i feel like my writing is so overused and repetitive lol sorry i suck. also since this is an ava chapter i put my gorgeous and cute bean asami for the gif choice. she's one of my favourite face claims
chapter eighteen; old faces
Michael took a bite of his ham and cheese sandwich, chewing loudly and licking his fingers before he finished the distasteful scene with a long slurp from his blue raspberry slushie, retracing everything that Ava had said to him back over in his head.
"Woah, woah. He threw up after seeing her? That's...Yikes," He said with disbelief, cleaning his fingers with a napkin, brushing the crumbs off his lap.
Ava huffed. It was her lunch break and since their boss, Dewey, was too busy smoking pot in his office and jerking off to Natalie Portman as Queen Amidala in Star Wars to care about actual jobs, Michael decided that he would tag along as well. It felt like years since she had last seen her bleach blonde co-worker since everything in her life had felt so hectic. She confided in Michael with her problems, ranting endlessly about her feelings and the situation that happened beforehand precisely four days ago.
She had faith that Michael, seeing as they were somewhat friends and he seemed like a funny guy with similar interests, would help her in her crisis or, spare some advice. Michael did neither. She was more than glad that he had listened, because he truly was a good guy, he was just a little insensitive and, to put it nicely, dense on what other people wanted and/or felt. Why is it the attractive ones happen to be so clueless? Often, she wanted to smack the sense into him with hopes that, maybe that way, she'd knock all the hair dye out and salvage little of what was left of his common sense.
"Mikey, this isn't funny. I'm serious." She had been so frantic that she hadn't even taken one bite out of her usual lunch—a poppy seed bagel with cream cheese—and she scarcely took sips from her bottle of water.
He burped before apologizing. "Whew, sorry. Okay so what's the problem again?"
Ava rolled her eyes so far she thought they would fall out of their sockets. Letting out a sigh, she spoke slowly, as if Michael was a five year old (which, by maturity, he technically was). "I. Already. Told. You. Everything."
"I know, but I was distracted by the glorious delicacy in front of me," he defended, referring to his sandwich.
Ava groaned. She had already explained everything to him the second she got on her break and he followed like a stray cat. The events replayed in her mind like a movie she didn't want to see, The Tragic Story of Luke and Ava. Replaying it in her head was like seeing a heartache on the big screen and it made her feel even worse.
When her and Luke were approached by the Delilah girl (who knew Luke well, by the looks of it), Luke blanched. He was completely different. He was sweating like a pig and he looked like he was going to be sick, glancing over his shoulder as though he was searching for a way out. She remembered the pain that spread over his face and how he sounded like he was close to crying whenever he tried to speak.
"Yeah, Luke! It's me. I know I look different, but that's what exercising does. How are you?" Delilah stated casually, chuckling. She seemed shy and slightly awkward.
"Good, and you?" He responded hesitantly. He had a bad look on his face, like he had just heard something he wasn't supposed to. Something that broke his heart.
"Went to school. Studied nursing, I'm a waitress on the side," she answered shrugging, "It's been a while since I've seen you."
"Yeah. I never thought I would see you again," he gulped, shakily letting out a breath, "When, since when—have you always been in the city?"
"Oh, no. You know me, Lukey," she teased, causing Ava to grimace and tighten her grip around Luke's hand. "I just moved back a couple days ago. I'm working at a couple places here with my friend. How are you? I really hope you're okay."
Luke didn't respond, besides a meaningless shrug and a fake grin. He looked like he wanted to cry and that his world had just come crashing down.
He seemed hurt, extremely hurt. And because of that, Ava immediately disliked this girl. Anyone who could've caused such a heart wrenching reaction must've done something terrible. The tension in the atmosphere made her want to claw her way out to breathe in fresh air. Rivetingly, Delilah's green eyes flashed to Ava, who seemed like a deer in headlights compared to the boy next to her. Ava wanted to protect Luke at all costs.
"Hi! I'm Delilah," she introduced, giving a little wave, showing off her manicured fingertips. Ava hated her for being so beautiful. "I'm an old friend of Luke's."
"Ava." She said, setting her steely gaze elsewhere, noticing how Luke began to shake with anxiety.
"Well, I've got to get going! I would love to hear more from you, Luke. My number is the same, so call me, I miss you. And it was nice to meet you Ava," Delilah said, walking away on the crosswalk and gesturing goodbye, but something told Ava that she was hiding something.
Luke's past obviously involved her and he wasn't going to talk about it from the traumatized look on his face. He grabbed his stomach, lurched forward, and vomitted. Tears sprang out of his eyes when he regained his composure and he wiped his mouth, heaving each intake of oxygen. He soon became a blubbering mess. He couldn't get a single word out, let alone a complete sentence, and before Ava knew it, Luke was sprinting away from her, pushing past people.
Her head pounded. She didn't like thinking about the vulnerability that showed on Luke that day. It was the most emotional that she had ever seen him and it was like he was about to collapse. He had changed so suddenly and drastically because of one old face and it scared Ava. She didn't even care that he left her alone to her own devices and stranded her. She just wanted to know if he was okay. He didn't respond to any of her texts, any calls, any voicemails. According to Calum and Ashton, he had locked himself in his room and cried his eyes out, not leaving since.
She wanted to know more, she wanted to understand Luke's situation and comfort him. But she couldn't. Because she didn't know how, or what was going on. She had tried to visit him, but to no avail. It was like Luke was completely shutting her off, completely shutting himself off from the outside world. She still had no real idea who this Delilah was and why she had such a negative impact on Luke. She was left in the dark. Four days with no contact of someone she would usually spend entire weeks with.
Michael bit his lip. "I'm sorry. I'm not good at being empathic. I don't really know how to deal with these things."
Ava shook her head and faked a warm smile to hide how jittery she was. "It's okay, Mikey. Thanks for listening anyway."
He shook his head, drumming his fingers on his knee. "No I want to help. Okay, so let's see. Luke is your friend-person-thing, right?"
Ava nodded instantly, without thought. "Yes, of course. He's my best friend."
"You kiss your best friends? Wow, remind me to hang out with you more," Michael said, shocked. He had known every thing that happened between Luke and Ava and because being Ava, worried and tired, didn't know what else to do or how else to stop. "Okay, anyways, not the point. The point is, you care about him. That's pretty obvious. But just prove to him how much your guys' friendship means to you. And talk to him."
"First, we didn't technically kiss. It was accidental. And I've tried talking to him—"
"Let me finish, you Japanese string bean!" He stated, causing her to silence and for him to be able to continue Mainly she was shocked that he even knew her ethnicity, or at least got it accurate. She muttered something insulting in Japanese just then, just to further prove his point before completely silencing once more. "Thank you. And anyways, I mean really talk to him. Like try to get him to open up slowly, if he's ready. And try to cheer him up with some grandeur gesture. Get him a gift."
"This sounds like a plot to a fanfiction, Mikey. You're verging over cliché and unrealistic," she warned, thinking about the plan.
"It's worth a shot, Ava. If you really care about him, it's worth it," Michael advised and she wondered how, in the span of a minute or less, he had done a whole turn and listened to his wise side. She sighed.
If this were a fanfiction, everything would work out. Luke would immediately let her back in and they'd fight off the rules of the world and live happily ever after.
But that wasn't how real life worked. In real life, Luke was still going to continue to mourn and it would take a good amount of time to until he voluntarily allowed himself to be more open. In real life, there aren't many happy endings.
And it petrified Ava, it made her afraid, because she didn't want to lose Luke. Losing Luke would be the worst thing that could happen to her, though it seemed exaggerated. Normally, she wasn't one who would pine for a boy, but he wasn't just a boy who happened to be attractive and a good guy—he was her best friend. And best friends are supposed to be there for each other. They're supposed to support one another. Losing him would mean losing someone special in her life and she didn't want that.
More importantly, she didn't want Luke to lose himself.
All this time, she had seen many parts to Luke. He was just beginning to loosen up more and become comfortable with talking about his life. When it all came crashing down Luke was the type of person who, if their building is destroyed, they might not try to fix it. Instead, they'll start and build a completely other building that didn't have much effort put into it at all. Basically, he was the type of person who would differ greatly from the person he was before he was hurt. He would leave and avoid the problem rather than deal with it. That's what he did. Fight or flight. And when he flew, it wouldn't be uncommon that he would lose himself—lost in some other person because he didn't know what else to do.
He had been one way this entire time with Ava and she didn't want that to slip out of her fingertips, not if she could do anything to stop it. She couldn't "fix" Luke, but if he needed her help, she was absolutely going to give it to him. She was going to help him rebuild himself, but he needed to want it. She was smart enough to know that you can't call people broken and romanticize the idea of trying to glue them back together—that's not how it worked. It was so much more complicated and people didn't complete people.
Because you can't repair them. The best you can do is love them.
And that's what Ava intended to do, because she thought she knew Luke and she knew that he has to come around eventually. If she truly knew Luke, she would figure this dilemma out and pick him back up so he can continue living. If she truly knew Luke, she should've known what to do.
But she didn't, and perhaps that terrified her most of all.
Maybe she didn't know Luke. Maybe she never really knew him at all.
•••
I'm sorry. I've got to say. Writing this chapter was a bit tough because I didn't how to express enough of the emotions without revealing too much or becoming redundant. The whole story is about to take a turn and some of the chapters will be shorter, like this one.
Writer's block, my good friend, seems to be coming for dinner more often so I struggled to find the words to correctly make this chapter a good chapter. Hopefully, you still liked it.
As you can see in this chapter, I input so MANY important things about people and relationships and I really think they're important in order for everything to remain healthy. There will be drama, unfortunately, and the chapters will be a little more angsty and sad from now on and it may take a while before the carefree, funny chapters make their comeback. And Michael is finally back, you're welcome. Also I wanted to input Ava's ethnicity since her faceclaim is a woman of colour who is Japanese and I realized that I don't mention her ethnicity much and I wanted to stop myself from unintentionally erasing her culture, so from this point on, there will be a lot more mention of her ethnicity. I, myself, am not Japanese however and if one of you would like to explain your heritage or customs with me so I can get more accurate information, that would be amazing.
—What's your overall opinion on what you've read so far? Pretend that I'm not writing a book, just express your honest opinion on how the scenes played out in your head and how you feel about the people in it.
—How do you think Ava's reaction played out into all of this? How her mindset helped or made things more complicated? (Not necessarily just for Luke, because believe it or not, she can think for herself.)
—Which problem do you think will be sorted out first? Dealing with Delilah, Ava's Family Fiasco, or Losing Luke? (Yes, I tried my best with alliterations.)
—How do you feel about Luke and how he so badly was impacted? Do you think he will change? Why or why not? (This sounds like a question on my tests, I'm sorry.)
—How do you think Ava will help out? Do you think she will have more breakdowns of her own?
—How do you like the book so far?
That's all I have now. It's 6 AM and I have been thinking about what to write since midnight. I have school which sucks, but hopefully I will try and update more often. Thanks for the support :-)