Tourist Trap

Chapter 19

Zeke woke up in some sort of dank smelly pit. He was lying on his back in what appeared to be a mixture of straw, hay, and mud. He didn't care to think about what other substances may also have been present. It was quite dark, but a single beam of light poured through some crudely constructed wooden bars that covered an opening almost directly overhead. His muscles were a little stiff, but overall he felt reasonably well. 

He suddenly became aware of some heavy breathing and an imposing dark figure pacing back and forth off to the side. "Who's there?" Zeke called out nervously. 

"So you're finally awake," a deep gruff voice replied. 

Zeke felt an involuntary chill in his bones. "Who are you? Are you my captor?" 

"No," came the reply. "I'm a prisoner like you." 

"Oh," Zeke relaxed a little bit realizing he was in the same boat with this person, whoever he was. 

"For now the question remains whether or not I should kill you." The figure stepped forth into the light revealing a large feline creature in a tattered green Hawaiian shirt with two extremely long sharp teeth extending from its mouth.  

Zeke let out a little whimper at the sight of the saber-toothed tiger. "I think not killing me is the clear choice here." 

"I don't know," the cat growled. "You do look mighty tasty. At least compared to the normal grub they toss down here." 

"I may look tasty, but I'm a particularly poisonous form of primate," Zeke said. "We humans have been known to cause all sorts of bad things to happen when eaten. Like testicular rot." 

The saber-toothed tiger eyed him warily and continued to pace back and forth. "Be that as it may, the only reason I haven't killed you already is the off chance that you may prove useful." 

"Oh, I'm useful all right. Back in high school my classmates voted me most likely to be useful to big scary cats trapped in pits. I always thought that was kind of weird, but in retrospect they seem to have been rather insightful."  

The tiger didn't say anything but continued to stare at him as it paced. The fact that it hadn't blinked once was kind of unnerving. 

"I'm Zeke, by the way," he offered. "Do you have a name?" 

"Yeah. I'm Daedalus." He made no effort to shake Zeke's hand. 

"Okay, Daedalus. Is there some way in particular you were thinking I could be of use to you?" 

"Yeah. You got any ideas on how to bust out of here?" 

Zeke exhaled loudly. "Well, it does just so happen that I'm a master escape artist and therefore much too valuable for you to kill. But I'm going to need to assess the situation a bit first. Who exactly are our captors?" 

"They're a bunch of worthless barbarian fucks," Daedalus spat. "They captured me while I was sleeping under a tree. They wouldn't have taken me if I'd been awake. I can tell you that much." 

"What do they want with us?" 

"I don't know. Bastards don't seem to be very talkative. The only time I see them is when they lower down food and water once a day." 

"Just once a day?" Zeke asked. His belly gave a little growl but he tried to ignore it. "Hmm. That may be our best opportunity for escape. When they bring food maybe we can lure the guard down here somehow and get the keys from him." 

"It's not keys that are the problem so much as getting up there." He indicated the opening over their heads. "Those wooden bars look pretty flimsy. There's no way to reach it without a ladder of some sort."