Womens Status in Islam
1. The Value of Being Pious
[Hadith - Muslim, #3465]
'Abdullah b. 'Amr reported Allah's Messenger pbuh as saying: The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman.
2. Advice for Men
[Hadith - Muslim, #3466]
The Prophet pbuh said:
"The best among you is the one who is the best towards his wife"
Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger pbuh as saying: Woman is like a rib. When you attempt to straighten it, you would break it. And if you leave her alone you would benefit by her, and crookedness will remain in her.
A hadith like this is reported by another chain of narrators.
[Hadith - Muslim, #3468]
Abu Huraira reported Allah's Apostle pbuh as saying: He who believes in Allah and the Hereafter, if he witnesses any matter he should talk in good terms about it or keep quiet. Act kindly towards woman, for woman is created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its top. If you attempt to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, its crookedness will remain there. So act kindly towards women.
[Hadith - Muslim, #3469]
Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger pbuh as saying: A believing man should not hate a believing woman; it he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.
[Hadith - Sahih Al-Bukhari 7.117] Narrated 'Aisha, r.a.
........The eleventh one said, "My husband is Abu Zar and what is Abu Zar (i.e., what should I say about him)? He has given me many ornaments and my ears are heavily loaded with them and my arms have become fat (i.e., I have become fat). And he has pleased me, and I have become so happy that I feel proud of myself. He found me with my family who were mere owners of sheep and living in poverty, and brought me to a respected family having horses and camels and threshing and purifying grain. Whatever I say, he does not rebuke or insult me. When I sleep, I sleep till late in the morning, and when I drink water (or milk), I drink my fill."
....'Aisha then said: Allah's Apostle SAAWS said to me, "I am to you as Abu Zar was to his wife Um Zar."
3. Accusations Against a Chaste Woman
[The Noble Qur'an - An-Nur 24:23-24]
Verily, those who accuse chaste women, who never even think of anything touching their chastity and are good believers, are cursed in this life and in the Hereafter, and for them will be a great torment, --
On the Day when their tongues, their hands, and their legs or feet will bear witness against them as to what they used to do.
[Hadith - Bukhari 8:840]
Narrated Abu Huraira
The Prophet pbuh said: "Avoid the seven great destructive sins." They (the people) asked, "O Allah's Messenger! What are they?" He said,
"To join partners in worship with Allah,
to practise sorcery;
to kill the life which Allah has forbidden except for a just cause (according to Islamic law);
to eat up Riba' (usury);
to eat up the property of an orphan;
to show one's back to the enemy and fleeing from the battle-field at the time of fighting and
to accuse chaste women who never even think of anything touching their chastity and are good believers."
[Hadith - Bukhari 8:840]
Narrated Abu Huraira
Hilal bin Umaiya accused his wife before the Prophet pbuh of committing illegal sexual intercourse with Sharik bin Sahma. The Prophet pbuh said, "Produce a proof, or else you would get the legal punishment (by being lashed) on your back." Hilal said, "O Allah's Apostle! If anyone of us saw another man over his wife, would he go to search for a proof." The Prophet went on saying, "Produce a proof or else you would get the legal punishment (by being lashed) on your back." The Prophet then mentioned the narration of Lian (as in the Holy Book). (Surat-al-Nur: 24)
*the proof required is four witnesses
[The Noble Qur'an - An-Nur 24:4-9]
And those who accuse chaste women, and produce not four witnesses, flog them with eighty stripes, and reject their testimony forever, they indeed are the Fasiqun (liars, rebellious, disobedient to Allah).
Except those who repent thereafter and do righteous deeds, (for such) verily, Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
As for those who accuse their wives, but have no witnesses except themselves, let the testimony of one of them be four testimonies (i.e. testifies four times) by Allah that he is one of those who speak the truth.
And the fifth (testimony) (should be) the invoking of the Curse of Allah on him if he be of those who tell a lie (against her).
But it shall avert the punishment (of stoning to death) from her, if she bears witness four times by Allah, that he (her husband) is telling a lie.
And the fifth (testimony) should be that the Wrath ofAllah be upon her if he (her husband) speaks the truth.
4. Marriage
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #605] Narrated Ali ibn Abu Talib Transmitted by Tirmidhi.
Allah's Apostle pbuh said: Ali, there are three matters which should not be deferred: the Prayer when its time is due, the funeral as soon it is ready, and the case of a woman without a husband, when there is a suitable (spouse) for her in her class.
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #605] Narrated Aisha
The Prophet said, "The marriage which produces most blessing is that which involves least burden."
5. Mothers
The Prophet pbuh said,
"Paradise lies at the feet of your mothers."
The hadith with this wording is da'if ( a tradition that does not fit into the categories of authentic, good or dependable. It is therefore a ‘weak’ tradition),
but its meaning is contained in the hadith of Ibn Majah and al-Nasa'i that a man came to the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) and said, "O Messenger of Allah! I intend to go on a (military) expedition, but I have come to ask your advice." He said, "Is your mother alive?" He said, "Yes." He said, "Then stay with her, for the Garden is under her feet."
[This latter hadith is declared to be sahih by al-Hakim, al-Dhahabi and al-Mundhiri. --Kashf al-Khafa', no. 1078; Al-Da'ifah, no. 593]
[Hadith - Bukhari 8.2]
Narrated Abu Huraira
A man came to Allah's Apostle pbuh and said, "O Allah's Apostle! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man said. "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man further said, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man asked for the fourth time, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your father."
[Hadith - Bukhari 1:675]
Narrated 'Abdulla bin 'Abi Qatada
"My father said, "The Prophet pbuh said, 'When I stand for prayer, I intend to prolong it but on hearing the cries of a child, I cut it short, as I dislike to trouble the child's mother."
[Hadith - Bukhari 1:3:591]
Narrated Al-Mughira bin Shu'ba
The Prophet said, "Allah has forbidden for you,
(1) to be undutiful to your mother,
(2) to bury your daughters alive,
(3) to not to pay the rights of the others (e.g. charity, etc.) and
(4) to beg of men (begging).
And Allah has hated for you
(1) vain, useless talk, or that you talk too much about others,
(2) to ask too many questions, (in disputed religious matters) and
(3) to waste the wealth (by extravagance).
6. Praying in the Masjid (Mosque)
[Hadith - Bukhari 1:832]
Narrated Salim bin 'Abdullah ,also in 7:165
My father said, "The Prophet said, 'If the wife of any one of you asks permission (to go to the mosque) do not forbid her."
Note: Women are not required to attend the Masjid... in fact, it is an extra blessing to do Salat at home.However, a woman should not be denied attending the Masjid upon asking for permission, even for the night prayers.
7. Femininity
[Hadith - Bukhari 7:773]
Narrated Ibn 'Abbas
Allah's Apostle cursed those men who are in the similitude (assume the manners) of women and those women who are in the similitude (assume the manners) of men.
Tattoos, plucking eyebrows, cosmetic surgery, etc.
[Hadith - Bukhari 7:815]
Narrated 'Abdullah
Allah has cursed those women who practise tattooing and those who get themselves tattooed, and those who remove their face hairs, and those who create a space between their teeth artificially to look beautiful, and such women as change the features created by Allah. Why then should I not curse those whom the Prophet has cursed? And that is in Allah's Book, i.e. His Saying: "And whatsoever the Messenger (Muhammad ) gives you, take it, and whatsoever he forbids you, abstain (from it), and fear Allah." (59.7)
8. The Muslim Woman: Her Status in Islam
by the noble Sheikh Abdul-Azeez bin Baaz (rahimahullah)
The status of the Muslim woman in Islam is very noble and lofty one, and her effect is very great in the life of every Muslim. Indeed, the Muslim woman is the initial teacher in the building of a righteous society, provided she follows the guidance from the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Prophet.
Since adherence to the Quran and the Sunnah distances every Muslim - male or female - from being misguided in any matter.
The misguidance that the various nations suffer from, and their being deviant, does not come about except by being far away from the path of Allah - the Most High, the Most Perfect - and from what His Prophets and Messengers, may Allah's peace be upon them all, came with.
The Prophet pbuh said: "I am leaving behind me two matters, you will not go astray as long as you cling to them both, the Book of Allah and my Sunnah."
The great importance of Muslim woman's role - whether as wife, sister or daughter, and the rights that are due to her and the obligations due from her - have been explained in the purified Sunnah.
The secret of her importance lies in the tremendous burden and responsibility that is placed on her, and the difficulties that she has to shoulder - responsibilities and difficulties some, which not even a man bears.
This is why the most important obligation upon a person is to show gratitude to the mother, and kindness and good companionship with her. And in this matter, she is to be given precedence over and above the father. Allah - the most High - says:
"And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and good to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness and hardship upon hardship, and his weaning is in two years. Show gratitude and thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [Soorah Luqmaan 31:14]
Allah - the Most High - said: "And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship, and she brings him forth with hardship. And the bearing and the weaning of him is thirty months." [Soorah al-Ahqaaf 41:15]
A man came to Allah's Messenger pbuh and said: O Messenger of Allah! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me? He replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So he replied: "Your mother". The man then asked: Then who? So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother." The man then asked: then who? So he replied: "Then your father." So this necessitates that the mother is given three times the likes of kindness and good treatment then the father.
As regards to the wife, her status and her effect in making the soul tranquil and serene, has been clearly shown in the noble ayah (verse), in His - the Most High's saying:
"And from amongst His Signs is this: That He created from you wives from amongst yourselves, so that you may find serenity and tranquility in them. And He has put between you love and compassion. Indeed, in this are signs for those who reflect." [Soorah Ar-Rum 30:21]
Al-Haafidh Ibn Katheer (d.774H) - said, whilst explaining the term mawaddah means love and affection, and ar-rahmah means compassion and piety - "since a man takes the hand of a women either due to love for her, or because of compassion and piety for her, by giving to her a child from himself…"
Lets not forget the unique stance that the Prophet Mohammed's pbuh wife Khadeejah took, had a huge effect in calming and reassuring Allah's Messenger , when the angel Jibreel (Gabriel)- alayhis-salam (May Allahs peace be with him) first came to him in the cave of Hiraa.
The Prophet returned to his wife Khadeejah with the first Revelation and with this his heart trembling and beating severely, and so he said to her: "Cover me! Cover me!" So they covered him until his fear was over, after which he told Khadeejah everything that had happened, and said: 'I fear that something may happen to me." So she said to him: "Never! By Allah! Allah will never disgrace you. You keep good ties with relations, you help the poor and the destitute, you serve your guests generously and assist those who have been afflicted with calamities."
(In those days in Arabia, God was known as Allah, but the people followed polytheism and associated other Gods with Him.)
And there is no doubt also, the house in which there is kindness, gentleness, love and care, along with the correct Islamic tarbiyah (Education and cultivation) will greatly affect the man. So he will become - if Allah wills - successful in his affairs and in any matter - whether it be seeking knowledge, trading, earning a living, or other than this.
So it is Allah Alone that I ask to grant success and to guide us all to that which He loves and is pleased with. And may the prayers of peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad , and upon his Family, his companions and his followers.Ameen.
A Muslim Wife
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3095] Narrated AbuUmamah , Transmitted by Ibn Majah
The Prophet pbuh used to say, "After fear of Allah a believer gains nothing better for himself than a good wife who obeys him if he gives her a command, pleases him if he looks at her, is true to him if he adjures her to do something, and is sincere towards him regarding her person and his property if he is absent."
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3254] Narrated Anas ibn Malik
Allah's Messenger pbuh said, "When a woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of Paradise she wishes."
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi 3257]
Narrated Talq ibn Ali
Allah's Messenger pbuh said, "When a man calls his wife to satisfy his desire she must go to him even if she is occupied at the oven."
[Tirmidhi transmitted it.]
[Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi 3272]
Narrated Abu Hurayrah
When Allah's Messenger pbuh was asked which woman was best he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves."
[Nasa'i and Bayhaqi, in Shu'ab al-Iman transmitted it.]
[Jamharah Khutah al-‘Arab, 1/145]
‘Abd al-Malik (RA) said: “When ‘Awf ibn Muhallim al-Shaybani, one of the most highly respected leaders of the Arab nobility during the jahiliyyah (preislamic era) married his daughter Umm Iyas to al-Harith ibn ‘Amr al-Kindi, she was made ready to be taken to the groom, then her mother, Umamah came to advise her and said:
‘O my daughter, if it were deemed unnecessary to give you this advice because of good manners and noble descent, then it would have been unnecessary for you, because you posses these qualities, but it will serve as a reminder to those who are forgetful, and will help those who are wise.
‘O my daughter, if a woman were able to do without a husband by virtue of her father’s wealth and her need for her father, then you of all people would be most able to do without a husband, but women were created for men just as men were created for them.
‘O my daughter, you are about to leave the home in which you grew up, where you first learned to walk, to go to a place you do not know, to a companion to whom you are unfamiliar. By marrying you, he has become a master over you, so be like a servant to him, and he will become like a servant to you.
‘Take from me ten qualities, which will be a provision and a reminder for you.
‘The first and second of them are: be content in his company, and listen to and obey him, for contentment brings peace of mind, and listening to and obeying one’s husband pleases Allah.
‘The third and fourth of them are: make sure that you smell good and look good; he should not see anything ugly in you, and he should not smell anything but a pleasant smell from you. Kohl is the best kind of beautification to be found, and water is better than the rarest perfume.
‘The fifth and sixth of them are: prepare his food on time, and keep quiet when he is asleep, for raging hunger is like a burning flame, and disturbing his sleep will make him angry.
‘The seventh and eight of them are: take care of his servants (or employees) and children, and take care of his wealth, for taking care of his wealth shows that you appreciate him, and taking care of his children and servants shows good management.
‘The ninth and tenth of them are: never disclose any of his secrets, and never disobey any of his orders, for if you disclose any of his secrets you will never feel safe from his possible betrayal, and if you disobey him, his heart will be filled with hatred towards you.
‘Be careful, O my daughter, of showing joy in front of him when he is upset, and do not show sorrow in front of him when he is happy, because the former shows a lack of judgment whilst the latter will make him unhappy.
‘Show him as much honour and respect as you can, and agree with him as much as you can, so that he will enjoy your companionship and conversation.
‘Know, O my daughter, that you will not achieve what you would like to until you put his pleasure before your own, and his wishes before yours, in whatever you like and dislike. And may Allah choose what is best for you and protect you.”
Islam gives women- wife or mother a very very high status, let us respect and appreciate our role as women instead of whining about it. "The world would look more beautiful if one has a companion whom he/she loves by their side", learn to accept your spouse's nature and never expect anything from anyone but Allah.
You can give a 100% guarantee only about yourself and not others, so never think he/she will change later, they might or they may not, you only have the power to change yourself, not others.
Before you get married, ask yourself," will i still love him/her when all she/he has got will be his/her character?"
Your spouse's character is what you will eventually end up with."