Jason’s P.O.V
We were standing like that for a while; Her skinny arms around my neck and her legs around waist. I held my hands under her ass and pressed her up against the door as support.
“You make me think that you like me, but in the next second you’ll try to blow off my head!”
I closed my eyes. How could she think I would ever hurt her? Okay, maybe I had pointed a gun to head a couple of times now, but I didn’t mean it! I didn’t mean to hurt her. It’s not my fault she’s that sensitive. She’s not sensitive; you’re just fucking insane. I angrily bit my lower-lip.
I’m not fucking insane, no I wasn’t, I wasn’t!
“I’m not insane!” I spat, and furious smashed my hand into the wall. I breathed heavily and looked down at the floor. Maybe I actually am a psycho? And so what! Like, nobody in reality cares anyway. But Christine looked like she did.
“I know.” She said, or well, whispered it.
I looked up at her. That bitch hadn’t even known me for 2 weeks. She knew shit. But I couldn’t say it. I wanted to slap her, telling her that she shouldn’t even think about to say that she knew me.
I sighed, “You don’t know me, Christine. You know my name that’s all.”
She looked a little disappointed, but this was true. We didn’t know anything at all about each other life, and girly shit like that.
“But you want me to know you? Don’t you?” She looked at my lips, then into my eyes.
A mixed feeling between that I wanted to smash her down into the floor and kiss her at the same time, whelmed up in my body. What the fuck is this? Normally a person would never dare to say something like ‘they wanted to know me blablabla’. Nobody wants to know me! People hate me! Didn’t she get that point?
“If you didn’t wanted me to know you, you probably wouldn’t hold me in you arms.” She whispered. My blood was boiling right now. I felt so powerless. Is this what you call wanting to take care, of somebody? Ugh! I hate this feeling. But yet, it felt like I had something to fight for. Protect. Oh fuck, I’m turning into a gay ass bitch.
Carefully, she laid her hand on my cheek. She smiled insecure at me, slowly caressing my skin with her thumb.
Was that girl a witch? Did she just know what to do when I was about to explode? I don’t know. And I might never find out. But no matter what, I loved it.
I lowly groaned, leaning down my head, resting it against her shoulder.
She giggled a little, laying her hand in the back of my neck. It sent chills down my back as she began to play with my hair. I never wanted this feeling to stop. Never.
But then psycho-Jason whelmed up in me once again.
“Maybe I’m just doing this, because I just want to fuck you.” I mumbled into her neck.
Even though this wasn’t true, I just had to push it as far as I could. The adrenaline is what keeps psycho-Jason alive.
Actually, I had expected she would push me away. Yell at me. Tell me that I needed some fucking help, and then I’ll shoot her. But she didn’t.
“No, you’re not.” She sighed, slowing down her touches a bit. She didn’t stopped, but I can tell you she had gotten hurt.
I lifted up my head, looking wondering at her.
“And how do you know that?” I tried once again. Stop yourself, Jason! You might loose her, something inside of me screamed. My lips were only inches from touching hers.
“Because,” She started. Was that a smile playing along her lips?
“You’re not insane.”
I was flattered and surprised at the same time.
Damn, that bitch just owned me.
But our laugher was quickly cut off. I knew she couldn’t control it any longer, neither could I.
Taking her hand in mine, I ran it through my hair. Closing my eyes, I groaned by the pleasurable feeling.
She smiled at me, doing as I mentally had asked her. She elegant ran her hand through my hair, and repeated over and over again.
Then she stopped. Ran her hand a last time through my hair, before laying both of her hands in the back of my neck. She pushed me forward. She wanted this. She really did! She felt like I did.
She gently pushed me forward till my lips were millimeters from hers. I stroke my lips against hers, feeling her breath on my lips. She dug her hands up in my hair, and placed a light kiss on my chin, before she returned back to my mouth.
“Baby…” I whispered low-voiced against her lips.
“Oh Jason.” She replied with a moan, before I crashed my lips to hers.
The hot boiling feeling inside of me started once again. But this time it wasn’t anger. It was a sweet, ‘never wanting it to stop’ feeling. Was this love? It was like drugs: You know this might end horrible but you just can’t help yourself. I couldn’t control it any longer. I had to touch her. I had to make sure she knew I could give her all she could ask for. As long as she just did the same.
Christine’s P.O.V
I lowly moaned into his mouth as we started to make out. The tip of his tongue gently met mine, before he slid his tongue fully into my mouth. I roughly pulled in his hair, not wanting him to stop. To never stop.
I couldn’t believe this. I was in the arms of Jason McCann, french-kissing him.
All the thoughts were flying around in my head, but something inside me blocked it all. All that matters were him and me.
I threw my head back, nuzzling Jason in the back of his neck, as his lips attacked the skin on my neck.
He inhaled my sweet fragrance, lightly sucking my skin. He squeezed my ass, making me gasp.
“Jason…” I whispered into his ear. I could feel him smirk into the kisses he placed. But still. Even though he tried to keep up with this ‘Imma a motherfucking bad boy’, I knew he really tried to be romantic right now. He just wasn’t really trained to be gentle and caring. Why? I don’t know. But even though it might hurt to admit, I knew one thing;
“I think I love you.” Boom. The bomb exploded. Or did it? I don’t even know why I said it. I just couldn’t hold I back any longer.
He looked up at me. Not with his angry eyes, no, he looked terrified.
There was a flash of lighting in his eyes. Like something he in matters of seconds, something changed about him. He became more violent. He was getting confused. Fuck, I thought to myself, I’m creating a monster.
And I maybe did.
He pulled me in tight, holding his hand on the back of my head, and pressed it down into his shoulder.
Kicking the door open, he rushed upstairs –still with me in his arms. In our rush past the kitchen, my eyes met Gabriel’s for a second. But I just hid my face down in Jason’s shoulder, holding myself as tight as possible to him. He opened that door –the last on right side, before locking it behind us. I looked around the room, before I was thrown at a bed. A king size, I guess. It was enormous.
The walls were painted white, and one giant window was letting all the daylight in. Or well, afternoon light.
Jason crawled on top of me and that was when all alarms signals started to blink.
All of sudden he got all gentle once again. I swear this kid is bipolar. Or well, he wasn’t really a boy. More like a young man.
He leaned down, kissing my nose. I stroke his cheek, and he immediately relaxed some more. But not enough. Bad Jason took over.
He sat up on my thighs, looking hungrily down at my body. My heart began to beat faster for every second that passed. This was horrible. I was just lying there, and couldn’t do shit. Or well, I could do something. But I’m not sure that even if I screamed, he wouldn’t be able to stop.
“Jason,” I said calmed, even though I was shaking like mad inside.
He didn’t looked like he heard me, even though his eyes were locked into mine.
“Don’t do it this way.” I begged desperately. He was physical stronger than me, so I knew he could do this if he wanted. But something inside of me kept telling me he wouldn’t. But could I trust that voice? I hope so.
Jason’s P.O.V
“Don’t do it this way.” She was begging. Shaking. Scared. And it was my entire fault. I looked down at my hands. What the hell I was doing? I was about to hurt the only one who ever made me feel things like these. Made me feel loved.
“FUCK!” I screamed, jumping up from the bed. I furious threw a glass; there was standing on my dresser, into the wall. It shattered into thousand of pieces. Pretty much how I felt inside right now; broken. I didn’t knew what to do. Should I apologize? Run? Kill her? Kill myself?
I sat down at the bed, covering my face with my hands. I refused to face reality.
But I was confronted with it only minutes after.
Christine carefully laid a hand on my shoulder. I sighed, letting her know, that she could touch me without being yelled at.
I looked down at the floor. The worn wood floor, that always creaks when you walk around.
“Did you mean what you said before?” I asked her, lifting up my head and looking into the wall.
Christine’s P.O.V
I sat down beside him.
I stared at him, as he was looking into the wall. He had a beautiful profile.
“The ‘I love you’ part?” I quietly asked him.
He nodded his head, turning to face me.
“Yes.”
He looked surprised at me. I cautious tried to send him a smile, which he contrary to expectations returned.
I giggled at his cheeky smile, which made him clear out his throat. I hadn’t seen this side of Jason before.
“You have a cute smile.” He chuckled, studying me.
I blushed, wrinkling my nose.
With a sigh he laid back down at the bed.
“Isn’t this crazy?” He giggled, looking up in the ceiling.
“What?” I said, lying down beside him.
“We don’t even know each other.” He lifted his eyebrows, looking over at me.
All of sudden, I felt dirty and slutty. It felt so wrong to kiss with someone who actually was a complete stranger. But it didn’t looked like Jason felt the same way.
“I like good girls, who can be bad just for me.” He smiled, pulling my into his embrace.
“You think I’m bad?” I asked innocent, not knowing if I should take it as a compliment.
“Girls who kisses strangers are bad.” He smirked, winking at me.
“You haven’t seen me as bad yet.” I smirked back. Head shot, bitch. If he thinks this was how bad I could be, oh God I feel sorry for him.
“You wanna be bad just for me?” He whispered sexually.
“Sorry, I’m not your personal wh0re.” I giggled, getting up from the bed.
“Where are you going?” Jason asked disappointed, looking over at me.
“Home. I have to be ready for later,” I sighed, looking at the girl in the mirror.
“I’m going out with some girlfriends.” I added, as I saw his confused face expression.
“Do you want me to drive you home?” I turned around to look at him.
“Jason McCann, did you just say something nice?” I joked, laughing of how cute he suddenly turned.
“Don’t get to used to it.” He chuckled, getting up from bed, walking over to the door. Unlocking in he waited for me to come.
I could feel his eyes on my ass, as we walked downstairs, so I made sure to swing a little extra with my hips.
I smiled to the other boys, as we walked into the living room. I packed down my stuff, their eyes still watching me.
“Sorry that we didn’t made that much homework, Gabriel!” I said, as I walked out to the front door.
“It’s cool, see you soon Christine.” He chuckled in reply. I waved goodbye to the other guys, before a hand was laid on my ass. I looked up to see Jason.
“Ready to go?” He whispered, the other boys couldn’t see us from here.
“Yeah.” I smiled back.
“Good.” He smirked, squeezing my ass, making me gasp.
“Jason McCann you naughty boy.” I winked at him, gently slapping his chest.
Laughing, he rolled his eyes, as we walked out of the front door.
Walking down to the motorbikes, I waited for Jason to come. But he wasn’t. I turned to look where he was. He was still standing at the small staircase, that lead of to the front door, nervously looking around. I furrowed my eyebrows. Jason never acted like that.
“Lets take the car.” He said tensed, walking over to the black Audi.
Closing the car door, I fasten the seatbelt. Jason didn’t.
I was prepared to one of these awkward situations, where you’re just sitting there, feeling like the air is eating all of your words. But it wasn’t awkward. No, actually it was very comfortable. We drove for a while in silence before I decided to break the ice.
“Jason?” I turned myself to look at him.
“Mm?” He mumbled, his eyes trailed to the traffic light.
“Tell me about yourself.” First after I’ve said that, I heard how corny it sounded. Mentally slapping myself across the face, Jason looked over at me. He was smiling. Not exaggerated. Just a simple cute smile.
“What do you want to know?” He chuckled, looking back at the road.
I shrugged my shoulders, trying of this “I-don’t-care” attitude, but it wasn’t really me. It felt wrong. I was too carrying, to pretend like I wasn’t.
“How old are you?” I asked sounding like a little girl, who was trying to flirt with the new boy in school.
“19,” He slightly smiled.
“Turning 20 in March.”
Woah, he’s an older boy. I’ve always wanted an older boyfriend. Then he could protect me. But actually I didn’t need a boy for that. I could protect myself.
“Wha-what about you?” He stuttered.
“I’m 17.” I sighed, not having it as my intention to make him feel uncomfortable.
“Aw, that’s cute.” He chuckled, smiling to himself.
I slapped his arm. It was covered up with tattoos.
“Ey, what the hell. Good girls don’t hit.” He said lecturing, a smile playing along his lips.
“Don’t talk to me like I’m 7 years old.” I mumbled annoyed.
“I’m not. I can legally bang you so it fine.” I froze. He said it like it was the most naturally thing in the world. But I couldn’t help but smile.
“Good girls won’t bang with bad boys.” I smirked reserved. He could forget everything about getting this kitty. But a part of me liked the thought of him, naked and on top of me.
“But bad boys will always want the good girls.” He said, smiling at me.
I wanted to throw myself in his arms already. Ugh, that smile. I couldn’t take it.
I kind of wanted to ask what he did for a living. But I already knew? Or did I?
“How did you meet the other boys?” I asked him, looking down at my dark blue nail polish.
“We just met each other.” He suddenly stopped smiling, looking back at the road.
“How?” I tried again. Maybe I should just have stopped there. Maybe I should have seen the signs that he wasn’t answering me? It doesn’t matter now. I did it anyway.
“Are you parents living around here?” I asked quietly, not knowing he would get so angry about it. He totally lost it.
“Can’t you fucking stop your annoying questions?” He angrily spat.
It felt like someone just have punched me right in the stomach.
“Why are you suddenly so angry, huh?” I asked hurt. His mood changed faster than when I was on my period.
“Didn’t I just told you to shut up, bitch?” It felt like someone ripped out my heart and smashed it to the ground. I was so stupid. How was it possible that I had been in love with such an idiot?
“Stop the car, please.” I said with clenched teeth. I had to pull myself together before I would start crying. Why was I so sensitive?
I looked over at him. He ignored me. The anger was boiling inside of me. Who did he think he was?
“STOP THAT FUCKING CAR RIGHT NOW.” I yelled at him. He brake sharply making me fly a little forward. Unblocking my self, I opened the door. There was about 3 minutes walk home from here. But it didn’t really mattered. 3 minutes, 3 hours, 3 years. Just as long as I got away from him.
“Thanks for the drive, dickhead.” I regretted immediately that I had been so childish, to call him that. I slammed the door shut, and began walking away. I actually thought he would had yelled back at me. Threatened me. But he didn’t. I was so disgusted by myself. Had I really kissed that boy? I closed my eyes angrily. Whatever.