❝Your compassion for others makes you vulnerable, but it also makes you strong.❞
"RIA, I'M SO GLAD you came." Dr. Klementine greets her with those perfect teeth placed behind full lips on a strikingly symmetrical brown face.
A poster therapist.
Every time Ria sees the woman, that's exactly how she views her. A perfectionist who mocks the chaos of her life.
It reflects in every element of her pristine office. A sophisticated square where everything is lined to perfection. From her doctorate certificate hanging on the far white wall to the glass vase placed in the center of a decorative table that stands directly before a glossed window. They reside in a perfect room to hold imperfect people.
Ria sinks into the cushions of her sofa and rubs her folded arms. "You told my friend that you haven't seen me and they got really upset. So..."
"Well, I was concerned about you. It's never a good sign when a patient with your complications disappears."
My complications.
Ria resists the urge to roll her eyes and scoff at the woman. What's so hard about saying bipolar? Why do people like to dance around the subject like it's a ticking time bomb? It should be clear as ever that she is fine. She's not crazy. She's not going to lose her mind. She's in control of herself.
"I don't think I need therapy anymore," she grumbles instead. "And I don't need medication. I've gone without it for most of my adult years and I'm fine."
Klementine gives her that annoying empathetic smile. The same smile her friends give her that cries 'You have no idea what you're talking about.'
"Ria, have you ever experienced a manic episode?"
She swallows the begrudging yes on her tongue and drags her eyes to the side. Dr. Klementine is well aware of the answer. She's heard the stories about the episodes Ria had when she was younger. But those days were back when she wasn't in control. When she had no idea about her disorder.
Now that she knows, she can control them and stop them.
"How often do you have depressive episodes?"
Far too many for my liking.
"If your answer is yes or more than one, then you need medication and these sessions could really help you if you let me in."
"I don't need help. I've lived with it just fine."
"Ria, those who try to handle this disease without help usually don't have happy endings."
"I've never been suicidal," Ria declares, immediately isolating what she's hinting around to.
"In the past four and a half months, you've gone through an unimaginable amount of trauma." She crosses one slender leg over the other and places dainty hands atop her knees. "You've lost Ashton."
Ria flinches and drags her eyes to the ground. "It doesn't matter. I don't love him anymore."
"You've lost your child and the ability to have other children."
Tears sting her eyes and she bites her lip. "I don't want ch-children anyway. I'd like to travel as I become more established and having a child would ruin that." The lie is a venomous mist in her ears.
The desire to have another chance to carry Ashton's child has eaten at her soul for months. She didn't know how bad it would hurt to lose something she never knew she wanted.
"And Chris? You're isolated in a toxic relationship with a man who used your grief against you."
"I loved him once. I can love him again."
"Ria, this is incredibly unhealthy. You're going to spiral down a road of chaos if you do not handle your pain correctly. I want to help you. Have you been using the journal I gave you?"
"No." Ria sinks even further. "I'm not good at writing. I express myself best when I paint or draw...or use my camera."
"You told me that painting reminds you of Ashton. I thought you might want to try something different. Does it help? To paint?"
"Sometimes." She shrugs and finds solace in pulling at the sleeves to her sweater. "It's cathartic sometimes, but others it hurts. Ashton and I...we first met in a gallery. We fell in love there. We built our relationship because of our love for art. When I'm there without him, it just reminds me of how much I miss him and I just don't understand anything."
"What is it that you don't understand?"
"Why did he leave me?" She looks up suddenly as if her therapist can provide an answer. "Why did he leave some stupid letter as his final words to me? Before he left, he told me he had a surprise. H-he gave me a promise ring and told me he'd take me to Italy to see the stars." Emotion bleeds into her voice and tears blur her vision. "We went to Florida together where he opened up about his past and his addiction. We were moving to California together. Why did he suddenly leave me? It doesn't make sense."
"These questions haunt you because you clearly still love him. Which is why you cannot love Chris even if you wanted to. You moved on from him and now you're together again to try and heal your pain and loneliness and it's not working. It's not a healthy way to cope with your loses. You need to focus on yourself, Ria."
Ria bites her lip and stares at the frayed ends to her sleeves. "I can't break up with him. Every time I try, he does something to make it impossible."
"He's manipulating you." Blunt and uncensored. She always gets like this when Ria tries to make excuses for him.
She blinks back tears and turns her head away. "Maybe I'm just a weak person."
"Strength comes in many different forms. You are a lot stronger than you think, Ria. You just focus too much on your weaknesses. You're a lover. A strong lover. Your compassion for others makes you vulnerable, but it also makes you strong. You simply need to focus more on loving yourself and taking care of your health. That means seeing me regularly. That means taking your medication. It means leaving toxic relationships behind and focusing on personal relationships with yourself."
Ria rubs her eyes and sniffs. "But what if I can't?"
Klementine leans forward with determination in her soft features. "Remember that you have a choice in this. It's not just about Chris and what he wants. You need to put yourself first at some point. You can't always focus on making everyone happy. Please remember that. What you do with your life and your body is always your decision."
"O-okay." She drags in a deep breath and tries to fight her undying grief. "I-I can try. I'll try to get some space from him."
"Good." Klementine smiles and inclines her head. "And you will take your stabilizers and continue our regular sessions, correct?"
Ria looks away before mumbling a soft, "Yes. Only because my friends want me to."
Though deep down, seeing her therapist has brought her a bit more relief than she'd like to admit.
"We need to stage an intervention." Jared folds his hands across the diner tabletop and lays his eyes one each of his friends — friends being a stretch for a certain attendee to this lunch meeting.
Dea and Sophia sit across from him, bundled up in sweaters and holding each other's hands between their glasses of lemonade and tea. Daniel resides on the far side of the booth, facing all three of them, arms folded in his tight long-sleeved t-shirt, eyes low and indifferent.
"And we need to act fast before Ria completely loses herself." Sophia waves a forkful of string beans in the air before slipping them between thin starving lips.
"I agree." Dea nods with a look of empathy. "Ever since the accident, she's just been silently spiraling. I don't think she's handling her grief well."
"How are we supposed to help her?" Daniel wonders in a voice barely harnessing a bit of emotion. "What are we even intervening?"
Jared presses his lips together and controls his irritation as he answers, "The fact that our best friend is driving herself into an irreversible depressive state. The fact that she's re-entered her toxic relationship with Chris and is literally tearing herself apart being with him."
Sophia points her fork at Daniel. "Not to mention she was nearly killed by your friend's crazy mafia boss. She lost his baby and then the jerk just disappears after leaving behind some terrible letter."
Dea presses her hand over her girlfriend's, imploring her to lower the fork. "Basically, we need answers. Solid answers. We refuse to be kept out of the loop this time around."
Jared nods. "I was able to help because I was informed about everything. Ashton trusted me-"
"You were in the loop because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time," Daniel interrupts, tone as flat as his expression. "You ran into Vivian and let her trick you."
Jared's eyes fall to the steaming plate of lasagna sitting on the table before him; his foot taps against the wooden leg. "That may be true, but I found out about things a lot faster because I was included." He lifts his attention to Sophia. "I think it's important that nothing is hidden from us any longer."
A delicate smile touches Sophia's lips and she brushes tufts of frizzy blond hair behind her ears. "Thank you. Keeping secrets from people is not the way to handle things. Especially not the things you and Ashton were hiding."
Ever since Sophia found out about her mother and Ashton, she's dropped numerous hints about how she despises keeping secrets and unintentional lying. Deep down, he's sure she wants answers. More answers. The desire to speak to the family she never knew she had.
"So, what should we do?" Her chest expands as earnest bleeds into her voice. Thick eyeliner thins as her eyes expand. "How do we go about bringing peace to the situation?"
"Ria wants closure," Jared answers. "If we can do that, maybe it'll awaken some acceptance in her. We could even find out that things aren't as they see-"
"So why am I here?" Daniel interrupts in a gruff tone. "I thought it was decided that I was no longer a friend to anyone in this group," he says the last part pointedly towards his sister.
Dea inclines her head and narrows russet eyes at him. "Because my best friend and brother decided to lie to me about their secret illegal lives for seven years. I'm entitled to be annoyed."
"And to completely cut me off," Daniel bites back. For a moment, Jared could swear a hint of emotion flickers in his eyes. "Not only did I lose Ashton, but I lost you as well."
"You have plenty of women to keep you company." Dea blows the stray hairs from her bun out of her eyes and folds her arms under her full chest.
"You know I don't care about them. They're just for sex."
Jared rubs his eyes beneath his glasses and groans. "This is about Ria's mental health. Can we pause everything else for now?"
"Sorry," Dea mumbles.
"Whatever." Daniel rolls his eyes and begins sipping his glass of wine. He mumbles something about how weak it is and not dining in a credible restaurant before downing the entire glass.
Ignoring his comment, Jared gathers himself and remembers why he even brought Daniel in the first place. "We need to find Ashton."
Daniel straightens up and his eyes expand as if Jared just demanded they all murder someone."Why?"
"Why not?" Dea flaunts her wrist before drawing a thin straw between her lips to sip her tea. "Last time he ran away without a word, it took us months to track him down. We have to make sure he's okay. Then get some answers out of him."
"I also don't trust that he would just break up with Ria the way he did. Something is odd about the way he left," Jared adds. "Ria says she would at least like some closure around Ashton's disappearance and I think we should investigate."
"Plus, we apparently have the same mother and I have a lot of things I would like to know. What better way than to ask the man who grew up with the woman himself?" Sophia shrugs and feigns indifference.
Jared holds back an empathetic look. He knows it's a lot deeper than that for her. "So we all have a reason to see him. We may even be able to talk some sense into him and make him talk to Ria again."
Sophia's mouth falls open, but Daniel shifts in his seat and speaks up first. "Why don't I just go alone? Ashton always listens to me. Plus, too many people could draw Vincent's attention."
"This Vincent guy shouldn't know about Sophia and Jared, right?" Dea wonders. "I think it'd be good for them to talk. Ashton's always wanted a family and Sophia is-"
"Not his family," she jumps in. "Ashton and I barely know each other." She fans her hands against the tabletop. "I need to learn a lot more about him before we even consider becoming a family. As of right now, he's a liar and a criminal who put my best friend's life at risk."
"That's fair." Jared shifts his glasses up his nose. "Though we can't forget that Ria wasn't too concerned about Ashton's history. She just wanted him back in her life. If she can forgive him, I think we can find it in ourselves to do the same."
"Okay, so you're leading this investigation then? What are we doing?" Daniel asks, growing visibly agitated with the jumping topic. He's tense in his seat again, eyes low, observing them as if they were children.
Jared squares his shoulders and swallows the sudden leadership role he's inherited. "We need to find out where Ashton lives and try to get into contact with him."
Daniel sighs and runs bronze fingers through raven locks. "In that case" — his voice lowers and he trains his gaze upon his empty lunch plate — "I have access to a secret email that Ashton created to contact us under Vincent's radar."
Jared narrows his eyes and Dea's mouth drops.
"What?" she screeches and tosses a table napkin at him. "Why haven't you said anything, idiota?"
Daniel swipes it away and glowers at her. "I was under the impression that you guys didn't care about us anymore."
"Of course, I care," Dea bites out, accent growing increasingly thick. Using extensive nails, she reaches out to pinch the taut muscle of his arm.
"Ouch." He winces and rubs the spot as it tinges an angry shade of crimson. "What the hell?"
"Do you just like keeping secrets from me?" she demands and pinches him again. "As much as I hate you guys, I still love you to death."
"You were too wrapped up in your little toy to really investigate anyway," he replies snidely, still rubbing his arm like a hurt child.
Sophia's face contorts in disbelief and she snarls at Daniel, "You're a real dick."
"Okay-okay-okay!" Jared holds his hands up as steam rises off the tips of Sophia's red ears. "Daniel has a way to contact Ashton. That's good. Find out his address and we'll work together to save up some cash for flights to California."
"What do we tell Ria?" Dea asks, holding her girlfriend back with one arm and pointing a steak knife at her brother with the other hand, all the while laying her determined eyes on Jared.
Swallowing hard, Jared begins to wonder if this is the best group of people to work with when devising a plan. With half of them already prepared to murder the other half, there's bound to be bloodshed before they even get to California.
"She probably won't want to come and that's fine," Jared assures, eyeing the knife Dea has pointed at her unimpressed brother. "As long as we give her something to break her from her current state, we'll have succeeded. Closure. That's my concern."
"And if it turns out Ashton does love Ria," Dea wonders, "doesn't that mean we have a much bigger problem on our hands?"
"I doubt that's the case," Daniel jumps in. He folds his hands before him and lands his stormy eyes on each tense face around the booth, keen on avoiding the weapon his sister wields against him. "Ashton has probably moved on by now."
"We'll just have to see when we get there." Jared swallows the lump of nervousness swelling in his throat. He's ready to dive head first into this issue for Ria, but he's not sure how his heart is going to be able to take this.
After all, Ashton isn't the only one waiting in California.
This was a boring chapter, I know, but here we are seeing the rise of a team(?) in a mission to find Ria closure and see if Ashton is okay!
How do you think this is going to work out? Especially with Daniel involved?
-bri💕