Maximillion Cesantio
Ashton Searan
The name of person that I want to kill and buried. I hate him with every cell of my body. He's the guy who always try to take Rose from me. Seeing him hugging Rose and seeing Rose so glad to meet him is just burning my heart.
I really want to be a monster at that time to kill him but I control myself so hard by keeping my mouth shut and looking away from them.
Asking about me and Rose in front of everyone is like mocking me , she picked me over him but she doesn't end up with me..
Not yet..
I don't have any appetite but I act like a girl if I just go away. That's being childish and stupid. I don't even have the mood to talk and even look at Rose because looking at her so happy meeting him making my heart burn.
I really don't have any mood seeing that Asshit guy
After we finish eating , we agree to meet at the hotel. I just kept quite and nodded with Luke's statement. We all rent a car to stroll around and I got my own. Rose is with Luke and Angel with Alex.
I think I want to go for a drive to relieve my burning heart.
"Okay let's go" Luke said and I turned to go to my car when I suddenly froze
"I'll go with Max" Rose said and that got me turn to her
"What?" Luke asked her disbelief
"I'll go with Max" She repeated
"We'll just meet you there" Angel said and Alex nodded. Luke and the Norths left first when she suddenly stand beside me looking at me. I'll be lying if I'm not happy that she want to ride with me but I still in a jealous mode. I might hurt her by my bursting emotions
First Jeremy and the second got me more crazy..
"Come on" She said and I nodded. Walking to the car and opened up her door first. She smiled to me and get inside. I walked to my side and get in. Starting the car and drive away. Turning on the GPS and following the directions
"Max" She called
"Yeah?" I asked
"Let it out" I turned to her for a moment and looked at her with a questioning eyes
"I know you're mad , let it out" She said and I don't answer her because I don't know what to answer that statement
"I'll drop you to the hotel first okay?" I said
"I'll go with you if you want to go for a drive" She stated and I shook my head
"I'll take you-"
"Just let it out Max"
"I'm not angry" I lied
"You can't lie to me , I know you more than you know" She stated angrily. Oh shit she's mad
"Rose , I can't"
"Stop there" She pointed at a small park and we can park there. Unconsiously I go there and regret as I stopped
"You're mad , you're sad , you're jealous" She stated and I just looked straight to the front , not able to look at her. She stated that but I stay silent
"You can still be yourself Max , I like when you change but holding your emotions and feelings is just.."
"I'm not mad or sad"
"I once regret for choosing you over Ashton , I even thought why do I love you that much when someone loves me more than I love you? Why do I choose you? Why do I choose you when I know trouble will come on the way? At one point I'm tired loving you and I rather pick being love by someone because I'm not the one who get hurt" She say and my heart started to hurt more as hearing that. I still look straight not wanting to look at her. The guilt is still there , buried in my heart and I may not get her back in this state.
"But when I get to think for quite a long time.. I know why I love you so much Max. There's no reason to love someone , I don't have any reason why I loved you. You just took my heart and that's it. I don't regret anything since that day. You're the best thing that happen to me and the worse thing at the same time" She continued and that got me badly. I gulped , the emotions within me start to come out one by one. This is our first propoer talk
"I know you Max , I know your positive side and I know your negative side. I love every of your flaws. I know everything about you so you can't lie to me" I closed my eyes. Everything that she says is right , everything.
"Let it out" Just by saying that , I take a really deep breath and letting out my feelings. Smack the steering wheel with full power and then closed my eyes. Holding the steering wheel and put my head there. I'm so piss , more ths piss. I even can kill someone right now
"I choose you over him Max , until forever it won't change the fact that I choose you more than him. Stop hating Ashton , I bet he's already moving on since long long time again" Oh Rose why are you so kind and just.. why do I treat you so badly? Why do I abandon you? Why didn't I love you and cherish you since I met you? Why? Why?
I don't deserve you.. not a bit
I think you deserve to be happy and I'm not the one who can make you happy. My confident just drop and just feeling not deserve her come again. I hurted her so badly , I cut her heart. Even she forgives me , the scar is still there.
I don't deserve her.. not a bit even I love her. I want her again but.. I don't deserve her
"I regret all the things that I do to you Rose , I don't deserve you a bit. You're a jewel but I'm too stupid to realise that I already got a jewel from the start. Instead cherish it.. I picked up rocks that doesn't have any value to it" I said and it's painful to say that. She doesn't answer anything and I deserve it.
"You deserve it if you learn to start cherish it Max , no matter how I try.. it still belongs to you Max. It still belong to you" That make me turn my head to her. She looked outside and suddenly she turned to me.
Our eyes lock.. we stay like that for awhile
"I love you Rose.. so much , not being able to touch you , to kiss you , to hug you is the biggest stressful thing in my life. Realising how much I love you but you're not there is hurt but I deserve it. The amount of hurt that I gave you is not equal" I said truthfully and suddenly she put her hand on my cheek caressing it.
I felt warmness start to travel around my body , we both just lookin at each other until I saw tears filling her eyes. Seeing her cry making my heart crush , knowing I'm the one who cause it makes it more worse
A tear left her eyes and when I want to wipe it , she already wipe it
"I really want to have a last chance Rose.. I really do but I don't think I have that anymore. I already ruin it.. ruin every chances that I have" I said truthfully and she smiled
"Make me fall in love with you all over again" She suddenly stated , my eyes widen.
"Show me.. make me madly fall in love with you Maximillion , show me that you've change , show me that you really want me back.. show me how much you love me" She took my hand and looking at it , I really don't know what to say that
"Can you Max?" She asked and a smile starting to appear on my face. My heart just feel warm.. so warm and so happy
"I swear Rose.. I won't make you dissapointed this time. I'll prove it to you.. I'll prove it to you how much I love you and I will do anything to get you back" I swear and I promised to myself.
"It won't be easy Max"
"I don't care.. I'll get you again Rose. I promise , I swear"