Josh groaned as his alarm buzzed incessantly by his ear. He stretched out his arm shutting it off before attempting to roll over to the other side of the bed. He didn’t know why they insisted he get up so damn early in the morning for an evening wedding. It’s not like he was the groom. Or anything more than just another stupid guest here to witness Harry and Giovanna cooing over each other. Probably no one would notice if he wasn’t there considering how many people Gio’s dad had invited. When you could buy and sell England the guest list always got really long.
Josh pulled on his arm realizing that there was a heavy weight on it. He finally pried his sleep coated eyes open to see that somehow in the night he had ended up with Faith curled by his side. She looked peaceful in her sleep tucked up against his chest. He should wake her up, but he didn’t want to. Some insane part of his heart wanted to keep her right there snuggled up to his chest breathing softly as she dreamed. Oh dear Lord he needed to get his head back in shape. He shook her trying to pull his arm loose aggressively.
“Oh,” Faith moaned still half asleep. “Mmmm…Hazza you feel so good.” Hazza? Oh that was it! He sat up launching her off his chest. Her surprise at the movement forced her to fall hard off the bed and he smiled triumphantly.
“The name is Josh,” he grumbled crossing his arms over his t-shirt clad chest.
“Ouch,” Faith groaned sitting up and holding her back from her spot on the floor next to the bed. “Why the hell am I on the floor? And why are you spouting your name? Do you need to remind yourself every morning?”
“N—No,” Josh fumbled realizing he never seemed to have the upper hand with this woman. “I just—you were dreaming about somebody.” He blushed like a little schoolgirl. Why was he so embarrassed? She was the one having inappropriate dreams about his soon to be married friend. He felt the anger rise back up in him. “Harry is engaged you know.”
“Oh God,” Faith moaned standing up and still rubbing at her lower back. “I guess I had the Harry dream again. Sorry. At least I didn’t have the Zayn dream. That one tends to get a little explicit according to Phil. Something about overzealous moans.” She chuckled not a sense of embarrassment in sight. How could she not be upset in the slightest that he had overheard her?
“So what? You a Zayn girl then if Harry is taken?” Josh asked.
“I care about all of them,” Faith replied walking to the mirror and inspecting herself for bruises from her fall off the bed. “But I’m a fan. We all know that they aren’t going to get together with someone like me.” Josh suddenly missed her crazy self-confidence.
“Why not? Giovanna is a fan, and she is marrying Harry.” Josh didn’t know why he suddenly wanted to have this conversation with her.
“I’m not Gio,” she replied again rubbing at her lower back. “I’m not some high class socialite. I’m just me. Average, forgettable me who will just be a vague recollection to them after this weekend is over.”
“Don’t say that about yourself,” he admonished standing and walking up behind her placing his hands over her own and lightly rubbing her sore lower back. “You aren’t average or forgettable. Once you leave this weekend I think they will all miss you. Me most of all.”
They stood there in silence neither one knowing how to respond. Had he really just said that? Was she really warm and tingly all over thinking about what he just said? She felt an unfamiliar flush rush through her where his hands sat at her lower back.
“I—I should get ready for the day,” she stuttered pulling away in shock. “W—what’s the schedule?”
“Um, we are being split up for guy and girl stuff for the wedding prep I think. If you want I can get you out of it. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“It’s fine. The girls are very nice,” she explained looking through her meager bag and biting her lip.
“Is something wrong?” Josh asked walking closer. Faith closed her eyes silently begging her heart to slow down.
“I—I never thought I would get this far. I guess I don’t really have a wedding quality dress in this bag,“ she laughed nervously. “Maybe I can find something at the gift shop.”
“But you have to join the girls for spa treatments.”
“I’m not really a spa girl,” she replied pulling at her hair. “I’m sure they would understand.”
“Go,” Josh replied grabbing his wallet and one of the room keys. “I will be back with everything you need for the wedding tonight.”
“Josh you really don’t have to do that. Maybe I should just leave, and you can tell everyone I’m just a loser you had to cut loose.”
“Never,” he replied pulling her close and gently kissing the top of her head. “You could never be a loser. You’re too special. Just go enjoy the spa day. I’m sure one of the girls will be here soon to pry and pick you up. I’ll make sure to get you what you need for tonight.” Faith watched in shock as Josh made his way out of the room wondering if he knew what his touch and his words did to her. And wondering just when their deal had become all too real?
**********************************
“Then get this one,” Zayn grumbled throwing another dress at Josh. Josh sighed hanging the dress back up.
“That’s not the dress Zayn. It has to be perfect,” Josh grumbled at his unwilling friend. “Black would just wash her out. She’s more colorful than that. I want to find a dress to match her personality.”
“When did you become a girl?” Zayn asked raising an eyebrow. Zayn had had a long night being forced to watch his friends in love and then going to bed all alone. He was still pissed that Josh had hidden this amazing girlfriend from him all this time. He had thought they were close enough to share anything. Zayn did his best to ignore the voice at the back of his mind reminding him that he had told no one about Mari, but that had been her decision. Not his.
“Who pissed in your cornflakes?” Josh shot back as he flipped through the racks of dresses. “Why are you so upset about life in general today? It’s a great day. Harry and Gio are getting married.”
“And last night you were just as grumpy as I am,” Zayn shot back. “Since when did you decide life was all puppies and kittens and rainbows?” Zayn took a deep breath. “It’s Faith right? She’s the one isn’t she? You went and fell in love and now I’m the last idiot standing all alone.” Josh looked over at his friend who was angrily pulling at the sleeve of a dress.
“Zayn what’s going on?” he asked softly.
“It’s nothing.”
“Don’t give me that shit,” Josh replied ignoring the dresses to focus on his friend. “What is going on? You have been hiding phone calls from us. And I heard you arguing with that Mari person about her dumping you.” Zayn’s eyes grew wide. “What are you hiding from us? From me?”
“Y—you heard my phone calls?” Zayn stuttered. Josh recalled Zayn’s reaction after that phone call and winced. Maybe he should have kept his stupid mouth shut.
“Fine, you don’t have to tell me anything,” Josh said. “It’s your secret to keep, but I’m not rubbing Faith in your face. It’s more complicated than that.”
“Complicated how?” Zayn asked grateful to leave his own personal business behind. Josh tapped his foot unsure if he wanted to share all the details with Zayn, but maybe it would get Zayn to open up as well.
“Faith isn’t my girlfriend,” Josh breathed out.
“She isn’t? But you two—“
“She never was. She’s just some crazy fan who fell through the air duct in my room. I was going to call security, but then she promised to leave and Joanie showed up at the door and asked if we were dating and it all just snowballed and it’s just a mess!” Zayn’s smile stretched from cheek to cheek on his face before he burst out in laughter. “Damn it! Stop laughing!”
“This is hilarious!” Zayn chuckled even harder. “You whine at the others that the stories of how they meet are right out of a fan fiction and a bird just falls into your lap from the air duct? How more ridiculous can this story get?”
“We have a deal where she pretends to be my girlfriend for this weekend so you all would let up on me,” Josh blushed. “And I think I’m starting to have feelings for her.”
“Damn Josh,” Zayn snickered. “It’s like you have hit every cliché in the book. Let me guess. She’s a big fan of yours too?”
“No,” Josh replied crossing his arms and frowning. “She’s a Harry girl. And then she said she also liked you and well all the other guys minus me.”
“Oh this is rich! What else?” Josh grit his teeth reminding himself that if he told the truth maybe Zayn would do the same.
“She makes fun of me for all the photos I take of myself with my shirt off.” Zayn laughed so hard he fell into a rack of dresses. Josh merely glared.
“This is too adorable for words!” Zayn chuckled fixing the dress rack and standing up straight. “That explains why we are here picking out a dress for her tonight. She obviously has nothing packed since she fell through your air vent.” Josh continued to glare. “But why are you so obsessed with the right dress?”
“I just want her to feel beautiful. This morning she was looking at herself in the mirror and seemed unhappy with what she saw. I don’t want her to feel like that ever.”
“Wow. You love her.”
“What?!? I never said that. I just don’t want her to feel bad about herself.”
“Josh we have been here for two hours already while you have turned down every dress in the store because you have to find the perfect dress to make her feel better about herself. Is that something you would do for someone who is just a friend?”
“Maybe.”
“Try no Josh. You wouldn’t do any of this if you didn’t care about her. You would have already sent her packing off to security the first night she was here. I guess now there is only one thing to do.”
“Find a dress?” Josh asked back to perusing the racks for the perfect one. He had just touched his hand on what had to be the dream dress when Zayn responded making him choke on the air around him.
“You have to find out if she is in love with you too!”
*****************************************
Josh and Zayn made it back to the lodge an hour later carrying a large dress box. Josh had insisted that the store wrap it up lavishly which had made Zayn giggle even more. Despite his pleas Josh had resisted Zayn’s many ideas to test how Faith might feel about him. It appeared Josh wanted nothing more than to enjoy the weekend and push down any feelings he might have started to grow for the beautiful girl who literally fell into his arms. Zayn did his best to not laugh when Josh’s eyes lit up as Faith entered the lodge lobby wearing nothing but her bathrobe.
“Josh!” Faith called out trying to tell her ridiculous heart to stop beating so much when she saw him. “You’re back! What’s in the box?”
“A surprise for later,” Josh said handing the box to Zayn so he could place his hands on her waist and pull her closer. “Have you been having fun with the girls at the spa?”
“More like I’ve been tortured,” Faith said rolling her eyes. Josh smiled pulling her out the edge of the back door where the workers had begun to set up for the wedding that evening. They stood at the end of the carpet runner that would serve as the wedding aisle for the bride to walk down to her groom. “They made me get my legs waxed.”
“Sounds painful,” Josh agreed with a soft laugh. “I thought spa days are all about pampering.”
“Usually, but I think I’m being punished. The other girls keep asking me about how we met and stuff, but I won’t tell them anything. I keep saying we met at a bar and just knew it was meant to be, but they want details which I don’t have,” Faith pouted. Josh didn’t think she could get any cuter until she flashed him that pout.
“I will talk to them,” Josh assured her looking away so she wouldn’t see him blush. He didn’t need her thinking the same thing Zayn did; that he had a crush on her or something. He didn’t. He just couldn’t catch his breath around her was all. He took in the incredibly pink wedding scenery in front of them. “Wow. This place is crazy huh?”
“I think it’s beautiful,” Faith replied. “Gio said Harry planned most of it picking out her favorite things.”
“Harry picked out all this pink?!?”
“It’s one of Gio’s favorite colors. He picked out everything with her in mind.”
“How cheesy. Don’t you think?” Faith shook her head smiling up at him as if he was her entire world. “You don’t?”
“When you’re in love I don’t think there is anything cheesy about it.” Josh blushed chagrined by her statement.
“Well not love, but all this,” he said indicating the setup occurring around him. “If you are so in love why do you need to announce it to everyone? Flowers die, cards are just paper, and chocolates just make people fat. What’s the point of all this cheesy romantic crap?” Faith smiled at him finally understanding Josh Devine for the very first time ever.
“It’s not the flowers, the cards, or the chocolates that are the point Josh. It’s the intention.”
“I don’t follow.”
“Has anyone ever given you something small and insignificant to anyone else but you?” Josh thought back to the first set of drumsticks his parents had ever placed in his little hands. They had been the most amazing thing he had ever been given. He still had them tucked in his suitcase everywhere he went. They were a reminder of how much he had succeeded thanks to that small gift. “I can tell by the smile on your face that you have.”
“I—I still don’t see what this has to do with all this cheesy, romantic stuff.”
“That person gave that small item to you with the intention of showing you just one small, infinitesimal part of how much they love you. That small token will never encompass their entire love for you, but it is a tiny part of their heart that you get to carry with you.”
“So you’re saying—“
“All this cheesy, romantic stuff is just Harry’s way of trying to give Giovanna all of his heart. And as long as he is on this Earth he will keep doing that. Just like the rest of your friends.” She smiled moving closer and touching his arm. “And one day I know that you will find that too.”
“How are you so sure I will find that?” Josh asked on a soft intake of breath.
“Because everyone deserves love. Some just have to wait a little longer sometimes.” It was the smile that followed her statement that set it all in motion. Josh leaned forward quickly and before Faith could process it his lips were on hers. She sighed lightly as he kissed her deeper finally pulling away a few minutes later. “W—what was that for?”
“I—I think I lo—I think I lov—“ Faith felt her heart race faster as she dreamed of hearing that special four letter word. Somehow in one short weekend she had become a bigger fan of Josh than any of the boys. The wedding was no longer important to her. The most important thing was being here with Josh. She smiled up at him waiting. “I think I lo—care a lot about you.” Faith’s smile fell.
“Oh…well I c—care about you too,” Faith stuttered out with a false smile. Josh leaned forward kissing her lightly again with a weak smile on his face.
“Okay lovebirds!” Giovanna called out yanking Faith away from Josh. “I have a wedding coming up soon. You two can resume your kissing duties later.”
“Thanks a lot Gio,” Josh replied.
“Just relax and go check on my groom,” Giovanna replied. “We aren’t quite done with Faith yet.” Faith groaned as the girls dragged her away. She prayed there wasn’t anything more to wax.
“Guys, really,” Faith pled. “I need to go shopping. I have to find a dress for tonight. I kind of forgot to pack something appropriate. I hope you understand.”
“Oh the shopping is done for you,” Amelia chirped as they pulled her into Josh’s room.
“Unca Joshie took care of it!” Joanie cried out from where she jumped on the large bed. Faith took in the large box sitting on the bed bouncing along with Joanie. It was the same box Josh had walked in with earlier.
“What’s that?” Faith breathed out softly.
“It’s your dress,” Clara replied picking up Joanie to keep her from jumping on the bed.
“It’s the cutest thing,” Martzia chimed in. “Zayn was telling all the guys how Josh was frantically searching the store for the perfect dress. He wanted one that would bring out your eyes.” Faith’s light blue eyes flashed wide open at that statement. Had he really taken that much time to pick out a dress for her? Anything would do. It’s not like she was anything special. “Go on. Open it.”
Faith walked closer and unsteadily opened the lid of the snow white dress box revealing the blue confection of a dress inside. [AN: Picture of the dress on the side.] It was perfect. It was more than she would ever need. As she lifted the dress from the box a small piece of paper fluttered down onto the bed. She carefully picked it up eager to read the note left in Josh’s scratchy handwriting.
Faith,
It’s always been your eyes. I feel like I can see the world within them. This dress doesn’t do enough justice for how beautiful you are inside and out. But I hope it brings out your eyes so everyone can see the world the way I do….through you.
You are right. You aren’t something special. You are someone special.
Love,
Drummer Boy
It took Faith mere seconds to drop the paper and the dress and run out of the room.
“Mama, where is she goin’?” Joanie asked as they watched Faith run.
“I believe she is going to thank your Uncle Josh,” Clara smiled as she rocked her daughter. “That’s what you do when you fall in love.”
“Did you thank daddy for lovin’ you?” Clara smiled down at her giggling daughter.
“Every. Single. Day,” Clara promised. “Every single day.”
***********************************
“And then he tells me ‘no Zayn, it has to bring out her eyes,’” Zayn called out making the guys laugh even harder. Josh frowned taking another long pull of his beer. Zayn had been retelling the shopping trip story for the past hour much to the entertainment of the lads.
“So did little Joshie finally find the dress of his dreams?” Louis teased.
“I’m sure Clara or Joanie have something that can bring out your eyes,” Niall snickered earning a sucker punch to the stomach from Josh. “Ow dude!”
“Just shut up,” Josh defensively replied. “Why am I getting razzed for having a girl? Why aren’t you all bugging Zayn about being the single one now?” Normally Josh would have stood up for Zayn, but he was tired of the depiction of his voice being at the pitch of a prepubescent girl.
“Zayn is Zayn,” Harry shrugged. “He’ll find someone eventually.”
“Yeah,” Liam chimed in. “Knowing Zayn he will show up one day with some girlfriend who is his perfect match. He’s all mysterious you know. Besides we are just happy for you.”
“Yeah,” Louis replied. “Now you can be a loser romantic like the rest of us. We knew you couldn’t resist love for too long.” Josh shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Finally Josh fell to the love bug!”
“It’s not like that at all!” Josh protested not wanting to be lumped in with them. He wasn’t part of some crazy love story. He could only imagine what they would say if they knew the truth. “It’s nothing special. I just had to find a good dress so she looks nice next to me. I can’t have her looking all ugly and shit.”
“Josh, you can’t be telling us you don’t like her,” Harry cut in. “We have all seen you together.”
“She’s just something to amuse myself with,” Josh replied back nonchalantly unsure why he was lying to them. “She means nothing to me. I could never love someone like her.” The silence that floated around them dampened the party spirit of the group for a few minutes. Niall changed the subject bringing back the laughter of the group and covering up the sound of one young woman’s broken sob as she raced from the edge of the room. No one saw her. No one noticed the girl who snuck out of the lodge as easily as she snuck into it.
Sometime later Joanie raced up to her father eagerly climbing on his lap and peering around the room. Niall was in the middle of telling a joke when his daughter tugged on his shirt interrupting him.
“Daddy? Where’s Faith?” Joanie asked softly looking over at Josh who sullenly drank from his beer.
“What do you mean honey?” Niall asked peering down happily at his little girl. “She’s with your mum and aunties getting ready for the big wedding.”
“Nuh uh. She came ta see Unca Joshie!”
“What did you say Jojo?” Josh asked sitting up and finally taking an interest in the group.
“She left ta thank Unca Joshie for the dwess!” All the eyes turned on Josh. Josh hadn’t left this room. If Faith wasn’t with the girls then she should be there with them.
“Shit,” Josh breathed out.
“Daddy Unca Joshie said a bad word!” Joanie cried out as Josh raced out of the room searching for Faith. Had she heard? Had he messed up everything? How could he have been so stupid?
The very last place he checked was his hotel room. When he walked in he found her dress sitting in the box the store packed it in. It had been folded carefully and a small piece of paper lay on top. At first he thought the paper held his original note to Faith. Maybe she would walk out of the bathroom any minute and thank him for the gift. Maybe she had heard nothing. His heart cracked in two and sank to his stomach as he picked up the paper reading Faith’s soft, flowing handwriting.
Dear Mr. Devine,
I apologize for taking up your time. I let the hotel staff know about the loose air duct in your room. They will send someone to fix it. While I appreciate the gift of the dress it’s obviously not meant for me. A man picks out a dress like this for someone important…someone they care about. That’s not me.
After all….I’m no one.
Faith Evans
[AN: I only have to work the day shift on Thanksgiving! And I don’t have to work Christmas Eve or Christmas Day for the first time in four years! But I did always get to wear my pajamas on Christmas to work. Hmmm….maybe I can wear them on Thanksgiving….or is that weird?]