I really want to show you 'behind the scenes' of this story and give a little bit more information and shed some light on a couple of things!
How I got the storyline/the aim of HT
I wanted HT to be completely different from everything else I've ever wrote. The biggest change I made in the characters was actually the age since it meant I had so much more to think about: school, friends, family and their relationship with them, home, attitude to sexuality etc.
One thing I did want to do in this story is for it to reflect real life. Not everyone is accepting of homosexuality, some people have to look after their siblings including their parents and others face the battle of cancer. I didn't want to brush away these issues or sugarcoat things. For some people, caring, cancer, being bullied and being kicked out of their homes because of who they love is their real life.
I guess you could say it's a harsh reality. The storylines I chose to write about were to open both my mind and yours so that maybe someday you might be able to understand the tiniest bit of what someone could be going through. This helped me grow as a writer and a person because I had to really put myself in someone else's shoes and write about their emotions and thoughts about something I had never experienced before.
When it came to planning out the story all those months ago, I knew I didn't want it to be a really cliché story where it was really predictable. I don't like stories where you try and guess what happens and you're right - I like to be wary and I like my predictions to be wrong.
To try and keep HT somewhat interesting I liked to use plot twists. Either major or minor, they can affect such a lot of what happens with the storyline and what happens to the characters. No plot twists = no problems = easy lives = boring story.
A list of plot twists that I used (from what I can remember from the top of my head, anyway):
• Scarlett's cancer (to be explained later)
• Homophobia in school - when in school I found younger years are less tolerating of homosexuality, so I stuck with reality. I also just wanted to cause some trouble
• Jack's homophobic parents - some people are just brought up to believe that it's unnatural/inhumane for two people of the same sex to love each other. Also I just wanted to stir more difficulty
• Jack denying his sexuality - without Jack struggling to come to terms with being gay, there wouldn't have been much of story. His parents were the root of him not being able to accept himself, and without that thought whizzing around in his head all the time, he would've been totally okay with falling in love wither another boy for the first and that wouldn't have been interesting for you to read or for me to write (a bit more on this later)
• Jack kissing Dean then Jack rejecting him afterwards and cutting off contact - (parts seventeen and eighteen) this was probably the biggest plot twist.
I finished part seventeen with a bit of a cliffhanger by ending it with "And so I did the only thing that made sense at the time, by lifting his head and [...] pressing our lips together." I suppose it would be fair to say that it was expected of them to get together in part eighteen, but that didn't happen because I wanted to surprise you and upset you and annoy you all at one time.
Jack was still battling against himself and for a split second he was perfectly okay with what he was feeling for Dean, but during the kiss the denial side of him hits right back causing him to completely freak out. He told Dean to stay away because Jack didn't like what was happening him and thought it would all melt away if he stopped seeing Dean.
Originally, I was going to have Dean kiss Jack with Jack still freaking out after, but I thought this was too obvious, so I changed it into something kind of ironic.
Scarlett and her cancer
Any decent human being wouldn't give their six-year old character cancer, but I don't fall into that category of good people when it comes to writing. Scarlett was essential to the story, there's no way around it.
When I was first planning out the story, I knew I needed something to bring Jack and Dean together. Even though they would be friends, Dean needed to really trust Jack and they had to be able to be open with each other. Also, Dean wanted to feel like a 'normal' teenager by having friend outside the house since he was so wrapped up with his family all the time, and Jack wanted a best friend and someone to feel protective over.
So, I created Scarlett. She brought Jack and Dean together to the 'best friend stage' because if she hadn't fallen ill then Dean wouldn't have been upset and he wouldn't have cried in front of Jack (part thirteen) which broke down the last wall Dean had up and secured the bond between them.
Scarlett was like a time bomb. She wasn't meant live long, since her primary purpose was getting Jack and Dean together. I think she knew in herself that she wasn't going to grow up and see through to her adulthood, which is why she never spoke about what she wanted to be when she was older.
The signs of cancer actually start to show in part two. This is going to sound so wrong, but I did research on different cancers so I could find one where the first signs aren't so drastic and actually start of subtly.
Symptoms of Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM)
• Headaches
• Dizziness
• Vomiting
• Difficulty walking or speaking
• Drowsiness
So at first, in part two, it just seems like she's got a bug when actually it's the start of something much worse.
Her storyline was really a sub-plot, but since it was such a major thing that affected day-to-day life, it pretty much the main plot too along with what was happening with Jack and Dean.
Dean
I've always pictured Dean as a sensitive and caring person who would do anything for anyone and I wanted to get that across in his character.
When the cancer strikes in his sister, he becomes very fragile. Jack is his one and only lifeline, and he is more than thankful to have him in his life. His love for Jack is also to blame for Dean opening up to him, but he needs his support since he's not really getting it from anywhere else.
Dean's had to put up with a lot, but Jack rejecting him and pushing him away is one of the things that hurt him the most. I believe that if Dean was able to cope with Scarlett's sickness by himself, he wouldn't have let Jack back into his life, but he was vulnerable and lonely and lovesick and even though he hated to admit it, all he needed was Jack because when he was with him, he was okay. Happy, even, despite everything else going on.
As mentioned in the story, when his dad was around, he took every hit because his brother and sister were his priority and I don't think he would've ever forgiven himself if one of them got hurt. Since he was at the hands of prolonged abuse, it all came back to haunt him after his dad left.
Dean suffered from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) but since he never went to the doctor about his flashbacks, it was never diagnosed.
(NOTE: I have never suffered from PTSD, so scenes where Dean is reliving flashbacks is entirely made up from my own imagination. I have no idea what they're actually like so it was all guesswork.)
Jack
I am nothing like Jack in this story. I was never popular at school, I have a brother and a sister and I see my mum all the time. Nevertheless, I like Jack's character since he is completely different from me.
At the start, you see him as just the popular boy at school with lots of friends and girls hanging onto his every word. He's pretty much your average teenage boy, but I think writing from his point of view made him seem more interesting than what his stereotype would suggest. He is fascinated with people and just a softie with a lot of love to give.
Jack's story with figuring out and accepting his sexuality is hardly a rare story. It's the only thing I can relate to with Jack, and I know it actually took me years to come to terms with mine. I don't believe it's ever easy for anyone to just go "oh, I'm gay? Cool!" and accept it like it's the easiest thing in the world. Questioning your sexuality can overtake and consume you. I was always jumping back and forth from being okay about it to being completely in denial and so I put my own experience into Jack to try and make it more realistic.
Obviously the only thing that made it much more difficult for him was his homophobic parents. If he didn't have this problem, he probably would've come to terms with his sexuality a lot easier and quicker. He knows he can't change his parents' opinions, and even knowing this, he came out to them, and I think it was the bravest thing he could've done. (Part thirty-three)
Daniel
I absolutely adored writing from Dan's point of view. If I'm most like anyone in this story, it would be him.
I didn't really focus on him as a person much since he wasn't a major character. He's quiet, thoughtful, and talented and he is more observant than Dean thinks. I think his chapters fill in some gaps and you can see just a little bit more of the effect Jack has on Dean in a different light.
I think I regret not having his point of view more since writing in his was a pleasure. I found him to be a really interesting a character since I was in a totally different mindset and I think part twenty-seven is one of the best things I've ever wrote.
Research
I had a bunch of stuff I had to research and take notes on. Here's a list:
Glioblastoma Multiforme
• Symptoms
• Diagnosis
a) neurological exam
b) MRI scan
c) Biopsy (surgery - getting a sample of tumour)
• Treatments
a) antibiotics
b) steroids
c) anti-seizure
d) morphine
e) radiation
• Progression of cancer
a) growth of tumour
b) how the patient worsens
Effects of cancer on others
• Cancer stories written by relatives/friends point of view
Homophobia
• Why some people are homophobic
• Stories of homophobic bullying in school
Funerals
• What to do/who to contact when someone has died at home
• What happens at burial services
• What needs planning for funerals e.g. colour of flowers
Statistics
•Word count: 79,218 words
•Number of parts in Jack's P.O.V.: 17
•Number of parts in Dean's P.O.V.: 21
•Number of parts in Daniel's P.O.V.: 2
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I tried to make this as short and simple as I could but it looks a little muddled and I've probably missed quite a lot out. I congratulate you if you made it through all of this - it was a lot longer than what I had in mind!
Thanks so much for reading 'Harmless Things', it means the world :)
Any questions? Leave them in the comments!