MALING AKALA. Akala ko walang katuturan ang kasabihang, maraming namamatay sa maling akala. But I was wrong. I got it all wrong. I used to believe that there's nothing compares to the pain a "simple lie" could inflict. But I was wrong again. Remorse does. There's nothing more painful than the pain regrets could give.
The fact that I cannot do anything to take back what I've said is too suffocating. I've already hurt her, that's the shear reality. I've gnawed her heart because of my stupidity. Dang it!
I'm really sorry, UK. I really am.
Why do I have to realize that she deserves the world when it's too late? Why do I feel this pain when it was all my fault in the first place? F*ck!
"Don't act as if you're hurt when you didn't think twice before lying to me, bitch. Enough of you're lies. I'm fed up."
I winced when a memory flashed through my mind. And a question hit me when I realized what I've done. Do I deserve to be loved? Do I deserve her love?
Gold Reign. I smiled bitterly while staring at her picture. Maybe foolishness is next to my name. Ang laki kong tanga para pakawalan siya. Ate Bridgette was right all along.
I breathe heavily. Matatanggap pa kaya niya ako? Matatanggap niya pa kaya ako sa buhay niya sa kabila ng lahat ng mga nasabi ko sa kanya?
"Ang lalim ah." I was halted when Dad sat beside me. Nasa veranda ako ng kwarto ko dito sa mansyon.
"Ano, anak? Na-realize mo na bang tanga ka? Nasa kamay mo na ang ginto, tinapon mo pa. Ang malala pa, pumulot ka pa ng bato at ipinukpok sa ulo mo."
I laughed painfully. Damn it! Dad's right.
"Dad, what did you do when you discovered that Mom has a another man aside from you?" I asked. I know their story as well. Minsan nang ikinuwento ni Mommy sa amin ni Ate Bridgette 'yon.
"Alam mo anak, naniniwala na talaga ako na, history repeats itself. Kasi napagdaanan na namin ng Mommy mo ang pinagdadaanan mo ngayon. Ang pinagkaiba nga lang, mas tanga ka." He chuckled and grabbed the bottle beside me.
"Tss. Believe me, I know it Dad."
"Alam mo naman kung gaano ako ka patay na patay sa Mommy mo di ba?" We laughed in unison. It's true. I've witnessed how madly inloved Dad with Mom was.
"At kahit hindi niya ako mahal noong una, hindi ako sumuko. I did everything to make her fall for me. Kahit ang sakit sakit na ay hindi pa rin ako bumitaw. Kasi pag binitawan ko siya, mas hindi ko kakayanin ang sakit. Ganun ko kamahal ang Mommy mo."
For a second, I remain bewildered. A memory of her chasing me flashed into my thoughts. She never stopped chasing me until I realized I have feelings for her too. She's one of a kind.
"Sa tingin mo mahal pa rin kaya niya ako, Dad?" I queried. Pero hindi ko maiwasang kabahan sa maaaring sagot ng sarili kong tanong.
"I don't know, son. Siya lang ang makakasagot ng tanong mo. Pero naniniwala akong 'pag minahal mo ang isang tao, kahit kailan hinding-hindi na 'yon mawawala pa. Maaaring makalimutan mo siya, but the feeling will always be there, hidden in the deepest part of your heart."
A little amount of hope gripped my heart. For now, I should not let the turmoil incorporate my mind. Iyon lang pag-asa ko.
"Thanks, Dad, but I hope it's not yet too late for me."
Dad tapped my back as sign of comfort. This is the first time that we talk like this. Most of time, we only talk about our business. It feels sublime.
"Remorse cannot change everything that has been done, son. You just have to accept the consequence of your mistakes and start over again. Win her back."
"I will, Dad. I will."
Wait for me, UK. Itatama ko ang pagkakamali ko, and this time I will never let you go. Not ever.
* * *
I'VE BEEN trying to surmount my fear. God knows how many times I took an audible breath every minute that move past another. This one is tough enough for me to face.
I took a deep breath for the nth time before pressing the doorbell. The moment the gate opened, my heart ricocheted in nervousness. For a while, I was filled with astonishment for finally seeing the Mijares mansion. Not bad.
Kinausap ko muna nang maikli ang guwardiya bago tuluyang pumasok. I hope I can get out of here alive.
"Ano po ang sadya nila?" Isang katulong ang sumalubong sa'kin sa nakabukas na pinto.
"A-ahm. I-I'm here for Gold Reign." Dang it! Why am I nervous?
"Ah, si Ma'am Princess po? Naku wala po siya rito."
"S-she isn't here?" I felt dejected knowing she isn't here. Wala rin siya sa condo niya nang pinuntahan ko siya. The unit was actually available for rent again. That means she left.
"Opo. Boyfriend ba kayo ni Ma'am Princess? Pero nandito po sina Sir Stan at Ma'am Amethyst."
"Princess?"
"Opo. Princess kasi ang tawag namin dito kay Ma'am Gold kasi prinsesa naman talaga siya sa bahay na 'to. Nag-iisang babae 'yon, eh."
Princess. She is a princess but I never treated her like one. And I admire her even more knowing she didn't brag about herself being a princess. She used to be a simple and persistent stalker. Nevertheless, I fell inlove with her being one.
"C-can I come in?"
"Ah, oo naman po. Pasok po kayo. Tatawagin ko lang sila Sir at Ma'am."
She gestured me to sit in the sofa before leaving me alone. I smiled looking at their family picture. I can see how happy she was.
"What brought you here, Villaceran?" My gaze automatically shifted to the voice behind. Anxiety filled me in when the famous Stanley Drew Mijares appeared in an instant. We know each other since we were rival in business.
"G-good morning, Sir."
"Magandang umaga din sa'yo. Ikaw ba si Bryce?" His wife responded. She must be Mrs. Shane Amethyst Mijares.
"Y-yes, Ma'am."
"I see." They both sat across my position. May katulong din na naglagay ng juice at ilang slice ng cake sa center table.
"Let's get to the point, what brought you here, man?"
"I-I'm here for your daughter, Sir." I was expecting him to punch me the moment he would face me but it was otherwise. I wonder what he was thinking.
"I thought you're not interested with our daughter--"
"I love your daughter, Ma'am, Sir." Mrs. Mijares mocked at me after I said that.
"Hindi ko alam kung anong klaseng pagmamahal meron ka para sa anak namin, Bryce. You judged her."
"I..I'm sorry... I regret everything, Ma'am. I didn't mean it all along. Hindi ko sinasadyang kainin ako ng galit at selos. Hindi ako nag-isip nang tama. But I'm here to redeem myself. I love your daughter... very much. J-just give a chance. Just one chance..." I ran out of words for a sudden. Their mere gaze crept me out. Nagkatinginan muna silang dalawa at ngumiti.
"We appreciate your effort to win our daughter back. Pero hindi ibig sabihin no'n ay pumapayag na kami. Prove your self first. Isa pa, huwag mo munang madaliin ang anak namin. She needs time for herself. I'm telling--" She wasn't able to finish her speech when an angelic voice interrupted out of the sudden.
"Mommy! Daddy!" Another beautiful lady with a swollen tummy appeared. She must be the wife of Skeet Alvan.
"Oh, napadalaw kayong dalawa."
"Nami-miss ko na kasi ang luto mo, Mommy," sabi ng babaeng buntis. Nakaakbay sa kanya ang asawa nito na diretsong nakatingin sa direksyon ko.
"Oh siya, ipagluluto kita ng paborito mo. Siya nga pala, Bryce, meet our eldest son, Skeet and our daughter-in-law, Nisyel." I immediately offered my hand for a handshake but the young Mijares siezed his wife's hand. Possessive, huh.
"Waah! Teka, teka, teka... Bryce ba kamo, Mommy? Ibig sabihin siya si Pangga ni Goldie?!" We all fell into surprise when the pregnant lady hysterically scrutinized my body.
"Ikaw si Bryce na palaging kinukuwento ni Goldie?!" She exclaimed. And before we could even react, she swiftly lifted my shirt exposing my stomach.
"Tama si Goldie, may abs ka nga!!! Pero hindi pa rin kita bet para sa kanya kasi inaway mo siya!" We gasped in unison followed by an exasperated cuss from Skeet Alvan...
"What are you doing, Mee?!"
-GREATFAIRY