A/N: People have been getting their exam results recently, so I thought I'd do this for the ones who didn't get the reuslts they wanted. Its okay. Grades don't define who you are in the end. I couldn't imagine any of character other than Dean that could deal with this situation right so that why I've written another with him. My next one is going to be a Moriarty imagine I think. Anyways, enjoy!
~ Kiya221B
IMAGINE THIS
It was ironic how despite all the monsters you'd faced, all those times you felt anxious or frightened fighting them on a hunt, there was a person at the moment who scared you more. Dean Winchester.
Your hands splayed like pale starfish over your stomach. A twisting feeling of dread was getting worse as time passed and it made you feel like you wanted to vomit. The fear inside you was telling your body to go weak, your mouth to go dry and your heart to ache. Truth be told, a part of you hoped that Dean wouldn't be angry at all. Maybe he'd understand. No, you thought bitterly, he's gunna kill me. You'd never liked it when Dean got angry. Unlike the younger more understanding Winchester brother, he always put the fear of death in you. If things got really bad he'd turn to violence, throwing books off the bunker's tables to the floor, kicking over chairs or even hurling lamps at the walls.
One time, you caught him stood in the mess panting heavily. He'd heard you come in and as soon as he saw you his eyes looked wild, wide and untamed. Luckily, Sam arrived seconds later only to gently push you behind him and order you to go to your room. It was so long ago. At the time, you didn't understand what he'd been so furious about. But when Kevin Tran, a good friend of yours, was no longer to be seen wandering around the bunker, that was when you understood. You all grieved separately in silence for the loss of your friend. You knew Dean would never hurt you, he told you once that once after shouting at you for accidentally spilling a drink in his beloved Impala. He was livid, and at one point he even pulled the car to the side of the road just to roar at you. That was in the first month you knew the Winchesters, when they offered to take you in. You remember how you clung to Sam's flannel from behind, sniffing and blinking away tears as Dean sighed and crouched down to your level.
You remember how he'd rubbed a hand down his face before managing to look at you with a soft expression. "Kid, I'd never hurt you." He'd said,"I may be hellish at times, but I wanna let you know that I ain't gunna hit you if I get mad. Never. You hear me?"
Thinking about that moment made the sickening dread inside your stomach settle a little. But the thought of actually telling him about how you'd failed was still just as awful. Honestly, you knew you were making this out to be something bigger inside your head than you meant to. But the idea of telling Dean how you'd failed the huge Maths exam you'd revised months for was just plain dizzying. In a split second, you decided there was one person you could talk to first. You knew that Sam would be more understanding. Maybe he'd help you.
Pushing yourself off your bed, your bare feet touched the cold floor. As you left your bedroom and walked down the corridor, you hands only clung tighter to you stomach. They twisted at your top, a ACDC shirt that you'd stolen from Dean. The scent of him was still in the fabric. It was like after-shave and leather. You entered the main room of the bunker, the area where you did most of your lore re-search for cases with Sam and Dean. Just as you thought, Sam was sat at the middle table with his head in a book. Various old papers and books surrounded him, his laptop open at the side with the lamp at the centre of the table lit also, illuminating his features. Upon hearing you enter, Sam glanced up with a warm smile. This settled your stomach a little more and you exhaled slowly. "Hey, Y/N." He greeted, lowering his book as you took a seat opposite him. "I thought you were watching Lord of the Rings. Did the hobbits get too boring for you?"
You allowed yourself to pout at his teasing. "No. Sam and Frodo will never be boring." Sam raised an eyebrow at your fidgeting. "So, why you here? You'd normally kill one of us if we interrupted one of your movie sessions."
"True." You sighed, looking down at your hands. Sam frowned, his forehead creasing a little in concern. He leaned forward and set his book aside before asking gently,"Hey, are you alright? You seem a bit off."
Glancing up to him, you bit down on your lip before saying quietly,"Where's Dean?"
"In the garage working on Baby, why?"
You could hear your heart beat in your ears and it took you a few moments to then ask,"Promise you won't say anything to him?"
Sam's eyes narrowed just the slightest. Luckily, he saw how worried you were and softened when you gave him a shaky look. "Depends. What's wrong, Y/N?"
You swallowed thickly to get rid of the lump in your throat. "It's about my exam. Y'know the one I spent ages revising for?"
"Yeah. What about it? Wait, don't you get your results back today?" As you glanced to him, you saw how kind his brown eyes were so you nodded. You ran a hand through your hair and gritted you teeth. "It's not good, Sam. Ah, damn. Dean is gunna tear into me! He's going to kill me!" The exam you'd been revising for was not only important to you but the brothers too. It was important to you that you got an education, something normal to keep your bizarre life just the slightest bit stable. It especially meant a lot to Dean. He wanted you to do well in school and if possible get a job with your grades so that you wouldn't have to lead a hunter's life like he did. This was a no discussion topic. You'd tried arguing with them both about it. You didn't want to learn, you didn't want a normal life, not after that werewolf had teared into your family. Sam and Dean were your family now and that meant you wanted to have the same life as them.
"Okay, Y/N, calm down." Sam rubbed your arm as you buried your head in your hands. "Listen, you're over-reacting. If you talk to him about it, I'm sure he'll understand. We both know you revised hard for this exam. It can't be that bad anyway." Not moving your head, you reached behind to grab the exam results letter from your shorts pocket. When your teacher gave it to you, you knew by the look on their face that the result was bad. Sam took the letter from you, still rubbing your arm as he flipped open the letter with his other hand. You peaked through his fingers and watched as his eyes scanned down the letter before landing on your final grade. You groaned in despair when his face fell. This would've look comical to anyone who'd watched this scene, but to you it was plain awful. Sam pursed his lips,"It's not...that bad."
You gave him a seriously look. "Sam, I got an F! A freaking F! Dean is definitely going to send me to hell, he'll probably even talk to Cas to see if he could take me for him!"
"Woah, calm down. Jeez, Dean wouldn't do that and you know it." Sam shook his head,"Just go talk to him about it. If things get out of hand, which they won't, just come back here."
You were on the verge of tears. "A-alright." You went to get up, but Sam held onto your arm to stop you for a moment. Giving you the letter as he let go and leaned back in his seat, Sam smiled in reassurance. "It'll be okay, Y/N. You don't need to be nervous."
Taking the letter from him and pocketing it in your shorts, you smiled wryly. "I hope so." With that, you left the main room for the garage. You could only just faintly hear the padding of your feet on the floor as you went. The pounding of your heart was way louder. It reminded you of a drum and it pounded harder the closer you got to the garage. When you finally got there, you nervously tugged on your large shirt. The sound of a radio playing could be heard as you entered and you smiled in amusement at the sight of Dean's feet sticking out from underneath the Impala as he worked. Dean hummed along to the music playing, his boots thumping on the concrete floor with the beat. You recognized the song, it was one Dean played often in Baby whenever you were on a case. Dean was actually a good singer when he was alone, somehow having other people around to hear him made him automatically awful. You stood still, listening to him murmur along to the words. Smiling, you went over to the radio and turned the music down before crossing your arms while clearing your throat.
Dean shuffled out from his place under the car, a row of straight teeth flashing when he saw you. His face was all dirty and his blonde hair tousled, but despite this you returned the grin that you managed to see through the dirt. "Hey, Kiddo." His gruff voice greeted kindly.
"Hey, Dean." You ignored the urge to roll your eyes. You hated it when he called you a kid. You were in the last year of college after all. You smiled wider watching as he reached for the tool box which was nearby. He sifted through various tools before finding the one he needed. You weren't good at fixing cars, or anything really. He'd tried to teach you about the parts of Baby's engine once but his words only went through one ear and out the other. "What you doing there?"
"Ah, just checking on the oil pan seals. Baby's been smoking blue out her tail pipe so I thought I'd just fix this oil leak before it ruins her engine." You nodded. At least you understood the last two words he said, the rest was just gibberish to you. Dean went to slid back underneath car but paused staring at you. His eyes dropped to your feet before trailing back up to your face. "Is that my shirt?"
He smirked as a deep fluster worked its way up your neck to your ears tinging them a bright pink. You pulled down the shirt over your shorts suddenly feeling very subconscious. "Uh, y-yeah. It g-got mixed up in my laundry. S-sorry."
"Nah, its fine." He waved a hand with a smile. Dean paused to give you another look down causing you blush deeper. "It suits you anyway. Keep it." As he disappeared under the car again, you swallowed and ran a hand over your head to flattened your hair. "Urm, t-thanks." You both fell into a comfortable silence, the faint rock music playing in the background. You almost didn't break the peaceful atmosphere. Unfortunately, you spoke without meaning to. "Dean, there's something I need to talk to you about."
"What?" He chuckled,"Have you finally come to admit your crush on me, kid?" Hearing you splutter, Dean laughed some more. "Don't worry, I'm only joking." You didn't reply, instead pacing around his feet anxiously. Should you just come out with it? Or ease him into it? What the hell were you going to do? Dean shuffled out from underneath Baby when he was met with silence. Seeing your worried expression, Dean tilted his head with a concerned frown. "Hey, sweetheart, what's wrong? You look like someone's died." You stopped pacing to stand in front of him. Not looking him in the eye, you looked down at your hands which were busy fidgeting with the hem of Dean's shirt. "I... got my exam results back today."
"Ah, that's great!" Dean flashed you a smile. "How'd you do?" You didn't return his smile instead staring at the floor with eyebrows furrowed. Swallowing and exhaling heavily, you finally looked up. The look on your face made Dean aware that this was serious. He sat up and leaned against Baby as he rubbed his oily hands on his jeans. "Just don't be angry with me...okay?"
"No promises." He replied instantly. Rolling your eyes, you lifted the huge shirt to get at the results letter in your shorts. Getting the wrong idea, Dean held up his hands,"Woah, I didn't think you thought I was serious. I did say I was only joking." He was smirking widely, rubbing the back of his head. You ignored the slight pinkish colour in his cheeks and glared at him with a scowl. "No, you pervert. I just wanted to give you this." You took out the letter before tossing it to his like a frisbee. Dean caught it, then stood up. He wiped his brow before rubbing his hands on his trousers before opening the letter. There was silence as he scanned the letter with a deep frown. After what seemed like forever, he spoke, "Did you slack off, Y/N?" His voice was so stern and flat now compared to his light teasing earlier.
You winced when he used your actual name. Oh, no. That meant he really wasn't happy. He always avoided using you real name if he could. Your eyes widened at his accusation. "What? No!"
Dean's green eyes narrowed. "Oh, really?"
Curling your hands into fists at your sides, you didn't bother to cover the upset on your face. "No. Listen, this is really god damn important to me. 'Course I didn't slack off!" You were hurt he'd even think that. "I swear I've been revising for months. I thought I did pretty good too, but-but-but I guess not." You looked up mentally cursing the height difference. You were on the edge of tears as he stared at you with a serious expression. "I thought it was gunna be okay, but hell- I tried okay? I really, really tried. Please, don't be angry."
"Can it, kid." Dean snapped. He used your nickname so you guessed that he wasn't that angry.
You looked to the ground before saying quietly,"Are you mad at me? I can take it again. I swear I'll try harder this time. Y-you can even lock me in my room if its takes that, just-" Sniveling, tears started to fall.
"I said, can it." Dean shook his head with a soft expression.
"I'm s-sorry. I'm just so stupid and useless." Dean rubbed his hands again before bending down slightly so he was eye-level to you. "Hey, hey now. Don't say that princess." You were still crying, your hands covering your mouth in attempt to stop the pathetic noises you made. Dean pursed his lips as he dropped the letter and brought his hands up to your face. He gently wiped away away your tears. His skin felt rough on yours, some dirt and oil smudging on your cheeks. "You're not stupid." The eldest Winchester stated firmly. "You're not useless either. You're smart-hell probably more than Sammy is. This Maths crap just isn't what you're made for is all."
Your tear-blurred eyes hesitantly met his green ones. The way he stared at you with that rare soft expression of his made you feel slightly better. "You're not mad?" To your annoyance, your voice came out small and soft. It made you feel like a child.
Dean snorted lightly before rolling his eyes with a chuckle. "Nah, sister, I ain't. I know you tried your best. Just because you failed one stupid Maths test don't mean I'm angry at you. If it makes you feel any better, I was never great at Maths. Too many letters and numbers and crap." That made you laugh. Dean smiled at your giggles, moving his thumbs against your skin to get rid of the last of the tears. "There we go, a pretty smile." Looking down at the letter next to his feet, your face fell. "I'll re-test. I'll work harder, I promise." Dean knew you were telling the truth by the determined expression you had.
Dropping his hands, Dean turned and picked up your results letter. "Screw the test." Dean dismissed. "Y'know what..." You watched as his green eyes flickered around the room as if searching for something before he went to a work desk nearby and grabbed a lighter. Before you could say anything, Dean flicked the lighter so a flame appeared holding it against the letter. Your eyes widened as Dean deliberately burned the letter. "Screw Maths too."
You smiled sincerely at him. You could always count on Dean, no matter how worthless he thought of himself. You wished he didn't think like that about himself. In your eyes, he was a hero. He was good man. You wished he knew how caring, brave, and smart as hell he was. Seeing your emotional smile, Dean's lips tugged up at the corners. "Atta girl."
"Don't you think that is kinda dangerous with all the oil everywhere." You gestured tentatively to the burning letter in his hand. Just as you'd said that, Dean dropped the letter when the flames hit his fingertips. He cursed under his breath as the letter dropped to a thankfully oil-free space on the floor. You both watched the paper turn black, curling in on itself as it burned before all that was left was burnt paper and ash. Staring at it, you tilted your head and asked quietly,"Dean?"
"Yeah, sweetheart?"
You turned to him wordlessly before hugging him. Dean seemed surprised for a second before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer, gently rubbing circles on your back. His chin rested on your head making you mentally retract your cursing about height differences. You sunk into his warmth, pressing your face to his chest in appreciation. This was safe. His embrace somehow made the room warmer, and you nudged closer to make the moment last longer. You could smell the oil and sweat on him. The scent mixed in with his aftershave and the faint smell of leather that always seemed to cling around Dean. "I love you." You muttered against his shirt.
Dean smiled a little. He didn't tease or joke this time instead hugging you just that little bit tighter. "I know, kid."