Four days.
Four days since I told Ryan.
Four days since the last time I talked to him.
I think we can't find the right words to say.
I was going to message him on snap, and you know how you can see if the person your chatting is on, like hat little blue dot? Every time I opened his name it was there, some times it would Bob up and down meaning he's writing and I would wait, but nothing.
And it irritated me.
Like I don't know why, I can't find anything to say to him. It could be a simple 'Hi' but no me and my stupid brain don't work like that.
After I read his letters, I cried until I couldnt cry anymore.
In them, he wrote how sorry he was, how he had feelings for me. Then it would switch to daily things like what he did, how school was going, sports, vacations he even got into his first kiss.
I know you probably wouldn't want me telling you this, but I had my first kiss today. It was Matt's 15th birthday...it was Savannah. I just feel like I should tell you.
And you know theres like a part of me that's like okay? But I don't know what the other part of me is saying.
Schools gone by, I've taken the bus and haven't gone over for dinner. I still talk and hang with group in school it's just Ryan and I don't conversate.
And I believe Savannah is thinking this might be her chance to take Ryan. She hasn't left his side once.
She's like a leech.
Right now I'm watching as she rubs on Ryan's arms, and laughs at everything he says.
Do guys actually like that? Like if something isn't funny to me I'm going to tell you to try again.
We're in lunch, and I'm sitting between Kayla and Quin. They are talking about having a sleepover tomorrow.
"We can get movies, and I'll buy some popcorn!" Kayla beams.
"You and your popcorn."Quin laughs.
"I just really love it. I might open a popcorn shop one day." Kayla smiles.
I look around the table Kyle is deep into his Physics homework, while Matthew is having a conversation with two of his friends who joined our table, I believe their names are Bret and Liam. But it's weird, I think he's looking at me.
I follow his gaze which beside me.
He's staring at Kayla.
Ohh.
Matthew and Kayla?
He used to make fun of Kayla so bad, but not as bad as he did to me.
I wonder if he always liked her, you know the saying 'guys are mean to the girls they like'.
I think that saying is complete bullshit.
If a guy likes me, don't be a dick.
"I'm going to snack line. Wanna go Quin?" Kayla says getting up.
"Sure." Quin says getting up.
"Wait, I'll go with you. I want to by a gatorade." Matthew says standing up.
"Mattu, Wil you buy me a water?" Savannah asks looking at Matt with puppy eyes.
"Sorry, only have 5 dollars left need it for afterschool." Matt says turning and following Quin and Kayla.
"I'm so thirsty." Savannah whines.
"Well, your Daddy puts money in yo ur account every week, which you never touch. Why dont you walk to the snack line and get one?" Kyle says with out looking up.
"Whats your problem?" Savannah snaps.
"Nothing, just stop complaining." Kyle's says now looking up.
Savannah stares at him for a moment's the rolls her eyes.
"Whatever." She says then stomps off.
Matthews two friends go, leaving me, Ryan and Kyle alone at the table.
Not wanting it to be awkward I look in my phone.
As I'm looking through snapshat, my notification goes off signaling I have a message..
Ryan (Teddy):Hey
Me: lol hi
Ryan: did you read the letters?
Me:yes I did
Ryan (Teddy): I wrote another one, if you would like to read it.
Me: I'd love to.
I look up from my phone and Ryan is smiling. He nods.
Then the others return.
"Guys, want to come tonight? We can just chill and up order some pizza?" Matthew asks looking around the table.
"Sure." Kayla says with a smile making Matthew nod but turn a bit pink.
Aw.
Everyone else agrees then they look at me.
"You coming Mary?" Quin say nudging me.
"Sure why not." I say and everyone cheers except Savannah.
▫ ▫ ▫
"I'm going to tell the others tonight."
I'm on the phone with Caleb, which is routine. I call him everyday once I finish my homework.
"How do you think they'll react?" Caleb asks.
"I dont know. I think Matthew be like lost for words and Savannah might be a bitch about it." I say as begin getting ready for Matthews.
I'm putting on a pair of ripped jeans, this sick new black, read and white tie dye long sleeve I got and I'll wear it with my black converse.
My hair, I'm not changing. It's up in a pontyail.
"Well if they get upset at first, they have a right to. But don't let them beat you down about it." Caleb says.
"Your right, well I should get going. You going out with the guys tonight?" I ask standing walking out of my room.
"Yeah, probably going out somewhere. I have to hop in shower. Call me when you get home, okay?"
"Okay, bye."
"Bye Mary Grace."
After we hang up, I let my mom and Charles know that I'm leaving, and walk out door.
I decide to walk, since it's not that far, and no can make a plan on how I let them know I'm Mary Grace.
15 minutes later, with no plan I arrive to Matthews.
As I'm about to knock on door headlight circle behind me.
I Turn to see Ryan's truck.
Ryan gets out of his car,.followed by someone in the Passenger seat.
Savannah.
Figures.
I Turn to be faced with an open door, with Matt's dad look at me.
"Here for Matt?" He asks in a flat tone.
I nod.
"basement. Tell Matt pizza will be here soon." Then he walks away.
Okay then..
I walk down stairs to hear yelling.
"Go! Go! Go!"
"Get him!"
Jumping up and down is Kyle and Quin yelling at the t.v.
It's the Cardinals vs Vikings.
"Let go! Not in my house!" Quin screams jumping on Kyle's back.
"Oh shut up. They got lucky. We're coming for you at third quarter." Kyle smirks sitting back with Quin still in his back, so now he's leaning in her.
Goals.
I sit on the recliner beside them, across on the other couch is Kayla and Matthew in a conversation.
Kayla is laughing at everything Matthew says making him smile like a child.
Cute.
"The party is here!" Coming from the bottom of the steps appears Savannah followed by Ryan.
"Time to go." I hear Quin whispernmaking Kyle snicker.
Savannah takes a seat on the floor and Ryan follows in suit but his eyes locked on me.
I turn my focus to tv.
"Oh, Matt pizza should be here soon." I say looking at Matt.
"Okay great. " he says giving me a smile.
I don't think he'll keep that smile for long once I tell them.
Speaking of, I need to do it.
It's eating me up.
We watch the game for a while when the pizza is brought down by Matt's dad.
We all get some then return back to our spots.
30 minutes go by everyone is having small talk.
I get up to throw my plate away and pour myself a drink.
As I'm standing there pouring my drink someone hits my shoulder.
I turn to see Savannah acting like she didn't just hit me.
I roll my eyes and I make my way back to everyone.
Instead of sitting back down I st and in Front of the t.v. in Front of everyone.
"Girl move." Quin shouts shooing me off.
"I have something to tell you guys." I say turning the tv off.
Everyone groans.
I look at Ryan who looks confused, I nod and his eyes get big.
He jumps up and gets really close to my face.
"You dont have to do this." He says lowly.
"Yes I do." I whisper back looking into his eyes.
"Are you guys like dating or something? If so i called it." Matt says raising his hand.
I let out a nervous laugh, and Ryan moves to my side.
"We're not dating." I say and look at Ryan is stoned face.
"That's good." Savannah smirks.
I ignore her and look at everyone else.
"I have a confession actually." I say fiddling with my fingers at my sides.
Then I feel a warm hand grab mine.
Ryan's.
I take a deep breath.
"I'm not who I say I am. Well actually I am, it's just you guys don't know the full me." I say.
"Wait so are you like Hannah Montana?" Quin chuckles.
Kyle shushed her.
"You guys know me as Just Mary. But I'm not Just Mary." I say looking at Matt.
He's head is tilted and he trying to comprehend what I'm saying.
"I'm actually Mary Grace Kosak."
Everyone gets quiet.
Kayla stands up and walks to me. She looks into my eyes and smiles.
"I called it! You owe me a box of donuts Quin." She shouts pulling me into a tight embrace.
She surprises me at first, but then I hug her back.
Quin and Kyle stand up and walk over to me.
Kyle has a blank stare before reaching his hand out to me.
"Nice to meet you again Mary Grace." He smirks.
I shake his hand.
They are taking this better then I thought.
I look over to Matt who is just sitting there looking at me.
I turn my gaze to Savannah who is red as a tomatoe, with anger.
"Are you fucking kidding me? You guys are welcoming her back with open arms. After she lied to us? All of us?" Savannah shouts standing up.
Quin takes a step forward with her hand raised.
"Technically she didn't lie to me, i didn't know her." She says.
"Relax Savannah it's not that big of a deal." Ryan says.
"Are you serious Ryan? This bitch walks in here thinking she can lie to us and you say to relax? I cant belive you guys right now." She shouts.
She then takes a step towards me.
"You must think your hot shit right now huh? Had all of us wrapped around your finger right? You didn't fit in then, you think losing weight would make you fit in now?" She says with a smirk.
"Savannah! What is wrong with you?" Ryan says his voice becoming very scary.
"Ryan! What is wrong with you? Out of all peope, you should be the most hurt! She lied to us." Savannah shouts back.
"At first I was, but she had a good reason for it. She expected us to be the same bratty kids we were back then. She expected for all of u to have the same reaction like your having now." He says.
"So that's it? She can just waltz in here and take everything back?"
"Take what back?" I say confused.
"My friends. My life."
I laugh.
I laugh right in her face, whi ch was probably not the right thing but this girl is delusional.
All of a sudden I am showered with punch.
This female just dumped her drink on me.
I'm then grabbed by my was it and pulled away. Up the stairs, and out the door.
🔸 🔸 🔸
Updated!
Part two coming soon!
-daaprincess