", which roughly translates to 'water hose'. Water immediately spewed from my hands nearly uncontrollably, splashing loudly on the desks. And yet everyone still failed to notice. Isn't that lovely?
Smoke and steam wafted right out the open windows. I rushed to my desk, sliding into my seat and trying to pretend nothing happened as I frantically tried to help wave the fumes out. A few people had glanced back, but the lack of fire had them looking away before they could note how foggy the air was. A few were commenting on the smell, but it wasn't that uncommon. We're ninja! Fire jutsu exists, and the academy always does demonstrations. I continued to flap my hands like a woman gone mad, meeting Sasuke's curious eyes and freezing. His eyebrows were raised.
I let my hands fall onto my lap, sweating even more than before and feeling very tired. The Uchiha looked at lightly-scorched desks, and then back at her. I stared back, arms crossed over my chest and my hair a frizzy mess. Sasuke being my teammate, he was bound to witness some real fuck shit eventually, but I had really hoped I'd get to choose what fuck shit it was. Instead, he'd witnessed me in curb my own, accidental act of arson.
I decided to shrug at him. His glare told me everything I needed to know. Being teammates with him wasn't going to be easy, but honestly, I was okay with that. After seeing me almost burn down the academy, maybe'd he'd feel less inclined to try and corner me just to try intimidating me into submission. I don't think his ego will ever take a step back. At this point, all I can really do is hope for the best, and accept that I will most definitely be dying at some point in the near future.