As Dr. Octavius had expected, a large crowd was already assembled when they arrived. The group split up into numerous subgroups and Zeke, Max, and Sarah found themselves positioned almost directly in front of the main entryway.
City Hall was a towering yellow building with numerous peaks and spires. The exterior was covered with hundreds of large mechanical clocks each emitting a loud ticking sound. In the middle of it all was an enormous clock painted in a kaleidoscopic swirl. Zeke estimated it was about the size of a football field. On the hour clattering bells rang, fireworks shot off, and an elderly dwarf emerged on a platform, danced a little jig, then sat down in a tiny wooden chair, instantly falling asleep, catching a catnap until an hour later when he would be woken up to perform the ritual again.
"That was quite the spectacle, eh Sarah?" Zeke said as he turned to talk to her. "Holy mother of god!" he shouted as he jumped backwards.
Around the time the fireworks were going off she had transformed into a rat once again. "What?," she hissed raspily.
"Look, I don't know what you did with Sarah, you filthy rodent, but she'd better be okay or you'll be sorry!"
"Relax, it's me," she said holding her paws up in the air.
"What?" Zeke asked incredulously. "You're honestly suggesting you're Sarah?"
"It's true," Max said. "While you were off traipsing around in the jungle Sarah started turning into a rat at irregular intervals."
"I swear I'll never understand this place," Zeke said as he continued to stare at her oddly.
Suddenly a familiar pink blob stormed up to them. "Zeke! Who was that girl you were just talking to?"
"Huh?" Zeke said as he turned around. "Oh, hi, Percy."
"The girl! Where is she?"
"What girl?" Zeke asked innocently.
"Don't play dumb with me! I saw you a minute ago standing next to a girl that matched the description of Octavius' niece, now where did she go?"
"There's no girl here," Zeke said. "Just me and some disgusting rat."
"Ahem," Max cleared his throat loudly.
"Oh yeah, and some disgusting toad, too."
Percival stared at him angrily. "Trevor Mastodon is very unhappy with your performance. You've failed badly in your mission. You do remember the penalty we discussed regarding your failure?"
"How am I supposed to succeed when you're sending me on a wild goose chase? Sarah's not even in the city! I told you that before! But no, you just keep seeing phantom look-alikes everywhere. I mean, you're the one who claims you just saw her standing here a minute ago, you tell me where she is."
"I know what I saw," Percival fumed.
"Sure," Zeke said. "Are you suggesting she just changed her appearance instantaneously? That's highly unlikely."
Percival continued to stare at him menacingly for a few minutes. "All right. You're off the hook for now. But if we find out Sarah has been here, you're dead meat." He stormed off angrily.
"Jeez, what an asshole," Max said.
"Thanks for covering for me, Zeke," Sarah grinned at him with her sharp rat teeth.
"Yeah, well, you know," Zeke blushed. "I couldn't just let them kill you."
"That's really sweet," she said rubbing his arm.
"Yeah, um, it's kind of weird that you're a rat," Zeke said with a mixture of repulsion and embarrassment at the realization that Max had revealed his crush to her.
Sarah pulled away suddenly. "Does that bother you?" she asked with a hurt tone coming through even with her rat voice.
"No, not really," Zeke said hastily. "It's just... weird. You know, because I'm not really used to it. It doesn't bother me though. I know you're still the same person underneath the exterior. That's why I couldn't turn you over to Trevor Mastodon."
"That's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in quite awhile," Sarah said.
"I'm glad we're all sharing such a touching moment," Max interrupted. "But I think something's going on up there."
The crowd came to an abrupt silence as the massive doorway to City Hall swung slowly open. An old, hunched over, gray wolf came waddling out slowly, wheeling a trash can and pushing a broom.
"Never mind," Max said. "Looks like it's just the janitor."
"Hey!" a booming friendly voice suddenly came from behind them. "Look who it is! How are you two doing?"
Max and Zeke turned around to see a large tiger smiling at them.
"Do I know you?" Max asked icily.
"I'm sorry, I don't think we were properly introduced the other day. I'm Benjamin. Listen, I can't thank you guys enough for helping me out with that circle dilemma."
"Oh yes, the shape-making tiger. Yes, I remember you," Max said. "Well, glad we could be of assistance, although it's all in a day's work."
"Thanks to you two, I've moved on to three-dimensional shapes!" Benjamin said excitedly. "Check out this sphere I made. I'm pretty proud of it." He pulled out a small round globe-like object.
"It's a sphere, all right," Zeke said. "Good for you, Benjamin."
"It's hollow in the middle!" Benjamin said. "I've been storing my sunflower seeds in it!"
"That's truly amazing," Max said disinterestedly.
"I've even rigged up a locking mechanism, so nobody can steal my sunflower seeds. There are thieves everywhere, you know."
"Look, I'm very happy for you, but we're in the middle of a very important mission right now, so could you show us your handiwork later?" Max asked.
"Oh, I'm sorry," Benjamin said abashedly. "I didn't mean to get in the way. Hey, look! Trevor Mastodon's coming out with the mayor!"
They all turned to look at the stage and sure enough Trevor Mastodon was approaching a podium accompanied by a nervous looking fat pig in a black Hawaiian shirt and a top hat. Trevor Mastodon walked up to the podium with a cocky smile pasted across his face. He picked up a circular microphone and began to speak.
"Greetings my fellow citizens of Quartzwater City. I'm glad you could all make it out today as we have some important announcements to make. But first the mayor has something he'd like to say, don't you?"
The pig looked at Trevor Mastodon and his lips quivered as if he were about to say something, but then he looked downwards dejectedly and took the microphone. "I'd like to announce," he paused and gulped. "I'm resigning my position, effective immediately."
A huge gasp spread throughout the crowd.
Trevor Mastodon shoved the mayor roughly aside and took back the microphone. "You heard the man. In the absence of our elected official I will be stepping into the governing role. Needless to say there are going to be some major changes in policy."
"Hey, you want some sunflower seeds?" Benjamin whispered to Zeke as he waved the sphere under his nose. Apparently they were coated in some sort of spicy seasoning as Zeke suddenly felt a tickle in his nose. Before he could stop himself he let out a reverberating sneeze.
Somewhere off to the right he heard Timmy shout out "That's the signal! Come on!"
On stage Trevor Mastodon paused in surprise as two small dogs wielding shopping bags charged the stage. Timmy and Cuthbert didn't seem to realize that they were the only ones attacking as they valiantly headed straight towards Trevor Mastodon.
"Viva le revolution, bitch!" Timmy shouted as he pulled out his gun. Unfortunately the trigger jammed and nothing happened. Undaunted, he tossed it aside and lunged for Trevor Mastodon's leg. Trevor Mastodon slapped him aside easily and he flew backwards across the stage, collapsing in a heap in the corner.
Cuthbert, in the meantime, had pulled his gun out, but in the heat of all the excitement managed to point it backwards. He pulled the trigger and the boxing glove shot out, smacking him in the face. His eyes rolled backwards and he fell over unconscious.
"That was very odd," Trevor Mastodon mumbled, momentarily unsettled by the unexpected attack. "Anyway as the new ruler of this city, my first order of business is to announce that the tourist bureau has been shut down permanently. Furthermore, all tourists are hereby banned from the city and will be expelled on sight, violently if need be. Also I'll be doubling all taxes. As the ruling despot I feel I should be afforded the finest luxuries. Failure to comply with these new laws will result in imprisonment and possibly death."
An uneasy murmur spread throughout the crowd at this latest proclamation.
"Thank you for your attention. That is all." Trevor Mastodon turned around and started to walk back towards the entrance to City Hall.
In the meantime, Dr. Octavius had managed to work his way to the front and center of the crowd. He turned to face the masses and sneezed loudly. Instantly a group of creatures wielding shopping bags stormed the stage from all sides. Trevor Mastodon whirled back around in surprise to see a large angry polar bear charging at him.
Bobby's fist connected with his face and he went sailing backwards, slamming into the doorway of City Hall.
It took a few moments for Trevor Mastodon's goons to respond to the attack, but soon they were engaged in full-fledged hand-to-hand combat.
Sarah, Zeke, and Max swept onto the stage with everyone else and were soon separated from each other. Zeke could hear his heart pounding in his ears as he stumbled around in the confusion of the melee. Off to his left he saw Daedalus smacking the heads of a pair of lizards together. Bobby was near the podium swatting aside assailants as if they were flies.
Some sort of warthog creature smacked Sarah in the back of her head and she found herself suddenly changed back to human form.
"Well, well, well," the warthog licked its lips. "What have we here? You're a delicious-looking piece of meat, aren't you?"
Sarah coolly removed her gun from the shopping bag and pointed it between the warthog's eyes.
"Come now, my pretty," the warthog grinned at her with a mouth full of crooked teeth. "A dainty little thing like you wouldn't know how to use something like that. How about you just put the gun aside and give me a little kiss."
"Kiss this," Sarah said as she squeezed the trigger. The boxing glove shot out and smacked the warthog square in the nose. It stumbled backwards and then fell over. Sarah examined it cautiously, but it was clearly out cold.
Max, in the meantime, found himself beset by a squid with antlers. He hopped around spastically dodging blows.
"Hold still, you stupid frog!" it shouted as it narrowly missed him again.
"Oh, now you've gone and done it," Max said, first ducking to the right and then leaping over a flailing tentacle. "First of all, I'm a toad! An angry toad with a whole world of hurt in store for you!" He hopped back several feet and then removed his gun from the shopping bag.
Unfortunately, the squid managed to wrap a tentacle around the barrel and yanked it out of Max's hands.
"No need to worry," Max said as he held up his hands in a karate chop pose and paced slowly backwards. "I'm a skilled master in numerous forms of martial arts." He dodged quickly to the right to avoid a swinging tentacle and found himself with his back to the podium. He maneuvered his way behind it, using the podium as a barrier between himself and the squid.
"That won't do you any good," the squid sneered as it wrapped several tentacles around the podium and flung it aside.
Unexpectedly Max found himself still gripping the microphone in his hand. In a move of sheer desperation, he swung the microphone as hard as he could at the squid's head. The thump of the impact reverberated through the loudspeakers accompanied by a squeal of feedback as the squid collapsed into an unconscious heap.
"Don't fuck with a pissed off toad," Max leaned over and shouted into its face. He dusted off his hands in a self-satisfied manner and rifled through the squid's pockets in hopes it might have a fat wad of floss.
Zeke had managed to avoid actual combat for the first several minutes but suddenly found himself set upon by a familiar pink blob.
"So, Zeke," Percival said angrily. "Your true colors come out after all! I knew we should have killed you instantly and had done with it. Well, no mind, I'll take pleasure in gutting you now myself."
Zeke pulled out his gun and pulled the trigger. The boxing glove shot straight through Percival's gelatinous body with a splatter but didn't appear to have done any harm.
"Fool!" Percival laughed at him. "You can't hurt me with blunt objects."
Zeke tossed the gun aside and gazed around desperately. He appeared to be trapped in a corner. The blob approached him menacingly and continued to laugh. Figuring he had nothing to lose, Zeke grabbed a hold of the blob's head with both hands and began to squeeze as hard as he could.
"What are you doing?" Percival asked. A slightly worried tone seemed to have entered his voice.
Zeke ignored him and continued to squeeze. Cold, disgusting slime oozed between his fingers but he refused to let go. A large pink bubble began to inflate above Zeke's hands and expanded rapidly as he squeezed tighter. It abruptly popped with a loud bang, not unlike a balloon. Pink slime splattered everywhere as Percival seemed to have exploded entirely. Zeke was soaked but he couldn't help but smile at his victory.
Heartened by the show of resistance, other creatures in the crowd who hadn't been part of the original conspiracy began to join the battle onstage. Dr. Octavius felt a sense of elation at what appeared to be a winning battle. He stood back from the combat in an effort to keep tabs on the battle as a whole. He noticed Trevor Mastodon standing back up near the doorway to City Hall and rubbing his face as he also surveyed the situation. He spoke into some sort of metal box and soon re-enforcements came storming out of City Hall wielding strange canisters.
Bobby was in the midst of twirling an orange dragon over his head when a baboon wielding a canister snuck up behind him and unleashed its contents. Bobby was engulfed in a cloud of thick blue smoke and instantly dropped to the ground trembling.
Daedalus, who was the other most physically imposing fighter on Octavius' side, was soon taken out by a three-toed sloth wielding a canister containing yellow smoke. He stopped fighting and began staring wistfully at the chaos around him. The sloth kicked him in the gut and he doubled over in pain. The sloth then kneed him in the face, dropping him to the floor.
The tide of the battle was quickly shifting in favor of Trevor Mastodon as more and more of his henchmen emerged carrying canisters of the colored smoke and began overwhelming their enemies.
Max stumbled out of the crowd and sidled up next to Dr. Octavius. "We're in trouble now, Doc," he panted breathlessly. "I've encountered that emotion-controlling smoke before and I'll tell ya, it's a doozy. There's no way we're going to be able to stand up to that. It's just a matter of time before he's got us all under his control."
"Hmm," Dr. Octavius pondered. "Maybe we can battle his emotional tactics with a little psychological shock of our own. Perhaps it's time I revealed my presence."
"What good's that going to do?" Max asked. "He'll either swallow you whole again or gas you with the smoke."
"Perhaps," Dr. Octavius conceded. "But he's certainly not expecting me to be alive. Our best weapon is hitting him with the unexpected. Demonstrating the failure of his earlier coup may prove unsettling to him. If nothing else, it may buy us a little time."
Dr. Octavius walked calmly through the battling throngs towards the doorway where Trevor Mastodon stood smiling evilly. He pushed his way through the crowd relatively easily until he found himself standing face to face with his nemesis.
Trevor Mastodon eyed the strange man with the large sunglasses and blue Afro who stood before him. "And just who the hell are you?" he sneered.
"Just an old friend dropping by to say hello," Dr. Octavius said as he whipped off his disguise.
"Octavius!" Trevor Mastodon shouted in obvious shock. "But that's impossible! I ate you myself!"
"Let's just say I'm a bit more resourceful than you may imagine."
"Well, it doesn't matter!" Trevor Mastodon spat. "Your little rebel army is on the verge of defeat and personally, I'll enjoy killing you even more the second time."
"If you actually can kill me," Dr. Octavius replied with a little smile. "Given your track record that doesn't seem too likely."
Trevor Mastodon frowned. "Apparently you haven't experienced the full effects of the gas we gathered from Pandora's Rocks. Allow me to demonstrate." He pulled out a canister and sprayed a small puff of purple smoke at Dr. Octavius who was immediately overcome with a laughing fit. He fell to his knees, struggling to catch his breath.
After a few minutes it wore off and he found himself laying on the ground clutching his aching sides. "Is that the best you can do?" he asked defiantly.
"I assure you I only administered a small dosage in order to give you a taste of the power I have at my disposal. I actually gave you one of the more pleasant emotions. I can also make you feel despair, paranoia, insanity, grief... you name it. And don't worry, I possess large enough quantities to keep the entire population under control for a long time."
"We'll stop you somehow," Dr. Octavius said as he stood back on his feet.
"Oh is that so?" Trevor Mastodon sneered. "I'd like to see you make rational decisions while battling a severe bout of panic!" He pulled out another canister and blasted him with a cloud of pink smoke.
Dr. Octavius felt an uncontrollable urge to flee in every direction at the same time. Instead he collapsed to the ground again and chewed on his fingernails as he whipped his eyes desperately from side to side.
Trevor Mastodon stood over him laughing maniacally. "And so the mighty Octavius has fallen! Look everyone! Look at your great leader now!"
There was a pause in the battle as both sides turned to stare at the twitchy quivering old man curled up at Trevor Mastodon's feet. After a moment his henchmen let out a loud cheer.
As for everyone else, it was as if the air had suddenly gone out of their tires. Shoulders slumped, numerous creatures fled, and there was a general air of resignation and defeat.
"Everyone involved in this little uprising will be severely punished," Trevor Mastodon snarled. "As for Octavius, I believe a slow, painful bout of torture is in order before I dismember him."
"Stay away from him!" Sarah shouted.
"Ah yes, the young niece," Trevor Mastodon smiled. "You're too late. Your uncle is done for. As for you, you can follow in his footsteps if you'd like. I'd be more than happy to torture and kill you as well. However, I'm feeling merciful. If you'd like me to spare your worthless life I may allow you to become a communal concubine for my men."
Sarah charged at him in a fit of rage but was hit with a blast of smoke before she got anywhere near him. She joined her uncle on the floor in a state of intense panic.
"Anyone else want to be a hero?" Trevor Mastodon called out.
"Not a hero," Zeke spoke up shakily. "Just a diplomat. Don't kill them. Why not let them return to Earth? Isn't that what you want? For the tourists to just go back to where they came from? Why do you have to kill them? I promise if you let us go home we'll never come back here again."
"Maybe not," Trevor Mastodon considered the matter for a moment. "But you'll tell others and they'll come here. It's much better to rid myself of the problem permanently. Besides, Octavius has been a thorn in my side for a long time now. As for you, Zeke, I seem to recall I charged you with a certain task. Now's your chance to prove your worthiness to the cause. Kill Sarah and I'll grant you full membership in my inner circle. You'll have wealth, power, women, anything you could want."
"And if I refuse?" Zeke asked.
"There's more than enough room in my torture chambers to accommodate you."
Zeke gulped as he stared at the girl he'd been nurturing a crush on for several years. He took a deep breath and was about to speak when he felt a hand grasp his arm.
"Excuse me," Max said as he pulled Zeke aside. "Can I talk to my friend in private for a moment?"
Trevor Mastodon's eyes narrowed. "You look familiar. Have we met before?"
"Uh, no," Max said hastily. "I've never even heard of you before today, oddly enough. But anyway, can I please have a few quick words?"
Trevor Mastodon sighed. "Very well. You have five minutes."
"Do you have some plan to get us out of this?" Zeke whispered eagerly.
"Yeah. Off the bitch. Take the money and run."
"What?" Zeke asked horrified.
"I mean, how well do you really know her anyway?" Max asked. "Oh sure, I know you've got your pathetic little puppy love going on, but seriously, there's lots of beautiful women out there."
"You can't honestly be suggesting that I kill Sarah," Zeke protested.
"Hey, between you and me, I like her, too," Max said. "She's got many admirable qualities, not least of which is a smokin' ass. But let's be pragmatic here. We're in a no-win situation. Trevor Mastodon may be an evil asshole, but he's holding all the cards. At least this way maybe you can overthrow him later from the inside."
"Maybe you're right," Zeke said with his eyes downcast. He turned to face Trevor Mastodon and exhaled loudly.
"Have you come to a decision?" Trevor Mastodon asked menacingly.
"I... I can't do it," Zeke said as he stared at his feet.
"Damn it!" Max groaned behind him.
"Very well. Gas him up and we'll take them all down to the torture chamber."
At this moment Dr. Octavius seemed to emerge somewhat from his state of panic. He looked up and smiled oddly. "You're forgetting one thing, Trevor."
Trevor Mastodon turned and glared at him. "And what might that be?"
"There is the small matter of a certain prophecy."
Trevor Mastodon burst out in a fit of evil laughter. "Prophecy? You believe in that mumbo-jumbo? Morton the Mystic was a quack, just like all the other prophets and fortune tellers. You actually think you're going to be saved by some sort of miracle?" He walked out to the center of the stage and looked around in all directions. "And just where, pray tell, is this precious monkey-chicken of yours that's going to save the day and lead you to victory?"
As if on cue there was a burst of noise and a large furry shape appeared suddenly in the sky directly over Trevor Mastodon's head. Gravity soon kicked in and it fell on top of him, pinning him to the ground and knocking him out in the process.
"Oops," a high-pitched voice lisped as this strange new arrival picked itself up and turned to assess its situation.